11 quotes
Misunderstandings About Bad News
Mary
Okay. I have some bad news.
Tim
You're dying?
Mary
No, not that bad.
Tim
I'm dying?
Mary
No. My parents are in town. They're visiting and they're coming around.
Tim
Oh, God. Parents? American parents?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Family Secret About Time Travel
Dad
This is an odd ] for me because I had the same moment with my father when I'd just turned 21, and after it, my life was never the same so I approach it pretty, um, nervously.
[[moment]
Tim
Okay. When you're ready. It's all very ].
[[mysterious]
Dad
Uh... Right. Tim, my dear son, the uh... The simple ] is the men in this family have always had the ability to... This is going to sound strange, be prepared for ]. Get ready for spooky time, but there's this family ]. And the secret is that the men in this family can travel in time. Well, more accurately travel back in time. We can't travel into the ].
[[fact; [strangeness; [secret; Tim stares at him; [future]
Tim
This is such a weird ].
[[joke]
Dad
It's seriously not a joke.
Tim
So you're saying that you and granddad, and his brothers could all travel back in time?
Dad
Absolutely.
Tim
And you still do?
Dad
Absolutely. Although it's not as dramatic as it sounds. It's only in my own ]. I can only go to places where I actually was and can ]. I can't kill ] or shag ], unfortunately.
[[life; [remember; [Hitler; [w:Helen of Troy|Helen of Troy]
Tim
Okay, stop. Um... If it's true, which it isn't —
[sighs]
Dad
Although it is.
Tim
Although it isn't, ]. But if it was, which it's not —
[[obviously]
Dad
Which it is.
Tim
Which it isn't.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Joy of Reading for a Living
Tim
So, what do you do?
Mary
I'm a reader at a publisher.
Tim
No! You read for a living?
Mary
Yes. That's it, I read.
Tim
Oh, that's so great. It's like someone asking, "What do you do for a living?" "Well, I breathe. I'm a breather. I get paid for breathing." How did you get that job?
Mary
Okay, smart-ass, what do you do?
Tim
I am a ]. Sort of… Sort of.
[[lawyer]
Mary
That's ].
[[sexy]
Tim
Is it?
Mary
I mean, I think so. In a suit, in a court, saving people's lives. Kinda sexy.
Tim
I guess it is. Although it's not as sexy as reading. Sitting there in an office in a little chair reading. Ooh!
Mary
Okay, stop. Just wait right there mister, because you know a lot of ] get submitted to my publisher. So it's an immense ].
[[books; [responsibility]
Tim
I bet it is. But when you're doing normal reading, is it ruined because it's your job? You know, like ]? I always ] that when they stop being prostitutes that they can't enjoy sex anymore.
[they both laugh; [prostitutes; [worry]
Mary
You always worry about that?
Tim
No, I sometimes worry about that.
Mary
Oh, okay, good. Because someone who always worried about that would be a bit of a worry.
Tim
When you read a newspaper do you think, "Forget this, it's work"?
Mary
Have you interviewed a lot of prostitutes?
Tim
When you read a menu, do you think, "No, I'm not reading this, unless you pay me hard cash"?
Mary
How many prostitutes will you need to talk to before this issue is solved?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Celebrating Love Over Wedding Formalities
Harry
No. No. I'm at a wedding for God's sake. I'm here to celebrate true love not scribble my illegible signature on stupid bits of paper that you can flog on eBay so that at the next wedding you can wear a less hideous hat.
[''asked for an autograph'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing the Present in Everyday Life
Tim
And in the ] I ] I've ] the final lesson from my travels in ]; and I've even gone one step further than my ] did: The ] is I ] don't travel back at all, not even for the ], I just try to ] every day as if I've deliberately come back to this one day, to enjoy it, as if it was the full final day of my extraordinary, ordinary ].
[[end; [think; [learned; [time; [father; [truth; [now; [day; [live; [life]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Enduring Love and Commitment
Theme song
How long will I want you? As long as you want me to And longer by far…
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Eternal Love and Commitment
Theme song
How long will I ] you? As long as ] are above you And longer if I can…
[[love; [stars]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Proud Fatherhood and the Value of Kindness
Dad
Later on I may tell you about Tim's many failings as a man and as a table tennis player. But, important first is to say the one big thing. I've only loved three men in my life. My dad was a frosty bugger so that only leaves dear Uncle Desmond, B.B. King, obviously, and this young man here. I'd only give one piece of advice to anyone marrying. We're all quite similar in the end. We all get old and tell the same tales too many times. But try and marry someone kind. And this is a kind man with a good heart. I'm not particularly proud of many things in my life, but I am very proud to be the father of my son.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussion on Future Family Plans
Mary
What do you think about the kids?
Tim
What about them?
Mary
Not many of them, are there?
Tim
What?!
Mary
Well, I mean, two?
Tim
It's more than the Chinese are allowed.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Navigating Expectations of Time Travel
Tim
It's just... I though with the time thing...
Dad
No, I never said we could fix things. I specifically never said that. ]'s a mixed bag, no matter who you are. Look at ]: he was the son of a ], for God's sake and look how that turned out.
[[Life; [Jesus; [God]
Tim
I know... You must see I feel a bit cheated.
Dad
Don't. In ], feel the opposite. The only people who give up work at 50 are the time travelers with cancer who want to play more table tennis with their sons.
[[fact]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Playful Exchange About Pajamas
Mary
I'm going to go into the bedroom and put on my new pajamas.
Tim
Right.
Mary
And then in a minute you can come in and take them off.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.