Chairman of the Board - Tensions Rise in Boardroom Confrontation
Ty:
Well, it's Her Royal Hemorrhoidiness.
Ms. Krubavitch:
You little good-for-nothing, jerkweed, halitosis heads are out of here!
Ty:
Yeah.
Ms. Krubavitch: [hands Zak a notice]
Clown Boy's check bounced! I could have you pencil-necked low-lifes arrested for that.
Ty:
I knew Edison was spending too much money on this extravagance. I was going to tell him that myself.
Zak:
Ms. K., I'm sure it was just a big mistake. I know Edison could cut us another check. Hey, is that a new housecoat?
Ms. Krubavitch:
Ohh! I want my money by the end of today, IN CASH, or you scum-sucking weasels get the BOOT!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Aging and Self-Perception Among Friends
Stevie:
Mom, no one will hire you!
Evie:
Why not?! I mean, I admit my looks are starting to go.
Coco:
Starting to go? Evie, your looks are home and in bed.
Stevie:
I think you know.
Evie:
My attitude?
Stevie:
No.
Evie:
My drinking?
Stevie:
No.
Evie:
Chronic lateness?
Stevie:
No.
Evie:
Never learned my lines?
Stevie:
No.
Evie:
The kleptomania?
Stevie:
No.
Evie:
I spread disease?
Stevie:
No!
Evie:
Then what?!
Stevie:
That little thing where you ran over a family of four while drunk off your ass?
Evie:
It was a family of six! I only killed four. And what kind of people have a picnic in their own backyard!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - The Effects of Morphine in Everyday Life
Coco:
Evie, have you ever been on morphine?
Evie:
Once, when I had my eyes done. Then every day for 10 years after that.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Unexpected Connections and Personal Stories
Jeff: [[Mary Tyler Moore]
You know ]!?
Evie:
Oh, very well! We did Night of a Thousand Stars together! Funny story: she has diabetes.
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Girls Will Be Girls - Aging and Perceptions in Social Interactions
Evie:
I'm glad I could coax you over. At first I was afraid you'd think it a bit ... strange.
Jeff:
Why, cause you're so old?
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Girls Will Be Girls - Unexpected Encounters After an Accident
Evie:
Hey, maybe I'll go on a date tonight too! That guy who hit us gave me his number!
Stevie:
He had to, ma. It's the law.
Evie:
Well did he have to flirt with me while we waited for the cops?
Stevie:
He said, "Look the fuck where you're going, you drunk corpse.
Evie:
It was more in his body language!
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Girls Will Be Girls - Introducing Characters in a Casual Encounter
Evie: [''points at Varla, trying to remember her name'']
Oh, oops, um ...
Varla:
Varla.
Evie: [''points at Stevie'']
Varla! This is my son ...
Stevie:
Stevie.
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Girls Will Be Girls - Reflections on a Tragic Loss
Varla: [Varla's mother]
Did you know her ?
Evie:
Goodness, yes! We were ... we were always running into each other at auditions. She had such a bright future, too! We were all so shocked when she offed herself.
Coco:
Evie!
Evie:
Oh, I'm sorry, passed herself away.
Varla:
Well, they shipped me off to Arkansas right after, so ... I have so many questions. What was she like?
Coco:
Very sweet.
Evie:
Uh-huh. And a big pothead!
Coco:
Evie!
Evie:
LOVED cock!
Coco:
EVIE!
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Girls Will Be Girls - Secret Past Revealed Between Friends
Coco:
Oh, Evie, when I was at Vassar, I became ... with child. And I had ... a procedure.
Evie:
That's your big secret? An abortion?!
Coco:
Have you had one?
Evie:
Coco, I've had more children pulled out of me than a burning orphanage!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Considering a Dog Instead of Kids
Coco:
What do you think about the idea of having a dog in the house?
Evie:
I'm sorry, have I been staring?
Coco:
I'm thinking of getting one. I mean, let's face it, at this point I'm probably never going to have kids.
Evie: [''Coco smiles'']
Oh, Coco, it's not too late. I'm kidding! A dog sounds fun.
Coco:
It sounds depressing, is what it sounds. "Do you have kids?" "No, but I have a dog." "Well it's the same thing, you crazy barren old hag.
Evie:
This new roommate will cheer you right up!
Coco:
I just hope she's not too loud. Or happy. Happy people always make such a racket.
Evie:
Coco, she came by and she was a peach.
Coco:
Were you drunk?
Evie:
It was 12 noon! Of course I was drunk.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Wishing for a Headache-Free Morning
Evie:
Jesus, I wish someone could tell me how to just once wake up without a splitting headache!
Coco:
You could drink less.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Empowerment and Affirmation in Self-Identity
Evie: [[w:Equal Rights Amendment|ERA]
I AM woman! ] now!
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Girls Will Be Girls - Impending Asteroid Impact in 15 Minutes
Evie: [''in her movie'' Asteroid]
Accordin to my calculat-er, the asteroid will penetrate the ass-mosphere in 15 minutes!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Girls Will Be Girls - Commercial Offer with Personal Dilemma
Evie:
You know, they offered me that commercial for Depends. Lot of money, too! Just one little problem: I don't shit my pants.
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Girls Will Be Girls - Humor in Unconventional Situations
Evie:
So I said, why am I laughing? We're doing it doggy style and your name is Barker!
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Girls Will Be Girls - A Greeting from Evie
Evie: [''puts in false teeth, glass eye, and puts wig on'']
Hello, gorgeous!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.














