32 quotes
Coming Out and Acceptance Among Friends
Dan Mott
I'm out.
Jerry Conlaine
What does that mean?
Tom Marshall
I think it means he's out. Like coming out, like he's finally admitting he's gay.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Disastrous Adventure Comes to an End
Dan Mott
This trip is officially over! This is finished! Let's just go home.
Tom Marshall
I agree. That is a great idea. All we've got to do is jump up over that 100-foot waterfall, swim upstream 20 miles, get the sheriff on the phone. He liked us, I remember. And he'll send out a rescue boat. And--hey, there's a beer in the river. Cool.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Wildlife Encounter in the Open
Dan Mott
Hey guys look! A wild deer! All out in the open like that!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Bacon and Squirrel Conversation
Dan Mott
Mmm, bacon.
Del Knox
Squirrel.
Dan Mott
Mmm, squirrel.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Inappropriate Celebration and Safety Concerns
Jerry Conlaine
I christen this, Duke the second!
[smashes beer bottle on canoe]
River Guide
Thanks for breaking glass where my kids play.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Realization in a Surprising Moment
Dan Mott
Whoa... Matrix.
[While high on marijuana, after dodging a bullet]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Acknowledging Serious Trouble Ahead
Dan Mott
We are in serious trouble my friends. All data points to us being--how do you humans say it?-- completely screwed?
[imitating [[w:C-3PO|C-3PO]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Comment on a song's coolness
Jerry Conlaine
Wow, this song is so uncool.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Secrets Kept in the Cave
Tom Marshall
This never leaves the cave.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Surprising Exclamation in the Wilderness
Tom Marshall
Great mother of ganja!
[discovering a barn full of [[w:marijuana|marijuana]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Survival Choices in Extreme Situations
Dan Mott
The only chance we have to survive is to huddle together for warmth...
Jerry Conlaine
I, for one, choose death.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Long Wait in the Cabin
Del Knox
I'd get dressed faster if I were you cause I've been alone in this cabin for 30 years.
[after giving the nearly naked guys clothes]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Living in the Moment Without Worries
Jerry Conlaine
No worries, no responsibilities, just living in the moment.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Cold Night and a Playful Demand
Jerry Conlaine
Come back to bed, you guys. I'm freezing.
Tom Marshall
Not until he puts Jabba back in his Hut!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Advantage of Running Barefoot
Dan Mott
What are you doing?
Jerry Conlaine
Taking off my shoes.
Dan Mott
Why?
Jerry Conlaine
Because I run faster with no shoes
Dan Mott
You can't outrun that bear!
Jerry Conlaine
I don't have to outrun the bear, I just have to outrun you!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Cherokee Wisdom Meets Modern Technology
Tom Marshall
We'll shine them. It's an old Cherokee trick.
Jerry Conlaine
Oh, I forgot. The Cherokee have been using flashlights for thousands of years.
Dan Mott
Didn't they pioneer the D-cell battery?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Reunion at Billy's Funeral
Tom Marshall
Is this Billy's funeral? Is that the corpse of Billy Newwood?
Tom Marshall
That you, Jerry?
Jerry Conlaine
Tom!
Tom Marshall
Dan with you? Where'd you guys park?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Del Knox's Challenge to His Opponents
Del Knox
When you peckawoods get your diapers cleaned come back! I'll be waiting!
[after scaring off Dennis and Elwood]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Eyes Trying to Escape
Tom Marshall
It was like her eyes were trying to escape her head.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Comparing Chances in Relationships After Loss
Dan Mott
Billy's dead and he still has a better chance of getting laid than I do.
[Billy's Italian girlfriend rubs herself on his casket]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Truths and Lies Among Friends
Jerry Conlaine
Wait a second. Tom, were you really employee of the month?
Tom Marshall
No! I lied about that too!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Canoeing Misadventures and Dark Humor
River Guide
There's a transmitter in the canoe. So just in case you three go missing, at least we'll get our boat back.
[While talking to Jerry, Dan and Tom about renting the canoe]
Elwood
How you like me now? Huh? How you like me now, fishy? Oh, yeah, that's right you can't talk, cause you don't have a head and I cut it off!
[After cutting off a fish's head with a hatchet]
Dennis
]" being sung] The hills have gone gay.
[hearing "[[w:Do you Really Want to Hurt Me|Do You Really Want To Hurt Me]
Dennis and Elwood
Yes we really want to hurt you. Yes we really want to make you cry. Yes we really want to shoot you. Yes we really want to make you die.
[singing]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Decision to Embark on Billy's Trip
Jerry Conlaine
Let's take Billy's trip.
Tom Marshall
I say hell yes!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Confronting Inappropriate Behavior
Del Knox
Freeze you perverts!
[After finding Dan, Jerry and Tom in their boxers]
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Scouting Memories and Sweet Treats
Jerry Conlaine
Well I was a boy scout, you were a boy scout too right Tom?
Tom Marshall
No but I ate a brownie once.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Treasure Hunts and Shared Adventures
Jerry Conlaine
Here's the thing: the guys and I are going on a treasure hunt and I know it sounds dumb, but its something that we have to do. For Billy.
[to Denise]
Denise
That doesn't sound dumb at all, I completely understand.
Jerry Conlaine
You do?
[surprised]
Denise
Just call me when you get a chance. But I... I might be out of the house, for a bit. Yeah cause my girlfriends and I, we're gonna go on a search for the Lost City of Atlantis!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Treasure Map Discovery in Without a Paddle
Jerry Conlaine
You guys, check out this map. It looks like Billy left us a treasure map.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Identity and Nationality in Perspective
Tom Marshall
I'm not an astronaut, I'm an American.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Childhood Memories and Fear of Heights
Jerry Conlaine
Come on, Dan. It's like when we'd jump off the railroad bridge into the river when we were kids. This is higher than that.
Dan Mott
But I never did jump in the river! You guys always pushed me when I wasn't looking!
Jerry Conlaine
Oh yeah!
[Pushes Dan]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Facing Challenges with Humor and Resolve
Dan Mott
Give em hell, Tommy
[after Tom had offered to distract Dennis and Elwood instead of Jerry]
Tom Marshall
This hell-mart's open for business, and I'm slashing prices.
[about to rappel down the tree]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Acceptance of a Difficult Situation
Dan Mott
You know, things are as bad as they could possibly get.
Dan Mott
I stand corrected!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Lighthearted Take on Fetal Position Advice
Tom Marshall
He won't bother you if you're in the fetal position.
Tom Marshal
Abort the fetal position!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.