32 quotes
A Chance for Big Bucks
Bandit
In the past, I may have done you wrong. But in the future Cletus, I will never ever do you wrong again. Right?
Snowman
Right.
Bandit
We have a chance. A big chance - to make a run, for some big bucks. Eighty thousand of them.
Snowman
Oh, really? What we gonna do, kidnap the Pope or somethin?
Bandit
How'd you guess. . No - we gotta go to Texas and pick up 400 cases of Coors. And bring em back in 28 hours.
[''Laughs'']
Snowman
Whoa. I gotta flash for you. That's called bootleggin and that's against the law.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Legend and an Out-of-Work Bum
Junior
Who's gonna hold your hat?!
[Chasing after his father, who is driving after the Bandit]
Little Enos
Well a legend and an out-of-work bum look a lot alike, Daddy!
[remarking to Big Enos about the Bandit's "legend" status]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sending the Bill to Big Enos Burdette
Cletus "The Snowman" Snow
Send... bill... to... Big... Enos... Burdette. (Trans-Am drives away) Burdette.. B... B-E-R... B-U-R... B... (Throws notepad aside) Hell, I got to go.
[Writing out note for beer]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Bold Challenge from the Bandit
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
Oh, jump me.
[Carrie is hyperly saying she wants to jump something in the car]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Loading Up for a Fun Adventure
Bandit
Hey, want a beer?
[Laughs]
Snowman
Well, son! Redneck heaven! How do we load all this stuff though?
Bandit
Hey, I'll load it on with this!
[Gets into a nearby forklift truck]
Snowman
You can't drive no forklift!
Bandit
I can drive any forkin thing around.
Snowman
Will you get serious? Can you drive this thing? Back it up!
[stands on the forks of the vehicle; Bandit drives forward]
Bandit
Oh, shut up!
[Bandit raises the forks]
Snowman
Whoa, hold it! I said BACK it up, not RAISE it up! Hold it! The beer! Watch the beer!
[Bandit reverses then drives the forklift at speed towards the boxes]
Bandit
Y'all right?
[Laughs]
Snowman
Very funny, very funny!
[Yelling from behind the cartons]
Bandit
I thought it was!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Seeking Escape and Financial Support
Bandit
We need two things, we need a way out of here, and we need the money.
[to Big Enos]
Big Enos
Well, here's my Cadillac, that will leave me with an even dozen.
Bandit
Cledus, get the money.
Snowman
Yeah, how about the money?
Little Enos
How about double or nothin?
Snowman
How about FORGETTIN it!
Bandit
Wait wait, hold it! - what was that about double or nothing?
Little Enos
You boys wanna head up to Boston, and pick up some clam chowder for me and my daddy?
Carrie
You're on!
Bandit
You're on!
[pauses]
Big Enos
In eighteen hours?
Bandit
You're still on!
[pauses further]
Snowman
Whoa, hold it... and I'm divorced!
Big Enos
Twenty to one I'll break the son of a bitch this time!
[''Smugly, as the group drives away'']
Little Enos
Gimme five hundred on the Bandit.
[''Takes a stack of bills out and starts counting'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Hat Blown Away Sparks a Reaction
Junior
Daddy, my hat blew off!
Sheriff Justice
I hope your God damn head was in it!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sheriff Justice's Warning to the Boys
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
Now, you boys just stay here and watch the car - might be some vandals around, wanna steal somethin'. So you boys just stay here and keep your hands on the car until one of my associates arrive. And don't go home. And don't go to eat. And don't play with yourself. Wouldn't look nice on my highway. You can think about it, but dooon't do it.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Disrespect for the Law Explained
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
What we're dealing with here... is a complete lack of respect for the law.
[After trying to pass Snowman and being pit maneuvered]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sheriff Justice Warns of Incoming Trouble
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
You got trouble comin'. My handle is Smokey Bear, and I'm tail-grabbin yo ass right now!
[On the CB radio, hailing the Bandit]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Frustration at Failed Road Block Encounter
Sheriff Justice
: This is Sheriff Buford T. Justice again. I've lost that Trans Am. Set up a road block.
[to the local Sheriff on the radio]
Junior
Good idea!
Sheriff Justice
What the hell would you know?!
Deputy Sheriff
Did you see that? They went right through our road block!
Sheriff Justice
You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation Between Bandit and Sheriff Justice
Bandit
Sheriff, uh, Buford T. Justice, please.
[through CB radio]
Sheriff Justice
Who there?
Bandit
This is "Bandit" Darville talkin'.
Sheriff Justice
Where are you, you sumbitch?
Bandit
Before I tell you where I am, Sheriff, there's just one thing I wanna say. You must be part coon dog. I've been chased by the best of them, and son, you make em look like they're all runnin in slow motion. I just wanna say that.
Sheriff Justice
Well, thank you, Mr. Bandit. And as the pursuer, may I say you're the goddamnedest pursuee I've ever pursued. Now that the mutual bullshit is over, where are you, you sumbitch?!
[shouting angrily]
Bandit
Well, I'm right down at the bottom of the hill, Sheriff. I'm about six-foot-eight, in a cowboy outfit, got a little pygmy standing right beside me dressed just like me. You can't miss me. 10-4.
Bandit
You know what? Scratch that. I can't lie to you, Sheriff; you're too good a man. Look over your left shoulder.
Sheriff Justice
Oof!
[looking over his shoulder, taking on a shocked expression upon seeing the Bandit]
Bandit
We're on our way to Boston to pick up some clam chowder. Bye-bye!
Sheriff Justice
I'm not givin up! I'm not givin up!
[''Shouting furiously'']
Junior
Daddy, don't leave me! Who's gonna hold your hat?
[''Running after his father'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning Perception of a Woman's Attire
Cletus "The Snowman" Snow
Hey, you got peanut butter or somethin in your ears? Tell me what that woman's got on! (Pause) Her mind? Ten-four!
[Talking over CB radio; ''Laughs wildly'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation and Acceptance of Boundaries
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
Apology accepted. Now, fuck off.
[a truck passes by, blowing its air horn and conveniently obscuring his profanity]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Bold Challenge in a Classic Adventure
Bandit
Just what the hell you want?
Big Enos
For you to get outta this dumbass rodeo, and accept a real challenge!
Bandit
Now, you want me to drive to Texarkana, pick up 400 cases of Coors and come back in 28 hours. No problem.
Little Enos
It ain't never been done before, hot shit.
Bandit
You watch your language, little lady. The problem here, is that Coors beer, you take that east of Texas and that's uh, that's bootlegging.
Little Enos
You know, I think you're just a little bit scared.
Bandit
That's great psychology. Why don't you say something bad about my mother?
Little Enos
Yo mamma is so ugly-
Bandit
Hey, wait a minute, wait a minute. Why do you want that beer so bad?
Little Enos
Cause he's thirsty, dummy!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pursuing the American Dream for Profit
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
For the good ol American life. For the money, for the glory, and for the fun. Mostly for the money.
[On why he's going to make the run to Texas and back]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Humorous Take on Unusual Suit Sizes
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
Oh, I love your suits. It must be a bitch finding suits size 68 extra fat and a 12 dwarf.
[to Big and Little Enos]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Concern for Fred's Well-Being
Cletus "The Snowman" Snow
I'm gettin worried about Fred here, he's lookin a little thin in the skin!
[On the CB radio, about his dog]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Running Blocker for Illegal Booze
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
Oh, I forgot to tell ya. I'm running blocker for 400 cases of illegal booze!
[In the middle of a car chase he explains to Carrie why they are being pursued]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confrontation Between Buford and Junior
Buford T. Justice
I saw that, you sumbitch! You did that on purpose! You're goin away till you're gray! I got the evidence! Put the evidence in the car.
[speaks to Junior]
Junior
But Daddy...
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Brief and Tumultuous Romance
Carrie
Actually, my heaviest relationship was with an acid-rock singer... named Robert Crumly. We were together, oh, eight-and-a-half days. God, I really thought that was it.
Bandit
And?
Carrie
One day, I came home and found him in the shower... with a girl... and her mother!
Bandit
Well, at least he kept it in the family.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Honesty in the Face of Authority
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
I can't lie to you, Sheriff. You're too good a man.
[Over radio to Sheriff Justice]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Disregard for Law and Order
Taglines
What we're dealing with here is a complete lack of respect for the law.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authority and Insults in Small-Town Life
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
She insulted my town! She insulted my son! Shaddup! She insulted my authority! And that's nothin but pure and simple old-fashioned communism. Happens every time one of those dancers starts poon-tangin around with those show-folk fags! I can see her now... runnin back up that aisle. No, she was dancin back up the aisle. Her knockers bouncin all over the joint. Her ass was wigglin too!
[Junior starts to say something]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reflecting on Friendship and Rivalry
Junior
Damn, he had a lot of friends, didn't he?
Sheriff Justice
If they'd have cremated the sumbitch, I'd have been kickin that Mr. Bandit's ass around the moon by now!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning the Purpose of Their Actions
Snowman
Hey,Bandit! Me and Fred got a question.
Bandit
What do you and Fred want?
Snowman
How come we doin this?
Bandit
Well, why not?
Snowman
Well, they said it couldn't be done!
Bandit
That's the reason, son!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Bandit Comments on Waynette's Hair Accessories
Bo "the Bandit" Darville
I find it hard to look at you Waynette, especially when you've got those things in your hair. Makes me think you're listening to a radio station in Savannah.
[to Snowman's wife]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Jurisdiction Dispute During High-Speed Chase
Sheriff Branford
Did you say that you are a sheriff?
Sheriff Justice
That's a big ten-four! This is Sheriff Buford T. Justice, of Texas!
Sheriff Branford
Texas? You realize of course that you are out of your jurisdiction? I suggest that you let my department handle the situation.
Sheriff Justice
That's very comfortin'. But I'm in high speed pursuit! Don't you hear good?
Sheriff Branford
I hear perfectly. The fact that you are a sheriff is not germane to the situation.
Sheriff Justice
The goddamn Germans got nothin to do with it!
Junior
What'd he say?
Sheriff Justice
Shut up! One shit at a time!
[cutting him off]
Junior
All right.
Sheriff Justice
Hey, boy, where's Sheriff Bradford?
Sheriff Branford
I am Sheriff Branford!
Sheriff Justice
Well, for some reason or another, you sounded a little taller on radio! What the hell is the world comin to?
[''Turns away, with Junior standing beside him'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Cletus Snowman's Bold Declaration
Cletus "The Snowman" Snow
You got the one Snowman! I'm ]!
[[wikipedia:East Bound and Down|eastbound and down]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sheriff's Frustration with Inefficiency
Sheriff Buford T. Justice
You sumbitches couldn't close an umbrella!
[Responding to a policeman who was unable to stop Bandit at a roadblock]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Determination in the Face of Adversity
Bandit
Cletus?
Snowman
Talk to me, m'boy!
Bandit
Goddamn it, son, we gave it our best shot. I don't like it any more than you do, but... we ain't gonna make it, son. We're gonna hang it up.
Snowman
WHOA! Negatory, negatory, what're you, crazy or something?! We come this far, ain't we?! LOOK, WHEN WE SAY WE GONNA DO A JOB, WE GONNA DO A JOB!
Bandit
It's me they after! They don't even know Cletus Snow exists!
Snowman
Oh, they don't? Well, I tell you what we gonna do! (Laughs) We just gonna introduce em to the boy. So move over a bit, good buddy, cause the Snowman is coming through! Hold on to your ass, Fred.
[''Hangs up his CB radio and looks at Fred the dog'']
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sheriff Justice's Frustration and Command
Sheriff Justice
Nobody... Nobody makes Sheriff Buford T. Justice look like a possum's pecker!
Junior
Except for that-
Sheriff Justice
Shut yo ass...
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.