26 quotes
Reflecting on Life and Memories
Adult Joe Wenteworth
Into paradise...may the angels lead you.
[Presses his hand against Simon's tombstone]
Simon Wenteworth
Dad. Dad! I'd love to stand around in the graveyard all day, but I got a game. Remember?
Adult Joe Wenteworth
Okay, Simon. I'm coming. You know, I was just thinking about that. Last year, you played in the squirt league, right?
Simon Wenteworth
Yeah.
Adult Joe Wenteworth
This year, it's Pee-Wee.
Simon Wenteworth
So?
Adult Joe Wenteworth
So what do they want you to do? Play soccer, or urinate? Anyway, I was just thinking.
[Sees that Simon doesn't get it]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Faith Beyond Physical Spaces
Rev. Russell
Simon, what do you think you're doing sitting in a corner?
Simon Birch
Thinking about God.
Rev. Russell
In a corner?
Simon Birch
Faith is not in a floor plan.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dress Rehearsal Confusion in Simon Birch
Miss Leavey
Okay, is everybody ready for dress rehearsal?
Simon Birch
No.
Miss Leavey
What now, Simon?
Simon Birch
What are those?
[Points to the turtledove costumes, which look like winged mutant turtles]
Miss Leavey
They're turtledoves.
Simon Birch
They look like they're from outer space! The audience won't know what they are!
Miss Leavey
They're doves, Simon! The audience knows what a dove is!
Simon Birch
They're giant doves! They're as big as half a donkey. They're actually kind of frightening.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Reflection on Past Experiences
Simon Birch
I was just thinking.
Joe Wenteworth
Yeah?
Simon Birch
Last year we played in the Squirt League, right?
Joe Wenteworth
Uh-huh.
Simon Birch
And this year we're in the Peewees.
Joe Wenteworth
So?
Simon Birch
Do they want us to play baseball or urinate? Anyway, I was just thinking.
[silence]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Unpredictable Nature of Time
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
Time is a monster that cannot be reasoned with. It responds like a snail to our impatience...then it races like a gazelle when you can't catch your breath.
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A Life Transformed Through Loss and Love
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
Winter left its icy chill behind and soon it was spring, then summer again. Grandmother passed away that June following a stroke. And because Hilde was always so content to just follow her lead...she had a stroke of her own and died in July. We buried them side by side. It's the way they would've wanted it. Ben Goodrich legally adopted me just two days before my thirteenth birthday. Not a day goes by that I don't thank God for bringing him into my life. With Simon's help, I had finally found my real father.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Reflections on Christmas Pageants
Rev. Russell
Congratulations, Simon. You've just made our first full-contact Christmas pageant. Well, do you have anything to say?
Simon Birch
Can I have my baseball cards back?
Rev. Russell
No, you may not! Oh, Simon. What happened to tonight?
[Sighs, recomposes himself]
Simon Birch
I don't know. Sex makes people crazy.
Rev. Russell
Well, um... that maybe true. But that is still no answer. Simon, you spend more time downstairs alone in a corner than you do with the other children. You frighten them with your stories of being an instrument of God.
Simon Birch
They're not stories.
Rev. Russell
And, you interrupt my sermons, and you refuse to apologize. I'm out of ideas, Simon. I can't talk to your parents because, well, they don't attend church. And I can't talk to Rebecca, because, well...Simon, I think what I'm trying to say is, well, we all need a break from you. So, once this all simmers down, and Marjorie Albright's father decides to accept your apology, we'll discuss letting you back.
Simon Birch
What about the retreat?
Rev. Russell
Joe will go alone. And it's about time I had a talk with him too. Simon, I'm sorry. But, as the Bible says, "There is severe discipline for him who forsakes the way.
Simon Birch
To impose a fine on a righteous man is not good; to flog noble men is wrong.
Rev. Russell
Proverbs 17:26, that's very good, Simon. But, perhaps you're familiar with this one as well: "Folly is bound in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.
Simon Birch
Good sense makes a man slow to anger...
Rev. Russell
Simon...
Simon Birch
...and it is his glory to overlook an offense.
Rev. Russell
Oh, Simon. What do you want me to do? What do you want me to say?
Simon Birch
I want to know that there's a reason for things. I used to be certain, but now I'm not so sure. I want you to tell me that God has a plan for me, a plan for all of us. Please.
Rev. Russell
Simon...I can't.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussion of Church Activities and Beliefs
Rev. Russell
I'd like to take a few minutes to discuss some of the upcoming activities on the church calendar.
Simon Birch
Here we go.
Ben Goodrich
What's wrong, Simon?
[Quietly]
Simon Birch
Who knows what God thinks about current events?
Rev. Russell
Does someone have a question?
Ben Goodrich
Uh, no, sir - um, your honor, no,...Father, thank you. No, sir.
Rev. Russell
It's always nice to see new faces in the congregation. I'd like to invite them downstairs to join my wife and children, and myself for coffee and doughnuts downstairs after the service.
Simon Birch
What does coffee and doughnuts have to do with God?
Grandmother Wenteworth
Simon, you better be quiet!
[Quietly]
Rev. Russell
Simon, is there something you'd like to share with us?
Simon Birch
I said, "What does coffee and doughnuts have to do with God?
Rev. Russell
They're merely refreshments so people can socialize and, uh, and discuss the upcoming activities.
Simon Birch
Who ever said the church needs a continental breakfast?
Rev. Russell
-Simon!
Simon Birch
I doubt that God is interested in our church activities.
Rev. Russell
-Simon!
Simon Birch
-If God has made the church bake sale a priority, then I'd say we're all in a lot of trouble.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Belief Through Memory of a Childhood Friend
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
I am doomed to remember a boy with a wrecked voice, not because of his voice or because he was the smallest person I ever knew, or even because he was the instrument of my mother's death but because he is the reason I believe in God. What faith I have, I owe it to Simon Birch, a boy I grew up with in Gravestown, Maine. It is Simon who had me a believer.
[Visiting Simon's grave.]
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Unexpected Discovery of a Horse
Joe Wenteworth
What is it?
Simon Birch
Ah! It's a horse.
[Upon seeing a dog]
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Clarifying Perspectives on Time and Responsibility
Joe Wenteworth
Come on. We're late.
Simon Birch
No, you're late. I'm just riding with you.
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Determination to Protect Others
Simon Birch
Stop it! I'm not going to let anything happen to any of you, understand?
[on the bus that plunged into a lake; Everyone looks around]
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The Gradual Loss of a Loved One
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
When someone you love dies, you don't lose them all at once. You lose them in pieces over time, like how the mail stops coming. What I remember most to this day was my mother's scent and how I hated it when it began to disappear. First from her closets and drawers, then from her dresses that she had sewed herself and finally, from her bedsheets and pillowcases.
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Challenge of Belonging in Faith and Community
Miss Leavey
Didn't your mother ever tell you to keep quiet during mass? What am I saying? Of course she didn't. Your parents don't go to church, do they, Simon? That's because they don't belong here, Simon. And neither do you. Speaking out of turn, disrupting the class, saying that God has a special plan for you? What kind of nonsense is that?
Rebecca Wenteworth
And what kind of nonsense is this?!
[Furiously bursts into the classroom, having heard the whole thing]
Miss Leavey
Hello, Rebecca...
Rebecca Wenteworth
Come on, Simon.
Miss Leavey
No, wait, I was teaching him a lesson!
Rebecca
What lessons? Humiliation?
Joe Wenteworth
Oh, man! This is so boss!
Simon Birch
This is all my fault.
Joe Wenteworth
Don't take all the credit, she's my mom.
Miss Leavey
...telling the other children that he's some kind of hero, that he's God's instrument!
Rebecca Wenteworth
And who's to say he isn't?
Joe Wenteworth
Who do you think would win in a fight?
Simon Birch
Tough say. Miss Leavey's meaner, but she's a smoker. Your mom can outlast her.
Miss Leavey
We can't have him talking that way. It frightens the other children.
Rebecca Wenteworth
Oh, I think the only one who's frightened here is you, Miss Leavey.
Miss Leavey
What? Why would I be afraid of little Simon Birch?
Rebecca Wenteworth
Because that child has more faith than you'll ever know.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Influence of Granite on Simon's Life
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
Simon's father owned the Birch Granite Company. Mr. Birch was a big believer in the rock and just about everything in their house was made from granite, including Mr. Birch.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reflections on an Uninspiring Teacher
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
Our Sunday school teacher was an unhappy woman by the name of Miss Leavey. Her name suited her perfectly as she was always leaving class.
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Tension and Humor in Unexpected Situations
Joe Wenteworth
Okay, you grabbed her boobs, and you pulled her into the manger. Big deal. It could've happened to anybody. Well, maybe not anybody.
Joe Wenteworth
Jesus, Simon, you look like shit.
[At Simon's bed in the hospital]
Rebecca Wenteworth
Do your thing, Simon! Show em how it's done!
Miss Leavey
Help. Please. I'm gonna strangle him. I swear to God I'm gonna strangle that little granite mouse if it's the last thing I do.
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Simon Birch's Remarkable Birth Record
Adult Joe Wenteworth (Narrator)
Simon Birch was the smallest delivery ever recorded in the history of Gravestown Memorial Hospital.
[At the birth scene of Simon Birch.]
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Journey to Paradise and Guidance of Angels
Simon Birch
Into paradise...may the angels...lead you.
[At Rebecca's tombstone.]
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Compliments Among Friends About Mothers
Simon Birch
Your mother has the best breasts of all the mothers.
Joe Wenteworth
Yeah.
[trying to ignore]
Simon Birch
And she smells the best too.
Joe Wenteworh
I know.
Simon Birch
She's so sexy that sometimes I forget she's someone's mother.
Joe Wenteworth
Okay. Okay.
Simon Birch
I was just being honest.
Joe Wenteworth
Well, what if I said the same thing about your mother?
Simon Birch
I'd have you committed.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unusual Observations About a Child's Voice
Grandmother Wenteworth
That child is positively unnatural.
Hilde
Most peculiar.
Grandmother Wenteworth
And his voice, like--
Hilde
A mouse.
Grandmother Wenteworth
More than one. Like mice.
Hilde
Strangled mice.
Grandmother Wenteworth
Strangled mice. Very good, Hilde.
[laughing]
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The Search for Faith and Proof
Simon Birch
Your problem is that you have no faith.
Joe Wenteworth
I got faith. I just need proof to back it up.
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A Discussion on Miracles and Patience
Simon Birch
Not so fast. Slow down. I'm a miracle, you know.
Joe Wenteworth
Yeah, yeah.
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Faith and Purpose in Personal Struggles
Simon Birch
Does God have a plan for us?
Rev. Russell
I like to think He does.
Simon Birch
-Me too. I think God made me the way I am for a reason.
Rev. Russell
Well, I'm glad that, um, that your faith, uh, helps you deal with your, um...you know, your, your condition.
Simon Birch
That's not what I mean. I think I'm God's instrument - that He's gonna use me to carry out His plan.
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Perceptions of Attractiveness Among Friends
Joe Wentworth
C'mon Si, all the girls think your cute.
Simon Birch
They think I'm cute like a baby turtle. Girls don't kiss baby turtles.
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A Father's Concern and a Friend's Defense
Mr. Birch
Simon's sick.
Joe Wenteworth
I know.
Mr. Birch
So was I when I heard what he did last night. The whole town's talkin about it. What a little screw-up.
Joe Wenteworth
Hey, your son is not a screw-up. He's a hero.
Mr. Birch
What the hell are you talkin about?
Joe Wenteworth
I said he's a hero. And you don't deserve him. I want you to know that.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.