Patricia French

Lloyd: How much for a beer?

Bartender: It's gratis.

Lloyd: [misunderstanding what "gratis" means] Ooh. That sounds expensive. Can you give us a moment?

Harry: Lloyd, we blew our money on the graduation robes. Maybe we shouldn't drink.

Lloyd: [notices two men finishing their beers and gets a sneaky idea] No way! I need booze, man. If I meet your daughter without a buzz on, she'll think I'm an idiot. Hey, wait a minute! What about the ol Stinkeroo?

Harry: [thinks for a moment] Yeah! I'm in.

Lloyd: [to Ms. Sourpuss as she walks by] Scuse me, ma'am.

Ms. Sourpuss: Yes?

Lloyd: This beer smells funky. Could I have a new one, please?

Ms. Sourpuss: What do you mean funky?

Lloyd: [holds out the glass for Ms. Sourpuss to sniff] Go ahead. Take a sniff.

Ms. Sourpuss: [sniffs the glass; takes the glass] EWW! I'll get you a freshie.

Harry: [holds out the hand that he scratched his butt with, only for Lloyd to hit him on the arm, reminding him to hold the glass out. Harry does so] Mine's stinky, too.

Ms. Sourpuss: [sniffs Harry's glass, then gags in disgust; takes the glass] Yours smells even WORSE! I'll be right back.

Lloyd: Yours smells even worse!

Harry: Thanks. You're really good at that, Lloyd.

Lloyd: [looks up] Well, I learned from the best. Thanks, Mom.