Faces Quotes

Richard Forst I want a divorce.

Richard Forst Did you hear what I said?

Maria Forst Oh, Dickie...

Richard Forst That's the only thing to do, isn't it? Well, why don't you laugh? It's funny!

Richard Forst What do you want to drink?

Maria Forst Well, whatever it is, I want it on the rocks, straight and dirty, because I feel very very bitchy tonight.

Richard Forst Well, I feel very, very bitchy too. That makes two of us.

Richard Forst You get laid once and everything is solved! Get all the soldiers in Vietnam laid and the whole Middle East problem is solved!

Billy Mae They are scared of you. They are.

Chet Really?

Billy Mae They are scared of your youth and your, uh, spirit and your build. They think that they are the kings of the earth, and they do not want you taking away our place, see?

Chet Well, I don't want it.

Richard Forst Jeannie, do me a favor. Don't be silly anymore. Just be yourself.

Jeannie Rapp But I am myself. Who else would I be?

Richard Forst I'm serious.

Jeannie Rapp Definition of serious: Blah blah blah blah...

Maria Forst There's a ] film in the neighborhood.

Richard Forst I don't feel like getting depressed tonight.

Chet I think we're making fools of ourselves.

Louise What?

Chet Yeah.

Louise I'm making a fool of myself?

Chet Well, we are. Yeah.

Louise Well, who are you to criticize me?

Chet I'm not criticizing; I'm just saying.

Louise Well, you don't have to tell me I'm making a fool of myself. Look, I know how to dance my way. I don't need you to tell me about it. I come from a musical background. I take care of a family of five. I have a college degree, and I don't need you to tell me I'm making a fool of myself.

Richard Forst I think we were all created evil! Then some... or some wise guy, some, uh, a leftwinger, or a, a union organizer comes along and tells us that we were all created good, we were all created in His image.

Jeannie Rapp Skinny people are not like fat people. Fat people are jolly. Right?

Richard Forst Wrong. Skinny people are happy because they're not fat.

Richard Forst No place like home.

Maria Forst What?

Richard Forst I said, "Have you ever been to Rome?

Richard Forst You're not fat.

Jeannie Rapp What?

Richard Forst You're voluptuous.

Jim McCarthy We had a couple of bimbos with no... Actually they were, they were very nice girls. They reminded me a lot of you two.

Jim McCarthy How did we get into this?

Joe Jackson How did we get into it? How the hell do we get out of it?

Jeannie Rapp You're a son-of-a-bitch, do you know that?

Richard Forst Why am I a son-of-a-bitch?

Jeannie Rapp Because you get to me.

Florence You know, these dances, these wild crazy dances--I think they've succeeded where science failed. Cause you know, I can go to a beauty parlor and sit there for hours having my hair done and my nails polished, but I don't feel any younger. I might look it. These dances, these wild crazy dances--they do something to me inside.

Comedian I just wanted you to see my suit. Seersucker. Sears made it, you're looking at the sucker that bought it.

Comedian The postman came with a letter and, uh, told me that the ] was having a war on poverty. So, uh, I told him, if that is true, I want to be the first to surrender.

Richard Forst Why did the man throw, throw the clock out of the window, huh? He wanted to see time fly.

Richard Forst What is it that's black and white and red all over?

Maria Forst A newspaper.

Richard Forst No, a zebra's ass.

Freddie By the way, Jeannie, what do you charge?

Jeannie Rapp Freddie... Aw, Freddie... Aw, Freddie... Aw, no, Freddie... Don't spoil it, Freddie, please.

Freddie Spoil what? Honey, I'm game for anything. I just wanna know how much you charge. It's legitimate, isn't it? I know I have to pay. I'm not too schooled in these thngs, but I know that somewhere along the line, your little hand is going to find its way into my pocket. You're shocked, aren't you, old Dickie, old pal? What do you think she is? You think she's some clean towel that's never been used? My God, Dickie, you think you don't pay? How many times a week does Maria ask you for some money? Money, child, is a necessity, and don't you think that you don't work for it and pay for it. My God, what, what is this? He thinks I'm insulting you. I'm offering you. Hell, look, what's the matter? If I went to one of those fancy restaurants, I'd probably tip the headwaiter, the waiter, the busboy, and a hundred bucks goes flying down the drain--and I couldn't have any more fun than I could with Jeannie here.