Ben Affleck Quotes

Holden McNeil It's not who you love, it's how.

Doug MacRay I need your help. I can't tell you what it is, you can never ask me about it later, and we're gonna hurt some people.

James Coughlin ...Whose car are we gonna take? (and they rush to the prospects to beat up a tough guy who damaged Claire's car...)

Jack Cunningham She has other things maybe she ought to be worrying about instead of worrying about how much I drink. I mean, she needs to worry about staying out of her fucking refrigerator.

Beth Nice.

Jack Cunningham She's losing a huge war against the refrigerator.

Beth What are you talking about? Jack...

Jack Cunningham She needs to find the fucking treadmill.

Beth Stop it. That is so mean. She's my friend.

Jack Cunningham Well, she should mind her business.

Beth Okay.

Jack Cunningham That's why I don't come here, cause it always turns to... Which one of the 20 bedrooms am I supposed to be staying in?

Beth Take the second one on the left.

Nick Dunne What are you thinking? How are you feeling? What have we done to each other? What will we do?

Holden McNeil If this is a crush, I don't think I could take it if the real thing ever happened.

Jack Dupree Rip hand to god you've got nothing to worry about. Yeah, I've assembled a team. We're gonna go in and get this guy Israel and everyone is gonna leave the theater grinning.

Lester Siegel Okay, you got six people hiding out in a town of what, four million people, all of whom chant "death to America" all the livelong day. You want to set up a movie in a week. You want to lie to Hollywood, a town where everybody lies for a living. Then you're gonna sneak 007 over here into a country that wants CIA blood on their breakfast cereal, and you're gonna walk the Brady Bunch out of the most watched city in the world.

Tony Mendez Past about a hundred militia at the airport. That's right.

Siegel Right. Look, I gotta tell you. We did suicide missions in the army that had better odds than this.

Margo Dunne So, what'd you get her?

Nick Dunne There's no good gift for wood.

Margo Dunne I know. Go home, fuck her brains out, slap her with your penis. "There's some wood for you, bitch.

Bartender Those clothes and my clothes would look good on my floor.

Shannon What? You wanna say something?

Brodie Yeah. About a million things, but I can't express myself mono-syllabically enough for you to understand them all.

Jack Ryan General, the president is basing his decisions on some really bad information right now. And if you shut me out, your family, and my family, and 25 million other families will be dead in 30 minutes!!!

Loki Our last four days on Earth. If I had a dick, I'd go get laid. But we can do the next best thing.

Bartleby What's that?

Loki Let's kill people.

Loki Oh, not you.

Doug MacRay You following us, Jem? Who were you tailing, me or her?

James Coughlin I told you. I made the Avalanche.

Doug MacRay You got nothing to worry about. It's all under control.

James Coughlin So, you're trying to get us jammed up, that it?

Doug MacRay Yeah, I'm trying to get you jammed up.

James Coughlin Tell me you got a move here, Dougie. Cause the only way I see it, is that you got sprung like a goddamn bear trap on some toonie pussy who happens to be the one goddamn person-fuck! the one person that can give us to the fucking feds.

Doug MacRay Calm down. Don't you think we need to be smart right now?

James Coughlin Smart? Let's start fucking all the witnesses. Oh yeah I'm blowing the Assistant manager, am I smart now? And no, I didn't tell the other guys because they'd flip the fuck out! And I want them ready for the next thing.

Doug MacRay I told you, the next fucking thing ain't ready yet.

James Coughlin Then fucking make it ready!

Doug MacRay I don't like the guards on the next thing, alright. One kid is like fucking ], He wears the vest on the outside and tucks his pants into his fucking combat boots.

James Coughlin The truck's fucking waist high.

Doug MacRay We'll find another truck with the driver who's a fucking fat kid with his fucking shirt on top who don't think he's special forces.

James Coughlin Well I know you're happy in fuck-city over there but I waited nine years in Walpole for you motherfucker, just nine years that's all. I'm done waiting

Doug MacRay This is the last one. We're hitting pause after this. We get pinched, remember whose idea this was, okay? Be ready on Friday.

Jim Young There's an important phrase that we use here, and think it's time that you all learned it. Act as if. You understand what that means? Act as if you are the fucking President of this firm. Act as if you got a 9" cock. Okay? Act as if.

Holden McNeil I love you…I love you. And not, not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. I love you. Very, very simple, very truly. You are the-the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is-is-is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider. But—I had to say it. I just, I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't—I can't look into your eyes without feeling that—that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are.And I know, this will probably queer our friendship—no pun intended—but I had to say it, cause I've never felt this way before, and I-I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But, God, I just—I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I know, I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there's a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something, too. And all I ask, please, is that you just—you just not dismiss that, and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. Alyssa, there isn't another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it is there between you and me. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I am forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which—while I do appreciate it—I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of.

Nick Dunne I always wondered why you kept in touch, after everything. You were together for two years in boarding school, right?

Desi Collings She was my first serious girlfriend.

Nick Dunne Why did you break up?

Desi Collings That's a strange question.

Nick Dunne Did you treat her bad? Did you cheat on her?

Desi Collings That's a rude question.

Nick Dunne Let me tell you what Amy told me. She dumped you, you completely unravelled. You stalked her, you threatened her, you attempted suicide in her bed and were institutionalised.

Desi Collings Your wife is missing, and you came all this way to tell me this?

Nick Dunne Well I thought there might be another side to this story.

Jim Young Okay, here's the deal. I'm not here to waste your time. Okay? And I certainly hope you're not here to waste mine. So I'm gonna keep this short. If you become an employee of this firm, you will make your first million within three years. Okay? I'm gonna repeat that. You will make a million dollars within three years of your first day of employment at J.T. Marlin. There is no question as to whether or not you'll become a millionaire working here. The only question is how many times over. You think I'm joking? I am not joking. I am a millionaire. It's a weird thing to hear, right? I'll tell ya. It's a weird thing to say. I am a fucking millionaire. And guess how old I am. Twenty-seven. You know what that makes me here? A fuckin senior citizen. This firm is entirely comprised of people your age, not mine. Lucky for me, I happen to be very fucking good at my job, or I'd be out of one. You guys are the new blood. You're gonna go home with the kessef. You are the future big swinging dicks of this firm. Now, you all look money hungry, and that's good. Anybody tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fuckin have any. They say money can't buy happiness? Look at the fuckin smile on my face. Ear to ear, baby. You want details? Fine. I drive a Ferrari 355 Cabriolet. What's up? I have a ridiculous house in the South Fork. I have every toy you could possibly imagine. And best of all, kids, I am liquid. So, now that you know what's possible. Let me tell you what's required. You are required to work your fucking ass off at this firm. We want winners here, not pikers. A piker walks at the bell. A piker asks how much vacation time you get in the first year. Vacation time? People come and work at this firm for one reason: to become filthy rich. That's it. We're not here to make friends. We're not savin the fuckin manatees here, guys. You want vacation time? Go teach third grade, public school. The first three months at the firm are as a trainee. You make $150 a week. After you're done training, you take the Series Seven. You pass that, you become a junior broker and you're opening accounts for your team leader. You open 40 accounts, you start workin for yourself. Sky's the limit. Word or two about being a trainee. Friends, parents, other brokers, whoever, they're gonna give you shit about it. It's true. $150 a week? Not a lot of money. Pay them no mind. You need to learn this business, and this is the time to do it. Once you pass the test, none of that's gonna matter. Your friends are shit. You tell them you made 25 grand last month, they're not gonna fuckin believe you. Fuck them! Fuck em! Parents don't like the life you lead? Fuck you, Mom and Dad. See how it feels when you're makin their fuckin Lexus payments. Now, go home and think about it. Think about whether or not this is really for you. If you decide it isn't, listen, it's nothing to be embarrassed about. It's not for everyone. Thanks. But if you really want this, you call me on Monday and we'll talk. Just don't waste my fuckin time. Okay, that's it.

Jack Ryan The bomb is in play! Dylan's called the AFRAT team! They're meeting me at the docks in twenty minutes! We're going to see if we can find it!

Jack Ryan Sir, I know you. I know you had nothing to do with the Baltimore bomb, and you sure as hell know you didn't! But you're still about to launch a nuclear strike against us! This no longer has anything to do with Baltimore! Now it's about fear! Our fear of your missiles, your fear of our subs, fear of being weak, fear of making a mistake... the same fear of the other guy that had us build these goddamn bombs in the first place!

Whitland Morning. Has anyone seen the overnights?

Board No

Whitland We creamed em. Last night was a re-run which says to me... Do I smell onion? Excuse me. May I ask what you're doing in my boardroom?

Loki You may proceed, mon ami.

Bartleby I'm gonna have to start by apologizing. My friend has a bit of a penchant for the dramatic.

Loki Oh come on!

Bartleby Relax, I'm doing this. Mooby, the Golden Calf. Created by Nancy Goldruff, a former kindergarten teacher in 1989. Bought by the Complex Corporation in 1991. Broadcast nationally as the "Mooby Fun-Time Hour." Since its inception, has spawned two theatrical films, sixteen records, eight prime-time specials, and a library of priced-to-own videocassettes. Not to mention bicoastal theme parks... dubbed "Mooby World." Did I miss anything?

Whitland You forgot Mooby Magazine.

Bartleby Damn it!

Whitland Now, is there a point to this?

Bartleby You and your board are idolaters.

Loki I can't believe you forgot the magazine. That's you. Do you know much about voodoo? That's a fascinating practice. No real doctrine of faith to speak of. More an arrangement of superstitions the most well-known of which is the voodoo doll. You see- -a mockup of an individual is subjected to various pokes and prods.The desired result is that the individual will feel those effects.

Whitland Call security, now!

Loki All lines are currently down.

Bartleby I'm gonna have to apologize.

Loki -Would you knock it off?

Bartleby You're doing it again. Stop. What did we talk about? Ahem. You are responsible for raising an icon which draws worship from the Lord. You have broken the First Commandment. More than that, I'm afraid not a one of you passes for a decent human being. Your continued existence is a mockery of morality. Like you, Mr. Burton. Last year, you cheated on your wife of 17 years 8 times. You even had sex with her best friend... while you were supposed to be home watching the kids.

Loki In the bed that you and your wife share, no less.

Bartleby Mr. Newman. You got your girlfriend drunk at last year's Christmas party and then paid a kid from the mail room to have sex with her while she was passed out just so you could break up with her guilt-free when she sobbingly confessed in the morning. She killed herself three months later. Mr. Brace disowned his gay son. Very compassionate. Mr. Ray put his mother in a third-rate nursing home and used the profits from the sale of her home to buy an Oriental rug for himself. Heavens. Mr. Barker flew to Thailand on the company account to have sex with an eleven-year-old boy. Mr. Holtzman okayed the production of Mooby Dolls from materials he knew to be toxic and unsafe because it was, survey says... less costly. You, on the other hand are an innocent. You lead a good life. Good for you. But you, Mr. Whitland. You have more skeletons in your closet than this assembled party. I cannot even mention them aloud.

Loki You're his father, you sick fuck! - Good.-

Bartleby Not bad, man.

Loki That's great work.

Bartleby Very good.

Loki Well, alone at last. With the exception of Miss Pryce here there isn't a decent human being amongst you. Not one. Do you know what makes a human being decent? Fear. And therein lies the problem. None of you has anything left to fear anymore. You rest comfortably in seats of inscrutable power hiding behind your false idol,far from judgment lives shrouded in secrecy, even from one another. But not from God. (Walks off) Oh, forgot my little voodoo doll. Man, it really looks just like you, doesn't it? Look, if I believed enough in this... I wonder. Come on. I don't believe in voodoo. Voodoo. But I do believe in this!. DON'T RUN! DON'T RUN! FAKES! FAKES, ALL OF YOU FAKES! AND YOU! IN THE BED THAT YOU AND YOUR WIFE SHARE NO LESS!

Bartleby But I do believe in this"... What does that mean?

Loki Gum? Go on it's OK you've done nothing wrong, those guys were finks and you're a pure soul. But you didn't say God bless you when I sneezed.

Bartleby LOKI!

Loki You're getting off light.

Bartleby Loki!

Loki I know, I'm coming. You're so lucky.

Stansfield Turner You're telling me there's a movie office in Hollywood right now that's funded by the CIA.

Tony Mendez Yes, sir.

Cyrus Vance What's wrong with the bikes again?

Jack O'Donnell We tried to get the message upstairs.

Turner You think... You think this is more plausible than teachers?

O'Donnell Yes we do. One, there are no more foreign teachers in Iran.

Mendez And, we think everybody knows Hollywood people. And everybody knows they would shoot in Stalingrad with ] directing if it'd sell tickets. There are only bad options. It's about finding the best one.

Turner You don't have a better bad idea than this?

O'Donnell This is the best bad idea we have, sir. By far.

Turner The United States government just sanctioned your science fiction movie.

Michael Jennings If you show someone their future, they have no future. If you take away the mystery, you take away the hope.

Rachel Michael! What are you doing?

Jennings Go. I'll distract them.

Jennings Go, please.

Rachel No!

Rachel You come with me now! You promised. you'd change your fate!

Jennings Please, we don't have time. If you love me, if you care about me, go. Have a good life. Remember me.

Gun Salesman We call this piece the Fecalator. One look at it and the target shits him or herself. Try it on.

Loki Well, it's a lot more compact than the flaming sword, but it's not nearly as impressive. Just doesn't have that wrath-of-the-almighty edge to it. I mean, come on, how am I supposed to strike fear into the hearts of the wicked with this thing? Look at this...

Bartleby Well, then, you know, don't use a gun. Just lay the place to waste, like.

Loki Easy for you to say. You get off light in razing. You got to stand there and read at ], I had to do all the work.

Bartleby What work did you do? You lit a few fires.

Loki I rained down sulfur, man, there's a subtle difference.

Bartleby Oh, yeah, I'm sure.

Loki Hey, you know, fuck you, man; any moron with a pack of matches can set a fire. Raining down sulfur is like an endurance trial, man. Mass ] is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, outside of soccer.

Shannon Smart-ass ex-boyfriend! I've got two things to tell you. One: I don't like you. I see you every week in this mall. I don't like you shiftless layabouts. You're one of those loser fucking mallrat kids. You don't come down here to do work or shop. You hang out all day. You act like you fucking live here. Well, I have no respect for people with no shopping agenda.

Brodie Is this what's known as motivated salesmanship?

Shannon Rene told me to leave you alone, but she's fucking clueless. You see, Bruce, I like to pick up girls on the rebound from a disappointing relationship. They're more vulnerable and in much more need of solace and they're fairly open to suggestion. And, I use that to fuck them some place very uncomfortable.

Brodie What, like the back of a Volkswagen?

Shannon No. Like someplace girls dread.

Bruce Wayne / Batman Tell me. Do you bleed? You will.

Nick Dunne I didn't touch you!

Amy Dunne You didn't need to.

Nick Dunne Bullshit! That notice of disposal, I have that. You threw it out.

Amy Dunne The notice? Yes.

Nick Dunne I want a blood test! I want a paternity test!

Amy Dunne I love tests.

Claire Keesey A few days ago my bank was robbed. Four men took over and opened the safe. They took me as a hostage. Uh... they blindfolded me and drove me around. And then they stopped and let me out over at the beach and... and one of the guys told me to walk until I felt the water on my toes. It's the longest walk of my life, I kept thinking I'd step off a cliff. And... and then I felt the water.

Doug MacRay I'm sorry.

Claire Keesey It's not your fault.

Nick Dunne You fucking cunt!

Amy Dunne I'm the cunt you married. The only time you liked yourself was when you were trying to be someone this cunt might like. I'm not a quitter, I'm that cunt. I've killed for you; who else can say that? You think you'd be happy with a nice Midwestern girl? No way, baby! I'm it.

Nick Dunne Fuck. You're delusional. I mean, you're insane, why would you even want this? Yes, I loved you and then all we did was resent each other, and try to control each other, and cause each other pain.

Amy Dunne That's marriage. Now, I'm getting ready.

Margo Dunne I can't watch you play house with that thing for the next 18 years!

Nick Dunne I can't just walk away.

Margo Dunne You could get custody.

Nick Dunne No, I won't, and you know it. It's gonna be my child, and I'm not gonna leave it.

Margo Dunne You wanna stay.

Nick Dunne I have a responsibility. It's not about what I want anymore.

Margo Dunne You wanna stay with her. You're breaking my heart.

Nick Dunne Go, you're my voice of reason. I need you with me on this.

Margo Dunne Of course I'm with you. I was with you before we were even born.

Nick Dunne ...and, we've been through the darkness. We come out, united. Uh, we communicate. We're honest with each other. We're partners in crime.

Amy Dunne And?

Nick Dunne And... we're gonna be parents.

Ellen Abbott Oh, my goodness! Oh, how exciting!

Nick Dunne What are you thinking? How are you feeling? What have we done to each other? What will we do?

Tony Mendez You. Where was your passport issued?

Bob Anders Vancouver.

Mendez Where were you born?

Anders Toronto.

Mendez Toron-o", Canadians don’t pronounce the T.

Lee Schatz Some Komiteh guard is actually going to know that?

Mendez If you are detained for questioning they will bring in someone who knows that, yes ... Mary, who are the last three prime ministers of Canada?

Cora Lijek Uh, ], ] and ].

Mendez What's your father's name?

Lijek Howard.

Mendez What's his occupation?

Lijek Fisherman.

Mendez Where were you born?

Lijek Halifax, Nova Scotia.

Mendez What's your date of birth?

Lijek February 21, 1952.

Mendez Good. What's your job on the movie?

Joe Stafford Producer.

Mendez Associate producer. What's the last movie you produced?

Stafford High and Dry.

Mendez Who paid for that?

Stafford ].

Mendez What's your middle name? What's your middle name? What's your middle name?

Stafford Leon.

Mendez Shoot him. He's an American spy ... Look, they're going to try to break you, OK, by trying to get you agitated. You have to know your resume back to front.

Stafford You really believe your little story's gonna make a difference when there's a gun to our heads?

Mendez I think my story's the only thing between you and a gun to your head.

Nick Dunne You. Fucking. Bitch.

Jim Young Goddammit, you fuckin guys. I'm gonna keep this short, okay? You passed your sevens over a month ago. Seth's the only one that's opened the necessary forty accounts for his team leader. When I was a junior broker I did it in 26 days. Okay? You're not sendin out press packets anymore. None of this Debbie the Time Life operator bullshit. So get on the phones, it's time to get to work. Get off your ass! Move around. Motion creates emotion. I remember one time I had this guy call me up, wanted to pitch me, right? Wanted to sell me stock. So I let him. I got every fuckin rebuttal outta this guy, kept him on the phone for an hour and a half. Towards the end I started askin him buying questions, like what's the firm minimum? That's a buying question, right there. That guy's gotta take me down. It's not like I asked him, what's your 800 number? That's a fuckoff question. I was givin him a run and he blew it. Okay? To a question like what is the firm minimum, the answer is zero. You don't like the idea, don't pick up a single share. But this putz is tellin me you know, uhh, 100 shares? Wrong answer! No! You have to be closing all the time. And be aggressive, learn how to push! Talk to em. Ask em questions... ask em rhetorical questions, it doesn't matter, anything, just get a yes out of em. If you're drowning and I throw you a life jacket would you grab it? Yes! Good. Pick up 200 shares I won't let you down. Ask them how they'd like to see thirty, forty percent returns. What are they gonna say, no? Fuck you? I don't wanna see those returns. Stop laughing, it's not funny. If you can't learn how to close, you better start thinkin about another career. And I am deadly serious about that. Dead fuckin serious. And have your rebuttals ready, guy says call me tomorrow? Bullshit! Somebody tells you th-they got money problems about buyin 200 shares is lying to you. You know what I say to that? I say, hey look, man, tell me you don't like my firm, tell me you don't like my idea, tell me you don't like my fuckin neck tie, but don't tell me you can't put together 2,500 bucks. And there is no such thing as a no-sell call. A sell is made on every call you make. Either you sell the client some stock, or he sells you on a reason he can't. Either way, a sell is made. The only question is: who's gonna close? You or him?! Now be relentless. That's it, I'm done.

Jack Dupree For some fucking reason the wise guys love him. They think he's a mystic you know, something special.

Jack Dupree How about the Tremor brothers? Three of them. Same skank mom, different deadbeat dads. They're used for that suicide style, kamikhaze shit. You heard about that dinner club in Cleveland, right? Well the Tremor brothers go rip shit riot on the whole fucking place. Seven dead, twenty-eight wounded. All to get this one fucking guy. Of course in the melee one of them gets shot in the neck passes out, the other gets blowback from a jammed piece is temporarily blinded, the last takes a bullet in the back, can't walk. These are speed freak, neo nazi assholes who read and recite Mein Kampf like it was mother goose, they're meaner than shit, they're dumber than hell. And these motherfuckers will go megaton at the drop of a hat.

Jack Cunningham Come late to the game, you don't play. We'll talk about it at practice tomorrow.

Marcus What are you talking about? I'm four minutes late.

Jack Cunningham You know what? Forget about tomorrow. Go home, you're off the team.

Marcus Coach Dan, what the hell is his problem? I'm barely fucking late.

Coach Dan You heard Coach, Marcus. Go home.

Marcus Are you serious right now?! I'm barely fucking late! Y'all are so stupid, man! This dumbass team!

Ricki It’s turkey time.

Larry Gigli Huh?

Ricki Gobble, gobble.

Bartender And I'm not gay, okay? I get that all the time. No, I'm not gay.

Bruce Wayne / Batman There was a time above... a time before. There were perfect things... diamond absolutes. How things fall, things on Earth. And what falls... is fallen. In the dream, they took me to the light. A beautiful lie.

Jack Cunningham You want to know why they're leaving you open? It's because they don't think you can hit the ocean from the beach.

Jack O'Donnell The six of them went out a back exit. Brits turned them away, Kiwis turned them away, Canadians took them in. Traffic calls them the Houseguests'; they haven't left the Canadian ambassador's house since it happened.

Tony Mendez Why didn't we get them ten weeks ago?

O'Donnell Too dangerous. You've got ] going door to door like Jehovah's Witnesses. Half of them think Khomeini's been too lenient on the ones in the embassy.

Mendez What about the White House?

O'Donnell Carter's shitting enough bricks to build the pyramids. The Canadians are done; they say they're bearing too much risk. Their foreign secretary corners ] in Brussels and told him she wants the six of them out.

Mendez Who else knows?

O'Donnell Just the families. Meanwhile, some genius in our embassy was keeping a mug book on everybody who worked there.

Mendez Jesus Christ!

O'Donnell We think it got shredded before they got in. But now the bastards are using sweatshop kids to reassemble the shreds, and once they reassemble that book, they'll know six Americans got out and they'll know what they look like. Standing room only for beheadings in the square.

Mendez Who's handling?

O'Donnell State is coordinating in house.

Mendez State? They don't do exfils.

O'Donnell They do now. They want to run it by us, strictly as consultants. Engell says its a lose-lose. These people die, they die badly. Publicly. State wants the blame, we'll give it to them.

Mendez What does he want me here for?

O'Donnell So he can tell State he ran it by his best exfil guy.

Shannon That's it. You're dead, mallrat. I'm gonna fuck you up beyond repair!

Brodie Ladies and gentlemen, this tall drink of water headed my way is a pillar of the shopping community who informed me earlier today of a nefarious plan of his to screw my girlfriend in an extremely uncomfortable place.

Gill What, like the back of a Volkswagen?

Rafe McCawley I should've died over there. When I was in that water, I made a deal with God. I told Him I was sorry, I told Him I knew I'd been a fool for leaving you and trying to go over there and be a hero, and I promised I'd never ask for anything again, if I could just see you one more time... And you know what? It was worth it. You kept me alive Evelyn; you brought me home. So I'm gonna stand by my end of the deal. I'm gonna walk away and I won't ask you for anything... but I just want to know why... Just tell me that will you please? Just tell me why.

Robert Pender What we like for this now are bicycles. We've identified back roads from the Shemiran district — a couple of rat lines through the mountains to the crossing at Tabriz. Cars are off the table because of the roadblocks.

Jon Bates We wait until the weather clears up then deliver the six bikes, provide them with maps to the Turkish border.

Adam Engell We have intelligence they can ride bicycles or we’re prepared to send in somebody to teach them.

Tony Mendez Or you could just send in training wheels and meet them at the border with Gatorade. It's 300 miles to the Turkish crossings. They'd need a support crew behind them with a tire pump.

Engell We've only been asked to sharpshoot this, State's handling the op.

Pender Who is...?

Jack O'Donnell Tony's an exfil spesh. He got a lot of the ]'s people out after the fall.

Mendez Sir, if these people can read or add, pretty soon they're gonna figure out they're six short of a full deck. It's winter. You can't wait around until spring when it's nice enough to take a bike ride. The only way out of that city is the airport. You build new cover identities for them, you send in a Moses, he takes them out on a commercial flight.

Bates We've explored those options.

Engell They're never going to get past airport control. Komiteh own the place.

Bates They could pose as reporters. The government issued seventy-something visas for American journalists.

Mario Malinov Seventy-four. And the Revolutionary Guards keep them on 74 leashes.

Mendez If they're caught with fake journalist creds, it's ] head in a noose in an hour. Sir, exfils are like abortions. You don't want to need one, but when you do, you don't do it yourself.

Nun So, you don't believe in God...because of ]?

Loki No, ], that poem "]," that's an indictment of organized religion. The walrus, with his girth and good nature, obviously represents either ] or, with his tusks, the Hindu elephant god Lord ] – that takes care of your eastern religions. Now the carpenter, which is an obvious reference to ], who was raised a carpenter's son, he represents the western religions. Now in the poem, what do they do? What do they do? They dupe all these oysters into following them and then proceed to shuck and devour the helpless creatures en masse. Now I don't know what that says to you, but to me it says that following these faiths based on mythological figures ensures the destruction of one's inner being. Organized religion destroys who we are by inhibiting our actions, by inhibiting our decisions, out of fear of some intangible parent figure, who shakes a finger at us from thousands of years ago and says "Do it, do it and I'll fucking spank you!" The existentialists can keep their ] and their ] — give me ] any day. That guy knows what time it is!

Nun The way you put it... I've never thought about it like that before. What...what have I been doing with my life?

Loki Yeah, I know. Look, why don't you take this money you're collecting for your parish, and go out and buy yourself a new dress. Fix yourself up. Find some man. Find some woman. Find anyone you can connect with, even for a moment. Because that's all that life really is, Sister — it's a series of moments. Why don't you go seize yours? Attagirl.

Bartleby Here's what I don't get about you. You know for a fact that there's a God. You've been in His presence, He's spoken to you personally. And yet I just heard you claim to be an atheist.

Loki I just love to fuck with the clergy, man, I just love it. I love keeping those guys on their toes!

Jim Young I'm sorry, man, this is my seat.

Interviewee #1 Oh, shit, I-I'm so sorry!

Jim Young It's okay, don't worry about it.

Interviewee #2 Fuckin dumbass.

Jim Young Get the fuck outta here.

Interviewee #2 W-what?

Jim Young Don't talk to me, don't look at me, just pick your ass out of that Italian leather chair, and get the fuck outta this room, right now! Come on, let's go, schlep rock! Out! Sit down. We expect everyone here to treat their co-workers with a certain level of respect. Okay, before we get started, I have one question. Does anyone here pass their Series Seven exam?

Interviewee #3 I have a Series Seven license.

Jim Young Good for you, you can get out too.

Interviewee #3 What, why?

Jim Young We don't hire brokers here, we train new ones.

Nick Dunne When I think of my wife, I always think of the back of her head. I picture cracking her lovely skull, unspooling her brain, trying to get answers. The primal questions of a marriage: What are you thinking? How are you feeling? What have we done to each other?

Holden McNeil Look, man, we miss this , and I am gonna shitcan you and just hire ].

Fergus Fergie Colm You're going to do this for me, or I'm going to clip your nuts, like I clipped your daddy's.

Doug MacRay Don't talk about my father.

Fergus Fergie Colm Son, I knew your daddy. He worked for me for years. Years. Then he wanted his own thing. You play the horses? You know they either geld the horse with a knife or with chemicals. When your Daddy said no to me, I did him the chemical way. Gave your mother a taste. Got the hook into her. Ahh, she doped up good and proper. Hung herself with a wire, on Melnea Cass. And you, running around the neighborhood looking for her. Your daddy didn't have the heart to tell his son that he was looking for a suicide doper who was never coming home. If there's a Heaven, son, she ain't in it.

Bartleby My eyes are open. For the first time, I get it. When that little innocent girl let her mission slip, I had an epiphany. See in the beginning, it was just us and Him, angels and God...and then he created humans. Ours was designed to be a life of servitude and worship, and bowing and scraping and adoration. He gave them more than He ever gave us — He gave them a choice. They choose to acknowledge God, or choose to ignore Him. All this time we've been down here, I've felt the absence of the divine presence, and it's pained me, as I'm sure it must have pained you. And why? Because of the way He made us! Had we been given free will, we could choose to ignore the pain, like they do. But no — We're servants!

Loki Okay... You know, all I'm saying is that maybe one of us needs a little nap...

Bartleby Wake up! These Humans have besmirched everything He's bestowed upon them. They were given paradise — they threw it away. They were given this planet — they destroyed it. They were favored best among all His endeavors, and some of them don't even believe He exists! And in spite of it all, He has shown them infinite fucking patience at every turn. What about us? I asked you once to lay down the sword because I felt sorry for them. What was the result? Our expulsion from paradise! Where was His infinite fucking patience then? It's not right! It's not fair! We've paid our debt. Don't you think it's time, don't you think it's time we went home? And to do that, I think we may have to dispatch our would-be dispatchers.

Loki Wait, wait, wait...kill them? You're talking about the Last Scion, for Chrissake! And what about Jay and Bob? I mean, those guys were alright!

Bartleby Don't, don't my friend. See, don't let your sympathies get the best of you. They did me, once. Scion or not... she's just a human. And by passing through that arch, our sins are forgiven. No harm, no foul.

Loki My God... I've heard a rant like this before.

Bartleby What did you say?

Loki I've heard a rant like this before.

Bartleby Don't you fucking do that to me.

Loki You sound like the ]!

Bartleby You shut your fucking mouth, man!

Loki You do, you sound like ], man! You've fucking lost it! You're not talking about going home, Bartleby — you're talking about fucking war on God! Well, fuck that! I have seen what happens to the proud when they take on the throne. I'm going back to Wisconsin.

Bartleby We're going home, Loki! And no one — not you, not even the Almighty Himself — is going to make that otherwise.

Shannon Yeah, who's your favorite new kid? Yeah, call me Joey. Oh, come on. Don't make me get loose. Yeah, that's right. Call me Donnie. Oh, girl. Please don't go.

Jay God damn, this is one wacky game show.

Brodie Hey! That girl's only 15!

Shannon Ah, 15? I thought she was 36! Come on, guys. Tell me you wouldn't have popped her.

Claire Keesey I lied to the FBI.

Doug MacRay What?

Claire Keesey When the guy attacked David, I could see the back of his neck and he had a tattoo.

Doug MacRay Of what?

Claire Keesey It was one of those fighting Irish tattoos. I'm afraid if I report it they'll make me testify. What do you think I should do?

Doug MacRay You tell the FBI. If the guy's got a record, and I'm sure he does, they'll have his tattoos on file. They'll ring him up the next day. Robbery, weapons, he'll get thirty years. Of course he'll worry someone's gonna come looking for the witness. FBI will probably want to put you in a WitSec, you know, witness security. You know, he'll probably put you somewhere, like you know in uh... Cleveland or Arizona. You know, somewhere safe. Or... you could wait. You have a card, there's nothin says you gotta play it right away. You're the one who's vulnerable in this situation right now. The FBI are just people, like anyone else who want to find the bad guy so that they can go home and do their supper. You have to look out for yourself, Claire.

Claire Keesey Quite an expert.

Doug MacRay Not really. Just watch a lot of TV. I watch a lot of ]. So I'm a really big expert on all this. I know. And ] and ]. All the... all of them I have watched.

Claire Keesey You're well prepared.

Doug MacRay And ].

Bartender So, how do you like your eggs done in the morning, scrambled or fertilized?

Doug MacRay I'm thinking about um... taking a trip. Going dark for a minute.

Stephen MacRay Takin heat?

Doug MacRay Nah, just... Makin a change.

Stephen MacRay Yeah, don't tell me. "Makin a change." Either you got heat or you don't. I heard a bread truck got dropped.

Doug MacRay Oh, yeah? I didn't hear about it.

Stephen MacRay Okay.

Police Guard You got five minutes! Five minutes!

Doug MacRay Let me ask you something. In case I don't see you again. How come you never... How come you never looked for her?

Stephen MacRay Uhhhhh... Looked for who?

Doug MacRay For Ma. For my mother. How come you never looked for her? How come you never tried to call nobody or look for her, or ask around?

Stephen MacRay Look, when your mother left, you cried so hard you were throwin up. All over parlor. So I told you if you looked around you might find her. Just to give you an activity. I didn't think you'd carry it like a fuckin disease. What, you wanna think she was an angel? Go ahead. But look out your front door. How many 22 year old girls are out there, they're fuckin around with kids they don't want... and... you know... no sense in their heads. And your mother wasn't no different. That's the hard truth. I made my peace with it. You make yours. I didn't look for her because there was nothin to find. Look, I gotta die five times before I get outta here. But, I'll see you again. This side or the other.

Jack Cunningham A lot of times hurting myself trying to hurt my father.

Jack Dupree So there it is. The bond on Buddy Israel expires in eighteen hours, after that it's jump ball.