Kick-Ass 2 (2013) - Quotes

Mindy's Intense Training Regimen for Dave

Dave: [narrating] Mindy beat me like morning wood, every day for three weeks.

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Team Dynamics in Superhero Partnerships

Dave: I wanna team up, like Batman and Robin.

Mindy: Nobody wants to be Robin.

Dave: What's wrong with Robin? Weren't you like Big Daddy's Robin?

Mindy: Robin wishes he was me.

Dave: [[w:The Dynamic Duo|the Dynamic Duo] What I'm trying to say is, we should be partners. You and me, like ].

Mindy: [[w:NFL|NFL] I'm in the ], Dave. You play pee-wee.

Dave: So, train me. I wanna walk the walk, and you're the closest thing I know to a real superhero. Aren't you tired of being on your own? Don't you wanna know someone's there for you? Someone who's got your back?

Mindy: And you'll do anything I say?

Dave: Anything.

Mindy: Hit me.

Dave: [Mindy slaps him] You're a fifteen-year-old girl... What the hell?

Mindy: Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch.

Dave: Oh, God.

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Endless Pursuit of Justice

Sal Bertolinni/Colonel Stars and Stripes: [last words, before dying] Justice...For...ever!

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Humorous remark about an unexpected situation

Sal Bertolinni/Colonel Stars and Stripes: Heh heh, yeah! There's a dog on your balls!

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Colonel Stars and Stripes Initiates a Challenge

Sal Bertolinni/Colonel Stars and Stripes: Alright, time for initiation. Turn around and I'll unzip you.

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Desire for Immortality and Revenge

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: You made this real! You started it! Now, I'm gonna finish it--I'll be immortal, like an evil Jesus.

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A Vow to Destroy Kick-Ass's World

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: I'm here to end Kick-Ass--not just to kill him. I am gonna shit on everything that he loves!

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Desire for Risk and Reward Explained

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: No. No. People WANT to win the lottery, People WANT to fuck Scarlett Johansson, No one WANTS to risk their life so some moron can walk through the projects at night.

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Confrontation Over a Father's Death

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: Your dad?! You blew up my dad with a bazooka!

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Questioning the Purpose of a Mask

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: What's the point of wearing a mask if you can't do what you want?!

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Aggressive Threat from The Motherfucker

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: I'm gonna wipe my ass with your face!

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Overconfidence in Numbers and Strategy

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: Are you really that stupid? There's two of you and a whole army of us, Do you really have such a hard-on to die?

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Wealth as a Superpower

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: My superpower is that I'm rich as shit.

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Character Name Change Announcement

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: Red Mist was my superhero name. Henceforth, I'll be known as...The Motherfucker!

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Seeking Revenge for a Father's Death

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: I'm going to make Kick-Ass pay for what he did to my Dad.

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Building an Evil Army Announcement

Chris D'Amico/The Motherfucker: Get the word out that I'm building an evil army.

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Embracing Pain as a Path to Heroism

Mindy Macready/Hit-Girl: Dave, your father loved you. Just like my daddy loved me. And I know it hurts. But maybe-maybe that's the real meaning of being a superhero. It's taking that pain and turning it into something good. Something right. Remember what you told me? "This is your life. You got to live it." Now help me find some pliers. I'm gonna make this guy eat his own dick.

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