Intellectuals and Perceptions in Stardust Memories
UFO Follower:
What have you got against intellectuals?
Sandy Bates:
Intellectuals? Nothing, why?
UFO Follower:
Mr. Bates, I've seen all your films. You really feel threatened by them.
Sandy Bates:
Threatened? You're kidding me. I've always said they're like the mafia. They only kill their own.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sandy Bates Defends His Artistic Identity
Question Askers-Screening:
Some people have claimed that your films are narcissistic.
Sandy Bates:
Yes, many people have said that about me over the years, but I don't think it's true. If I were to say which Greek God I take after, I would definitely not say Narcissus.
Question Askers-Screening:
Who would you say?
Sandy Bates:
Zeus.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Portrayal of God in Stardust Memories
Vivian Orkin:
In this film, he played the part of God.
Ghost of Sandy Bates:
This was not easy, folks, because, uh, you know, I-I-I didn't know what the hell I was doing, and I don't have a good voice for God.
Vivian Orkin:
And he received an Academy Award for his convincing portrayal of God... although they had to use another actor's voice.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Value of Humor in Service
Sandy Bates:
Shouldn't I stop making movies and do something that counts, like-like helping blind people or becoming a missionary or something?
Martian: [[Superman]
Let me tell you, you're not the missionary type. You'd never last. And-and incidentally, you're also not ]; you're a comedian. You want to do mankind a real service? Tell funnier jokes.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Fandom and Autographs in Stardust Memories
Fan:
My mother buys meat in the same butcher shop your mother does.
Sandy Bates:
Oh, great.
Fan:
Can I have your autograph?
Sandy Bates:
Oh, jeez.
Fan:
Could you just write: "To Phyllis Weinstein, you unfaithful, lying bitch.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Discussing a Controversial Film Idea
Fan:
Can I talk to you about an idea for a film I have?
Sandy Bates:
This is not the place.
Fan:
Do you have a moment, please? It's a comedy based on that whole Guyana mass suicide.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Nostalgia Triggered by Scent in Conversation
Dorrie: [[Marcel Proust|Proustian]
That aftershave. It just made my whole childhood come back with a sudden ] rush.
Sandy Bates:
Yeah? That's cause I'm wearing Proustian Rush by Chanel. It's-it's reduced. I got a vat of it.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unconventional Request for an Autograph
Female fan: [to Bates]
Will you autograph my left breast?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Faith and Opposition in Belief Systems
Sandy Bates:
To you, I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the loyal opposition.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstanding Classic Music and Its Origins
Sandy Bates: [[w:Goldberg Variations|Goldberg Variations]
I don't know much about classic music. For years I thought the ] were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg tried on their wedding night.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Limits of Control in Life and Art
Sandy Bates:
You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Philosophy Exam Reflection and Unexpected Success
Sandy Bates:
I took one course in existential philosophy at, uh, at New York University, and on, uh, on the final... they gave me ten questions, and, uh, I couldn't answer a single one of em. You know? I left em all blank... I got a hundred.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
