Cabin Fever Quotes

Marcy Jesus, Paul, you really did a number on my back!

Taglines Cabin Fever... Catch It!

Tommy Boy, you want to give me one good reason why you would steal a Snickers bar?

Bert The nougat?

Jeff Tell them about The Happy Bald Guy.

Karen No, I can't take it

Paul He was the guy that gave us our shoes and quarters for the video games. There was a room with a pool table too, but my dad wouldn't let us go back there. The bald guy was always happy, always smiling. But the killer got him too. When the cops searched the place, they found all the hacked off limbs at the end of the bowling lanes. The guy had bowled people's organs. Arms, legs, everything. They found the bald guy's head in the ball return. He was still smiling.

Dennis Pancakes! PANCAKES! PANCAKES!

Bert No, No Pancakes!

Dennis PANCAKES!!!

Bert No Pancakes!

Marcy We're all going to get it. We're all going to get sick and Jeff's off in the woods getting drunk!

Paul Bert's going to get help. Karen will be fine, I promise.

Marcy It's like being on a plane when you know it's going to crash. Everybody around you is screaming and yelling, "We're going down! We're going down!" And all you really want to do is grab the person next to you and fuck the shit out of them, because you know you're going to be dead soon, anyway.

Paul You don't use condoms?

Marcy Don't worry, I'm healthy.

Paul Hey, where are you going?

Karen Where does it look like I'm going?

Paul But, well, I thought we were kissing.

Karen Yeah, we were, weren't we?

Paul So... you like me now? Like, is this a date?

Karen Don't be gay. When you've known someone a long time, you just want to kiss them just to see if they're a good kisser. There's nothing wrong with that, right?

Karen Bert, what the hell is that?

Bert I'm going to go shoot some squirrels.

Paul Why would you want to kill squirrels?

Bert Because they're gay.

Karen Bert, don't be a fucking retard.

Bert I'm kidding. I don't care if they're gay or straight, I'll kill them either way.

Taglines Who Will Survive The Fever

Jeff I made it! I made it! I knew I'd make it! I fucking made it!

Karen That guy asked for our help, and we lit him on fire! You'll understand if I'm not in a particularly social mood.

Karen Wait... Is your dog friendly?

Taglines Terror In The Flesh

Paul Jeff! Jeff, it's the water! Wherever you are, don't drink the water!

Jeff I don't want any of us getting sick, but you two fuckin fuckers insist on touching her, now she's bleeding all over both you guys! So you two can fuckin rot, but not me, no fuckin way not me!

Deputy Winston Looks like you guys were doing some pretty good partying, huh?

Paul Yeah, you know, we were drinking and then this guy came along and tried to break into the cabin. We had no choice but to get rough. I feel awful, but he was going crazy. He smashed into our car, and then he wouldn't come out, so... we had to hit him. We hurt him. We were terrified. We didn't know what to do. That's why we went to look for help...

Deputy Winston Hey, man, I told you... I'm gonna make a report. Don't worry about it. He ain't gonna come back. Looks like you guys scared him away pretty good. I ain't gonna let him ruin your fun.

Paul Thank you. My friend's inside right now and she's pretty freaked out. She wants to go home. We all kind of do.

Deputy Winston A lady friend, huh? I bet you like to party.

Taglines Catch The Fever!