Memorable Quotes from Paul Dooley
3 quotesMiscommunication in a Medical Emergency
Dr. Bronson
I'm afraid I have some bad news. Your boy is very sick. He's lost a massive about of blood, and his pulse and retinal response are poor, and as you can see there's an axe sticking out of his head.
Big Chuck
He's not sick, you idiot! He's dead!
Dr. Bronson
Oh, everybody's a doctor. You think maybe I could make the diagnosis?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Challenge of Credibility in Court
Claude Elsinore
And I'd like to point out that these tapes have not been faked, or altered in any way. In fact they have time coding, which is very hard to fake.
The Judge
For the benefit of the court would you please explain "time coding.
Claude Elsinore
Well, uh... just because I don't know what it is, it doesn't mean I'm lying.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Forgotten Birthday Acknowledged in Family Conversation
Jim Baker
I was just upstairs, and I couldn't sleep. I feel like a real jerk, honey. We forgot your birthday. I bet you're really P.O.'d, huh?
Samantha
No, it's okay. I'm not really all that upset anymore.
Jim Baker
This wedding is really turning this entire house inside out. And I just came down to tell you that we did remember.
Samantha
Thanks, Dad.
Jim Baker
Happy birthday. Is something else wrong?
[Sighs]
Samantha
No, why?
Jim Baker
I don't know, I just get the feeling that something's bothering you. Something other than your birthday.
Samantha
No, I'm fine. Really.
Jim Baker
I think I know what it is. It has to do with a certain guy? I know, honey. I know. We're all upset that Ginny's marrying a bohunk. What's the matter?
Samantha
I meant Jake.
[Sighs]
Jim Baker
Jake? Wait a minute. I thought she said his name was Rudy.
Samantha
Forget it.
Jim Baker
Forget what? Who's Jake?
Samantha
He's a boy, Daddy. It's nothing. Okay? Just forget it, please.
Jim Baker
Come on, Sam. We're not communicating.
Samantha
It's extremely embarrassing, okay?
Jim Baker
What's embarrassing?
Samantha
Sitting in the dark with your dad, telling him about your love life.
Jim Baker
I'm afraid you lost me again, Sam.
Samantha
Jake is a senior, and he's beautiful and perfect. I like him a real lot, and he doesn't like me. Okay?
Jim Baker
Oh.
Samantha
And he's got this incredible girlfriend. I'm just this ridiculous dork that's following him around like a puppy.
Jim Baker
Why do you think you're a dork? I don't think you're a dork. I don't think Mom thinks you're a dork.
Samantha
Mike thinks I'm a dork.
Jim Baker
Mike is a dork.
Samantha
But so am I.
Jim Baker
Well, if it's any consolation, I love you. And if this guy can't see in you all the beautiful and wonderful things that I see, then he's got the problem.
Samantha
I know. It just hurts.
Jim Baker
That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call em something else.
Samantha
But if I were Ginny, I'd have this guy crawling on his knees.
Jim Baker
Well, let me tell you something about Ginny. Now, I love her as much as I love you. But she's a different person. Sometimes I worry about her. When you're given things kind of easily, you don't always appreciate them. With you, I'm not worried. When it happens to you, Samantha, it'll be forever.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.