Up (2009) - Quotes

Taglines: From the director of Monsters, Inc.

Taglines: Adventure is out there!

Taglines: The greatest adventure is just getting back home.

Taglines: Fly up to Venezula!

Camp Master Strauch: ...and by receiving their badges, the following Explorers will graduate to Senior Explorers. For Extreme Mountaineering Lore. Congratulations, Jimmy. For Wild Animal Defensive Arts. Congratulations, Brandon. For Assisting the Elderly... Uh, Russell? Is there someone that...

Carl Fredricksen: [to Camp Master] Excuse me. Pardon me. Old man coming through. I'm here for him.

Camp Master Strauch: Congratulations, Russell. Sir...

Carl Fredricksen: Russell, for assisting the elderly, and for performing above and beyond the call of duty, I would like to award you the highest honor I can bestow: The Ellie Badge.

Russell: Wow.

Camp Master Strauch: Alright, I think that covers everybody... So let's give a big Explorer Call to our brand new Senior Wilderness Explorers! Ready everybody!

All: Caw, caw, raar! Caw, caw, raar!

Alpha: [After Dug put the Cone of Shame on Alpha which his deep voice from translator broke, all dogs gasp] I will have many enjoyments from what I am about to do, Dug.

Dog: [shocked] He wears the Cone of Shame?!

Alpha: [in a squeaky voice; [The Fox and the Hound|Do not just continue sitting, attack!!!; all the dogs started laughing] What, what? ] But, no, no! Stop your laughing! Get this off of me!

Dug: [Alpha obeys, so do the dogs] Listen, you dog! SIT!

Dogs: Yes, Alpha.

Dug: Alpha"? I am not Alpha, he is...Oh.

Russell: Oh, I can't do it!

Carl Fredricksen: Russell!

Russell: Huh?

Carl Fredricksen: Caw, caw, raar! Caw, caw, raar!

Russell: [to the fighter dogs] You leave Mr. Fredricksen alone! Hey, squirrel!

Gamma: Squirrel? Where? Where's the squirrel? I hate squirrels.

Carl Fredricksen: [hears a knock on his door en route to rescue Russell; opens the door to find Dug] Russell? Dug!

Dug: I was hiding under your porch because I love you. Can I stay?

Carl Fredricksen: Can you stay? Well, you're my dog, aren't you? And I'm your master!

Dug: [happily; jumps on Carl in joy] You are my master?! Oh, boy, oh, boy!

Carl Fredricksen: Good boy, Dug! You're a good boy!

Russell: Yes! Don't worry, Kevin. I'll save...

Charles F. Muntz: And they wouldn't believe me. Just wait until they get a good look at you.

Alpha: Master, the small mailman has returned.

Charles F. Muntz: What?

Russell: Let me go.

Charles F. Muntz: Where's your elderly friend?

Russell: [bitterly] He's not my friend anymore.

Charles F. Muntz: Well, if you're here, Fredricksen can't be far behind.

Russell: Where are you keeping Kevin? Let me go!

Beta: Scream all you want, small mailman.

Gamma: None of your mailman friends can hear you.

Russell: I'll unleash all my Wilderness Explorer training!

Charles F. Muntz: Alpha, Fredricksen is coming back! Guard that bird! If you see the old man, you know what to do!

Russell: Hey, where are you going?! I'm not finished with you!

Charles F. Muntz: Nice talking with you.

Russell: Aah!

Charles F. Muntz: Where are you, Fredricksen?

Carl Fredricksen: [a shadow crosses Carl. He looks up to see Russell floating off, hanging from a bunch of balloons] Russell? Russell!

Russell: [furiously; fires up the leaf blowers and steers himself off to the sky] I'm gonna help Kevin, even if you won't!

Carl Fredricksen: No, Russell! No! (Wait!)

Russell: [Kevin gets caught by a net; Kevin falls over] Run, Kevin! Run! Oh No!

Carl Fredricksen: [cuts only one price of rope] Russell, give me your knife!

Charles F. Muntz: [throws a lantern on his house to burn it] Get away from my bird!

Carl Fredricksen: [gasps] No!

Russell: No!

Charles F. Muntz: Careful, we will want her in good shape for my return.

Russell: Let her go! Stop! KEVIN!!! You gave away Kevin. You just...gave her away.

Carl Fredricksen: [gets angry] This is none of my concern. I DIDN'T ASK FOR ANY OF THIS!!!

Dug: [walks to Carl] Master, it's all right.

Carl Fredricksen: [Dug sadly walks away] I AM NOT YOUR MASTER!!! AND IF YOU HADN'T HAVE SHOWN UP NONE OF THIS WOULD'VE HAPPENED!!! BAD DOG!!! BAD DOG!!! Now whether you assist me or not, I am going to Paradise Falls, if it kills me.

Russell: [angrily; throws his sash on the ground] Here. I don't want this anymore.

Charles F. Muntz: [groans] You lost them?

Beta: No, it was Dug.

Gamma: He's with them, he helps them escape.

Charles F. Muntz: [grunting angrily] Wait. Wait a minute. Dug.

Carl Fredricksen: See anything?

Dug: No, my pack is not following us. Boy, they are dumb.

Carl Fredricksen: This is crazy. I finally meet my childhood hero, and he's trying to kill us. What a joke!

Dug: Hey, I know a joke. A squirrel walks up to a tree and says I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead. Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Carl Fredricksen: Careful, Russell.

Russell: You okay, Kevin? You know what, Mr. Fredricksen? The wilderness isn't quite what I expected.

Carl Fredricksen: Yeah? How so?

Russell: It's kind of... wild. I mean, it's not how they made it sound in my book.

Carl Fredricksen: Hmm, get used to that, kid.

Russell: My dad made it sound so easy. He's really good at camping, and how to make fire from rocks and stuff. He used to come to all my Sweat Lodge meetings. And afterwards we'd go get ice cream at Fentons. I always get chocolate and he gets butter-brickle. Then we'd sit on this one curb, right outside, and I'll count all the blue cars, and he counts all the red ones, and whoever gets the most wins. I like that curb. That might sound boring, but I think the boring stuff is the stuff I remember the most.

Charles F. Muntz: Most of the collection is housed in the world's top museums: New York, Munich, London... Of course, I kept the best for myself.

Carl Fredricksen: Did you ever! Will you look at that?

Charles F. Muntz: Oh, yes, the Arsinoitherium. Beast charged while I was brushing my teeth. Used my shaving kit to bring him down. Oh, surprise me. The only way to get it out of Ethiopia at the time was to have it declared as "dental equipment"!

Carl Fredricksen: Oh my gosh, the Giant Somalian Leopard Tortoise!

Charles F. Muntz: Oh, you recognize it? I'm impressed! That's an interesting story there... Hm, excellent choice. I found it on safari with Roosevelt. He and I fell into a habit of playing gin rummy in the evenings, and did he cheat? Oh, he was horrible!

Alpha: [high-pitched voice] Master, dinner is ready.

Charles F. Muntz: Oh, dear, broken translator again. It's that loose wire again. There you go, big fella.

Alpha: [deep scary voice] Thank you, Master.

Russell: I liked his other voice.

Charles F. Muntz: Well, dinner is served! Right this way. So, how are things stateside, huh? Almost tempted to go back a few times, but I have unfinished work here. Please, I hope you're hungry, because Epsilon is the finest chef I've ever had. Oh, Epsilon, you've done it again!

Russell: Yes!! Hey! Hey!

Carl Fredricksen: Oh, my Ellie would've loved all this. You know, it's because of you she had this dream to come down here and live by Paradise Falls.

Charles F. Muntz: I'm honored. And now you've made it.

Carl Fredricksen: You sure we're not a bother? I'd hate to impose.

Charles F. Muntz: No, no! It's a pleasure to have guests- a real treat.

Dog Walla: Treat?! Treat! I want a treat!

Charles F. Muntz: No, no, quiet! Calm down. Calm down...

Russell: Hey!

Charles F. Muntz: I shouldn't have used that word... Having guests is a delight. More often I get thieves, come to steal what's rightfully mine.

Carl Fredricksen: No!

Charles F. Muntz: [picks up the lantern; illuminates the room, revealing a skeleton of Kevin's species, festooned with maps of the area] They called me a fraud, those... But once I bring back this creature, my name will be cleared! Beautiful, isn't it? Oh, I've spent a lifetime tracking it. Sometimes, years go by between sightings. I've tried to smoke it out of that deathly labyrinth where it lives. You can't go in after it. Once in, there's no way out. I've lost so many dogs. And here they come, these bandits, and think the bird is theirs to take! But they soon find that this mountain...is a very dangerous place.

Russell: [notices the skeleton] Hey, that looks like Kevin!

Charles F. Muntz: Kevin"?

Russell: Yeah, that's my new giant bird pet. I trained it to follow us.

Charles F. Muntz: Follow you? That's impossible! How?

Russell: [pulls out a chocolate bar] She likes chocolate!

Charles F. Muntz: Chocolate?

Russell: Yeah, I gave her some of my chocolate. She goes ga-ga for it.

Carl Fredricksen: [takes Russell's chocolate bar] But it ran off! It's gone, now.

Charles F. Muntz: [glaring; illuminates a shelf of flight caps; knocks one flight cap over; knocks another cap over, then picks up a third; drops the cap, glaring at Carl; grins sinisterly] You know, Carl... These people who pass through here, they all tell pretty good stories. A surveyor, making a map. A botanist, cataloguing plants. An old man, taking his house to Paradise Falls. I mean, that's the best one yet. I can't wait to hear how it ends.

Carl Fredricksen: Well, it's been a wonderful evening, but we'd better be going.

Charles F. Muntz: Oh, you're not leaving.

Carl Fredricksen: We don't want to take advantage of your hospitality. Come on, Russell.

Russell: But we haven't even had dessert yet!

Charles F. Muntz: No, the boy's right! You haven't had dessert! Epsilon here makes a delicious cherries jubilee! Oh, you really must stay! I insist! We have so much more to talk about!

Beta: Not you!

Gamma: What do we do with Dug?

Alpha: He has lost the bird. Put him in the Cone of Shame.

Dug: I do not like the Cone of Shame.

Carl Fredricksen: Well, thanks for keeping us dry anyway, Ellie.

Russell: Which one's the front?

Carl Fredricksen: Oh, boy.

Russell: [the pole catapults the tent cover in the air, then it plummets down the cliff] Is this step three or is this step five? There. All done. That's for you. Oh, tents are hard.

Carl Fredricksen: Wait, aren't you super wilderness guy...with the GPMs and the badges?

Russell: Yeah, but...Can I tell you a secret?

Carl Fredricksen: No!

Russell: [quickly] Alright. Here goes. I've never actually built a tent before. There, I said it!

Carl Fredricksen: You've been camping before, haven't you?

Russell: Well...never outside.

Carl Fredricksen: Well, why didn't you ask your dad to help build you a tent?

Russell: Ah, I don't think he wants to talk about this stuff.

Carl Fredricksen: Why don't you try him sometime? Maybe he'll surprise ya.

Russell: Well, he's away a lot. I don't see him much.

Carl Fredricksen: He's gotta be home sometime.

Russell: Well, I call often… but...Phyllis told me I bug him too much.

Carl Fredricksen: Phyllis? You call your own mother by her first name?

Russell: Phyllis isn't my mom.

Carl Fredricksen: Oh...

Russell: But, he promised me he would come to the Wilderness Explorer Ceremony and pin on my Assisting the Elderly badge. So, he can show me about tents then, right?

Carl Fredricksen: Hey, why don't you get some sleep? Don't want to wake up the traveling flea circus.

Russell: [yawns] Mr. Fredricksen, Dug says he wants to take Kevin prisoner. We have to protect him. Can Kevin go with us?

Carl Fredricksen: All right, he can come.

Russell: Promise you won't leave him?

Carl Fredricksen: Yeah.

Russell: Cross your heart?

Carl Fredricksen: [to himself] Cross my heart. What have I got myself into, Ellie?

Dug: Oh please, oh please, oh please, be my prisoner!

Russell: Dug, stop bothering Kevin!

Dug: That man there says why i could take the bird, and i love that man there like he is my master.

Carl Fredricksen: I am not your master!

Dug: I am warning you once again, bird!

Russell: Hey, quit it!

Dug: I am jumping on you now, bird!

Carl Fredricksen: Russell, at this rate, we'll never get to the falls.

Dug: Here, bird!

Carl Fredricksen: [pulls Russell off, but his house bumps into the cavern, causing the window to shatter; then glares at Russell, Kevin and Dug as they all stand at attention; to Dug; then to Kevin; Kevin screeches at him; to Russell; to both Dug and Kevin] I'm nobody's master, got it?! I don't want you here, and I don't want you here! I'm stuck with you. And if you two don't clear out of here by the time I count to three...

Dug: [notices a tennis ball on Carl's cane; whimpers] A ball! Oh, boy, oh, boy! A ball!!

Carl: [plucks one tennis ball out of his cane] A ball? Here, here. You want it, boy? Huh, huh? Yeah, yeah? Huh?

Dug: Yes I do! I do ever so want the ball!

Carl: [throws it] Go get it!

Dug: [runs off to get the tennis ball] Oh, boy! Oh, boy! I will get it, and then bring it back!

Carl: Quick, Russell, give me some chocolate.

Russell: Why?

Carl: [snatches a piece of chocolate; Kevin squawks, he throws it to let Kevin fetch it and pulls Russell along.] Just give it to me! Bird. Bird. Come on, Russell.

Gamma: Hang on, I picked up the bird's scent!

Beta: [sniffs the ground] Wait a minute, what's this? Chocolate, I smell chocolate!

Gamma: I'm getting prunes and denture cream! Who are they?

Beta: Oh, man, Master will not be pleased. We better tell him someone took the bird. Right, Alpha?

Alpha: [in a squeaky voice] No. Soon enough the bird will be ours yet again. Find the scent, my compadres, and you too shall have much rewarding from Master for the toil factor you wage.

Beta: [trying his best not to laugh] Hey, Alpha, I think there's something wrong with your collar. You must've bumped it.

Gamma: [not trying to hide his laughter at all] Yeah! Your voice sounds funny!

Alpha: [they both stop laughing; all of them turn their attention to a nearby tree; slight pauses out, Gamma whimpers] Beta! Gamma! Mayhaps you desire - SQUIRREL! Mayhaps you desire to challenge the ranking that I have been assigned by my strength and cunning.

Beta: No, no, no...but maybe Dug would. You might wanna ask him.

Gamma: Yeah. I wonder if he's found the bird on his very special mission'.

Alpha: [laughs evilly] Do not mention Dug to me at this time. His fool's errand will keep him most occupied. Most occupied, indeed. Do you not agree with that which I am saying to you now?

Beta: [he and Gamma whine] Sure, but the second Master finds out that you sent Dug out by himself, none of us will get a treat.

Alpha: [growls at them; presses a button on Beta's collar with his nose and barks] You are wise, my trusted lieutenant. This is Alpha calling Dug. Come in, Dug.

Dug: [whispering] Hi, Alpha. Hey, your voice sounds funny.

Alpha: [growls] I know, I know! Have you seen the bird?

Dug: Why yes. The bird is my prisoner, now.

Gamma: Yeah, right!

Alpha: Impossible! Where are you?

Dug: I am here with the bird, and I will bring it back, and then you will like me. Oh, gotta go!

Russell: Hey, Dug. Who are you talking to?

Alpha: No, wait! Wait!

Beta: What's Dug doing out there?

Gamma: Why is he with that small mailman?

Beta: Where are they?!

Alpha: [pushes a button that shows where Dug is on the map] There he is. Come on!

Russell: Hey, I like dogs.

Carl Fredricksen: We have your dog! Wonder who he belongs to.

Russell: Sit, boy. Hey, look, he's trained! Shake. Uh-huh. Speak.

Dug: Hi, there!

Carl Fredricksen: [spooked] Did that dog just say "Hi, there"?

Dug: [Carl screams; jumps up on Carl] Oh, yes! My name is Dug. I have just met you and I love you!

Carl Fredricksen: Wha...

Dug: [turns his attention to a rock; slight pauses out] My master made me this collar. He is a good and smart master and he made me this collar so that I may talk. SQUIRREL! My master is good and smart.

Carl Fredricksen: It's not possible.

Dug: Oh it is, because my master is smart.

Russell: [inspects the collar and twists a dial] Cool! What do these do, boy?

Dug: [click; click; click; click] Hey would you- -cuerdo con tigo- I use that collar- -watashi wa hanashi ma- -to talk with, I would be happy if you stopped.

Carl Fredricksen: Russell, don't touch that. It could be radioactive or something.

Dug: [sniffs the ground around Carl and Russell; Kevin tackles Dug and screeches] I am a great tracker. My pack sent me on a special mission all by myself. Have you seen a bird? I want to find one and I have been on the scent. I am a great tracker, did I mention that? Hey, that is the bird! I have never seen one up close but this is the bird. May I take your bird back to camp as my prisoner?

Carl Fredricksen: Yes! Take it! And on the way, learn how to bark like a real dog!

Dug: [barks; howls] Oh! I can bark! And here's howling!

Russell: Can we keep him? Please, please, please?

Carl Fredricksen: No.

Russell: [falls to his knees, pleading] But it's a talking dog!

Carl Fredricksen: [grabs Russell] It's just a weird trick or something. Let's get to the falls.

Dug: [as he and Kevin follows] Please be my prisoner. Oh please, oh please be my prisoner.

Carl Fredricksen: [Kevin eats the balloon and swallows it and the ballon pops, And he spits it out.; Kevin comes down and hides behind Russell.] Get down, You're not allowed up there! You come down there right now! Sheesh, can you believe this, Ellie?

Russell: Ellie? Hey, Ellie, could I keep the bird? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. She said for you to let me.

Carl Fredricksen: [to Russell] But I told him no! I told you no! N-O.

Carl Fredricksen: Darn thing! Come on, Russell, would you hurry up?

Russell: I'm tired and my knee hurts.

Carl Fredricksen: Which knee?

Russell: My elbow hurts, and I have to go to the bathroom.

Carl Fredricksen: I asked you about that five minutes ago!

Russell: [falls to the ground; the house drags him] I didn't need to goooo theeeeennn! I don't want to walk anymore. Can we stop?

Carl Fredricksen: Russell, if you don't hurry up, the tigers will eat you.

Russell: There are no tigers in South America. Zoology.

Carl Fredricksen: Oh, for the love of Pete. Go on into the bushes and do your business.

Russell: Okay, here. Hold my stuff. I always wanted to try this. Mr. Fredricksen, am I supposed to dig the hole before or after?

Carl Fredricksen: [grunts] None of my concern!

Russell: Oh, it's before!

Carl Fredricksen: [grunts again] La la la la la!

Carl Fredricksen: Now, we're gonna walk to the Falls quickly and quietly with no rap music or flashdancing.

Russell: Uh-huh.

Carl Fredricksen: We have three days, at best, before the helium leaks out of those balloons. And if we're not at the Falls when that happens, then we're not getting to the Falls.

Russell: I found the sand!

Carl Fredricksen: Don't you worry, Ellie. We'll get our house over there.

Russell: This is fun already, isn't it, Mr. Fredricksen? By the time we get there, you're gonna feel so assisted. Oh, Mr. Fredricksen, if we happen to get separated, use the Wilderness Explorer Call. Caw, caw, raar! Wait, why are we going to Paradise Falls again?

Carl Fredricksen: Hey Let's play a game. It's called "See Who Can Be Quiet The Longest.

Russell: Cool! My mom loves that game! All right then.

Russell: Hi, Mr. Fredricksen! It's me, Russell!

Carl Fredricksen: What're you doing out here kid?

Russell: [the flag flies out of his backpack; long pauses; '''Pause''': Not my flag is losing! NO!] I found the snipe and I followed it under your porch, but this snipe had a long tail and looked more like a large mouse. Please let me in.

Carl Fredricksen: [beat; goes back inside his house; but after a few seconds, he opens the door; Russell excitedly enters; surprised to see Russell in the living room] No. Oh, all right. You can come... ...in.

Carl Fredricksen: So long, boys! I'll send you a postcard from Paradise Falls!

Carl Fredricksen: [runs to his mailbox] Why... Hey! Hey, you! What... What do you think you're doing?!

Steve: [tries to fix the mailbox] I am so sorry, sir.

Carl Fredricksen: [stops him] Don't touch that!

Steve: No, no, no, l-let me take care of that for you.

Carl Fredricksen: [pulls it away from him] Get away from our mailbox!

Steve: Hey. Sir, I-

Carl Fredricksen: [accidentally clubs Steve with his cane] I don't want you to TOUCH IT!!!

Steve: Ow!

Russell: Good afternoon, my name is Russell. And I am a Wilderness Explorer in Tribe 54, Sweat Lodge 12. Are you in need of any assistance today, sir?

Carl Fredricksen: No.

Russell: I could help you cross the street.

Carl Fredricksen: No.

Russell: I could help you cross your yard?

Carl Fredricksen: No.

Russell: I could help you cross your porch?

Carl Fredricksen: No.

Russell: Well, I gotta help you cross something.

Carl Fredricksen: Uh...no, I'm doing fine.

Carl Fredricksen: [looks at the mailbox; goes to the mailbox, then getting the cards; blows the mailbox with the leaf blower] Quite a sight, huh, Ellie? Uh, mail's here. Shady Oaks Retirement. Oh, brother.

Tom: Hey Morning, Mr. Fredricksen. Need any help, there?

Carl Fredricksen: Uh, no...Er, yes. Tell your boss that you boys are ruining our house.

Tom: [Carl blasts the worker with a leaf blower] Well, just to let you know, my boss'll be happy to take this little place off your hands for double his last offer. Whaddaya say to that? I'll...take that as a "no", then.

Carl Fredricksen: I believe I made my position to your boss quite clear.

Tom: You poured prune juice in his gas tank.

Carl Fredricksen: [chuckles; the worker hands him a megaphone] Yeah, that was good. Here, let me talk to him. You in the suit! Yes, you! TAKE A BATH HIPPIE!!

Tom: [snatches the megaphone back] I am not with him! This is serious! He's out to get your house!

Carl Fredricksen: Tell your boss he can have our house.

Tom: Really?

Carl Fredricksen: [slams door] WHEN I'M DEAD!

Tom: I'll take that as a "maybe".

Newsreel Announcer: Movietown News presents, "Spotlight on Adventure"! What you are now witnessing is footage never before seen by civilized humanity, a lost world in South America. Lurking in the shadow of majestic Paradise Falls, it sports plants and animals undiscovered by science. Who would dare set foot on this inhospitable summit? Why, our subject today, Charles Muntz! The beloved explorer lands his dirigible, the Spirit of Adventure, in New Hampshire this week, completing a yearlong expedition to the lost world. This lighter-than-air craft was designed by Muntz himself and is longer than 22 prohibition paddy wagons placed end-to-end. And here comes the adventurer now! Never apart from his faithful dogs, Muntz conceived the craft for canine comfort. It's a veritable floating palace in the sky, complete with doggy bath and mechanical canine walker. And, Jiminy Cricket do the locals consider Muntz the bee's knees. And how!

Charles Muntz: [puts on his helmet goggles; gives a thumbs-up] Adventure is out there!

Newsreel Announcer: But what has Muntz brought back this time?

Charles Muntz: Gentlemen, I give you the monster of Paradise Falls!

Newsreel Announcer: And golly! What a swell monster this is! But what's this? Scientists cry foul! The national explorer society accuses Muntz of fabricating the skeleton.

Young Carl: No!

Newsreel Announcer: The organization strips Muntz of his membership. Humiliated, Muntz vows to return to Paradise Falls and promises to capture the beast alive!

Charles Muntz: I promise to capture the beast alive, and I will not come back until I do!

Newsreel Announcer: And so, the explorer's off to clear his name. Bon Voyage, Charles Muntz, and good luck capturing the monster of Paradise Falls!