Shampoo (1975) - Quotes

A Humorous Take on Unconventional Relationships

Taglines: In a town where anything goes, everything does in this funny bedroom farce.

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The Superiority of Hairdressers Explained

Taglines: Your hairdresser does it better...

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A Proposal Amidst Uncertainty and Regret

Jackie Shawn: What are you trying to do?

George Roundy: I want you to marry me. I, I want to take care of you. I, I want you to have a baby with me. Hey, I know I'm a fuck up, but I'll take care of you. I'll make you happy. I swear to God I will.

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The Importance of Customer Relationships in Business

George Roundy: I don't know where a financial statement is. I got the heads. All right? The heads, the customers. They come to me. I'm the one they want. If I open a shop, they're gonna leave and they're gonna come to me. You'd be surprised. I got a lot of heads.

Mr. Pettis: I'm sure you do.

George Roundy: I - you don't know what I'm talking about, do you?

Mr. Pettis: No, I don't know.

George Roundy: How do you expect to lend me money if you don't know the first thing about my business?

Mr. Pettis: I don't. Good morning, Mr. Roundy.

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The Complexity of Happiness and Commitment

Jackie Shawn: Do you know why I used to get angry with you?

George Roundy: I wouldn't settle down.

Jackie Shawn: Cause you're always so happy - about everything.

George Roundy: I was?

Jackie Shawn: I found it rather unrealistic.

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Party Conversations on Social Responsibility

Lester Karpf: Felicia, this party involves more than you and me, you know. These people here are concerned about more than each other.

Felicia Karpf: Is that right?

Lester Karpf: Yes! That's right. Some of us are trying to make this country be a better place to live in. Believe it or not.

Felicia Karpf: Is that what this is all about? To make this country a better place to live in?

Lester Karpf: Yes, that's what this is all about. It's a beautiful thing to see.

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A Conversation on Seriousness and Relationships

Jackie Shawn: Are you really serious about the shop?

George Roundy: Are you serious about Lester?

Jackie Shawn: I asked you first.

George Roundy: Well, I'm never serious about anything.

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Unexpected Late-Night Hair Transformation

Jill Haynes: You know what George did the other night? He wakes me up at 2 o'clock in the morning, just to do my hair.

Jackie Shawn: Why?

Jill Haynes: I don't know! I don't know. He just woke me up and he said, "Come on, get up, I'm gonna make you the grooviest looking chick in this town.

Jackie Shawn: So, what did you do?

Jill Haynes: Well, I looked at him and I said, "George, if you love me, I am the grooviest little chick in this town.

Jackie Shawn: Did he cut your hair?

Jill Haynes: No. We didn't get around to that.

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Fear of Future Relationships

George Roundy: Last night I had a dream. I was 50 years old and I was supposed to meet Jill at the shop. It scared the hell out of me.

Jackie Shawn: Why?

George Roundy: I can't imagine being with Jill when I'm 50 years old. I can't imagine not being with you.

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Uncertainty in Relationships and Communication

Jackie Shawn: What about Felicia?

George Roundy: What about her?

Jackie Shawn: Did you?

George Roundy: Did I what?

Jackie Shawn: Come on. Oh, I just can't wait to see Lester with me and the cunt in the same room tonight.

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The Challenge of Maturity in Relationships

George Roundy: Jill, I'm trying to get things moving.

Jill Haynes: Oh, grow up! You never stop moving! You never go anywhere! Grow up! Grow up - grow up!

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Exploring Sexual Experiences Across Genders

Lorna Karpf: Have you ever made it with a guy?

George Roundy: Have you ever made it with a girl?

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Questioning George's Sexuality in Shampoo

Lester Karpf: Do you think George is a fairy?

Felicia Karpf: Who?

Lester Karpf: The kid, the hairdresser.

Felicia Karpf: Well, I don't know for sure. He is a hairdresser, though.

Lester Karpf: Maybe he's just a kooky guy who likes to do kooky things.

Felicia Karpf: Maybe. Why do you ask?

Lester Karpf: I'm thinking of investing with him. He worries me.

Felicia Karpf: Why?

Lester Karpf: Well, maybe he's too flighty and irresponsible. That's why I asked if he was a fairy.

Felicia: I don't know. He's a hairdresser.

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Desire and Power in a Conversation

Jackie Shawn: You must be a very important executive.

Sid Roth: Well, whatever I am, I could get you whatever you want.

Jackie Shawn: [points to George] Hm? Well, what I really want is to suck his cock.

Complicated Friendship Dynamics

George Roundy: Can't we just, eh, be friends?

Lorna Karpf: [pause] Okay. You wanna fuck?

Confronting Stereotypes in Beverly Hills

Lorna Karpf: Beverly Hills hairdresser. You might as well be a faggot.

Existential Doubts in a Material World

Lester Karpf: [[Lyndon Johnson; [Richard Nixon|Nixon] I just wish I knew what the hell I was living for. You can lose it all, you know. I mean, you can lose it no matter who you are. What's the sense of having it all. Market went down 10 points last week. God damn, ]. Well, maybe ] will be better. What's the difference. They're all a bunch of jerks.

Defining Moments of Passion

Lester Karpf: That's what I call fucking! Am I right or am I right?

Critique of Selfish Behavior and Relationships

Felicia Karpf: Oh god, Lester you are a miserable human being. You're not helping anybody! You're just twisting arms here for a lot of silly sons of bitches who are all out for themselves. You're kidding yourself if you think your new business partner is going to keep his hands off your girl. Or if she's going to keep her hands off of him!

Cosmopolitan's Take on Parenthood and Age

Jill Haynes: You know what I read in Cosmopolitan? That if you don't have a baby before you're 30, you're going to have a Mongolian idiot.

Questioning Greatness in a Provocative Manner

Jackie Shawn: [being pushed away by George during a dinner party] C'mon, who's the greatest cocksucker in the whole world?

Confusion About Love and Relationships

George Roundy: Maybe it means I don't love them. Maybe it means I don't love you, I don't know. No one's going to tell me that I don't like them.

Complicated Relationships and Perceptions of Desire

George Roundy: [explaining to Lester why he had sex with his wife, mistress and daughter] Face it, they know we're always trying to nail em and they don't like it. They like it and they don't like, it's got nothing to do with you Lester. It just happened.

Fun Over Profit in Relationships

George Roundy: I don't fuck anybody for money. I do it for the fun.

A Confession of Attraction and Desire

George Roundy: Let's face it, I fucked em all. I mean, that's what I do. That's why I went to beauty school. I mean, they're always there and I-I just can't I-I, you know, I - I don't know what I'm apologizing for. So, sometimes I fuck em. I go into that shop and they're so great lookin', you know, and I - I doing their hair and they feel great and they smell great. Or, I could be out on the street, you know, and I could just stop at a stoplight or go into an elevator or - I - it's a beautiful girl - I - I don't know - I mean, that's it! It makes my day. I mean, it makes me feel like I'm gonna live forever.