A Christmas Wish with Unexpected Responses
Santa:
What would you like for Christmas, little girl?
Angie Vega:
I'd like you to find a chimney, and shove your...
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Holiday Break and Religious Beliefs Discussed
Ed Chapman:
Why isn't she in school?
Angie Vega:
I'm off for the holidays.
Ed Chapman:
Christmas is two weeks away.
Angie Vega:
I'm very religious, you got a problem with that?
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Recess Disappointments and Audition Realities
Girl: [overacting]
I hate it when it's raining. We don't get to go outside for recess or ride our bikes after school!
Angie:
That's great. But you're not going to audition like that, right?
Girl:
What do you mean?
Angie:
They're just cookies. Don't make it sound like a commercial for hemorrhoids.
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Preparing for a Performance Challenge
Barry:
You two clowns leave while I get into character.
Michael:
What character? All you got to do is swallow.
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Coffee Order with a Hint of Sarcasm
Angie:
I'll have coffee.
Galaxy Waiter: [laughs]
Coffee?
Angie:
Yeah, coffee. It comes from beans. Ever heard of it?
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Celebrity Status and Political Jokes
Michael:
I'm something of a celebrity.
Irate:
What kind of celebrity are you? Biggest Asshole of the Month?
Michael:
No, that's all political.
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Shared Musical Appreciation Between Friends
Geena: [after Asian girl sings]
I love that song.
Michael:
Me too. What were you playing?
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A Lighthearted Exchange on a Unique Situation
Ed: [after Mikey tells him he invited Angie to his house; [The Omen]
Well, now representing ]. Did you check her head with a little 666?
Michael:
Yeah, there were only two sixes. We got her just fine!
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Anticipation for Return to Connecticut
Carol:
Oh, I can't wait to get back to Connecticut.
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Frustration with Unpleasant Tasks
Barry Corman:
How much of this crap do I have to eat anyway? What am I? Jobe?
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Catchy Greeting from Barry Corman
Barry Corman: [after seeing Angie for the first time]
Va Va Va Vroom. Well, Hello Dolly!
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Commitment to Kosher Franks Only
Barry Corman: [after vomiting in a hat]
Never again. From now on, it's only Kosher Franks.
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Joyful Moments with Sunburst Cookies
Angie Vega:
Sunburst Cookies just light up my day!
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The Nature of Show Business
Michael "Mikey" Chapman:
But that's what show business is all about. Acting like an idiot. It's not you, you're just doing your job. You know what I mean. Look at it this way, most people feel like idiots most of the time. But they don't get paid for it.
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Request for Time Off for Good Behavior
Michael "Mikey" Chapman:
Any chance for getting time off for good behavior?
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