Steve PembertonQuotes

Rosie: [reading a dictionary] Putz: Noun - a yokel; a jerk.

Censor: My rabbi consultant says it means "Penis.

Rosie: We're allowed to say "Penis.

Censor: Yes, you can say "Penis." But this is the bad penis. Like "prick.

Rosie: And... what exactly is the "good" penis?

Adam: [starts to take unbutton his pants] Check it out.

Vicar: [everybody claps their hands] Three one! Thirty-one. Ah, Mrs. Lucas!

Mrs. Lucas: Over here!

Vicar: [the crowd stop clapping their hands; Bean pops out of the crowd; A nearby little girl named Lily turns on her [[iPod; [w:La Mer (song)|La Mer; everybody at the church, including Bean, clap their hands again; Bean sees that his ticket number is 6-1-6 which disgruntles him and causes him to dump it on a toy truck; Bean sees his ticket number upside down which reads 919, surprising him; right before the vicar gets another ticket from the bucket Bean quickly raises his ticket up as 9-1-9] Congratulations, Mrs. Lucas. And now to the first prize in today's raffle in aid of the "roof appeal." Thank you Lily. ], causing "]" to play] Indeed. The magnificent holiday to the south of France, kindly sponsored by Dalesborough Travel Limited. So, thank you guys. The winner of this prize will travel by Eurostar train to Paris then catch the fast train south before spending the week on the beaches of the French Riviera. This fabulous prize also includes 200 euros spending money and Barbara, this wonderful video camera kindly donated by A&K Electrics of Arbor Road. The winner of this amazing prize is: 9-1-9. Nine one nine. Anybody have ticket 9-1-9? If there is no claimant, I'll have to pick another ticket from the bucket. Anyone?

Mr. Bean: [everybody looks back at Bean and cheer as Bean joyfully walks to the stage, triumphant about winning the prize] YES!!!