Name: Beetlejuice
Genre: Fantasy, Comedy
Released: 1988-03-30
Duration: 92 min
Rating: 7.4
Cast: Alec Baldwin, Geena Davis, Winona Ryder, Catherine O'Hara, Jeffrey Jones

Beetlejuice

Frustration in Everyday Mishaps

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Don't you hate it when that happens?

[after his head spins]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Tensions Rise Over Beetlejuice's Chaos

Barbara Adam, why did you build that?

[about the whorehouse (Dante's Inferno) in the model]

Adam I didn't.

Juno Will you guys shut up and leave me alone? I've got all this paperwork to do. You two, come in. Sit down. Get in here, both of ya! The whorehouse was my idea. I want Beetlejuice out of the picture! You two have really screwed up! I received word that you allowed yourselves to be photographed, and you let Betelgeuse out and didn't put him back, and you let Otho get hold of the handbook!

[to the football players; to the Maitlands]

Adam When?

Juno Never trust the living! We cannot have a routine haunting like yours provide proof that there is existence beyond death.

[rolls her eyes]

Dumb Football Player Coach? Coach, where's the men's room?

Juno I'm not your coach! He survived.

Very Dumb Football Player Wait, Coach. Let me get somethin’ straight. What's our curfew around here?

Juno Will you get outta here?! Go on, get downstairs! "Men's room" - are ya kidding? Can't you read signs? I’ll be right back.

[to Adam and Barbara]

Dumb Football Player Coach?

Juno What?

Dumb Football Player I don't think we survived that crash.

Juno How did ya guess?

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Comment on a character's emotional state

Otho Fenlock Don't mind her. She's still upset because someone dropped a house on her sister.

[about Beryl]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

A Call to the Mysterious Beetlejuice

Barbara Maitland Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice! Beetlejuice!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Lydia's Preference for the House

Lydia Delia hates it. I could live here.

[on the new house; sees a huge spider on a web]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice Reflects on Performance Limits

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Thank you. Thank you. That, is why I won't do two shows a night anymore, babe, I won't.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Different Perspectives on a Haunted House

Charles Pumpkin, sweetheart... Go help your mother.

[kisses her and forces her out his study room]

Lydia Maybe you can relax in a haunted house, but I can't.

[leaves the room]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Artistic Expression in a Troubled Relationship

Delia Deetz Charles, I will not stop living and breathing art just because you need to relax. I'm here with you. I will live with you in this hellhole, but I must express myself. If you don't let me gut out this house and make it my own, I WILL GO INSANE AND I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!!!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice's Playful Observation of the Maitlands

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Ooh-la-la, what have we got here? The Maitlands. Cute couple. Look nice and stupid, too!

[reading obituary; laughs; more laughing]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

A Moment of Anticipation

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice It's showtime!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice's Defiant Declaration of Professionalism

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice YOU BUNCHA LOSERS!!! YOU'RE WORKIN WITH A PROFESSIONAL HERE!!! NICE FUCKIN MODEL!!!!

[kicks over a tree; quietly observes it for a moment; grabs his crotch and squeezes it twice with a bike horn sound]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Exploring the Unknown with Beetlejuice

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Let's turn on the juice and see what shakes loose.https://doyouremember.com/43467/9-favorite-beetlejuice-quotes

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Unconventional Appetite and Bold Propositions

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice I'll eat anything you want me to eat, I'll swallow anything you want me to swallow, so come on down and I'll...chew on a dog!

[howls]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

The Forbidden "B" Word

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Nobody says the "B" word.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Encountering Ghosts in the Attic

Lydia Are you the guys hiding out in the attic?

Adam We're ghosts!

[under the bedsheets]

Lydia What do you look like under there?

Adam Aren't you scared?

Lydia I'm not scared of sheets. Are you gross under there? Are you Night of the Living Dead under there? Like all bloody veins and pus?

Adam Night of the what?

Lydia Living Dead. It's a movie.

Barbara You know, if I had seen a ghost at your age I would have been scared outta my wits.

Lydia Of course I can see you.

Adam Well, how is it you see us and nobody else can?

Lydia Well, I've read through that handbook for the recently deceased. It says: Live people ignore the strange and unusual'. I, myself, am strange and unusual.

Barbara You look like a regular girl to me.

Adam You've read our book?

Lydia Yeah.

Adam You can follow it?

Lydia Yeah. Why were you guys creeping around in Delia's bedroom?

Adam We were trying to scare your mother.

Lydia Stepmother. Anyway, you can't scare her. She's sleeping with Prince Valium tonight.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice's Playful Introduction to the Maitlands

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Well...what do we got here tonight, kids? Oooo, well, we got the, uh, Maitlands. Uh, I think, uh, they've had enough "exorcise" for tonight.

[sees the Maitlands; mimes a golf swing and the Maitlands fall onto the floor]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Shopping Announcement from Beetlejuice

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Attention, K-Mart shoppers!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Lydia Deetz Reflects on Death and Reality

Lydia Deetz The funeral. God. You guys really are dead.

[realizing that Adam and Barbara are ghosts]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Beetlejuice

Family Dinner Conversation in a New Home

Delia I can't believe we're eating Cantonese. Is there no Szechuan up here?

Lydia I plan to have a stroke from the amount of MSG that's in this food.

Delia This is our first meal in this house, so why don't we all do our little private parts to make it a pleasant one?

Charles Don't bait your mother, Pumpkin. As soon as we get settled, we'll build you a darkroom in the basement.

Lydia My whole life is a darkroom. One. Big. Dark. Room.

Delia So you were miserable in ], and now you're going to be miserable out here in the sticks. At least someone's life hasn't been upheaved.

[[New York City]

Beetlejuice

Questioning the Existence of Rules

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Hey, these aren't my rules! Come to think of it, I don't have any rules!

Beetlejuice

Qualifications of a Dead Guy

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Ah, well, I attended Juilliard, I am a graduate of the Harvard Business School, I travel quite extensively, I lived through the ] and I had a pretty good time during that, I've seen ] about 167 TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTIN FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT! NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TALKIN TO A DEAD GUY! NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK?! You think I'm qualified?

[calmly; [w:Black Death|Black Plague; getting aggressively more demented; [w:The Exorcist|The Exorcist; calmly]

Beetlejuice

Questioning Survival After the Crash

Adam Barbara, I don't think we survived that crash.

Beetlejuice

Embracing Their Supernatural Identity

Adam Maitland We're ghosts!

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice Promises Fun and Mischief

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Not so fast, round boy. We're gonna have some laughs!

[to Otho; Kisses Otho on the cheek and laughs]

Beetlejuice

Confronting the Reality of Death

Juno What's wrong?

Barbara We're very unhappy.

Juno What did you expect? You're dead.

Beetlejuice

Qualifications and Scares in a Unique Encounter

Adam For instance, uh, what are your qualifications?

Beetlejuice Ah, well...I attended Juilliard...I'm a graduate of the Harvard Business School. I travel quite extensively. I lived through the ] and had a pretty good time during that. I've seen ] about 167 TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTIN FUNNIER EVERY... SINGLE...TIME I SEE IT! NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TALKIN’ TO A DEAD GUY! NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK?! You think I'm qualified?

[refined voice; [w:Black Death|Black Plague; getting progressively more demented; [w:The Exorcist (film)|The Exorcist; screams; quietly]

Adam Uh, what I meant is, can you be scary?

Beetlejuice Oh! I didn't know what you were askin me. Can I be scary? What do ya think of this? You like it?

[shows a hideous face to the Maitlands that only shows tentacles from the sides to audience; both Adam and Barbara scream; back to normal]

Beetlejuice

A Disturbing Declaration by Beetlejuice

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice We come for your daughter, Chuck.

Beetlejuice

Life Perceived as a Darkroom

Lydia Deetz My whole life is a darkroom. One. Big. Dark. Room.

[slowly, for effect]

Beetlejuice

Beetlejuice Comments on Size and Elvis

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice Pardon me. Did you do that? Nice work. Lemme ask you somethin'. How do you get em so small? There goes Elvis! Yo, King! Well, looks like I'm next. Good thing, too. (

[last lines; talking to a witch doctor; referring to Harry the Hunter; Distracting the witch doctor; witch doctor looks away, he switches his ticket with witch doctor's]

Beetlejuice

The Ghost with the Most

Betelgeuse/"Beetlejuice I'm the ghost with the most, babe.

Beetlejuice Quotes