Multiple Maniacs Quotes

Lady Divine Oh, but I don't even know your name!

Mink It's Mink, but lots of people just call me The Religious Whore.

Mink I usually sleep in churches, you know, in the confessionals. They lock all the churches up at night now because of all the thieves and they never check the confessionals. Saturday nights are the only problem, and nights that are holy days because of early masses the next day. And Lent, shit, forget it, I gotta hang in synagogues then, and it's just not the same thing if you know what I mean.

Audience Member She's a dyke! Look at those tattoos.

Bonnie Oh Mr. David, this is even better than amyl nitrate. It's better than Carvada. It's even better than heroin! Oh Jesus, this is even better than last time! if only we could perform acts 24 hours a day! Oh, that would be supreme happiness.

Cookie You've driven me from my own home!

Mr. David What ugly children they have!

Lady Divine If it wasn't for me you'd still be back in Boston doing poodle-nappings from those old bitches.

Lady Divine I was in agony! I had been raped before but never in such an unnatural and brutal way!

Lady Divine Go fix yourself a sandwich!

Ricky Is there any bologna in there?

Lady Divine And some cheese. Anything you want, just you know go ahead and fix yourself a sandwich!

Bonnie Mr. David, I have to see you again! I want to perform acts with you! Now!

Mr. David You know that's impossible.

Bonnie Oh please, please! Oh, god! God damnit!

Lady Divine It was then that I realized that she was using her rosary as a tool of erotic pleasure! She made me get into a kneeling position. My head was spinning. And all at once, she inserted her rosary into one of my most private parts!

Mink Isn't there anybody else we could do it on? I mean...

Lady Divine There's nobody left! Nobody!

Mink We could find someone!

Lady Divine Who, but who?!

Mink God, there are hundreds of people I have in my fantasies! Ann Margaret, Patricia Nixon, Shirley Temple, the Pope!

Lady Divine Oh Mink, we could go on for days! Oh it would be wonderful! ] and his family, the entire Baltimore police force, and ]!

Mr. David Yes folks, this isn't any cheap X-rated movie or any 5th rate porno play, this is the show you want! Lady Divine's cavalcade of perversions, the sleaziest show on earth! Not actors, not paid impostors, but real actual filth who have been carefully screened in order to present to you the most flagrant violation of natural law known to man! These assorted sluts, fags, dykes and pimps know no bounds! They have commited acts against God and nature, acts that by their mere existence would make any decent person recoil in disgust!

Mink Oh, Jesus, you're my first celebrity I ever gave a rosary job to! And at St. Cecilia's, oh, wow, imagine!

Mr. David So you finally turned dyke, well, I'm not surprised!

Lady Divine DYKE!? Look who's talking, all peroxided up!

Bonnie No one has been near my private parts... except for this old lady I met on the bus.

Mr. David You've been lying all long.

Bonnie Oh no, no I haven't Mr. David. It was just she was so old I felt bad for her. I only let her... well, you know. It was no big production or anything, it was on the bus and all.

Lady Divine And how about you, Mr. Angel? How about your being an accomplice and how about Sharon Tate? How about that!

Mr. David I told you to never mention that again!

Lady Divine How dare you contaminate my dressing room with this little piece of filth!

Mr. David She is not! She's an auto-erotic acomprophasiac and a gerontophiliac and I just thought you might be interested in her for the show, that's all.

Bonnie Yes and I can start immediately. I have this great act all worked out, with this great old man in his late 70s and his mirror, well, actually he's my --

Lady Divine Oh!

Bonnie ...and we used to have kind of a thing together, and I heard about this show and I thought what an ideal setup, I mean!

Lady Divine Get her out! Get her out of here! How can you flaunt your cheap little one-night-stands in my face, especially at a time like this!

Lady Divine Ricky! Ricky! Bring me something strong, something I can get off on!

Bonnie Mr. David, am I better than Lady Divine?

Mr. David Different. Just completely different.