32 quotes
The Appeal of Poetic Charm
Aidan
That’s why chicks dig you out, man. They love this freaky poetic crap.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Love and Distance in Family Relationships
Caroline
Why do you think dad doesn’t want to, like listen to me?
Tyler
Dad loves you.
Caroline
So, you can love someone and not want to spend time with them.
Tyler
Yeah, you got that right.
Caroline
Mom loves aunt Sara, but at christmas last year she wouldn't let Les leave them in a room together. She said that there'll be a "Yuletide homicide".
Tyler
That's cause aunt Sara drinks. You don't drink, do you?
Caroline
I'm eleven.
Tyler
So why would anyone ever wanna avoid you?
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Interventions and Binge Drinking Don't Mix
Tyler
You do know that interventions typically don't involve binge drinking?
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Impact of Our Touch on Others
From trailers and tv spots
(voiceover) If I knew you could hear me I would say, Our fingerprints don't fade from the lives we touch.
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The Importance of Individual Actions in Life
From trailers and tv spots
(voiceover) ] said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it, cause nobody else will.
[[Gandhi]
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Confronting a Friend's Withdrawal
Aidan
You’ve been a ghost past couple weeks, alright? You don’t want to go out anymore. I’ve had enough of this introvert shit, ok? I’m ready to set up an intervention here!
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Searching for Information Amidst Distractions
Ally
Sorry, I fell asleep.
Neil Craig
Asleep. Where?
Ally
(sigh) my phone died. Hey that’s mine! That’s from my desk.
Neil Craig
I was trying to find some information.
Ally
Oh, What I’m now one of yours suspects?
Neil Craig
When you act like one.
Ally
Oh for God’s sake.
Neil Craig
Don’t use that tone with me, Ally! I smell alcohol.
Ally
Yeah, so do I.
Neil Craig
That supposed to mean something? What’s going on here, Ally? Trying to tell me something with this? You are all grown up now?
Ally
Maybe it’s time you get use to it dad, before you give yourself a heart attack.
Neil Craig
Who is the guy?
Ally
What makes you think there is a guy?
Neil Craig
Yeah, he is a real prince. He gets you drunk. Send you home smelling like a brewery , smelling like god knows what. You sure can pick em!
Ally
Yeah, I take after my mother.
Ally
I’m not a child!
Neil Craig
In this house, you are!
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Father-Son Tensions Over Responsibility and Independence
Charles Hawkins
You could do worse than have a father who bails you out of jail.
Tyler
I don’t want to be bailed out of anything. I just wanted you to know that I didn’t call you.
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Unexpected Connections in Tense Confrontation
Aidan
He has got a daughter!
Tyler
Who's got a daughter?
Aidan
The cop that busted your face all up! He’s got a daughter!
Tyler
What do you want me to do? Kidnap her?
Aidan
We don't have the closet space for that! Just introduce yourself, go on a few dates. Be you charming gentlemanly self, and then flip the script on her.
Tyler
What's flip the script?
Aidan
Screw her brains out. Make her call you daddy! I don't know. Steal her panties and sell them on ebay or put them up on her high school's website. I don't know, just be creative.
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Security Guard Addresses Hawkins on Duty
Security Guard
Hawkins! You posted!
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Aidan's Observation on Love and Connection
Aidan
He's in love with you. I've only ever seen him look at one other girl the way he looks at you, and she's a lot shorter and shares his DNA.
[to Ally]
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Expectation vs. Reality in Absence
Neil Craig
She’s supposed to be back. She is not back.
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Conflicted Feelings About Love and Commitment
From trailers and tv spots
(voiceover) Someone comes into your life and half of you says, You're nowhere near ready. And the other half says, Make her yours forever
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Winning or Cheating: A Debate Unfolds
Ally
I don’t know what are you smiling about.
Tyler
I won!
Ally
Paying off the attendant it’s not winning, it’s cheating. By the way, when the hell were you gonna tell me what happened to your face?
Tyler
I got into a bar fight.
Tyler
Do you want to go out for a beer or something? Oh wait you're not old enough..
Ally
I'm 21..
Tyler
No you're not.. Did you lie?
Ally
I was trying to get rid of you.
Tyler
That hurts, I'm wounded.
Ally
Well, it's getting pretty late so...
Tyler
I'll walk you to the subway.
Ally
I'll take a cab. I never take the subway anymore.
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The Importance of Love and Forgiveness
From the movie
(voiceover) Whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it cause nobody else will. Like when someone comes into your life and half of you says: "You're nowhere near ready". And the other half says: "Make her yours forever". Michael, Caroline asked me what would I say if I knew you could hear me. I said: "I do know. I love you. God, I miss you, and I forgive you".
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Critique of Clichéd Romantic Tropes
Tyler
What?
Ally
So this is the whole playful you-got-me-all-wet part, right?
Tyler
Why make it sound cheap.
Ally
It is cheap. I’ve seen this scene a hundred times. You know – you know what never happens in these scene? Tyler who doesn’t really go to school? Tyler doesn’t really care about his job.
Tyler
Hum?
Ally
No? (she turns over him a pot full of water) That.
Tyler
You! You better apologize!
Ally
Never!
Tyler
Apologize!
Ally
Your middle name is Keats, god, your parents are pretentious as hell.
Tyler
You better apologize!
Ally
Never!
Tyler
Apologize!
Ally
I rather eat monkeys.
Tyler
Oh God. Not in the plans. Not in the plans. I surr... I surrender, geeze you're relentless.
Ally
Victory at all costs.
Tyler
Oh man, Now I'm pissed. (Gets out cigarette)
Ally
You should quit anyway.
Tyler
Why is that? Are cigarettes bad for you or something?
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Going Out With a Friend
Ally
I’m going out.
Neil Craig
Who’re you going with?
Ally
A boy from school.
Neil Craig
Okay.
Ally
I wasn't asking for permission.
Neil Craig
I know that, just be careful.
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Coasters and Family Resemblance in Conversation
Tyler
I know. We live like pigs. But, I do have a coaster, if you want a coaster.
Ally
Ah, don't do coasters til the third date. Hey who's that?
Tyler
That's Michael. That's my brother.
Ally
He Kinda looks like you. Does he play around here?
Tyler
Not anymore.
Ally
Do you play?
Tyler
Well it depends who you ask. It's turns out you need talent.
Ally
So what talents do you actually possess?
Ally
What is that?
Tyler
This is our appetizer. It used to say "In case of astroid," but Aiden, my roommate, got high and I was in the shower.. so..
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Questioning the Last Drink
Tyler
When was the last time you had one drink?
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A Father's Responsibility and Understanding
Ally
My dad, he needs to take care of people. He just doesn’t understand.. or.. doesn't know what’s going on right now.
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Confusion Over Smoking Policies and Decor
Receptionist
You know you can’t smoke in here.
Tyler
Why – Why do you have an ashtray?
Receptionist
It’s a bowl, it completes the room.
Tyler
This is a bowl? Hum I’m sorry.
Janine
Tyler!
Tyler
Guess it was just here to tease me.
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A Request for Help in Conversation
Tyler
Excuse me. Can I bother you for a second?
Ally
You’re already bothering me.
Tyler
Listen, I’m doing this sociological experiment, and I was just wondering if you could help me out for a second.
Ally
You're kidding right?
Tyler
Can I ask your name?
Ally
Anonymous..
Tyler
Anonymous? Is that Greek? Ok, anonymous, do you see that guy sitting over there pretending to read a textbook looking in this general direction?
Ally
Yeah, staring at us? Subtle.
Tyler
See I have this theory that an objective third party such as yourself can determine how much of an asshole he is by just looking at him. See, I'm his roommate and I think that I have witnessed too many glaring examples of assoholic behaviour that I'm biased as a subject. But I'm convinced that he has an aura that you can actually perceive.
Ally
Who else do you plan on asking?
Tyler
I don’t know. I don’t think anybody else here fits the criteria. Attractive blonde, early twenties, female.
Ally
Ah! Nineteen, so..
Tyler
Nineteen...That's fine. Teens. I can do teens. Well, typically you get something for being involved in one of these surveys, I - I ran out of my foam fingers a while back so, I don’t know, can I take you out to dinner or something? Maybe just a conversation on the off chance that one of us says something interesting?
Ally
Yeah, there is a problem there, ‘cause I don’t date sociology majors.
Tyler
Lucky for you I’m undecided
Ally
About what?
Tyler
Everything.
Ally
I’m Ally.
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Ambitions Beyond a Quiet Life with Books
Aidan
It must be nice living at the bookstore, by yourself, with all your stacks of books. But, you see, I actually plan on having a career, and a wife, and a girlfriend, and a... and a divorce, and a mid-life stalking episode, and an erectile dysfunction.
[In jail]
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Ordering Food at a Restaurant
Ally
What deserts do you have?
Restaurant Waiter
Mango ice cream with nuts and raisins.
Ally
Great. Hum, I’ll have that and a glass of skim milk and then the lamb vindaloo. Thanks.
Tyler
Oh can I have a chicken tikka masala and a kingfisher please?
Ally
I have my dessert first.
Tyler
Is that a political statement or a medical condition, perhaps?
Ally
I just don’t see the point of waiting. What if I die eating my vindaloo?
Tyler
Is that probable?
Ally
It's possible. Embolism bursts, astroid hits the restaurant. I'd die without having eaten the one thing I wanted most.
Tyler
I mean, the odds.. The odds are…
Ally
Tell you what. Guarantee me, swear to me on your eternal soul that I make it through my entrée, and I’ll wait. Before you answer, If I die, you’ll have to live the rest of your life knowing that not only did you lie to me but you denied me my one last indulgence. My last wish. Are you prepared to shoulder that kind of responsibility to prove a point? Don't worry, I'll share.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Life's Connection Through Shared Experiences
From trailers and tv spots
(voiceover) This girl, her life slipped into me.
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Aidan's Offer to Steal Bikes
Aidan
You give me the word and I will steal their bikes.
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Reassurance in Uncertain Moments
Ally
It’s ok, It’s ok, It’s ok.
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Regrets and Miscommunication Among Friends
Tyler
This one of those things that I’m already regretting.
Aidan
All right, she was here the other day.
Tyler
I don't care. What do you want me to say? "Hey Doll Face your dad trampled all over my civil liberties, you wanna make out with me?
Aidan
Don't call her "Doll face". Moron.
Tyler
Look I'm leaving.
Aidan
Would you..Look, alright, there she is.
Tyler
Who?
Aidan
The Blonde.
Tyler
I know her...I don't know her, but she’s in my Global Politics class.
Aidan
There you go! Something to open up with. All right? Go get her.
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Refusal of Affection in a Moment
Ally
Thanks.
Tyler
Yeah. So.. Um.. (he tries to kiss her, she refuses).
Ally
Not tonight.
Tyler
Okay.
Ally
Not – not never, just, not tonight
Cab driver
Are we going or what?
Ally
Turn on the meter.
Tyler
Not never? So, dessert first for fear of asteroid: yes but, kissing a guy you’re seem to be attracted to, at least,before driving off into the unknown New York City night alongside a panda you only just met: no. Great. (she kisses him). Good.
Ally
You’re really weird.
Tyler
Yeah, I know..
Ally
(To taxi driver) Going to queens, don't wanna hear about it!
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Loyalty in Relationships and Family Bonds
Tyler
He can stand me up, but he can’t stand you up. And he can't stand my little sister up.
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Carnival Game Exchange for Prizes
Game Attendant
Take a shot. Three for one. One dollar. Oh! Ok! Come on, win a prize. Win a prize for the pretty lady.
Ally
Ya, I want.. I – I want the panda.
Tyler
How much do you give the panda?
Game Attendant
Three for three. Go! Oh!
Ally
Oh!
Tyler
Yeah, give me three more. If I give up, he wins.
Ally
Who? The attendant?
Tyler
The giant freaking panda!
Game Attendant
Take it easy tough guy!
Tyler
I’m sorry. Three more. Three more.
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The Significance of Life's Actions
From the movie
(voiceover) ] said that whatever you do in life will be insignificant, but it's very important that you do it. I tend to agree with the first part. Michael, you know what I'm starring at. By 22 ] had three kids, ] 30 symphonies and ] was dead. You once told me our fingerprints don't fade from the lives that we touch. Is that true for everybody? Or was it just poetic bullshit?
[[Gandhi; [Gandhi; [Mozart; [Buddy Holly]
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