Defining the Consequences of Nuclear Accidents
Newspaperman:
Mr. Farnsworth, isn't it true an accident in your west coast nuclear plant could stimulate seismic activity in the San Andreas fault, which could destroy most of Southern California?
Tony:
I think you'd have to define "destroy".
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Cocoa for a Pretend Conversation
Bentley: [on the landing of the elegant stairway, near the closet where Mr. Farnsworth and Joe Pendleton meet with Mr. Jordan, invisible to everyone but himself]
I noticed there are two cups.
Everett:
Well, Sisk felt that since Mr. Farnsworth was pretending to talk to someone, he might want to pretend to give him cocoa, too.
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Questioning Polo Skills in Heaven Can Wait
Joe:
Do I... play Polo?
Sisk:
Not really, sir.
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Love and Destiny in Heaven Can Wait
Joe:
She love me, Mr. Jordan!
Mr. Jordan:
Joe, you must abide by what is written.
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Team Decisions and Birthday Wishes
Max:
You be the trainer and I'll start on Sunday.
Joe:
I'm starting against Dallas? What about Jarrett?
Max:
They don't want to go with Jarrett. They want to go with you. Happy Birthday, Joe!
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Mouse Encounter at the Farnsworths' Home
Tony: [after ushering the shrieking Mrs. Julia Farnsworth out of her husband's office and, from the doorway]
Sorry to disturb you, Mr. Farnsworth. Mrs. Farnsworth saw a mouse.
Betty:
She just saw a mouse?
Tony:
No, before. Outside, but she relives it.
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Pressure and Ruthlessness in Business Deals
Former owner:
He got my team. The son of a bitch got my team.
Advisor:
What kind of pressure did he use, Milt?
Former owner:
What I asked for was sixty-seven million, and he said "okay.
Advisor:
Ruthless bastard.
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Misunderstandings Amid Unlikely Circumstances
Julia:
You locked me in a closet!
Max: [whilst training Pendleton in the spacious mansion grounds]
This isn't going to work. You're playing football with a bunch of butlers!
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Value of Investment in Conservation Efforts
Joe:
We don't care how much it costs, just how much it makes. If it costs too much, we charge a penny more. Would you pay more to save a fish who thinks?
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Identity Confusion in Heaven Can Wait
Joe:
I'm not really Leo Farnsworth.
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Unexpected Presence in an Unlikely Place
Joe:
I'm not supposed to be here.
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The Paradox of Being Right and Wrong
Mr. Jordan:
The likelihood of one individual being right increases in direct proportion to the intensity with which others are trying to prove him wrong.
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Observing a Disturbing Situation Unfold
Mr. Jordan:
He's been drugged by those two downstairs. This is a murder. See how he's slowly sliding into the water?
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