I ♥ Huckabees (2004) - Quotes

The Nature of the Universe Explained

Bernard Jaffe: The universe is an infinite sphere whose center is everywhere and whose circumference is nowhere.

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Focus Your Mind on Helpful Thoughts

Bernard Jaffe: Your mind is always occupied on something...so it may as well be something helpful, like Mrs. Shermer, or the blanket.

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The urgency of understanding infinity

Bernard Jaffe: No time for infinity? Gotta piece together a theory?

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Metaphor for Universal Connection and Existence

Bernard Jaffe: Say this blanket represents all the matter and energy in the universe, okay? This is me, this is you, And over here, this is the Eiffel Tower, right, it's Paris!

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Mathematics of Infinity Explained

Bernard Jaffe: There is no remainder in the mathematics of Infinity.

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The Concept of Nothingness Explained

Bernard Jaffe: There's no such thing as nothing. nnn

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Concept of Self in Interconnectedness

Bernard Jaffe: There is no such thing as you or me,

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Embracing Contentment in Self-Acceptance

Bernard Jaffe: When you get the blanket thing you can relax because everything you could ever want or be you already have and are.

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Recognition in Unexpected Places

Brad Stand: Did you see that? Shania knew who I was.

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Frustration Over Unseen Perspectives

Brad Stand: [after Caterine snaps a photo of his sobbing] NOBODY SEES THAT PICTURE!!!

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Questioning the Importance of Family Life

Brad Stand: Why is marriage and kids so important? I mean, there's an overpopulation problem!

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Shania's Concern is Acknowledged

Brad Stand: Shania cares!

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Misunderstood Preferences and Unexpected Revelations

Brad Stand: Shania hates mayo, alright, and she can't eat chicken salad, that's no joke. We gave it to her once, she threw up in the limo - the lady hates chicken salad. So I bring out a bunch of tuna fish sandwiches - she still doesn't believe me - I say, Shania, I'm allergic to mayo - which, by the way, is a lie. Shania still doesn't believe me so I eat two of the sandwiches in front of her to prove it. So she eats one and a half sandwiches, one and a half sandwiches... before she realizes, its chicken salad. And she liked them!

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Balancing Personal Gain and Environmental Concern

Brad Stand: Do I benefit from getting some great P.R. For Huckabees when we need it? Absolutely. But do I care about saving the open spaces? Yes, I do!

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Questioning Personal Identity

Brad Stand: [repeated] How am I not myself?

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The Disappearance of Gazelles in Consumerism

Brad Stand: Huckabees cornucopia of stuff we all want. But what happened to the gazelles? Were they squashed under the CD department?

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Questioning the Nature of Observation

Albert Markovski: What?! Is it a crime? Is it a crime to look at Lange?!

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Existence of Others Surprises Albert Markovski

Albert Markovski: [to Vivian Jaffe] I can't believe you guys actually exist.

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Crisis of Purpose and Identity

Albert Markovski: Motherfucking cocksucker motherfucking shoot Mother what am I doing? What am I doing? I don't know what I'm doing. I'm doing the best that I can. I know that's all I can ask of myself. Is that good enough? Is my work doing any good? Is anybody paying attention? Is it hopeless to try and change things? The African guy is a sign, right? Because if he isn't, than nothing in this world makes any sense to me. I'm trapped! Maybe I should quit. Don't quit! Maybe I should just fucking quit. Don't fucking quit! I don't know what the fuck I'm supposed to do anymore! Mother! Fuck shoot!

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Perception of Similarity in Diversity

Albert Markovski: Everything is the same, even if it's different.

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Reality of Suburbia versus Infinity

Albert Markovski: We're not in Infinity, we're in the suburbs

Fear of Confrontation and Hostility

Albert Markovski: [about the body bag exercise] I can't go back in there. It's all hating faces that I have to chop up with a machete!

The Wisdom of Stillness from a Rock

Albert Markovski: Nobody sits like this rock sits. You rock, rock. The rock just sits and is. You show us how to just sit here and that's what we need.

Questioning Cooperation in a Troubled World

Albert Markovski: Betrayed by Albert Markovski. Is it possible for anybody in this world to work together to make it better? I don't think so.

Existence and Identity in a Temporary World

Tommy Corn: If this world is temporary, identity is an illusion, then everything is meaningless and it doesn't matter if you use petroleum, and that's got me very confused.

Call for Unity in Crisis

Tommy Corn: Why are you guys wasting all of your time fighting each other? I mean, come on, seriously. Put the egos aside for a second, guys, please. Deal with the issues, okay. We have a deadly petroleum situation, not to mention cystic f-- SHUT UP! SHUT! -- Cystic Fibrosis, civil war in Africa, toxic fish. You have children in your own community who are going to prison. Father Flavin doesn't have the money to help them! Ma'am, listen to me!

Tommy Corn's Take on a Philosophical Figure

Tommy Corn: Aaah, here he comes! The man poet who banged France's Dark Lady of Philosophy! The parking lot crusader of truth who turned his back on his Other like a cold-blooded gangsta.