30 quotes
A Search for Cynthia in the Storm
Angelica Pickles
You dumb butthound! Fine! I hope you turn into a frog. Nyah! I'll find Cynthia myself! One way or another, I'm gonna find you, I'm gonna get you, get you, get you, get you! One way or another, I'm gonna win you, I'm gonna get you, get you, get you, get you! Cynthia, oh, Cynthia! I need to see you, I need to see you, see you, see you! From that kid or his brother, I'm gonna get you, I'm gonna get you, I'll get you! I'll find the full diaper bag! And if you're ripped or you're hurt, I'll push them in dirt! Yeah! Aah! Ooh! Oh! Stop! I said stop! CYNTHIAAA!
[furiously makes a face at him, angrily sticking out her tongue; singing; crosses a creek; splashes; rides a long in the water; climbs a mountain; climbs a tree; goes through the canyon with chiseled heads of Tommy and Dil; climbs another mountain; imagines Cynthia on the top; it was actually Spike; stamps her foot into the handle portion of Spike's leash, which causes Spike to run, dragging her along the way]
Tommy Pickles
Hey! Gimme back my brother! Shoo! Oh! Get outta here, you monkeys! Go! Come on. Let's get outta this rain.
[tries to tug Dil away from the monkeys; the wolf howls off-screen. The monkeys leave in fear]
Ranger Frank
I know you rookies can get excited and lose your heads, but veterans like me know the key is to remain calm and cool and collected.
[trying to stay calm]
Didi Pickles
Please, our kids are lost in the storm! You've got to help us!
Ranger Frank
THERE'S DRAGONS OUT THERE! I'M A PARK RANGER! NOT A KNIGHT AT A ROUND TABLE! GO FIND SOMEBODY WITH A LANCE!
Ranger Margaret
Never mind him. Come with me.
[leaves with the grown-ups]
Ranger Frank
W-What are you, come here, the dragon, I saw...
[whimpering and sobbing hysterically]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
An Adventure for Diaper-Wearing Explorers
Taglines
An adventure for anyone who's ever worn diapers.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Discovery on the Plane
Air Crewman
I've turned this plane upside down, and I assure you there are no children.
Delivery Man
No.
Air Crewman
We found a kid, but he's not the one you're looking for.
Stu Pickles
Tommy!
[looking in the closet]
Lou Pickles
Sprouts?
[looking under the bed]
Stu Pickles
Dil!
[looking down the basement]
Lou Pickles
Angelica?
[searching in a cookie jar]
Stu Pickles
Where can they be? We gotta find them!
[searching under the kitchen sink]
Didi Pickles
Find what?
[entering]
Stu
Ow!
[bangs his head under the sink]
Lou Pickles
Einstein here lost the kids.
[pointing at Stu]
Stu Pickles
I lost the kids?!
Lou Pickles
See?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Sibling's Bond in Crisis
Chuckie Finster
Phil? Lil? Aah! Ohh! Oh. Phil.
[sees Phil's shoes]
Lil DeVille
Chuckie?
[coming out]
Chuckie Finster
He always loved climbing on trees. Now a tree's climbed on him.
Lil DeVille
He was my favoritest brother. Speak to me, Philip!
[crying while holding her brother's shoes]
Phil DeVille
Have you guys seen my shoes?
[coming out alive]
Lil DeVille
Philip! I don't like this adventure anymore, Philip.
[relieved; Chuckie gasped in relief as she hugs him; gives him back his shoes]
Phil DeVille
Gosh, Chuckie, this time we really are doomed.
Lil DeVille
Doomed! Doomed! Doomed!
[cries]
Phil DeVille
Snap out of it, Lilian! We gotta find the lizard!
Chuckie Finster
I don't know, guys. If we find the lizard and Tommy doesn't, how's he ever gonna get home?
Phil DeVille
What are you worried about him for? He's the one who was gonna let you get eated by a fish!
Lil DeVille
All he cares about now is baby Dil.
Chuckie DeVille
Yeah, well, somebody has to. Don't they?
Tommy Pickles
Baby, please, rest your head. Soon we will be home in bed. Until then, I'll protect...you like no other. You're okay for a little brother.
[singing a lullaby]
Dil Pickles
My Tommy.
[calms down, and smiles]
Tommy Pickles
My Dil.
[smiles as well]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Diapering Dilemmas Among Toddler Friends
Lil DeVille
The powder goes on his bottom, Tommy!
Tommy Pickles
Well, I'm doing the best I can.
Dil Pickles
Pee-pee!
[hits Tommy with his feet; giggles and pees]
Phil DeVille
Look out!
Chuckie Finster
Stop it, Dil!
Tommy Pickles
Get him off me!
Chuckie Finster
AAH! FROG! FROG! AAH! Oh. Your brother made a frog jump on me!
[falls, then a frog jumps on his head; runs around and falls face first in a pile of leaves. The frog hops away; Phil and Lil help him up; starts to walk over to Tommy]
Dil Pickles
Stop it!
Chuckie Finster
Stop it!
Dil Pickles
Stop it!
Chuckie Finster
You stop it!
Dil Pickles
Stop it!
Chuckie Finster
Stop it!
Tommy Pickles
Hey, guys, maybe we should stop playing around and figure out how to get home.
[puts a diaper on Dil]
Lil DeVille
But, Tommy, we don't even know where we are.
Tommy Pickles
Uh, I know! I've got my sponsatility!
[pulls out his pocket watch]
Lil DeVille
What's a sponsatility, Tommy?
Phil DeVille
Sounds yucky.
Tommy Pickles
No, it's what you get for being a big brother. It's just like Okey-Dokey Jones uses when he has to find his way home.
[putting Dil in the Reptar Wagon]
Phil DeVille
I thought that's called a crumpass.
[pulling a duffel bag to the Reptar Wagon]
Tommy Pickles
Well, my dad gave it to me, and he called it a sponsatility.
Phil DeVille
Where's it say to go?
Tommy Pickles
Well, um, uh, hmm. This way. Uh...That's the way! Straight up that hill!
Angelica Pickles
Aahhh! Bad dog, bad dog! STOP! You know, not all dogs go to heaven.
[they approach the scene of the mattress truck's crash, complete with tow truck and flares. Spike finds Dil's pacifier on the ground and stops. But she keeps going, and Spike is tugged along on his leash as they plummet into the woods. They bounce off several tree branches. She screams as she trips on her skates, then falls and lands upside down against a tree, knocking her unconscious. We fade out, then fade back in again once she comes to. As soon as her vision clears, the first thing she sees is Spike, holding her detective hat]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Holistic Birthing and Traditional Views on Parenting
Dr. Lipschitz
Welcome to the Werner P. Lipschitz Center for Holistic Birthing, offering the modern parent the state of the art in primitive birth alternatives.
[on monitors]
Nurse
Oh, Mrs. Pickles! You weren't due till next week, now, dear. Geez, well, I guess we could try and squeeze you in somewhere, huh?
Didi Pickles
But Dr. Lipschitz promised us the all-natural Zen experience in the Tibetan terrace room!
Boris Kropotkin
In my day, a woman just dropped her baby in the potato field and kept going.
Nurse
Ah, yes, the old country room.
[opens door to a room that has maternity equipment in a middle of a potato field, complete with cows and a farmer]
Didi Pickles
Do you have anything a little cleaner?
Nurse
Well, we could try the aquatic immersion room.
Minka Kerpackter
She's having a baby, not a gefilte fish!
Lucy Carmichael
Oh! Stu, Didi, Randy called to say you were on your way. I didn't realize you were bringin the whole party! How far apart are the pains, hon?
[laughs]
Stu Pickles
Oh, they're... pretty much constant.
[Didi squeezes his hand very tight]
Lucy Carmichael
Okay, Didi, let's go and get you settled in, huh?
Lou Pickles
Here you go, sprout.
Didi Pickles
Don't worry, sweetie, mommy's going to be okay.
[to Tommy]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, gosh, Tommy, your mommy sure seems upset.
Lil DeVille
Maybe your baby sister really is losted.
Tommy Pickles
Whoa! Maybe we can buy her a new one.
Chuckie Finster
Where're we gonna find a baby in a place like this?
Lou Pickles
You got any queens?
Boris Kropotkin
Go fish.
Phil DeVille
Hey, a baby store.
Lil DeVille
Nice and wiggly.
Tommy Pickles
You guys, help me pick one my mom will like.
Lisa Loeb
Where am I?
[singing]
B-Real
How did I get here?
[singing]
Patti Smith
Things look different than yesterday.
[singing]
Lou Rawls
So this is the world?
[singing]
Laurie Anderson
I miss my old womb.
[singing]
Gordon Gano
The wallpaper here just ain't the same.
[singing]
Fred Schneider
This world is something strange.
[singing; hides under a blanket]
Lisa Loeb
I'm wet.
[singing]
Phife Dawg
I'm cold!
[singing; wrapped in a blanket]
Lenny Kravitz
I need a change!
[singing; waggles his diaper]
Chorus
This world is something new to me.
[tossed their blankets in air]
Phife Dawg
Oh, my head! What is this? I can't take it!
[singing]
Dawn Robinson
Me either!
[singing; on an adjacent monitor]
Beck
I'm hungry.
[singing]
Lou Rawls
I'm tired.
[singing]
Jakob Dylan
I'm irritated!
[singing; pounds a crib floor to make a pacifier bounce]
Lou Rawls
But I love the extra leg room.
[singing; moves his legs]
Patti Smith
Man! They cut my cord!
[singing; points to her bellybutton]
Iggy Pop
Ohoho, consider yourself lucky!
[singing; looks in his diaper]
B-Real
This world is way too big!
[singing]
Iggy Pop
And populated by fuzzy pigs.
[singing; baby points at Chuckie, who's pressing his face against the glass]
Chorus
This world is something new to me.
Fred Schneider
This world is such a gas.
[singing; Passes Gas, causing his diaper to inflate]
Kate Pierson and Cindy Wilson
UGH! P.U., where's your class?
[singing]
Chorus
This world is something new to me.
Beck
Quiet! Can't a guy get some shuteye?!
[singing]
Patti Smith
It's so noisy in here!
[singing]
Iggy Pop
I can barely hear myself suck!
[singing; grabs a bottle from Chuckie and chugs it down]
Jakob Dylan
The food here tastes pretty good.
[singing]
Phife Dawg
My compliments to the chef.
[singing]
Dawn Robinson
And you gotta holler to get fed.
[singing]
Lou Rawls
But I could get used to that.
[singing]
Lisa Loeb
This world is way too bright.
[singing]
Beck
Can't somebody turn down the light?
[singing]
Gordon Gano
So that's what that thing looks like.
[singing; looks inside his diaper]
Jakob Dylan
All things here are meant for play,
[singing]
Fred Schneider
It's gonna be a real cool day.
[singing]
Chorus
This world is something new to me. This world is something new to me.
[one of the newborns screams Ba-da-bu-bu-bu-bu-bu. Baby boy; "Real cool", while another one says, "La-la-la-la!". As a rainbow forms from the "fountain" at the circle-shaped light]
Lou Pickles
There you are!
Boris Kropotkin
Oy, gevalt! You kinder gave my ticker such a scare!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Adventure and Snack Cravings in the Journey
Tommy Pickles
Good job, you guys. We're almost there. Good, Dil. Now, play nice.
[to the babies; to Dil; Dil hits him with his baby bottle]
Phil DeVille
Not much fun back there, is it?
Tommy Pickles
Oh, we're doing okay. That's some good hittin there, Dilly.
[to Dil; Dil hits him again]
Chuckie Finster
I'm hungry. Right about now my daddy would be making me a fried baloney sandwich. I can almost smell that burning. Ooh, it tastes all crunchy.
Tommy Pickles
Stop it, Chuckie. You're making me hungry.
[Dil hits him again]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, no!
Lil Deville
We can't see our houses from here, Tommy.
Phil DeVille
We can't see any houses from here.
Chuckie Finster
We're doomed! Doomed. Doomed, I tell you!
Lieutenant Klavin
Mrs. Pickles, I know this is hard for you, but can you identify this binky?
[picks up the pacifier; holds up the pacifier]
Phil DeVille
This is all Dil's fault! Right, Chuckie?
Chuckie Finster
Uh...
Tommy Pickles
Uh, uh! This never would've happened if you hadn't putted him in the wagon in the first place, right, Chuckie?
Chuckie Finster
Uh...Uh - Uh...
Lil DeVille
It's not our fault you got a bad, naughty, stinky baby for a brother!
Tommy Pickles
He's not naughty. He's just a...he's just a...a baby! How could you be mad just because you're... ...um...standing there all nakie? I mean, I'm sure he's trying to help. And side's, it's hot, phew, exploring in the woods all day. Ah! A little breeze feels good. Just what I needed. Oh, thank you, Dil.
[Dil rips a tab on Tommy's diaper and it drops. He looks down, shocked and embarrassed, but he plays it off to defend his brother. The others stare at Tommy's exposure, with Lil in particular giving a peculiar creepy smile before looking away; picks up his diaper]
Phil DeVille
Those hiccups are really starting to bug me.
Lil DeVille
Face it, Tommy. Having a baby brother just isn't what you expected.
Chuckie Finster
Hey, you guys, look. Somebody's house. Tommy was right.
[sees the smoke from the distance]
Tommy Pickles
Wow. My sponsatility does work.
[amazed]
Phil DeVille
Yeah, but who'd have a house way out there in the forest?
Tommy Pickles
Maybe a lizard lives there.
Chuckie Finster
A lizard?
Tommy Pickles
You know, a big guy with a pointy hat that grants wishes. All's we got to do is knock on the door and say we wanna go home. See? Then everything will be back to Norman.
Phil DeVille
Thank, Bob!
Lil DeVille
Thank you, Bob.
Tommy Pickles
Come on, guys! We're off to see the lizard!
[trips on something]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, Tommy, are you okay?
[helps him up]
Tommy Pickles
I'm fine. I just tripped in a little hole, that's all.
Chuckie Finster
Gosh, it looks kinda like Spike's feet; only if he was a giant.
[studies the paw print]
Phil DeVille
I saw feetprints like that in our storybook. A wolf made them, and then he ate that little red riding girl.
Chuckie Finster
The wolf ate a girl?
Phil DeVille
They got her out.
Tommy Pickles
I don't think it's a wolf, Chuckie. If it was, we'd hear him say... Uhh...
[prepares to mimic a wolf sound, but the wolf's howl is heard in the distance. He looks around nervously]
Phil DeVille
That was pretty good.
Tommy Pickles
I didn't do anything.
Tommy Pickles
Do you see the wolf?!
Chuckie Finster
I don't know what he looks like!
Phil DeVille
Teeth! Teeth and fur! And teeth!
Tommy Pickles
No, Dil! Bad Dil! No!
Reptar Wagon
I am Reptar!
[roars]
Ranger Frank
Margaret? That's your name, isn't it? I'm sure you've run afoul of many a scary pedestrian. But out here, we have what you might call...hmm, how should I put it? Actual danger.
[turns off the radio]
Ranger Margaret
Danger?
[gasps]
Ranger Frank
Grizzlies that'll rip the top off your car. Bobcats, wolves, wolverines, which are something entirely different.
Ranger Margaret
And dragons. Ha!
Chuckie Finster
Tommy, I sawed some grownups! Stop! Stop!
Tommy Pickles
I don't know how!
[pushes several buttons in vain]
Lil DeVille
Well, I hope you figure it out, cause I didn't bring no bathing suit!
Phil DeVille
Any further, and I would've needed a fresh diapie.
Tommy Pickles
Dil, no!
Reptar Wagon
Aqua Reptar, engaged.
Ranger Margaret
I'm telling you, I saw a dragon.
Ranger Frank
Margaret.
Ranger Margaret
A big green, fire-breathing dragon. I've got to call headquarters.
[rushes to the phone]
Ranger Frank
While you're at it, you might ask for a new assignment, say, a city park. Cause, you see, out here in the country, you have to be just a little tougher. AAAH! AAH! THE DRAGON! I JUST SAW IT! I SAW IT!
[sees the Reptar Wagon in his telescope. The wagon floats with the current in the water. He screams like a little girl and backs away from the telescope]
Ranger Margaret
Where?! Where?! Where? Here? Where?
[looks through the telescope, but the wagon is nowhere to be seen]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Exploring a Vast and Unfamiliar Place
Chuckie Finster
Where are we?
Tommy Pickles
I don't know. It looks kinda like the park.
Lil DeVille
Only bigger.
Chuckie Finster
Bigger? This place is bigger than the park and the backyard all put together. This is bad you guys. This is bad.
Lil DeVille
Uh-oh, Tommy, I think your brother is broke again.
Tommy Pickles
Oh, no. Dil, are you okay?
Phil DeVille
I think he's gonna explode.
Dil Pickles
Mama, me Backy-Poop.
Tommy Pickles
What?
Dil Pickles
MAMA, ME BACKY-POOP!!!
[groans; a wet fart can be heard]
Babies
Eww!
[gasping and moaning]
Tommy Pickles
Well, I guess we'll have to change his diapie.
Phil DeVille
What do you mean, we?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Concerns About Childcare and Family Dynamics
Didi Pickles
I can't believe you left them with your father! The man slept through Pearl Harbor, for heaven's sake!
Lou Pickles
I sounded the alarm as soon as I could!
Lieutenant Klavin
Uh, Mrs. Pickles, does your son have any enemies?
Didi Pickles
Oh...
Lieutenant Klavin
Uh-huh. Any underworld or mob connections?
Didi Pickles
He's a baby!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Chaos and Fun Amidst a Sleepy Situation
Stu Pickles
How could you fall asleep when you were supposed to be watching the kids?! We'll never find the babies with this jerk in front of us! Whoa!
[Lou sleeps in the passenger seat. The mattress truck is right in front of Stu and Lou. The back door opens with the babies in view, jumping on a mattress. However, he isn't watching the road at that moment, as he's talking to Lou; the truck's back door closes shut just as he returns his attention back to the road. Trying to pass, he honks his horn; narrowly misses an oncoming car and inadvertently cuts off the mattress truck, causing it to swerve and crash through the guard rail and plunge into the forest. The truck driver leaps out just in time. The oblivious babies are still inside the truck, having fun]
Phil DeVille
This is more fun than picking noses!
Lil DeVille
Or making bubbles in the bathtub!
Chuckie Finster
I don't know if I should throw up or throw down!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Coffee Debate Between Friends
Igor
Serge, you stay here and watch monkeys, I get us coffee.
Serge
No, Igor, you stay and watch monkeys and I get us coffee.
Igor
Nyet! Monkeys watch you, I GET COFFEE!
Serge
You know, I think coffee's better in St. Petersburg.
Igor
Nyet, is better in Kiev.
Serge
No, it's better in St. Petersburg.
Igor
Nothing is better in St. Petersburg!
Serge
Look! The train! Let me out! Stop!
[sees this and spits out his drink; the men rush out, bumping over tables and other customers]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Pirate Adventure Among the Rugrats
Tommy Pickles
Slob the poop deck, Mr. Phil. Hoist the ankle, number one. A pirate's life is a life for me!
[singing]
Lil DeVille
Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Chuckie Finster
I get seasick on the sea!
[singing]
Phil and Lil
Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Phil DeVille
Hoist the Reptar flag real high!
[singing]
Tommy Pickles
My sword is pointed to the sky!
[singing]
Lil DeVille
You need a patch across your eye! From Zanzibar...
[singing; Chuckie groans, nauseous]
Phil DeVille
...to candy bar!
[singing]
Both
Yo ho ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Tommy Pickles
We search for treasures near and far!
[singing]
Phil and Lil
Yo ho ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Lil DeVille
Beware your ship should cross our path.
[singing]
Phil DeVille
We'll shoot a cannon through your mast!
[singing]
Chuckie Finster
Remove your gold baboons by half.
[singing]
Dil Pickles
Yo-oh-oh-oh!
Tommy Pickles
A pirate's life is the life for me!
[singing]
Both
Yo ho ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Chuckie Finster
Adventure on the open sea.
[singing]
Phil and Lil
Yo ho ho and a bottle of yum!
[singing]
Babies
Oh!
Tommy Pickles
Dil!
[saves Dil]
Chuckie Finster
Help me, Tommy! Fish!
[falls overboard; notices the water is shallow, it only reaches his hips. He stands up with a relieved smile. Suddenly, he feels a wiggling sensation in his pants and pulls out a fish]
Phil DeVille
Man overboard!
Lil DeVille
Hang on, Chuckie!
[throws a life ring to Chuckie, which he was able to catch. The wagon tows him as if he was water skiing]
Chuckie Finster
Aaahh!
Phil DeVille
Look at him go!
Chuckie Finster
Tommy, why didn't you help me?
Tommy Pickles
I'm sorry, Chuckie, but, Dil, he needed me and he's just a-
Phil and Lil DeVille
Just a baby!
[drop Chuckie on the floor]
Lil DeVille
Uh-oh!
Tommy Pickles
Hard to port side. Turn! Turn around! Help me, you guys! Help! Dil, no!
[Chuckie and the twins grab the wheel and just manage steer the wagon away from the falls. Dil grabs a lever]
Lou Pickles
Whoa now!
Stu Pickles
I knew my Dactar would come in handy. Pop, are you okay? Oh, pop.
[a pully breaks from the ceiling and Dactar Lou; Ow fall towards Grandpa, who hits the deck. He and Chas flinch as dust fills the room; the dust settles to reveal Grandpa is sleeping under the wreckage, unharmed]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Coping with a New Baby's Crying
Stu Pickles
Didi, what are we gonna do? He hasn't stopped crying since we brought him home!
Phil DeVille
Somehow it's not as much fun around here anymore.
Chuckie Finster
Yeah! What's your brother so sad about?
Tommy Pickles
I don't know! But whatever it is, it must be really bad.
Lil DeVille
Maybe he's broked!
Tommy Pickles
What?!
Both
Broked!
Tommy Pickles
Broked? He's not broked! He's, uhh...just a little loud!
[Stu, Didi and a still-crying Dil walk by]
Angelica Pickles
Ooh, that baby's getting on my nerves!
[Out of Sailor Dressing-Up]
Announcer
Direct from Moscow, the Banana Brothers Monkey Circus! Featuring the most amazing monkeys since Brezhnev! This is real monkey business, so Trotsky on down. The Banana Brothers Monkey Circus!
[circus logo slides into view]
Angelica Pickles
GRANDPA! CAN WE GO TO THE CIRCUS?!
Lou Pickles
It's enough of a circus around here already!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Complexities of Parenting Explained
Stu Pickles
Oh, for the love of Pete. What do you want from us? What? What?
[exhausted; lays on the floor with Dil]
Didi Pickles
Oh, there must be something in here we missed. Somewhere, somehow, something!
Stu Pickles
There must be. Let me see here! Cats, colic, Creole baby food. Uh, oh yeah, here it is. Crying... Although a baby's crying signifies a disruption in the infant-parent matrix, the good-enough parent pacifies the infant during this period of primary narcissism, foregoing their own needs, sublim-, sublimating, sublimating all their own needs too.
[grabs the book from Didi and looks inside; we skim the text of the book as he reads it. After the second "infant", we cut to his blood-shot eyes, then to an exhausted him and Didi on the couch]
Dr. Lipschitz
Raising a baby is a serious venture. Not to be embarked upon by the faint of heart. Parents must make choices that are perfect and wise, / For you're doing something wrong when the baby cries. You must consider, the psychology of an infant, Nature vs. Nurture, / Feed the ego; starve the mind. You must anticipate each crisis sure to arise, / For you're doing something wrong when the baby cries. Don't forget the older when attending to the younger, / Sibling rivalry can damage all of you. Be a mother, don't smother, / Why do you want a neurosis? Failure to oralise can lead to toilet training disturbances. Wrong! Wrong! Careful, now! No, no, no! Bad parents! Bad parents! Raising a baby is a complicated venture. / Not to be embarked on by a weaker constitution. It's really something different, from what we fantacise, / You are doing something wrong when the baby cries. It's really very different, from what we fantacise, / You are doing something wrong when the baby...starts to...cry!
[singing; Stu and Didi "wake up"; one of the winged babies take away the Lipschitz book, while the other baby picks up Dil and takes him away; plops dunce caps on Stu and Didi; a book on top of a pile of books opens, and he picks up the couple and drops them into some sort of netherworld. In that world, Stu and Didi races up a "staircase" of books; Stu and Didi then appear as small babies - Stu in diapers, and Didi all wrapped up, sucking on a pacifier; Twin Lipschitzes appear on either side of the crib. They embrace each other, then turn into a Rorschach print, which he holds, while sitting in a chair; a saw saws a hole underneath Stu & Didi, then, they fall through. They are picked up by a giant stork by its claws, holding him inside its beak, while flying with a flock of storks. Cut to a puppet theater, with puppeteer Lipschitz holding Stu and Didi puppets. Tommy and Dil snatch the puppets from him, and fight over them; the Pickles' house plops on top of them. As its walls bulge, Stu & Didi rush out with Dil, dodging falling giant baby items - rattle, baby bottle, safety pin; Dil grows unbelievably large, crushing Stu & Didi; Dil's diaper bulges, then explodes. Cut to Stu, changing Dil's diaper. He pops out of a diaper pail, yelling; cut to Didi, rocking Tommy & Dil to sleep. They start to cry when he rolls up a window and shouts; cut to Stu, strolling Dil with Tommy on his back. He looks with a magnifying glass, as Drew, Betty and Charlotte look on; cut to Dil crying, in an auto carrier. Stu and Didi rush to his aid, when he, with Chaz, Lou and Howard looking on, opens the roof and says; cut to Stu, Didi and Dil rushing through the city. The winged babies picked them up and flew them to a temple of justice. He appears as a "lawyer"; then appears as a giant baby, standing on the table, between Dil and Tommy; leaps to the couple. Then, he goes to a jury of Dils, which gives "thumbs down". The couple magically appears in prison garb, and a ball and chain]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Chaos in the Woods with Lost Babies
Rex Pester
A truckload of babies and their pet horse lost in the woods. Our hearts go out to their grief-stricken parents... Look out, Pickles! Now look what you've done! Are you out of your mind?! Get out! [pushes Stu and Dactar away from the chopper, but breaks the controls off accidentally
[Stu's Dactar crashes into the chopper; Stu screams in panic; Stu groans. He fights the pilot over the controls]
Stu Pickles
Whoa!
Rex Pester
And I never won an Emmy!
[crying]
Stu Pickles
Oops. I'm coming, Tommy. I'm coming, Dil. Oh! Ah!
[drops the chopper's handlebars before continues flying haphazardly; a couple of screws come loose]
Angelica Pickles
Ugh! Hurry up, babies!
[still carrying Cynthia as she's climbing back on the bridge]
Chuckie Finster
Don't let them take me!
Angelica Pickles
Don't let them take Cynthia!
Lil DeVille
I don't think they're going to take anyone. Look!
Babies
Yay!
Lil DeVille
Yeah! Go home, monkeys!
Angelica Pickles
Hooray! Dumb-dumb monkeys!
Babies
Oh!
Chuckie Finster
We wanna go home. We wanna go home.
[scared]
Babies
Aah!
Dil Pickles
Yuckies!
Babies
Yay!
Tommy
Yay, Spike!
Dil Pickles
Spike, Spike!
[bouncing on the seat]
Tommy Pickles
Oh, no, Spike! Spike!
Lil DeVille
You gotta get outta there, Spikey!
Angelica Pickles
Yo, dumb wolf!
[blows raspberries at the wolf]
Babies
Spike!
[alarmed]
Dil Pickles
Spike?
[now sad]
Tommy Pickles
Oh, Spike.
[tearfully]
Angelica Pickles
Dumb dog! Why'd you have to go and...
[sobs]
Stu Pickles
Whoa! Deed, I found them! They're over by the ranger station! I'm going IIIIIIIIINNNN!!!!!! Ahh!
[suddenly spots the babies on the bridge; Dactar crashes for the last time, into the ranger's station. The babies gasped. The ranger's station collapsed to the ground. Now feeling all woozy, he gets up on his feet, "wearing" Dactar's remnants, and walks towards the bridge]
Babies
The lizard!
[gasped]
Babies
Ohh!
Tommy Pickles
Please, Mr. Lizard, we wish we could go...No. We wish we had our doggie back.
[pulls up his diaper and speaks to the "Lizard"; looks at the babies, who are still sad]
Stu Pickles
Ahhh.
[busts through the bridge, still wearing Dactar]
Tommy Pickles
Spike!
[looks down the hole, suddenly relieved]
Phil DeVille
He's alive!
Lil DeVille
Thank you, Mr. Lizard!
Didi
My babies! My babies! Oh Dil! My darling!
[tears of joy; kisses them both]
Howard DeVille
We're here! Mommy and daddy are here!
[hugging his twins]
Betty DeVille
You rascals!
[hugging their twins]
Chaz Finster
Daddy's here. Oh, Chuckie!
Charlotte Pickles
Angelica, sweetheart, everything's going to be okay!
Angelica Pickles
Oh, mommy, oh, daddy!
[last words]
Chaz Finster
Did you miss me? You okay?
[to Chuckie offscreen]
Lou Pickles
You've got the Pickle spirit, son. Maybe not the brain, but the spirit.
[pull Stu up with a rope]
Didi Pickles
Oh, Stu, you did it! You found our boys.
Stu Pickles
Yeah, I guess I did.
[smiles]
Igor
My little furry comrades!
Serge
Splendid monkeys, come to papa. Who's your daddy?
Female Reporter
Babies and monkeys, both lost. Now both found.
Rex Pester
This is my story, pal! I'm Rex Pester. Stay tuned. Aah! No, not my toupee! No!
[last words; now injured, shoves the female reporter out of sight; the monkeys gang up on Rex and fight him. Camera cuts to static]
Betty DeVille
Go get him, you little simians!
[laughing]
Charlotte Pickles
Hey, Rex, time for your close up!
Chaz Finster
Oh, dear, too bad.
[mock sympothy]
Stu Pickles
I'm sorry about all this Drew.
Drew Pickles
It's all right, little brother. For a nincompoop, you're not half bad.
Stu Pickles
Remember there was Swamptar?
Drew Pickles
Oh yeah, I remember that. Got mud all over...
Chuckie Finster
And that was our big adventure. The Monkeys founded their daddies, and we all gots to go home and have fried baloney sandwiches. But not Dil, cause he gots no teeth. But if you think thing went back to the way they was before, you're wrong, cause now, thanks to Baby Dil, they was even better!
[voice over; Dil, wearing a viking helmet, rides on Chuckie's back. They climb and grab the icon as before, but this time, Dil got ahold of it; chuckles]
Babies
Yay!
[cheering]
Chuckie Finster
Way to go, Dilly!
[last lines]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Facing Fears Together in Adventure
Chuckie Finster
Ahh! This place give me the juicebumps!
Phil DeVille
Maybe we should go back!
Lil DeVille
Very back!
Tommy Pickles
No, We can't go back now, you guys! Okey-Dokey Jones never goes back! Hang on to your diapies, babies, we're goin in!
[the babies move near a door-shaped like Angelica's head. They act surprised. Inside the "mouth" is a bright, orange-colored light]
Chuckie Finster
That's Tommy Pickles. He's the bravest baby I ever knowed! And that's Phil and Lil. Uh, uh, well, they, they like worms. And I'm Chuckie. Uh...I'm not so brave. But that's okay, cause I got Tommy, and he's my bestest friend.
[voice-over; as he talks, Tommy races toward the door. As he gets there, the door slams, while he raced in there once it's open, and after he enters, it slams shut again. Phil and Lil look surprised; Phil and Lil hold hands and rush in through the door, which closed behind them; he's hesitant to enter, but is whipped in by Tommy; giggles]
Chuckie Finster
Watch out!
Tommy Pickles
Keep moving! It's right behind us!
Chuckie Finster
Tommy! Help me!
Tommy Pickles
Come on, Chuckie!
[looking back at Chuckie and the gate, he then grabs Chuckie's hand, pulling him up]
Didi Pickles
Tommy! You kids shouldn't be playing in here!
[The babies scream and run away]
Chuckie Finster
We thought the fun times would last forever. But we was wrong.
[voice-over; the babies bumped into Spike, and run face-first into glass patio door, then fall over]
Didi Pickles
Oh, my.
Betty DeVille
Upsy-daisy, Didi.
[holds onto Didi as she picks up the babies]
Didi Pickles
Thanks.
Susie Carmichael
Thank you for inviting me to your baby shower, Mrs. Pickles.
Didi Pickles
Glad you could be here, Susie.
Woman Guest
What a pretty party dress, Angelica.
Angelica Pickles
Thank you, my mommy's assistant bought it, especially for my Aunt Didi's party. Don't say a word.
[first words; Susie laughs while making fun of her Sailor Dressing-Up]
Aunt Miriam
All right, I got $20 on 8 pounds, 6 ounces. 8 pounds 6. Who's got 8-7?
Male Guest
I'm in for 12!
Aunt Miriam
12 pounds? What are you, crazy?
Chaz Finster
Gosh, you can hardly tell she's gained any weight.
Woman Guest
Oh, don't worry.
Chaz Finster
I mean, you know from behind.
Minka Kerpackter
There you are, Didila. Come. Look what we got for you. Boris, move your tuchus.
Didi Pickles
A goat? Oh, Mom, you shouldn't have.
Minka Kerpackter
Nothing better for the little bubula than goat's milk.
Boris Kropotkin
Except maybe yak. But you try finding good yak these days. He's saying, "Hello". There you go, kinderwund, some chocolate coins.
[the babies run and bump into the goat and it bleats]
Woman Guest
Everything I, oh...
Phil DeVille
Aren't you gonna eat it, Tommy?
Tommy Pickles
Nope. I'm saving it for my baby sister.
Chuckie Finster
Oh, you mean, she finally came?
Tommy Pickles
Not yet, but they're giving her this big party, so I'm pretty sure today's the day.
Lil DeVille
Do you think she got losted on her way to the party?
Tommy Pickles
Hmm, I don't know. Maybe we better go look for her. Come on!
Chuckie Finster
Uh, but, Tommy, she could be anywheres.
Betty DeVille
Watch it, pups.
Didi Pickles
Careful.
Charlotte Pickles
I'll get back to you, Jonathan. I've got to say "hi" to the life of the party. How's our little man?
[on phone; to Didi, as she pats her stomach with her cellphone]
Didi Pickles
I told you, Charlotte, Dr. Lipschitz says it's a girl.
[rubs her stomach]
Betty DeVille
Ha! That windbag thought Phil and Lil were intestinal gas.
Aunt Miriam
Face it, dolly. Riding high, it's a guy.
Charlotte Pickles
Well, you know what they say, "Born under Venus, look for a-" Hello?
[her phone then rings]
Didi Pickles
Now, now, Dr. Lipschitz is the expert. I don't see any of you with a PHD in Latin.
Betty DeVille
Yeah, Pig Latin maybe. Well, let's just hope for Tommy's sake it's a girl. I'd hate to think how much my pups would be squabbling if they were both boys.
Didi Pickles
Uh, uh, uh. Let's not do any gender stereotyping. After all, Stu and Drew are brothers, and they get along just fine.
Stu Pickles
Pushy!
Drew Pickles
Lazy!
Stu Pickles
Bossy!
Drew Pickles
Inconsiderate!
Stu Pickles
Nosy!
Drew Pickles
Good for nothing!
Stu Pickles
Busybody!
Stu Pickles and Drew Pickles
WHY CAN'T YOU LISTEN TO ME?!
[in unison]
Drew Pickles
We're talking about a real job, Stu, with benefits!
Stu Pickles
I'm not going to waste my life as a clock-punching, paper-pushing, bean-counting... Oh, no offense.
[Drew gasps in shock; pulls down his welding mask and proceeds to weld]
Drew Pickles
You barely make ends meet now. You got no insurance, no savings, and another kid on the way!
Stu Pickles
For your information, bro, I am working on something right now that is going to put this branch of the Pickles family on easy street.
[puts down his welding mask]
Drew Pickles
What is it this time, huh, an electric sponge?
[angrily lifts up Stu's welding mask again]
Stu Pickles
Of course not! That was last year. This, this is the Reptar Wagon! The ultimate in toddler transportation! The perfect children's toy!
[reveals his skeleton of the Reptar Wagon]
Lou Pickles
In my day, we had plenty of fun just throwin rocks at each other. Big bag of dirt clods, that's what the kids want.
[while fixing an old radio]
Stu Pickles
The Reptar Corporation is holding a toy design contest and the winner gets $500!
Drew Pickles
Ooh!
[sarcastically]
Stu Pickles
And there'll be plenty more if this toy's a hit, and I'll be famous!
Drew Pickles
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what you said when you built that stupid thing.
Stu Pickles
Maybe Dactar was a little bit complex, but...this...this...watch! I am Reptar! Hear me roar!
[speaking into a microphone with his normal voice]
Reptar Wagon
I am Reptar! Hear me roar!
[Stu's voice, distorted]
Lou Pickles
Con-flam it! Can't a man work in his own basement without gettin barbecued?!
[putting out some flames on his sleeve]
Stu Pickles
Okay, so maybe real fire isn't the best idea for a children's toy.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Angelica's Concerns and Spike's Adventure
Angelica Pickles
Hey, Spike! Where are you going, you dumb dog?! Hey! My rolly blade is cracked. Oh, Cynthia. Are they taking care of you? Will they know to comb your hair, or change you into your sports jumper with matching neckerchief at lunch time? Pee-yew, Spike! Dog breath! Spike?
[[trips on a stone; Spike appears in front of her; the wolf appears behind her back; takes one of her skates off; tosses the skate towards the back, unknowingly striking the wolf's head]
Stu Pickles
Don't worry. This time she'll fly. I'm facing into the wind.
[accidentally pops up the loose handlebars]
Lou Pickles
He's ready?
Chaz Finster
No.
Lou Pickles
Go?
[mishearing]
Chaz Finster
No!
[louder]
Lou Pickles
All right, then!
[still mishearing; drives off]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, This is bad! Bad!
Phil DeVille
Shh! Here comes Tommy.
[sees Tommy coming back with the duffel bag]
Lil DeVille
Put the blankie on him.
Tommy Pickles
Okay, guys! I got it.
Chuckie Finster
Um, I think it's gonna rain, Tommy.
Phil DeVille
Oh yeah, we better go.
Tommy Pickles
I gotta finish feeding my brother.
Lil DeVille
I don't think he's hungry.
Chuckie Finster
Yeah. Besides, he's, um...
Tommy Pickles
A monkey?
[lifts the blanket, and is shocked to see a baby monkey drinking a bottle]
Phil DeVille
Wow! Look at that!
Tommy Pickles
My brother turned into a monkey?!
Chuckie Finster
Come on, Tommy. We gotta get outta here.
Tommy Pickles
I can't go home with my brother being a monkey!
Chuckie Finster
Oh, but Tommy, we gotta get to the lizard's house.
Tommy Pickles
That's it! I'll get the lizard to wish him back into a people!
[brightens]
Phil DeVille
The lizard's only going to give us one wish.
Chuckie Finster
Yeah, and if you use it up on Dil, how are we gonna get home?
Tommy Pickles
He's my brother, Chuckie! I have to wish him back!
Lil DeVille
You can't do that!
Tommy Pickles
Yes, I can! What would you do if Phil turned into a monkey?
Lil DeVille
That's different. I like Phillip! Besides, you'd be wasting your wish anyway, cause that's not even your brother. Wait a minute.
[Tommy and Chuckie gasped]
Chuckie Finster
What Lillian means is...um...the monkeys kind of took baby Dil, and we just - we thought you wouldn't mind a baby monkey instead.
Tommy Pickles
What?!
[shocked]
Lil DeVille
Lookit, Tommy, nobody likes him!
Phil DeVille
We're gonna find that lizard, Tommy. You can find your brother by yourself!
Tommy Pickles
Will you help me, Chuckie?
Chuckie Finster
Sorry, Tommy.
[refused]
Tommy Pickles
But-But you're my bestest friend.
[shocked again]
Chuckie Finster
Yeah? Well, if-if I'm your bestest friend, then how come when I got throwed up on, you didn't help me? Huh, huh? And when I falled overboard, you didn't help me. And then when the monkey grabbed me, you didn't even care about my boo-boo.
[tearing up]
Lil DeVille
Face it, Tommy. You don't got a bestest friend no more. All you gots is a brother.
Tommy Pickles
Oh, um...fine. I'll go find him by myself.
[dejected in tears, then decided; goes off to find Dil]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing Big Brother Responsibilities
Stu Pickles
We weren't going to give you this until you were a little bit older, but I think now's the right time. Shiny, huh? And Grandpa Lou put your picture inside. I know it's hard, Tommy. You have a little brother now, and that's a big change. Uh, Dil can be pretty tough to get along with, huh? But sometimes little brothers, they aren't everything you'd hoped they'd be. That's why big brothers have got to have faith. And one day, you'll see...he'll change. After all... you've got responsibility now. I know I can trust that you'll stick by Dil's side and be a swell big brother.
[after setting him on the workbench; holds out a pocket watch and gives it to Tommy; opens the watch to reveal a taped photo of Tommy and Dil inside; Tommy looks at it, intrigued; Tommy scowls and puts down the watch; opens a drawer, then pulls out a picture of himself and Drew, when they were kids; puts a chain on the watch; puts Tommy on his lap]
Tommy Pickles
Sponsatility...
[looks at the watch in his hands; thinking]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Press Conference with Mr. Pickles
Reporter
There he is!
Reporter #1
Mr. Pickles, is it true you shipped your own children to Tokyo in a wooden box?
Reporter #2
Is it true a dingo ate your baby?
Reporter #3
Mr. Pickles, how many pecks of pickled peppers did you pick?
Rex Pester
Childhood, a time of innocence, a time of joy. A time of unspeakable, unrelenting tragedy. Mrs. Pickles, tell us how it feels to know you may never see your children again.
[first words]
Betty DeVille
Criminy! Can't you pit bulls show some compassion?
[disgusted]
Rex Pester
I'm so sorry. Forgive me. Please tell us how it feels to know you may never see your children again.
[back to Didi]
Betty DeVille
All right! That's it! Let me at him! All right! Come one! Come on!
[glares. She charges at at Rex. Lou and Stu hold her back]
Charlotte Pickles
Hold on, Jonathan. There's an alarming crowd at my in-law's indicating either a yard sale or a family tragedy. Let me get back to you.
Rex Pester
Mr. Pickles, how does it feel knowing your brother lost your only daughter?
Drew Pickles
He what?!
[Furiously]
Rex Pester
Share your pain.
Drew Pickles
YAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
[his face boils red. He angrily lunges at Stu and violently fights him]
Stu Pickles
YOU'RE BREAKING MY ARM!!
Drew Pickles
ONLY CAUSE I CAN'T REACH YOUR NECK!!!
Rex Pester
And there you have it. 2 sour Pickles and: young Tammy, baby Dale, the twins Bill and Jill, little Chunky, and poor Amelia, all vanished without a trace. I'm Rex Pester, and I'll be back with more "Big Action News"!
[goes back to the camera; displays the pictures of the babies, one by one, while incorrectly saying their names; caption "Rex Pester, Big Action News"]
Chaz Finster
Mr. Swenson on Saton said he saw Angelica and Spike run through his garden and head north on I-99!
[rushes in]
Charlotte Pickles
My baby!
Didi Pickles
Let's go!
Lou Pickles
Private First Class Pickles reporting for duty!
[saluting]
Chaz Finster
Just get in! Come on!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Adventure and Concerns Among Friends
Tommy Pickles
Forward, march! We are going up the hill!
[pulls the wagon up the hill, while Chuckie, Phil and Lil push from behind. Dil is inside the wagon, drinking his juice box. They sing in an army chant]
Lil DeVille
We go back there without Dil!
Tommy Pickles
But you guys, he's not so bad.
Chuckie Finster
A frighty thing, he needs a bath.
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Rugrats
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Rugrats
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Sometimes, he is lots of fun.
Phil DeVille
He's a big pain in our buns!
Tommy Pickles
Chuckie, do you think so, too?
Chuckie Finster
I just got a big boo boo!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Rugrats
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Rugrats
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
He's just a baby, don't you see?
Lil DeVille
We love to leave him in a tree!
Tommy Pickles
He'll get better when he's grown.
Phil DeVille
We'd like to feed him to a toad!
Tommy Pickles
Don't you think he's kind of sweet?
Lil DeVille
All he does is poop and eat!
Tommy Pickles
Chuckie, don't you like him too?
Chuckie Finster
I got a rock inside my shoe!
[takes off his right shoe and pulls out a rock]
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Phil and Lil
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh!
Phil and Lil
Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh! Nah-uh!
Phil and Lil
Uh-huh! Uh-huh!
Tommy Pickles
Nah-uh! Nah-uh!
Phil and Lil
Uh-huh! Uh-huh!
Phil DeVille
Hey! Stop squirting. Oops.
[he Lil fall to the ground. Tommy lets go of the lead. The wagon rolls down the hill, narrowly missing Chuckie]
Lil DeVille
Goodbye, baby.
[waves]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Searching for Tommy's New Sister
Rugrats
Oh!
Chuckie Finster
Tommy, somebody's been coloring your room.
Tommy Pickles
Yep, it's for my new sister.
Phil DeVille
How are we gonna find her, Tommy?
Chuckie Finster
Yeah, we don't even know what she looks like.
Lil DeVille
Well, she's a girl like me, so we know she'll be prettyful.
Angelica Pickles
Oh, brother! You dumb babies got a lot to learn about the facts of life. Now, get out of my way. I gotta get back to the dessert table before the grownups get all the good stuff.
[enters, carrying a big bunch of cookies using the lower part of her dress; shoves babies en route to table; dumps the cookies on the table]
Tommy Pickles
Angelica, can you help us find my baby sister?
Angelica Pickles
I wouldn't be in such a big hurry if I was you, Tommy. Cause when the new baby gets here, she's gonna gets all the toys and the love and the attention. And your mommy and daddy will forget all about you. It'll be like, "Look, Deed...there's that little bald kid in the house again.
Tommy Pickles
My mommy and daddy won't forget me.
Angelica Pickles
That's what Spike said before you were born. Back when his name was Paul.
Tommy Pickles
Paul?
Angelica Pickles
Yeah, but, then you came along and they put him out in the rain and he turned into a dog.
Tommy Pickles
That's not gonna happen to me, Angelica. My mommy and daddy will love me no matter what!
Susie Carmichael
A baby is very neat, a baby is a special treat.
[singing]
Angelica Pickles
Ugh! Who does Susie Carmichael think she is?
[looks on from Tommy's room]
Susie Carmichael
A baby has lots of toes, a baby has a tiny nose. A baby is a little dickens, a baby is a cuddly chicken. A baby is lots of joy.
[singing; Angelica leaves while the other babies watch from inside. Cut to outside. All are singing, unless specified; Angelica is next to Didi's belly, chuckling, as she plans to make her move]
Angelica Pickles
A baby will get all the toys!
[singing; barging in obnoxiously]
Susie Carmichael
What are you doing? A baby has a smiley face...
[whispers; continues singing]
Angelica Pickles
A baby is from outside space!
[singing]
Susie Carmichael
Angelica!
[whispers]
Angelica Pickles
Susie!
[whispers]
Susie Carmichael
A baby is extra fancy.
[singing]
Angelica Pickles
A baby poops in his pantsies!
[singing; laughs]
Susie Carmichael
Cut it out!
Angelica Pickles
No!
Susie Carmichael
Like a birdie, singing in a tree!
[singing]
Angelica Pickles
More like Reptar, screaming in your ear!
[singing obnoxiously]
Both
A baby is a gift, a gift from a Bob! A baby is a gift from a Bob, Bob, Bob! A baby is a gift.
[singing]
Susie Carmichael
A gift from a Bob!
[singing]
Chuckie Finster
Do you really think babies are a gift from a Bob?
Tommy Pickles
I don't know. Why?
Chuckie Finster
Because if Bob bringed a gift, it's probably one of them.
[points to the baby shower gifts on a nearby table]
Susie Carmichael
A baby is very special!
[singing]
Angelica Pickles
A baby is, is NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT!!!!!
[singing]
Didi Pickles
Oh! Betty, it's time!
[painfully groans in discomfort]
Betty DeVille
It's time? Oh, boy. Everybody to your stations, people! Howard, get Stu. Charlotte, call the hospital. Deed, start your breathing. Come on, good girl.
Lou Pickles
Up we go, sprout. We got a Pickle to deliver.
[picks up Tommy]
Howard DeVille
Let's go to the car, kids.
[picks up his twins]
Charlotte Pickles
Would somebody turn that sprinkler off?!
Lou Pickles
Now, that's what I call a "baby shower!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Newborn's Arrival in the Rugrats Family
Lucy Carmichael
All right, Didi, you can do it. Push now! Have we got a good reading on the EFM?
[to the staff]
Lucy Carmichael
Here it comes. Gorgeous!
Stu Pickles
Deed, she's so beautiful. She's...She's a boy!
Didi Pickles
Hello, my wonderful, sweet baby boy.
Stu Pickles
Well, I guess we won't be naming him after my mother.
Didi Pickles
He doesn't look much like a Trixie. What about my cousin Dylan?
Stu Pickles
Dylan Prescott Pickles. Hmm.
Nurse
Dil Pickles.
Stu Pickles
Yeah...I like it.
Lou Pickles
Here you go, sprout.
[gently puts down Tommy next to Didi]
Didi Pickles
Tommy, I want you to meet someone very special. This is your brother, Dylan. Dil, this is Tommy.
Tommy Pickles
Baby...
[gasps in wonder; reaches his hand out]
Didi Pickles
See? They already love each other.
Betty DeVille
Well, that's a start.
[to Chaz]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Cynthia Sweet Bar Discovery Among Friends
Lou Pickles
Bingo! Lookie here! A wrapper from a Cynthia Sweet bar.
[finds a clue on the ground, and picks up a wrapper]
Drew Pickles
My angel! She's been here!
Lou Pickles
Yep, I figure she's tracking the sprouts. It's the Pickles blood. I myself spent 15 days tracking Sitting Bull through the Northwest Territory. The year was 19...
Howard DeVille
Over here!
[he and Chaz return with news of another clue]
Chaz Finster
We found some wheel tracks and baby footprints heading into the woods. Well, actually, Howard found them. Honestly, I saw them.
Stu Pickles
They must be in my Reptar Wagon.
Drew Pickles
It's the perfect children's toy!" You and your stupid inventions!
[sarcastically, angrily mimicking his brother]
Stu Pickles
My stupid inventions? That's it!
[thinking; brightens]
Betty DeVille
All right, the pups are in the woods. You men follow those tracks. We'll head to the ranger station and start the search from there. NOW MOVE! HUT, HUT, HUT!
[grabs a bullhorn from a policeman and speaks into it]
Didi Pickles
Stu, where are you going?!
Stu Pickles
Trust me, Deed. I have a plan!
[drives off with Lou and Chaz]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Search for the Missing Children
Didi Pickles
Oh, we'll never find them! Can't you do something?!
[crying]
Ranger Margaret
Come on, baby. Come on!
Stu Pickles
Sky Pickle to ground Pickle!
[on CB]
Didi Pickles
Stu, Stu, is that you?!
Stu Pickles
Roger that, Deed! We have aerial search!
[collides into a flock of ducks]
Tommy Pickles
Oh, no. N-Nice monkeys. Ohh.
Phil DeVille
Not so fast you monkeys!
Tommy Pickles
Lil! Phil! You came back! Oh, but-but where's...
[hugging them both]
Reptar Wagon
Grrr! I am Reptar, the perfect children's toy!
Tommy Pickles
Chuckie!
Chuckie Finster
Hi, Tommy! Hey, monkeys! You want nanners? Well, come and get'em!
[to Tommy; reaches for a jar of abby food in the wagon; runs with the banana baby food, with the monkeys following him]
Lil DeVille
Gosh, I never knowed he was so brave.
Phil DeVille
Yeah. We're gonna miss him. Well, we better get in the wagon and get outta here.
Tommy Pickles
No! You guys take Dil and go look for the lizard. I gotta go help my bestest friend.
[starts walking around with his watch]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Chaos Among Friends and Monkeys
Angelica Pickles
Ohh! Aah! Ooh! Dumb dog. There's no babies around here. Aah! There you are! Hand over my Cynthia, Finster!
[lands near the crashed-circus train; losing her hat in the process; crashes into Chuckie, who gasped]
Chuckie Finster
Run, Angelica! The monkeys are coming! The monkeys are coming!
[runs away]
Angelica Pickles
Huh? Cynthia! Hey! Ohh! Stop!
[confused; getting trampled by the monkeys. One of the monkeys conveniently drop Cynthia near her; another monkey tries to steal Cynthia; grabs the monkey by the tail, and is once again towed away]
Tommy Pickles
Spike! You found me!
[relieved]
Chuckie Finster
Ugh! Oh! Ohh! Nice monkeys. Nice monkeys. I was only kidding. Don't be mad at me. Please? Okay. Help.
[the monkeys pounce onto him and try to lick the food off. Tommy and Spike come to the rescue; they chase the monkeys away]
Chuckie Finster
Tommy! Thank goodness!
Tommy Pickles
Come on, Chuckie! Chuckie! The lizard's house! Let's find the others! We gots a lizard to see!
[pulls out his pocket watch and points it at the direction of a fire tower]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey. Ohh! Ohh! Spike! I can't look! I can't look!
Tommy Pickles
Spike! Spike!
Dil Pickles
My ball!
[pulls the brakes, and the wagon runs off]
Chuckie Finster
Don't let them take me, Tommy! I don't wanna be monkey boy!
[the monkey tries to pull his hair]
Phil and Lil
Aah!
[as the monkeys try to pull their clothes]
Tommy Pickles
Aah!
[as the monkey tries to pull his shirt]
Reptar Wagon
Hang onto your diapies, babies. Grr!
Phil DeVille
Good one, Dil!
Tommy and Lil
Thanks, Dilly. Woo, hoo, hoo!
Tommy Pickles
Thanks, Dil!
Lil DeVille
Dilly, you're my hero! Bye-bye, monkeys!
[kisses Dil]
Angelica Pickles
Aah! Oh! Stop it! Cynthia! Hey, you stupid diaper bag! Wait for me! Dumb monkeys! After all I've done for you babies, you were gonna leave me and Cynthia beh- HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNDD!!!!!!!
[bites the monkey's tail. The monkey runs off in pain, leaving Cynthia behind. She picks up Cynthia and kisses it; the Reptar Wagon passes by; Phil and Lil fend off 2 monkeys as she hops on the wagon's tail; the wagon goes on some railroad tracks, crashing a "Do Not Enter" sign and going through a tunnel. Then, it goes on a rickety old bridge over the river; the wagon hits a missing board on the bridge, catapults her and her doll off in the air]
Phil DeVille
I didn't know she could fly.
Lil DeVille
I think it's cause she's a witch.
Tommy Pickles
Hang on, Angelica!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Coughing Leads to Unexpected Chaos
Didi Pickles
And then the wizard looked down at the little boy and said: "your wish has been granted". And the little boy looked...
Stu Pickles
Deed! Help!
[enters with the still-crying Dil]
Didi Pickles
I'll be back, sweetie.
[to Tommy]
Stu Pickles
All I did was cough, Deed. I tried not to, but I had a feeling in my throat. And then I coughed! And now he's crying! And now he's got the hiccups!
[Dil hiccups; sobs]
Didi Pickles
Oh, Stu. Stu, why don't you sing Dil a lullaby?
[places a baby pacifier into Stu's mouth. He stops crying and sucks on it; she cranks a baby mobile]
Stu Pickles
I'm too tired to sing...
[spits out the pacifier]
Didi Pickles
All right. I'll make something up.
Stu Pickles
Good.
Didi Pickles
Baby, please, rest your head.
[singing]
Stu Pickles
Yeah...now it is time for bed.
[singing]
Didi Pickles
That's good.
[spoken]
Stu Pickles
Thanks.
[spoken]
Didi Pickles
You're cuter than, uh...
Stu Pickles
Uncle Ned!
[singing; chuckles]
Didi Pickles
Our little...
[singing]
Stu Pickles
Uh...quadruped?
[singing]
Didi Pickles
Oh, Stu...
[spoken]
Stu Pickles
Oh.
[spoken]
Didi Pickles
It didn't work.
[spoken]
Stu Pickles
I know.
[spoken]
Didi Pickles
He's still awake.
[spoken]
Stu Pickles
I got one. I got one.
[spoken]
Didi Pickles
Okay.
[spoken; hands Dil off to Stu]
Stu Pickles
Twinkle! Twinkle! How times flies...
[singing; dances with Dil in his arms]
Didi Pickles
Slowly in the starry skies.
[singing]
Stu Pickles
Baby, please, close your eyes!
[singing; getting his eye very close to Dil]
Didi Pickles
Shh, shh, shh...you're as sweet as...
[singing]
Stu Pickles
Apple pies!
[singing]
Didi Pickles
As you grow, and love and play...
[tucks Dil in his crib as he hiccups again]
Stu Pickles
In our hearts, you'll always stay.
[singing]
Didi Pickles
So sleep and dream the night away...ayy...
[singing; leans her head on the side of Dil's crib. lights are turned out. Dil falls asleep. She kisses Dil]
Stu Pickles
Ah, that was good.
[spoken]
Tommy Pickles
Baby, please, rest your head. Now it is time for bed. Please stop. Don't you see? I want mom and dad for me.
[singing; shed some tears while holding the slipper close to himself and hugs it]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Sibling Dispute Over Shared Resources
Dil Pickles
Mine! Mine!
[steals the baby bottle; drinks the whole milk]
Tommy Pickles
But, I'm hungry, too. Stop it! Dil, that's enough! Stop it! Unh! You didn't leave any for me!
[tries to grab the bottle from Dil; Dil laughs and finishes off the bottle]
Dil Pickles
All gone.
[burp; giggles]
Tommy Pickles
Oh. Dil. Dil!
[Dil's leg peeks out of the blanket; Dil's arm now peeks out]
Dil Pickles
My blankie! My blankie!
[grabs the blanket from Tommy and covers himself with it]
Tommy Pickles
Dil!
Dil Pickles
My blankie! My blankie!
Tommy Pickles
I need some blankie, too.
[pulls the blanket on opposite ends, carrying Dil]
Dil Pickles
Mine! Mine! Mine!
[doing the "tug of war"]
Tommy Pickles
Mine!
Dil Pickles
Mine! Yucky lookie.
[the blanket tears and Tommy falls into a mud puddle, covering himself in mud; giggles]
Tommy Pickles
You think it's funny?! Phil and Lil was right! You're a bad, naughty baby, and you're never gonna get any better! I'm through being your big brother! I don't want my sponsativity no more!
[getting out of the mud puddle, angry; tosses his watch against a tree, the clock opens the picture]
Dil Pickles
Monkey! My monkey! Mine!
Tommy Pickles
You want monkeys?! Oh, Okay! I'll give you monkeys! You'll have a monkey mommy and a monkey daddy and a monkey brother! I shoulda let my friends take you back to the hopsicle, but, no, I said, "He didn't mean it", I said! "He was only playing"! Well I was wrong! Now I don't even have friends! Dil wants monkeys, and monkeys want the nanners. So everybody gets what they want!
[still angry; kicks a frog; kicks an empty baby bottle; tosses out a diaper, a container of baby powder, baby wipes and Cynthia, which the monkeys all grab; brings the baby food to Dil and prepares to use it to cover Dil]
Dil Pickles
My nanna! My nanna! T-T-T-
[then looks at Tommy, while lightning strikes above. He's very frightened]
Tommy Pickles
I'm sorry, Dil.
[regrets himself]
Dil Pickles
Toto.
[tearfully]
Tommy Pickles
It's okay, Dil. Everything is gonna be okay.
[carrying Dil back to the shelter]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Navigating with Confidence and Friendship
Chuckie Finster
Do you think we'll still be able to find the lizard's house, Tommy?
Tommy Pickles
Sure, Chuckie. Long as I got my sponsatility, we'll never be losted.
Phil DeVille
Which way are we apposed to go?
Tommy
Um...uh...um...that way.
[uses his watch to find his way]
Chuckie Finster
Hey, lookie, footprints. Maybe there's other babies around here.
Lil DeVille
Those are our feetprints, Chuckie.
Phil DeVille
You're leading us around and around, Tommy.
Tommy Pickles
But it was working before.
Lil DeVille
I don't think it ever worked. I think your sponsatility's broke, just like your brother.
Tommy Pickles
My brother is not broke!
Lil DeVille
He pulled the lever!
Phil DeVille
He tried to send us into the big Jacuzzi!
Lil DeVille
We could have been drowned.
Chucklie Finster
Hey, you guys! Clow-clow...
[as he covers his ears to avoid the argument, he spots something and points in fear]
Lil DeVille
What is it, Chuckie?
Chuckie Finster
CLOWN!!
[points to a rail car with a clown's face painted on it]
Phil DeVille
What's a train doing in the middle of the forest?
Lil DeVille
Maybe some giant baby losted his choo-choo.
Circus Monkeys
Ooh, eek! Ooh-ahh-ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang! Ooh-ee! Ooh-ahh-ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang!
[singing; 4 more monkeys emerge from the top of the car. One of them is wearing a yellow hat, another is wearing a pink dress and carrying a parasol, and the 3rd monkey is an infant wearing a diaper]
Devo
You want to learn something that I can teach to you. You want to know a secret that I swear is true. Monkeys, we have more fun than humans ever do!
[singing; a monkey holds onto Chuckie while another monkey, in a tree, pulls by its tail]
Circus Monkeys
Ooh, eee, ooh ahh ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang! Ooh, eee, ooh ahh ahh! Ting, tang walla walla bing bang!
[singing; a monkey takes Tommy away in a trike. 2 more monkeys, one of them with a bow on her head, walk on their hands while Phil and Lil ride on their feet. They crash down]
Devo
We learn to climb and swing before we learn to run. We like to party and there's room for everyone. Come by and see if you really wanna have some fun.
[singing]
Circus Monkeys
Ooh, eee, ooh-ahh-ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang. Ooh, eee, ooh ahh ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang!
[singing; the parasol monkey parachutes off the top of the car, with her baby holding on. Phil and Lil follow with a skeleton of a parasol, but crashes]
Devo
You'll never see us tired cause we're way too smart for workin'. A monkey knows a lot more than a man. We love swinging in the trees and eating our bananas. Don't you know we never need a plan?
[singing; 3 monkeys hold onto Chuckie as he dives down; his glasses land onto Dil's head. The monkey with a parasol swipes the glasses and Dil's bottle, and feeds it to a baby monkey]
Dil Pickles
Mine! Mine!
Tommy Pickles
What? What do you want?
Dil Pickles
Hungry, hungry.
Circus Monkeys
Ooh, eee, ooh ahh ahh! Ting, tang, walla walla bing bang! Ooh, eee, ooh ahh ahh...
[singing]
Tommy Pickles
Oh, but I really wanna go play with the monkeys.
[digs in the duffel bag, grunts, and opens a jar of banana baby food. He gives it to Dil]
Dil Pickles
Hungry, hungry. Oh, boy.
[eating the banana baby food; giggles, and makes a mess of himself]
Tommy Pickles
Watch my brother! I gotta get the diapie bag!
[leaves]
Chuckie Finster
Hey, leave him alone. He's not a nanner. Oh, no! Hey, guys, help! There's a monkey who's trying to take Tommy's brother!
[tries to pull Dil away from the monkeys]
Phil DeVille
So?
Chuckie Finster
Oh, just help me, okay? Don't touch my hair! Hey! Let go!
[to the monkeys; Dil flies into Phil and Lil's arms, but a monkey in a tree tries to steal him. Meanwhile, he tries to take his glasses back from the baby monkey]
Phil and Lil DeVille
Okay.
[mishearing; both let go of Dil's legs. Lil shrugged to her twin brother]
Chuckie Finster
Oh, this is just great. I tell you, it can't get any worser than, this.
[ambles around near him; accidentally steps on his glasses, cracking the lenses; puts it back on]
Phil DeVille
Well, at least the monkeys are gone.
Lil DeVille
Yeah. And they took baby Dil with them.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Excitement Over Reptar's Arrival
Phil and Lil
Wow!
Chuckie Finster
What is that, you guys?
Lil DeVille
Reptar!
Phil DeVille
On wheels!
Chuckie Finster
What do you think it's for?
Phil DeVille
I don't know.
Lil DeVille
I bet it could take us to the baby store.
[climbs into the wagon]
Phil DeVille
Great idea, Lillian. We could take Dil to the hopsicle and get Tommy's money back.
Lil DeVille
Yeah, it's money back bearanteed.
[climbs out]
Chuckie Finster
Guys! Guys, Tommy's not gonna be happy about this.
Lil DeVille
Well, he's sure not happy now.
[while he and Lili lug Dil towards the wagon and places him in there]
Chuckie Finster
Well...
Lil DeVille
You watch. Once Dil goes back to the baby store, Tommy will be happy here.
Chuckie Finster
I don't know about this.
Tommy Pickles
What are you doing?
[enters the room]
Phil DeVille
We, uh, actually, Lillian was, uh...
Lil DeVille
We're taking Dil back to the hopsicle, Tommy. We're gonna get your moneys back.
Tommy Pickles
What?! You can't do that. My mommy and daddy wanna keep him!
Chuckie Finster
See? See?
Phil DeVille
Why? All he does is cry and poop.
Tommy Pickles
Well, so do you.
Phil DeVille
I don't cry that much!
Tommy Pickles
Well, you poop an awful lot!
Phil DeVille
Look who's talking, Mr. Chocolate Pants!
Tommy Pickles
I am not a poopie monster!
Announcer
..."Shirley-lock Holmes, Girl Detective", right after these messages.
Lil DeVille
Poopie, poopie, poopie.
Phil DeVille
We thought you'd be happy, Tommy!
Tommy Pickles
Well, I'm not!
Angelica Pickles
Hey, babies. Knock it off! Cynthia and me are trying to watch TV! Huh? Hey, hands off the merchandise, pinkie.
[Dil sees Cynthia and swipes her from her]
Phil and Lil
Pretty good.
Tommy Pickles
Be nice, Angelica. He didn't mean it.
Angelica Pickles
You wanna ride in a wagon? I'll give you a ride...to outside space! Ow! My show! Next commercial, you babies are in big trouble!
[grabs Tommy by his collar; drops Tommy into the wagon; kicks the Reptar Wagon, which moves towards the front door, hurting her foot; hopping while holding her foot in pain, her hears on the TV that the show is out of commercials; slams the door]
Lil DeVille
All aboard!
Chuckie Finster
Just walk away, Chuckie. Walk away. Ooh! Wait for me!
[to himself, as the Reptar Wagon rides outside, carrying the babies; to the babiess; climbs into the moving Reptar Wagon, which has now left the house, down the street]
Phil DeVille
Which way to the hospicle?
Tommy Pickles
We're not going to the hospicle!
Chuckie Finster
Well, we're going somewhere!
United Express Driver
Uh, pardon me. Pickup for Pickles to Japan?
Lou Pickles
Take it away, take it away.
[yawning]
United Express Driver
Yeah, have a good day.
Angelica Pickles
Pipe down, Spike! Me and Cynthia are watching... Cynthia? Nice try, babies. Now gimme back my... CYNTHIAAAA!
[notices that Cynthia is missing; proceeds to the front door; gasps; sees that the babies and the Reptar Wagon are gone. She only sees Cynthia's shoe on the welcome mat]
Angelica Pickles
They took Cynthia, Spike! Come on! You're gonna be my butt-hound! We gotta search every doghouse, playhouse, tree house and doll house! I want those foogitives back in custardy. Whoa! Bad dog! Bad dog! STOP!
[unties the leash from the doghouse; Spike runs off, with her in tow]
Stu Pickles
Deed, just go to the spa and relax. Pop and I are doing fine taking care of the, uh... Pop, where's the crate?
[on the phone; sees that the crate's gone]
Lou Pickles
Oh, I guess the delivery folks must've come.
[wakes up]
Stu Pickles
Wow. They loaded her up and everything, huh?
Didi Pickles
Stu, let me talk to Tommy.
[on phone]
Stu Pickles
Sure, I'll let you talk to Tommy. Pop...uh...uh, where are the kids?
Lou Pickles
That's funny. They were here a minute ago, playing in the...
Stu and Lou
THE CRATE!
[look outside the open front door]
Stu Pickles
Uh, Honey...I'm gonna have to...call you back.
[hangs up, then glares at Lou in anger]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Childhood Memories and Misunderstandings Among Friends
Chuckie Finster
Oh, darn.
Lou Pickles
Hey, sprouts, crate's no place for you to play. You wouldn't want to get shipped to Japan with Reptar, now would you? I better put this where I can keep an eye on it.
[dumps the babies out of the crate, picks it up, and moves it to the next room]
Chuckie Finster
Dil, that's Tommy's blankie.
Tommy Pickles
Yeah, it used to sleep with me before we even got you.
Dil Pickles
My blankie!
[hits Tommy with his rattle]
Chuckie Finster
He's not very nice. Ow!
[Dil hits him with the rattle]
Lil DeVille
That's not how you get things from a brother, Tommy.
Tommy Pickles
It's not?
Lil DeVille
No, it's not. Here, watch.
[shoves Tommy and Chuckie, then tries to take a Reptar doll from Phil]
Phil DeVille
Hey, that's my Reptar, Lillian!
Lil DeVille
Is not, Phillip!
Phil DeVille
Is too, Lillian!
Lil DeVille
Is not!
Phil DeVille
Is too!
Lil DeVille
Is not! See, Tommy? Now you try it.
[tosses Phil to the floor. The arguing immediately stops]
Dil Pickles
Teddy mine!
Tommy Pickles
Mine!
Dil Pickles
Mine!
Tommy Pickles
Mine!
Dil Pickles
Mine!
Tommy Pickles
Mine!
Dil Pickles
Mine!
[hits Tommy on the head with his rattle]
Phil DeVille
Gosh, Tommy learns fast.
Lil DeVille
Yeah.
Stu Pickles
Hurry, Pop, they'll be here to pick it up any minute.
Angelica Pickles
Daddy, why can't I watch Shirley-Lock Holmes at our house? I'll never be able to hear it with that new baby squawking the whole time!
Drew Pickles
Now, sweetheart, Daddy's gotta put in a little overtime today, so that Mommy won't be so ashamed of his quarterly earnings.
Angelica Pickles
Hi, Uncle Stu. Sorry to hear your pony is so slow.
Stu Pickles
But we don't have a pony Angelica.
Angelica Pickles
Then how come you told Mommy, Aunt Didi got saddled with a loser?
[to Drew]
Stu Pickles
Loser?
Drew Pickles
He-He...I...
[laughs nervously]
Stu Pickles
Excuse me, bro. My tax deductions are CRYING!
[angrily slams the door]
Drew Pickles
YOU CAN'T DEDUCT THEM IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANY INCOME!
[furiously opens the door again and angrily puts Angelica's things inside; slams the door]
Stu Pickles
Tommy! Dil! Boys, what are you doing?!
Chuckie Finster
Ohh...
Stu Pickles
Dil...let's say we give Tommy a little turn with the bear, huh? Or not. Hey, champ, why don't you come with me for a minute? I got something to show you that's even better than your old teddy bear.
[tries to take the teddy bear, causing Dil to start wailing; returns the teddy bear to Dil. This stops Dil's crying, but now Tommy cries; picks up Tommy; takes him to his workshop]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.