6 quotes
Dressing Dolls for Good Will Donation
Izzy
Now these stay on the shelf... And these go to Good Will.
[indicating a pile of dolls]
Rosie
Oh no. They're all skinny and naked, and laying in a pile! We have to dress them.
[realising a problem]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Casting Rejection in the Entertainment Industry
TV executive
Courtney Love?
Producer
Drugged-out hag.
TV executive
Faye Dunaway?
Producer
Don't call us, we'll call you.
TV executive
Sharon Stone?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Geena Davis?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Sigourney Weaver?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Kim Basinger?
Producer
Hag.
TV executive
Emma Thompson?
Producer
Brit hag.
TV executive
Susan Sarandon?
Producer
Red state-alienating hag.
TV executive
Meg Ryan?
Producer
Too much plastic surgery.
TV executive
Melanie Griffith?
Producer
Way too much plastic surgery.
TV executive
Patricia Heaton?
Producer
Pointless plastic surgery.
TV executive
Cher?
Producer
Insurmountable amount of plastic surgery.
Rosie
Listen, you little bird of a ]! Where do you come off insulting these women? How many hit songs did you sing? How many Oscars do you have? Could you look cute next to Warren Beatty? Or live with Don Johnson? Or act with Ted Danson? You're not worthy of kissing Cher's tattooed ass!
[angrily; [man]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing Aging with Toughness and Acceptance
Quotes
But now they're all gonna get old and you know what i say you know what i have to say about that. TOUGH SHIT
[About humans]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Generational Differences in Playtime Preferences
Izzy
Ma, I'm to old for Barbies.
Rosie
Yeah, but I'm not.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Age Inquiry Between Adam and Rosie
Adam
I'm 31. How old are you?
Rosie
38.
Rosie
I'm not really 38.
Adam
Well, how old are you?
Rosie
37.
Adam
Okay. Well, I'm 30.
Rosie
40.
Adam
29.
[continues kissing her]
Rosie
What!? You're 29? What happened to 30? You're not even in your thirties?
[coming to an abrupt stop]
Adam
What happened to 29?
[confused]
Rosie
You're not even in your 30s!
Adam
Yeah? Well, neither are you.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussion of Language and Its Meanings
Rosie
Putz: Noun - a yokel; a jerk.
[reading a dictionary]
Censor
My rabbi consultant says it means "Penis.
Rosie
We're allowed to say "Penis.
Censor
Yes, you can say "Penis." But this is the bad penis. Like "prick.
Rosie
And... what exactly is the "good" penis?
Adam
Check it out.
[starts to take unbutton his pants]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.