Victoria Garcia-Kelleher Quotes

Memorable Quotes from Victoria Garcia-Kelleher

1 quote

Ghosted

Humor in a Produce Truck Conversation

Cole No pesticides, more nutrients. It just tastes better, you know. Out of 20. Sorry, guys. Five, six, seven. Have a good one.

[''Bagging a plant at a farmer's market''; ''Takes dollar bill''; ''Uses phone to find cashbox'']

Produce truck guy You know you're gonna need to buy stock in those trackers. You'd lose your butt if it wasn't attached to you.

Cole Well, you lost your hair, and that was attached.

Produce truck guy I walked into that one.

Edna Hey, Cole. Are you okay? Yeah, heard you got dumped.

Produce truck guy Tough break, man.

Cole Edna.

Edna I gossip when I'm bored.

Cole For your information, it was mutual.

Edna Mmm.

Produce truck guy That's what everyone says after getting dumped.

Edna That's true. Hmm. Maybe try being a little less needy, you know? Girls don't really like that.

Cole I'm not needy. We just grew apart. And I really just don't wanna talk about it.

[''Sighs'']

Edna You wanna go get high? I got a edible in the truck.

Cole No, thanks.

Edna Okay. Well, watch my booth. I'm gonna go get high.

Cole Enjoy.

Cole Can I help you?

[''Sadie approaches to Cole'']

Sadie Uh, yes, thank you. I'm gonna get that one.

Cole Begonia. Nice choice.

Sadie Is that what it is?

Cole Yeah.

Sadie It is pretty.

Cole Yeah. Don't let any pets eat the leaves. They can be slightly toxic.

Sadie Pretty and slightly toxic. What is it with me and roommates? Didn't realize you roomed with all of my exes. Mmm. How much watering does it need?

[''Chuckles'']

Cole Uh, every other day or so. Begonias need a little bit of love.

Sadie Uh... I... I'm actually gone a lot for work.

[''Sighs''; ''Stutters'']

Cole Okay. Okay, got it. Um, less love. Um, what about a snake plant? They only need watering every two weeks.

[''Chuckles'']

Sadie Sometimes I'm gone longer, like a month or two.

Cole Okay. Mmm. Sorry, then why do you want a plant if you're never home?

Sadie I'm not never home. I just... How about if you find me something a little less needy?

Cole Right. Um, why not just get a plastic plant?

Sadie That's sad.

Cole Well, not as sad as killing a plant. And some of the new ones, they look totally real. No amount of neglect will kill them.

Sadie Neglect? You know what, I'm... I'm gonna get this one.

Cole Yep.

Sadie Thank you.

Cole Sorry, I... I can't sell you this plant. I can't sell it to you in good conscience.

Sadie Good conscience? What are you, the patron saint of plants?

Cole I just don't feel comfortable selling a plant to someone that can be so indifferent towards a living thing.

Sadie Indifferent? Is this how you speak to all your customers? Cause if you do, I'm shocked that you sell anything at all.

Cole No, as a matter of fact, this isn't even my stall. I just don't wanna be an accomplice...

Sadie You're refusing to sell me a plant that you don't even own?

Cole That's right.

Edna Hey, Cole. What's going on?

Sadie Hi. Are these your plants?

Edna Yes.

Sadie Awesome. Cause Farmer Clown here won't sell me one.

Cole Farmer Clown. That's funny.

[''Chuckles'']

Edna The plant is $10, honey.

Cole Edna, sh... All right, you know what? Hey, want a plant? Here. Cactus. Requires the bare minimum love a human can give, so you'll totally kill it.

[''Grabs a mini cactus off shelf''; ''Sets it on counter'']

Sadie You should fire him.

Edna She's just gonna...

Cole Have a good one. RIP, little guy. Can you believe that?

Edna No. I thought for sure you two were gonna exchange numbers.

Cole What?

Edna Yes. I thought, under all that stupid fighting, you were flirting.

Cole Wait, we were flirting?!

Edna Are you kidding me?! Are you high? The sexual tension was off the charts!

[''Chuckles'']

Cole Edna, watch my stall.