A Night in Casablanca (1946) - Quotes

A Night in Casablanca's Humorous Promise

Taglines: 100 Girls! 1,000 Scenes! 10,000 Laffs!

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The Howl Raiser: A 1946 Perspective

Taglines: The Howl Raiser of 1946

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The Challenge of Saying No

Beatrice: You wouldn't say "No" to a lady!

Kornblow: Why not? They always say "No" to me!

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A Night in Casablanca - Dialogue 12

Kornblow: Call me Montgomery.

Beatrice: Is that your name?

Kornblow: No. I'm just breaking it in for a friend. How about getting rid of that mutt?

Beatrice: Oh, Frou-Frou's a watchdog.

Kornblow: Well, let him watch somebody else.

Beatrice: Oh, Frou-Frou won't bother us. He has such good manners.

Kornblow: If he had such good manners, he'd get off your lap and give me a seat. He can stand up better than I can, he's got twice as many legs.

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Conversation About Location in Casablanca

Kornblow: Who's he talkin to?

Corbaccio: Salt Lake City.

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A Night in Casablanca - Dialogue 10

Corbaccio: What you need is a good bodyguard.

Kornblow: What I need is a good body. The one I've got isn't worth guarding. By the way, since when are YOU a bodyguard? I thought you were in the camel business.

Corbaccio: Oh, well in the daytime, I'm in the camel business; at night, I'm a bodyguard.

Kornblow: I see; well, suppose I get killed in the daytime?

Corbaccio: Well, then I give you free ride on my camel. Look-a boss, I could keep you alive for fifty francs a week-

Kornblow: It isn't worth it.

Corbaccio: Well, you can't take it with you-

Kornblow: Well, I'm not gonna leave it lying around here.

Corbaccio: But-a boss! If I'm your bodyguard, I'll watch-a you like a mother watches her baby!

Kornblow: Is the mother pretty?

Corbaccio: What's-a the difference?

Kornblow: Well, there's a lotta difference; if the mother's pretty I'll watch the mother and you can watch the baby!

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Witty Exchange on Marital Shame

Mr. Smythe: Sir, this lady is my wife. You should be ashamed.

Ronald Kornblow: If this lady is your wife, YOU should be ashamed.

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A Night in Casablanca - Dialogue 8

Annette: [Noticing a very disheveled Mr. Kornblow making his way back to the hotel] Good heavens, Mr. Kornblow, what happened?

Kornblow: What happened! I was stood up by a woman, and knocked down by a car. These Casablanca drivers are terrible! He missed me three times. I finally had to climb a palm tree, and he hit that instead.

Anette: [chuckles] A palm tree?

Kornblow: Yeah... until I saw you two, I thought every date in town was broken!

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A Broke Man's Search for Information

Pierre: All right, what do you want?

Gambler: Not so quick, my friend. It costs money.

Pierre: Why ask me? You know I'm broke!

Gambler: I also know, that you're looking for a man who wears... a toupee.

Pierre: [Rusty and Corbaccio wander over] You know who he is?! This means everything to me; if you know who he is, please tell me!

Gambler: The wheel has been unkind to me tonight; I should like to try again. It would only take a few hundred francs...

Pierre: What the- I'll pay you, I promise!

Gambler: A croupier doesn't accept promises-

Pierre: [grabs his collar] Tell me his name!

Gambler: [pulls himself free and walks away] If you should happen to find a few hundred francs, I'll be at the Brass Monkey.

Corbaccio: What's the matter, Pierre, you need-a some money?

Pierre: [leaves] Don't worry, Corbaccio. I'll get what I want from that rat without money.

Corbaccio: [Rusty laughs and claps him on the back; Rusty rolls up his sleeves; Rusty reaches into a guest's pocket] He'll never get nothin from that rat without money. That rat's just-a like me. Eyy, what I say? I'm crazy. You know, I'm-a worried about Pierre. We gotta find him some money. You gotta idea? Eyy, notta that way!

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Flattery for a Favor

Kornblow: You know, I think you're the most beautiful woman in the whole world.

Beatrice: [eagerly] Do you really?

Kornblow: No, but I don't mind lying if it'll get me somewheres.

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Invitation to the Supper Club

Beatrice: I shall be in the Supper Club.

Kornblow: The Supper Club?

Beatrice: Yes. Will you join me?

Kornblow: Why? Are you coming apart?

Beatrice: Oh, come on now. You wouldn't say no to a lady.

Kornblow: I don't know why not. They always say no to me.

Beatrice: If you come to the Supper Club, I shall sing some opera for you. Bye-bye now...and remember, I shall be singing only for you.

Kornblow: [imitating Humphrey Bogart; as she leaves, he notices her swaying rear end and turns to the camera] ] "You don't have to sing for me... Just whistle." That reminds me, I must get my watch fixed!

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A Night in Casablanca - Dialogue 4

Kornblow: The first thing we're going to do is change all the numbers on all the rooms.

Hotel employee: But you can't do that! Think of the confusion!

Kornblow: Yes, but think of the fun!

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Introductions at the Hotel

Beatrice: My name's Beatrice Rheiner. I stop at the hotel.

Kornblow: My name's Ronald Kornblow. I stop at nothing!

A Night in Casablanca - Dialogue 2

Governor Galoux: [lying about why the last manager was "fired"] Monsieur! We caught him stealing money! We were forced to discharge him!

Kornblow: [tries to leave] I see. You want a manager that doesn't steal money. Good day, gentlemen.

Prefect of Police Capt. Brizzard: [holds Kornblow back] Please Monsieur Kornblow do not take offense. You are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Kornblow: Well, that's quite a trick. You try that sometime.

Conversations at the Street Market

Street Vendor: You buy? Nice, cheap, cheap-

Corbaccio: [to Kornblow] Eyy, scram. SCRAM! Get outta here. You gotta watch out for those guys, they take you to the cleaners.

Kornblow: What about you?

Corbaccio: I take you to the hotel.

Kornblow: Just what is your racket?

Corbaccio: I gotta no racket! I make up my living with camels.

Kornblow: What do you do with your camels?

Corbaccio: They're taxi-cabs. I'm-a President of the Yellow Camel Company.

Kornblow: [surprised] Aren't ALL the camels in Casablanca yellow?

Corbaccio: Eyy, you crazy. We gotta Checker Camel Company, too.

Humor in Unattainable Idealization

Ronald Kornblow: It's a funny thing. I've met a lot of pin-up girls, but I've never been able to pin one down.

Prioritizing Speed in Hotel Service

Ronald Kornblow: From now on the essence of this hotel will be speed. If a customer askes you for a three-minute egg, give it to him in two minutes. If he asks you for a two-minute egg, give it to him in one minute. If he askes you for a one-minute egg, give him the chicken and let him work it out for himself!

Resentment Towards Pointed Heads

Ronald Kornblow: I don't mind being killed, but I resent hearing it from a character whose head comes to a point!

A Night in Casablanca - Ronald Kornblow

Ronald Kornblow: After all, I'm a man and you're a woman... and I can't think of a better arrangement.

Questioning the Fate of the Last Manager

Ronald Kornblow: Well, gentlemen, I'm a different man behind a desk - as any stenographer can tell you. But, uh, what I want to know, is why they're burying the last manager. And don't tell me it's because he's dead.