32 quotes
Recognizing Executive Potential in Job Applicants
Mr. Richards
Please. Listen, I pride myself on being able to size up a job applicant and see just what kind of executive potential he has. I have just the job for you.
[to Jonathan]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Felix Questions Boy's Assignment at Event
Felix
Just what is your assignment here tonight, boy?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Store Opening Challenges and Optimism
Claire
I don't know how we're going to make this store great again.
Jonathan
Looks fine to me. What time do we open?
Claire
We are open.
[sighs sadly]
Jonathan
Oh... Well, I'm sure things will pick up by lunch.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Creation and Inspiration Beyond This World
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
When you were making me, didn't you feel a certain inspiration? Almost like your hands were moved by force not of this world? You made this body so that I could come to life!
[to Jonathan, coming to life]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning the presence of musicians
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
Where do they hide all the musicians?
[looking at a stereo system playing]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Preference for Traditional Hand Tools
Jonathan Switcher
Why don't we stick to good old-fashioned hand tools for the time being, okay?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Store Success and Unconventional Behavior
Claire Timkin
Mr. Richards, this store has never been more successful, and it's all due to Jonathan Switcher. I don't care if he puts a rubber glove on his head and runs naked around the store screaming: "Hi, I'm a squid!
Roxie Shield
Jonathan, you're riding around town with a mannequin on the back of your motorcycle! What is wrong with this picture?!
[notices Jonathan with Emmy, suddenly surprised]
Captain Felix Maxwell
Enough of this surveillance crap! Captain Felix Maxwell takes this from no mannequin!
[after Emmy, as a mannequin, has flipped off him and Mr. Richards]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning Family History of Insanity
Jonathan Switcher
Mom, lemme ask you, did I ever do anything really strange as a child? Is there any history of insanity in the family?
[on the phone]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
An Artist's Unique Connection to Their Work
Jonathan Switcher
I must be losing my mind. I guess all artists fall in love with their work, but you just seem so special.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Store Dignity and Arrogance in Conflict
Mr. Richards
What arrogance! That worm of a stock boy has created an affront to the dignity of this store. I'll have it taken down immediately and make sure that lunatic never works in this town again.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Temptation of Jelly Doughnuts
Hollywood Montrose
Diets don't work! It's those jelly doughnuts. They call to me in the middle of the night: "Hollywood! Hollywood! Come and get me, Hollywood!" I can't stay away from them. It's like you and women's dressing rooms.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Appreciation for Craftsmanship and Connection
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
You've got good hands. I liked the way they felt when you were putting me together.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Celebrating the Charm of Hollywood
Hollywood Montrose
Hollywood. Hollywood Montrose. Ooh! Doesn't it just sing!
[introducing himself]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Special Night at the Store
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
Tonight, we're gonna do something special, something that this store has never seen before!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Fear of Night Workers
Mr. Richards
You people that work at night scare me.
[to Felix]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Disappointment of Reality in Work Life
Jonathan
This job at Illustra is destroying your sense of humor. You gotta quit.
[serious]
Roxie
I'm not the one who can't deal with reality.
Jonathan
Reality is very disappointing.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Critique of a Window Display's Reception
Mr. Richards
We would all love to know what possessed Switcher to create such a window display. Did you see those crowds gaping on the sidewalks? It's an embarrassment!
[at the board room]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Seeking Professional Help and Misunderstandings
Roxie
I think you should see a professional.
Jonathan
A professional? What do you mean, a hooker?
Roxie
No, I mean a psychiatrist.
Jonathan
I can't afford a psychiatrist.
Roxie
Then call one of those shrinks on the radio.
Jonathan
A radio shrink? They're only good for people with problems that fit between the commercials.
Roxie
Good night, Jonathan.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Joy of Creative Inspiration
Jonathan Switcher
It's you! I wanted to take you home, but they wouldn't let me. You know you're the first thing I've created in a really long time that made me feel like an artist.
[seeing Mannequin Emmy in a store window]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Dismissive Departure from Employment
Jonathan Switcher
I'm fired, pick up my paycheck on the way out, never come back...
[to his boss]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Recognition in a Mannequin Factory
Mannequin Factory Boss
You know, you could get the dummy of the week award, Switcher.
Jonathan
She turned out pretty good, didn't she?
Mannequin Factory Boss
I wasn't talking about her.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Country Girl's Admiration for Creativity
Hollywood Montrose
It's obvious to this country girl that you're an A-number one creative freak. Imagine pretending you're a stock boy when you're a major artiste. I am so jealous.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Finding a Place of Belonging
Jonathan Switcher
I'm not the same guy I used to be. I finally found a place where I belong.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Desire for Freedom and Change
Emmy
Mother, I don't want to settle down. I want to do things, I want to invent things, I want to try things that nobody's ever tried before... I want to fly.
Emmy's Mother
Sure and I want to smoke and tell your father to go to hell! Emmy, if I thought we women could any way change anything, don't you think I'd encourage you?
[sarcastic]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Unique Perspective on Body Image
Hollywood Montrose
At least, she'll never tell you that your hips are too fat.
[to Jonathan]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Introducing Ema Hesire, Also Known as Emmy
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
My name is Ema Hesire, but you can call me Emmy.
[introducing herself]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Support in the Face of Adversity
Hollywood Montrose
Rumor Control has it that the board wants to fire your little behind. You let me in there at those so-and-sos. I'll straighten them out, tout de suite. How can they think of firing you?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Trusting a Vegetable with My Future
Mr. Richards
I've put my future in the hands of a vegetable.
[to himself]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Seeking Creative Inspiration from a Muse
Hollywood Montrose
You know I would never bother you when you're getting a piece of wood, but this is muy importante. Your Hollywood needs help. I need your creative muse.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Seeking Guidance in Despair
Ema "Emmy" Hesire
Mother, there's got to be a better way. Please, gods. Please help me find it.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Charmed Life and Unrecognized Sacrifice
Mr. Richards
Well, you must lead a charmed life. It was all I could do to save your skin in there. No thanks are necessary, Switcher!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Company in the Workplace
Hollywood
I am so glad you're working here!
Jonathan
You are?
[surprised]
Hollywood
Well, of course I am, darling. I never thought they would hire anyone stranger than me.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.