Name: Men in Black II
Genre: Action, Comedy, Science Fiction
Released: 2002-07-03
Duration: 88 min
Rating: 6.4
Cast: Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Rip Torn, Lara Flynn Boyle, Johnny Knoxville

Men in Black II

A Character's Hunger for Prey

Serleena Oh, yummy. Someone I need to eat.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Communicator Exchange and Character Clarification

Agent J Here's my communicator, in case you need it.

[J is hiding Laura at the Worms' place]

Worms Whooooh! Nice move.

[Laura kisses Jay]

Agent J Okay. Uh... just... watch out for Neeble.

Laura Which one's Neeble?

Agent J Um... err... which one o y'all's Neeble?

Neeble Yo, mama!

[in the hot tub]

Mannix Oy, Neeble.

Agent J Ah, there ya go. And... uh... don't fall asleep.

Worms Twister!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Communication Breakdown in Men in Black II

Agent J Man, tell it to the hand.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Urban Ignorance During a Subway Emergency Drill

Agent J The City of New York would like to thank you for participating in our drill. Had this been an actual emergency, y'all woulda been eaten. Cause you don't listen. You're ignorant. How a man gon come bashin thru a subway when — That's the problem with all y'all New Yorkers. "Oh, we seen it all." "Oh, no! A 600 ft. ]! Save us, Mr. Black Man!" And I come in, I ask ya nice, move to the next car! Y'all just sit there like... Thank you for participating in our drill. Hopefully you enjoyed our new, smaller, more energy-efficient subway cars. Watch your step, you all have a nice evening.

[J has just saved a whole subway of passengers from being eaten alive by Jeff, the giant worm-like alien, who chewed off about 98% of the subway train before retreating; ''Neuralizes subway passengers''; feigning fear; [worm; ''Neuralizes subway passengers again, regains his composure''; ''walks off, neuralizing Capt. Bridgewater in the process'']

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Agent K's Reflections on City Life

Agent K It's nice. Sleep late on the weekends. Watch the Weather Channel. I did miss this city.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Desire for Power and Control

Serleena Silly little planet. I could rule the place with the right set of mammary glands.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Unexpected Reunion in a Comedic Exchange

Frank ]"] "... and I learned to get along, and so you're back from outer space, I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face, I should have changed that stupid lock, I should have made you leave your key, if I had known for just one second you'd be back to bother me, go on, now go, walk out the door...

[singing "[[w:I Will Survive|I Will Survive]

Agent J Frank! Bring your head in this window before I roll it up in there.

Frank Got it!

[Sits further away from the window; Starts humming the melody, looking anxiously out the window]

Agent J FRANK!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Michael Jackson Inquires About Men in Black Role

Zed How'd it go?

Michael Jackson Drolacks are gone and the treaty is signed.

Zed Good work.

Michael Jackson Zed? What about that position you promised me in Men in Black?

Zed Still working on the Alien Affirmative Action Program, I'll keep you posted.

Michael Jackson Wait a minute, that's not what you promised me!

Zed You're– you're breaking up!

Michael Jackson Zed? Hello? I could be Agent M!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Ready to Take Action Against Adversaries

Agent J About to lay the smack-down on your candy ass! (In homage to ])

[[w:Dwayne Johnson|The Rock]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Skepticism About Aliens and Men in Black

Agent J Oh, and there ain't no such thing as aliens or Men in Black.

[After K calls for him to leave, to Newton and Hailey]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Unusual Customs Inquiry in Men in Black II

MIB Customs Agent Any fruit or vegetables?

Serleena Yeah, two heads of cabbage.

[motioning towards Scrad]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Good cop, dumb dog strategy suggested

Agent J How about we do the good cop, dumb dog thing, and you just shut up?

[after Frank the Pug suggests the "good cop, bad cop thing"]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

The Scum's Turn in the Universe

Serleena Prisoners of MIB. The scum of the universe. Well, now it's the scum's turn.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Cherishing Moments in Unusual Circumstances

Agent K You did not see a room full of shiny weapons. You did not see four alien nightcrawlers. You will cherish and love each other for the rest of your lives.

Agent J Which could be the next 27 or 28 minutes, so y’all should get to lovin’ and cherishin’. Oh, and she can stay up late as she want and have cookies and candy and cake and junk and stuff.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Agent J's Unconventional Life Advice

Agent J Okay, first, get some contact lenses, ‘cause joints look like they can pick up cable. Second, take her to Cambodia. Get her a lobster dinner. Pay more than a dollar. Third, the second y'all get back from Cambodia... move your bum ass out of your mom's house. Boy, you like forty years old.

[After neuralizing Newton and Hailey]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

The Consequences of Winning and Losing

Serleena Here's the deal. I lose, you lose. I win, everything keeps spinning.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Curiosity About Life Beyond Routine

Agent J So what's it like on the outside? Not doin’ this every day?

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Standard Features and Unexpected Experiences

Agent K Does that come standard?

Agent J Actually it came wit a black dude, but he kept gettin’ pulled over.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Agent K's Unlikely Experience Inquiry

Agent K I never worked in a funeral home. Somethin’ I can do for you, Slick?

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Driving Memories in Men in Black II

Agent J Wait, what are you doing?

Agent K I always did the driving.

Agent J Oh, no.

Agent K I remember that.

Agent J No, what you remember is that you used to drive that old busted jawn (referring to the ]). See, I drive the new hotness (referring to the ]). Old and busted. New hotness. Old, busted hotness.

[[w:Ford LTD Crown Victoria|Crown Victoria; [w:Mercedes-Benz|Mercedes; points at Kay; points at himself; K looks at J for a second, then J hands the keys over]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Men in Black II

Agent J Expresses Frustration to Jeff

Agent J Jeff, I am so not in the mood for you! Get back in the subway! Right now!

Men in Black II

Character Description of Serleena

Serleena So feisty.

Men in Black II

Emergency Evacuation Order by Agent K

Agent K Get a mop, and escort all civilian personnel from this site immediately.

[After coffee has been spilt at the post office.]

Men in Black II

Unexpected Events and Their Impact on Life

Laura An hour ago, a man I've known my whole life vanished in front of my eyes because of a woman with things coming out of her fingers and a two-headed guy with the IQ of a cannoli. So yeah, everything's okay.

Men in Black II

Agent J Comments on New Partner's Intelligence

Agent J Jeff, excuse my partner. He's new and he's... ...kinda stupid.

[Jeff attacks T]

Men in Black II

Urgent Warning About Electrical System Bug

Agent J Transit Authority, people! We need to move to the forward car, there's a bug in the electrical system. Yo! People! We got a bug in the electrical system!

[passengers ignore him]

Men in Black II

The Innocence of Belief in the Unknown

Laura When we're kids, before we're taught how to think, or what to believe, our hearts tell us there is something else out there. I know what I saw. You tell me what I'm supposed to believe.

Men in Black II

Agent J's Disgusting Observation

Agent J That's just nasty.

[after seeing the Grand Central Station Locker Creatures’ ”large adult entertainment section”]

Men in Black II

A Playful Farewell from Agent J

Agent J Sweet dreams, big boy!

[to Jeff]

Men in Black II

The Secret Operations of the Men in Black

Peter Graves Although no one has ever been able to prove their existence, a quasi-government agency known as the Men in Black supposedly carries out secret operations here on earth in order to keep us safe from aliens throughout the galaxies. Here is one of their stories that "never happened" from one of their files that "doesn’t exist".

Frank the Pug (upon seeing Ben's skin only) Hey, J, zero percent body fat! (Homage to ].)

[[w:Lara Flynn Boyle|Lara Flynn Boyle]

Worms Once you've had ], that’s what you'll yearn!

[[worm]

Grand Central Station Locker Creatures K is back! The light keeper! All hail K! All hail K! Oh, K, can you see by the dawn's early light...

Jeebs (head is growing back after J shot it off) Oh, great, right in the pie-hole! Now nuttin’s gonna taste right!

MIB Guard It's about time you guys got here. That pretty lady in there is causin’ all kinds-a-hell.

[after J and K come to stop Serleena, he's reading a tabloid that says "Satan Escapes from Hell."]

Men in Black II

Agent J's Response to a Quirky Request

Agent J Yeah, every Saturday night you'd be like, "Flush me J., Flush me." and I'd be like, "Naw.

Men in Black II Quotes

find it. watch it.