Woody Harrelson

Woody Harrelson Quotes

Actor
Brothers Season 1 - Cast at the Global Premiere
Brothers Season 1 - Woody Harrelson and Matthew McConaughey at the Global Premiere
Brothers Season 1 - Laura Louie and Woody Harrelson at the Global Premiere
Brothers Season 1 - First Look at Woody Harrelson and Matthew McConaughey
Brothers Season 1 - First Look at Matthew McConaughey and Woody Harrelson in Texas Style
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Memorable Quotes from Woody Harrelson

100 quotes
Debate on Pre-Fight Intimacy
Cesar Dominguez I thought we were not supposed to get laid for a couple of weeks before a fight.
Vince Boudreau Says who?
Cesar Dominguez Everybody knows that. You know, it's an energy thing...
Vince Boudreau All the great ones got laid before they fought! I mean, the more the better, man.
Cesar Dominguez You never told me that!
Vince Boudreau Yeah, well, I thought you knew, man. The words go together: Champion and pussy. Champion, pussy. Just think about it. It's a natural.
Cesar Dominguez Oh, Jesus Christ!
[Starting to laugh]
Trauma and Revelation in Althea's Life
Althea I had an epiphany once, Larry.
Larry Flynt What was that?
Althea When my daddy shot my entire family in the head and I was the only one to identify the bodies, and I was sent to an orphanage full of good Christian nuns who shoved my face into their pussies with their cruxifixes on for eight goddamn years!
Fridge Material Versus Serial Killer Wall
Teddy What's that, for your little serial killer wall?
[''About his minute photos'']
The Man From Toronto You think you'd make the wall? Come on, man. You're barely fridge material.
Questioning Food Choices in Semi-Pro
Ed Monix Jackie, what are you eating?
Jackie I think it's a pancake...
Monix How long's that been there Jackie?
Jackie It's been here a while...
Value and Opinion in Decision Making
Larry Flynt What'd you think?
[''Looking at the first issue of the Hustler newsletter'']
Jimmy Flynt How much do they cost?
Larry Flynt Will you forget money for one second! What'd you think?
[shakes his head]
Jimmy Flynt What I think depends on how much they cost.
Larry Flynt This is the first Hustler newsletter. It's all for the man on the go and man-about-town. Here's news service and pictures.
Jimmy Flynt It's a magazine. How are you going to pay for that?
Larry Flynt Don't interrupt me when I'm talking!
Everyone Has Opinions, Just Like Assholes
Larry Flynt Opinions are like assholes, everybody's got one.
The Power of Love Against Inner Demons
Mickey Knox You know, the only thing that kills the demon... is love.
Negotiating a Plea Bargain in Court
Alan Isaacman Listen, I'm sitting here with the eminently reasonable District Attorney of the state of Georgia. Right. He's very impressed by your conversion, he wants to cut us a plea bargain.
[''On the phone'']
Larry Flynt A plea bargain? Because I've found God?
Alan Isaacman Larry, listen to me for a second: Don't argue with me on this, okay? Just say yes because I've pulled a lot of strings to make this happen.
Larry Flynt Is he sitting there with you?
Alan Isaacman Yes, he is.
Larry Flynt Would you do me a favor? Just tell that miserable old gray-haired bastard to go fuck himself, we're going to trial.
Alan Isaacman Okay, right.
Larry Flynt Oh, and praise the lord.
Preparing for Deadly Competitors in the Arena
Haymitch Abernathy Cashmere and Gloss, brother and sister, District 1. They won back-to-back games, Capitol favorites, lots of sponsors, they will be lethal. and the other half of the career pack, Brutus and Enobaria.
[points to a TV; TV changes]
Katniss Everdeen What's with her teeth?
Haymitch Abernathy She had them filed into fangs so she could rip people's throats out.
Peeta Mellark She's committed, I'll give her that.
Haymitch Abernathy Wiress and Beetee. Not fighters, but brilliant. And weird. Real tech-savvy. He won his games by electrocuting six tributes at once. The Morphlings, masters of camouflage. They won their games by hiding until everyone was dead. Self medicating ever since, which I applaud; not a threat.
[TV changes; TV changes; TV changes to Finnick Odair]
Katniss Everdeen Finnick Odair, right?
Haymitch Abernathy Yes he won his games at 14, youngest ever. Extremely humble.
Katniss Everdeen You're kidding.
Haymitch Abernathy Yes I'm kidding, he's a peacock. A total preener. But he's the Capitol darling, they love him here. Charming, smart, and very skilled in combat, especially in water.
Peeta Mellark Any weaknesses?
Haymitch Abernathy One. Mags. She volunteered for Annie. Mags was his mentor and basically raised him. If he's trying to protect her in any way, it exposes him.
Katniss Everdeen A guy like that should know she's not going to make it. I bet when it really comes down to it, he won't protect her.
Haymitch Abernathy Well, Katniss, I hope when she goes, she goes quickly. She's actually a wonderful lady.
LBJ
Afirmation of No Presidential Ambitions
Lyndon B. Johnson I have zero intention of running for President.
Vengeance Over Insanity: A Character's Perspective
Cletus Kasady / Carnage I'm not a crazy man. I am a vengeful one.
A Wicked Presence Approaches
Cletus Kasady / Carnage Something.... wicked.... this way... COMES!
Confrontation Over Online Presence and Accountability
The Man from Toronto You think you know me? I know you. I looked at your little online gym channel. Seven views. With one upload three years ago. And seven views.
Teddy Yeah. Three comments.
The Man from Toronto Yeah. You think a low toner got you into this situation? No. Never doing what you say you're gonna do is what got you into this situation.
Basketball Identity and Perception
Billy Hoyle Yo, pretty boy! I looked up basketball player in the dictionary and it said Not you!'.
Miscommunication About Relationships
The Man from Toronto Who's she with?
Teddy Her friend, Anne. Why?
The Man from Toronto You didn't tell me about Anne.
Teddy I didn't know that I had to tell you about Anne. What's the problem?
[''The Man from Toronto sighs and gets uncomfortable'']
The Man from Toronto I get uncomfortable... around women.
The Ideal Client: Fun, Wealthy, and Troublesome
Larry Flynt You don't want to quit me, I'm your dream client: I'm the most fun, I'm rich, and I'm always in trouble.
[''to Alan'']
Embracing the Moment of Focus
Billy Hoyle I'm in a fuckin zone!
A Confrontation Between Leaders and Their Fates
The Colonel ]...and ]. ]...and ]. ] and ]... You're probably not much of a reader, but this is a big moment. Where were you? We came upon your herd. We got lucky. I was surprised you weren't with them.
[[Ulysses S. Grant|Grant; [w: Stephen D. Lee|Lee; [Arthur Wellesley, 1st Duke of Wellington|Wellington; [Napoleon Bonaparte|Napoleon; [w: George Armstrong Custer|Custer; [Sitting Bull]
Preacher Hey! Hey! Hey!
The Colonel I hope you don't come to regret sparing his life. He's quite a good shot. Have you finally come to save your apes?
Caesar I came for you.
The Colonel For me? Who did I kill that night?
Caesar My wife. My son.
The Colonel I'm sorry. I was there for you. My God. Look at your eyes. Almost human.
Misconceptions About Safe Havens in Zombieland
Columbus You know there's a place untouched by all this crap?
Tallahassee Back east, yeah?
Columbus Yeah. Yeah. You heard the same thing?
Tallahassee Out west, we hear it's back east. Back east, they hear it's out west. It's all just nonsense. You know, you're like a penguin on the North Pole who hears the South Pole is really nice this time of the year.
Columbus There are no penguins on the North Pole.
Tallahassee You wanna feel how hard I can punch?
Shared Ownership and Connection
Cletus Kasady / Carnage What's mine is yours and what's yours is mine.
The End of America and Humanity
Charlie Frost This marks the last day of the United States of America. And, by tomorrow, all of mankind. And we will be visible from the Milky Way as a tiny little puff of smoke. I'm watching the earth crumble before my eyes. The giant ash cloud created by this super-volcano will first envelop Vegas and then St. Louis and then Chicago and then, at long last, Washington, D.C. will have its lights go out! I have goosebumps, people! I wish you could see what I'm seeing, people! I WISH YOU COULD BE HERE WITH ME! OH, BABY... BRING IT ON!! ALWAYS REMEMBER FOLKS: YOU HEARD IT FIRST FROM CHARLIE!!!!
[broadcasting live as the Yellowstone Caldera is about to erupt; the Yellowstone Caldera explodes; gets slightly thrown back by the shockwave, then gets back up; spreads out arms; is hit by a massive rock and killed]
The Last Box of Twinkies
Tallahassee There's a box of Twinkies in that Grocery Store. Not just any Twinkies, the last box of Twinkies that anyone will enjoy in the whole universe. believe it or not, Twinkies have an expiration date, and someday soon, life's little Twinkie gauge is gonna go...empty.
Discussion on Beauty Standards in Media
Althea Her tits look nice
[''Flipping through [[w:Playboy (magazine)|an issue of Playboy]
Larry Flynt They look nice but they don't look real. I don't understand this magazine fuzzy pictures, articles on I don't know what the hell their talking about.
Confrontation Over a Romantic Interest
Grace Santiago Hey! Hey! That's my man! Get your hands off my man! Are you bitches crazy? You wanna get hurt, that's what it is!
[staggers towards platform women; pretending to be drunk; pulls her sleeves and clenches her fists as she runs towards them]
Woman on Platform We're sorry, we didn't know it was your man!
Grace Santiago Get the hell outta here! Yeah, you better run!
[tries to attack them]
Woman on Platform It's your fault! You started it!
[to her friend as they leave the station]
Woman on Platform Me? I didn't start anything!
Grace Santiago I turn my back for one minute and you're doggin me?
[to John]
John They were huuge!!
Charlie Oh, she's beautiful.
[back at the booth]
Grace Santiago Now, you wait right there, all right. You wait right there, and don't you let me see you talkin to -
[positioning John on the poles]
Grace Santiago You nasty. What you lookin at? I could kick your ass, too. Shit.
[gives a male passerby a dirty look]
Embracing Risks in Life
Mr. Bruner Life's about taking risks. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there.
Freedom of Speech for All
Larry Flynt If ] will protect a scumbag like me, it will protect all of you.
[[w:First Amendment to the United States Constitution|the First Amendment]
Confrontational Response to an Insult
Billy Hoyle Who you callin a pilgrim motherfucker? Gobble this turkey!
A Dark Reflection on Happiness and Loneliness
Mr. Bruner Wow. I actually was writing my own suicide note just now. “I have 32 fleeting minutes of happiness during lunch, which has been eaten up again and again by the same especially badly dressed student, and I finally thought I would rather have the dark nothingness. It sounds so relaxing. Have a nice life without me, fuckers.”
Questioning Sexual Orientation
Tommy Bollinger Still not gay?
[repeated line]
Lessons Learned in Isolation
The Man from Toronto I was raised by my grandfather on a frozen lake 50 miles from nowhere. He was a kind man. He taught me many useful things.
Unexpected Responses in a Conversation
Monix Vakidis, open the window, will ya?
Vakidis Yes, right on! (does nothing)
Monix Vakidis, did you give Bobby Dee a handjob?
Vakidis Yes, right on!
A Serious Conversation About Mental Health
Nadine Hey.
Mr. Bruner Busy.
Nadine I don't wanna take up a ton of your time, but I'm gonna kill myself. I just thought an adult should know.
Tallahassee's Frustration with Zombies
Tallahassee Where are ya, ya spongy yellow delicious bastards?! Where are ya?!
[looking through a fried-Twinkie stand]
Choosing Not to Engage with Hustler Magazine
Larry Flynt If you don't like Hustler magazine, don't read it.
Truth and Belief in Court Testimony
Mantke Clerk Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you, God?
Larry Flynt No.
Judge Thomas Alva Mantke No?
Larry Flynt Your Honor, I'm an atheist. I can't very well, uh, swear to a God I don't believe exists.
Judge Thomas Alva Mantke Mr. Flynt, you are a handful.
Larry Flynt I know, Your Honor.
Building Shelters from Bricks and Tension
Billy Hoyle You still putting up bricks? What is this a masons convention? Clang!! Clang!! I need welding torch to play in this leauge. Lets stop right now and gather up all these bricks and build a shelter for the homeless so that your mother will have a place to live. I want your Mother and Sister out of my house immediately !!
The People vs. Larry Flynt - Larry Flynt
Larry Flynt What is more obscene: Sex or war?
A Conversation About 19th-Century Poetry
Teddy Here's a little secret of mine. I love 19th-century American poetry. It's my hobby.
The Man from Toronto Let's hear some ].
[[John Keats|Keats]
Teddy You wanna hear her old stuff or her new stuff?
The Man from Toronto Well, he... died at 25.
The Complexity of Destruction Without Hate
Vince Boudreau You don't have to hate a man to completely destroy him.
One-upping Stories in Zombieland
Columbus Are you one of these guys that tries to one-up everybody else's story?
Tallahassee No. I knew ] way worse at that than me.
[[w:Cliff Clavin|a guy]
Power, Money, and Commitment in Conflict
Alan Isaacman You don't see me running around, pissing off everybody we're trying to get to help us.
Larry Flynt Yeah, well, you can walk and you can fuck and I'm in this chair! And I got money, okay, and I got money and that gives me the power to shake up this system.
Alan Isaacman Well, find somebody else to help you then, because, this is not what I signed on for. I don't even know what we're engaged in anymore, Larry. If you get on that plane, I quit.
Larry Flynt Alan, don't be so melodramatic. You don't wanna quit me. I'm your dream client: I'm the most fun, I'm rich and I'm always in trouble.
The Consequences of Humanity's Hubris
Caesar I think you have no ].
[[mercy]
The Colonel You came here to kill me. Were you going to show me mercy?
Caesar I showed you mercy when I spared your men. I offered you peace and you killed my family.
The Colonel Mercy. Do you have any idea what your mercy would do to us? You're much stronger than we are. You're smart as hell. No matter what you say, you'd eventually replace us. That's the law of ]. The irony is, we created you. We tried to defy Nature, bend it to our will. Nature has been punishing us for our ] ever since. Ten months ago, I sent out recon units to look for your base. My own son was a soldier with one of the units. One day, he suddenly stopped speaking. He became primitive, like an animal. They contacted me and said that they thought he'd lost his mind, ]. Then the man who cared for him stopped speaking too. Their medic had a theory, before he stopped speaking, that the virus that almost wiped us out, the virus that every human survivor still carries, had suddenly changed. Mutated. And that, if it spread, it would destroy humanity for good this time. Not by killing us, but by robbing us of those things that make us human. Our speech, our higher thinking. It would turn us into beasts. You talk about mercy? What would you have done? It was a moment of ] for me. I realized that I would have to sacrifice my only son, so that humanity could be saved. I held that gun in my hand for a long time... And I pointed it at my only child. He looked at me with trust in his eyes. Even in his primitive gaze, I felt his... love. I pulled the trigger. It purified me. It made my purpose clear. I gave orders to kill the others infected, all of them. Burn their belongings, anything that might spread contamination. Some of the men questioned my judgment. I was asking them to do what I had done, to sacrifice their friends, their family. Of course, they refused. I had them killed too. Others with children deserted into the woods. One of those ]s fled to my superiors up north. They tried to convince me that this plague could be dealt with medically. Thats when I realized that they had learned nothing from our past.
[[Nature; [arrogance; [PTSD|that the war was too much for him; [clarity; [coward]
Caesar You killed them too?
The Colonel What did I do, Preacher?
Preacher You severed their heads, sir.
The Colonel Except for the one I spared so he could return and deliver a message. If they wanted to relieve me of my command, they'd have to meet me here, and do it themselves. This used to be a weapons depot. They turned it into a relocation camp when the crisis was just beginning. But the weapons are all still here, inside the mountain.
Caesar How many men will be coming?
The Colonel Probably all of them. But don't get any ideas, the only thing they fear more than me is you apes. This is a holy war. All of human history has led to this moment. If we lose, we'll be the last of our kind. It will be a planet of apes, and we'II become your cattle. Look at you. You think I am sick, don't you? I didn't mean to kill your son. But if his destiny was to inherit your unholy kingdom... I am glad I did.
The Colonel So emotional! I see how conflicted you are. You are confused in your purpose. You're angry at me for something I did that was an act of war. But you're taking this all much far too personally. What do you think my men would have done to your apes, if you had killed me? Or is killing me more important?
Unexpected Encounter with a Comedy Legend
Bill Murray Is that how you say hello where you come from?
[after Columbus shoots him]
Columbus Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I can't believe I shot Bill Murray.
[realizing]
Tallahassee Mr. Murray?
Bill Murray I'm just Bill, I think, now.
Tallahassee Bill?
Bill Murray Yeah?
Tallahassee I don't think we're gonna be able to stitch this.
[pokes at Bill's wound]
Bill Murray Ah. That's still tender.
Tallahassee You think you might pull through?
Bill Murray No.
Columbus If it means anything now, I am so sorry. It was just instinctive.
Bill Murray It was my bad. I was never a very good practical joker.
Little Rock So do you have any regrets?
Bill Murray ], maybe.
[[w:Garfield: The Movie|Garfield; gives a long exhale, like a death rattle...then inhales and does another one before he dies]
Wichita I'm sorry, he just gets me...but it's very sad.
[suddenly starts snorting and laughing softly, everyone looks at her]
Columbus Yeah.
Confronting Boundaries and Respecting Personal Space
Roy Munson Take that, you freaky piece of shit. You don't mow another guy's lawn.
Navigating Friendship Challenges in Adolescence
Mr. Bruner Are you having a problem today, Nadine?
Nadine Several. I don't really have any friends at the moment.
The Illusion of Winning the Games
Haymitch Abernathy Nobody ever wins the Games. Period. There are survivors. There's no winners.
The Challenge of Maintaining Appearances
Billy Hoyle It is hard God damn work, making something this pretty look like a chump!
The Consequences of Creation and Conflict
Opening Text Fifteen years ago, a scientific experiment gone wrong gave ] to a species of intelligent apes... and destroyed most of humanity with a virus that became known as the Simian Flu. With the ] of a new ape civilization led by Caesar, the surviving humans struggled to coexist... but fighting finally broke out when a rebel ape, Koba, led a vengeful attack against the humans. The humans sent a distress call to a military base in the North where all that remained of the U.S. Army was gathered. A ruthless Special Forces Colonel and his hardened battalion were dispatched to exterminate the apes. Evading capture for the last two years, Caesar is now rumored to be marshaling the fight from a hidden command base in the woods... as the WAR rages on...
[[Rise of the Planet of the Apes|RISE; [Dawn of the Planet of the Apes|DAWN]
Red Ape I don't fear you. You must fear! How long you think woods can protect you? Humans destroy you. Their Colonel has all power. For them, he more than just human. He everything. He say: "First Caesar die... then all of you die.
Koba Ape not kill ape.
The Colonel All of human history has lead to this moment. The irony is we created you. And nature has been punishing us ever since. This is our last stand. And if we lose... it will be a Planet of Apes.
Rocket Feeling better? Good. Then we can talk about... Escape. Apes together strong!
A Unique Performance Announcement in Las Vegas
Merritt McKinney Thank you. Tonight we would like to try something that will, well, set us a bit apart.
Henley Reeves For our final trick, we're gonna do something never before seen on a Las Vegas stage.
Jack Wilder Or any stage for that matter.
Daniel Atlas Ladies and gentlemen, tonight we are going to rob a bank.
Identity Beyond the Monster
Cletus Kasady / Carnage I’m a killer. With or without the monster, Eddie.
Misunderstanding in a Zombie Encounter
Tallahassee Bill Murray, you're a zombie?
[shocked]
Bill Murray Ow, I'm on fire! Ouch!
[cries in pain]
Tallahassee You're not a zombie, you're talking and...You're okay?
[surprised]
Bill Murray The hell I am!
Wichita I'm sorry. I didn't know it was...It was "you" you.
[also surprised]
Tallahassee Are you...? What's with the get-up?
Bill Murray Oh, I do it to blend in. You know. Zombies don't mess with other zombies. Buddy of mine, makeup guy, he showed me how to do this. Corn starch. You know, some berries, a little licorice for the ladies. Suits my lifestyle, you know. I like to get out and do stuff. Just played nine holes on the Riviera. Just walked on. Nobody there.
Tallahassee Goddamn it! Bill-Fucking-Murray! I had to get that out. I don't mean to gush. This is so surreal. I mean, you probably get this all the time. Maybe not lately, but I'm such a huge fan of yours. You know, I swear, I've seen every one of your movies a million times. I even loved your dramatic roles and just everything. Six people left in the world and one of them is Bill-Fucking-Murray. I know that's not your middle name. I've been watching you since I was like...Since I could masturbate. I mean, not that they're connected. I gratefully respect you.
[growing excited]
Questioning the Oath of Truth
Mantke Clerk Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help yo God?
Larry Flynt No.
Judge Mantke No?
Larry Flynt Your honor, ]. I can't very well, uh, swear to a God I don't believe exists.
[[w:atheism|I'm an atheist]
Judge Mantke Mr. Flynt, you are a handful.
Larry Flynt I know, your honor.
Desire for Connection in Isolation
Cletus Kasady / Carnage I wanted your friendship...
[last words]
Anticipating the Arrival of Chaos
Cletus Kasady / Carnage Soon come chaos. Chaos soon come.
A Complicated Connection Between Two Characters
Mr. Bruner You’re complicated and simple. I feel this connection between us. I feel like I already know you.” This is kinda sweet. I think you’re over-reacting. “I’ll give you head. I want you to put your mouth on my tits. I want to feel you inside me. We can do it in the Petland stockroom.
[reading Nadine’s message; pause, awkward]
Nadine Oh my God. Say something! Please help me!
Mr. Bruner You need to watch out for run-on sentences.
Supreme Court Concerns Over Larry Flynt's Conduct
Alan Isaacman Larry, thousands of people petition the Supreme Court, okay? Thousands.
Larry Flynt Yeah, and our case is as good as any.
Alan Isaacman Our case is better than most, you're missing my point, and that is they will never pick you. Because you're a nightmare. They're afraid if they let you in there, you're gonna wear a diaper, or throw oranges at the justices, and they should be, Larry, because in all the times you've gone to the court asking for help, you've never once demonstrated any respect for its institutions and procedures.
Commitment to a Life of Adventure
Tobias Beckett If you come with us, you're in this life for good.
Blood Tastes Different, Secrets Unveiled
Cletus Kasady / Carnage I have tasted blood before, my friend, and that is not it. Eddie's got a secret!
The Anarchist View of Church Music
Grace Pasic I love church music...
Vince Boudreau Church music? It's too good for the church. JESUS was too good for the church, ya ask me. You know, he shook things up. He was, uh, he was an ANARCHIST, ya know? He, uh, he threw the money lenders outta the temple. First thing he's gonna do when he comes back is torch the Vatican!
Grace Pasic Vince, come on!
Twinkies and Regrets in Zombieland
Little Rock No Twinkies.
Tallahassee Shit! Fuck!
Wichita See, I told you we should've gone to Russell Crowe's, but nobody ever listens to me!
Confronting Insults with Defiance
Roy Munson Who you calling psycho?!?!
LBJ
Debate on the Farm Bill's Impact
Lyndon B. Johnson Senator Yarborough.
Ralph Yarborough Mr. Leader, I still don't take a drink. Now, if you've called me in here to ask me about my vote on the Farm Bill, I should tell you that I have not changed my position in the slightest.
Lyndon B. Johnson No problem, no problem at all. Uh... But listen, while I've got you here, there's only one question I've been meaning to ask you. Have you got shit for brains? What the hell is your problem with this Farm Bill?
Ralph Yarborough We should be doing a heck of a lot more for people who have less.
Lyndon B. Johnson The only thing more irritating than a liberal is a liberal from Texas.
Celebrating Work Ethic and Global Competitiveness
Tommy Bollinger A work ethic. I love it! That is why this country is still number one. Well, behind Germany and France and Belgium and Japan and China. Thank God for Bangladesh!
Friendship and Wealth in Larry Flynt's Life
Larry Flynt These are my friends - lots of money, lots of friends.
Unexpected Skills in Zombie Survival
Tallahassee My momma always told me "Someday you'll be good at somethin'." Who'd have guessed that somethin would be zombie killin'?
Wealth and Power in Challenging the System
Larry Flynt I got money, which gives me the power to shake up the system.
Controversial Imagery in Courtroom Testimony
Simon Leis Mr. Flynt, can you please turn to page 77? Can you describe to the jury what is on that page, please sir?
Larry Flynt It's a picture of ].
[[w:Santa Claus|Santa Claus]
Simon Leis What is Santa Claus doing?
Larry Flynt He's talking to Mrs. Claus, and holding in his hand what appears to be a large, erect penis.
Simon Leis And could you read the caption underneath that cartoon, please?
Larry Flynt This is what I've got to ho-ho-ho about.
Confrontation in The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Romulus Thread Move. You want another?
[''raises his whip'']
Katniss Everdeen Go ahead.
Haymitch Abernathy Whoah, whoah, whoah!
[''hurrying in between them'']
Romulus Thread Get out of my way!
[''aims at Haymitch'']
Haymitch Abernathy Y-you don't wanna shoot her.
Romulus Thread How bout I shoot both of ya?
Haymitch Abernathy Look, Commander, you're new here. Trust me, I'm trying to help. I'm Haymitch. You recognize her? Katniss Everdeen? Darling of the Capitol?
Romulus Thread She interfered with a Peacekeeper.
Haymitch Abernathy I never said she was smart! Look, I- you already got a couple of lashes in-
Romulus Thread That's not good enough; she's an agitator!
[''jerks his pistol to the right as Peeta approaches him'']
Peeta Mellark Easy. Easy.
Haymitch Abernathy Look, you sure Snow wants three dead Victors here? Cause that's what we're looking at. It's bad enough that you marked up her face on the eve of the big wedding. Let it go. And we will, too.
Romulus Thread All right. Okay. But next time, it's the firing squad.
Haymitch Abernathy Excellent idea.
Romulus Thread I don't care who she is. Clear the square! You’re all under curfew! Anyone out after dark will be shot on sight! Get em outta here.
[shouting angrily; turns to the crowd, still shouts; ''turns back to Haymitch'']
Defiance Against Expectations in The Hunger Games
Haymitch Abernathy They aren't very happy with you.
Katniss Everdeen Why, because I didn't die?
Abernathy Because you showed them up.
Everdeen Well. I'm sorry it didn't go the way they'd planned; you know, I'm not very happy with them either-
[sarcastic]
Abernathy Katniss. This is serious. And not just for you. They don't take these things lightly.
Frustration Amidst Zombie Chaos
Columbus Hey, for fuck's sake, enough already! We are being chased by ravenous freaks. Like we don't have enough problems. "Oh, they stole my Hummer. Oh, we have trust issues." Well get over it! We can't just fucking drive down the road playing I Spy or some shit for two hours like four normal-ass Americans? Fuck me.
Tallahassee Whoa.
Columbus I know.
Reputation Defined by One Action
Vince Boudreau If a man builds 1,000 bridges and sucks one dick, they don't call him a bridge-builder... they call him a cocksucker.
Joining the Crew Proposal
Tobias Beckett Hey, kid. I'm putting together a crew. You in?
[Chewbacca makes an affirmative growl]
Han Solo That's yes.
Confronting challenges with urgency and resolve
Tallahassee Time to nut up or shut up.
Embracing Passion for Life and Music
Billy Hoyle Keep singin guys... My old man was a preacher... I love this shit!
The Predictability of People
Tobias Beckett People are predictable.
Confrontation Between Two Reluctant Survivors
Carson Wells Buenos días. I'm guessing this isn't the future you had planned for yourself when you first clapped eyes on that money. Don't worry. I'm not the man who's after you.
Llewelyn Moss I know that. I've seen him.
Wells You've seen him, and you're not dead?
Moss What's this guy supposed to be, the ultimate badass?
Wells No, I wouldn't describe him as that.
Moss How would you describe him?
Wells I guess I would say he doesn't have a sense of humor.
Unexpected Request in a Private Moment
Althea Leasure Larry?
Larry Flynt Yeah?
Althea Leasure Take off your pants.
Larry Flynt What?
[''Grins'']
Althea Leasure Take off your pants.
Larry Flynt Why?
Althea Leasure Because I've never fucked a millionaire before.
[''Shows him the profit sheet'']
Versatile Skills of Riding and Dancing
Pepper Lewis If it's got hair, I can ride it. If it's got a beat, I can dance to it.
Tallahassee Reflects on Unexpected Success
Tallahassee Finally got to first base. Not bad for that scrawny little spit-fuck.
[about Columbus, after seeing him kiss Wichita]
A Long-Awaited Reunion Between Rivals
Cletus Kasady / Carnage Welcome back, Eddie Brock. It's been a long time. I miss you... so much!
A Rare Moment of Vulnerability
Tallahassee I haven't cried like that since ].
[silently crying about losing his 3-year-old son to the zombies; [w:Titanic (1997 film)|Titanic]
LBJ
Reflections on Race and Rights in America
Lyndon B. Johnson You know, about a year ago, my private cook Mrs. Wright, who you know was driving from here down to the ranch in Texas. So I asked her if she would mind bringing my dog, Little Beagle Johnson, with her in order that he could be there when I got home. Mrs. Wright respectfully declined. She said it is hard enough for a black woman driving through the South without having a dog to worry about. Finding a place to eat, to sleep, to use the restroom. The personal cook of the vice president of the United States has to drive through towns without stopping , then squat to pee by the side of the road. Hundred years ago, she would've been a slave. Hundred years from now, hell, she might be... president. But today, we live in a time of too much uncertainty. Where can she eat? Where can she sleep? Can she vote? And if she does, will she be harassed for casting that vote? Can she attend school? If so, which school? Can she travel the cities and towns of this land without fearing for her safety? What rights that belong to the men in this room should not be afforded to her?
Preparing for the Spotlight on Television
Jackie There'll be a lotta television cameras out there so we just gotta be tip top.
Clarence Coffee Black So what's the plan?
Jackie Brought a secret weapon. It's going to make us look extra cool on TV.
Bee Bee Ellis What the hell is that?
Jackie It's eyeliner, dummy! Now who's first? Monix?
Monix Oh, yeah... Let me get a fresh Maxi-Pad outta my purse.
Questioning Freedom and Personal Sacrifice
Larry Flynt Why do I have to go to jail to protect your freedom?
Recognition of Anton Chigurh's Identity
Man Who Hires Wells You know Anton Chigurh by sight. Is that correct?
Carson Wells Yes, sir. I know him every which way.
Man Who Hires Wells When did you last see him?
Wells Uh, November 28th of last year.
Man Who Hires Wells You seem pretty sure of the date. Did I ask you to sit?
Wells No sir, but you struck me as a man who wouldn't want to waste a chair.
[sitting down]
Missing Floor in a Tall Building
Carson Wells You know, I, uh, counted the floors of this building from the street.
Man Who Hires Wells And?
Wells Well, there's one missing.
Man Who Hires Wells We'll look into it.
Questions About Chigurh's Reputation
Man Who Hires Wells How well do you know Chigurh?
Carson Wells Well enough.
Man Who Hires Wells That's not an answer.
Wells What do you want to know?
Man Who Hires Wells I'd just like to know your opinion of him in general. Just how dangerous is he?
Wells Compared to what, bubonic plague? He's bad enough you called me. He's a psychopathic killer, but so what? There's plenty of em around.
Man Who Hires Wells He killed three men in a motel in Del Rio yesterday, and two others at that colossal goatfuck out in the desert.
Wells We can stop that.
Man Who Hires Wells You seem pretty sure of yourself. You've led something of a charmed life, haven't you, Mr. Wells?
Wells In all honesty, I can't say that charm has had a whole lot to do with it.
Life's Struggles and Enduring Challenges
Roy Munson The world can really kick your ass. I only have a VAGUE recollection of when it wasn't kickin mine.
Connection Between Cletus and Eddie
Cletus Kasady / Carnage I've been thinking about you, Eddie, because you and I are the same.
The People vs. Larry Flynt - Dialogue 5
Larry Flynt Do you know how many rooms I have here?
[''To his parents while showing them around his new mansion during [[w:Independence Day (United States)|a 4th of July party]
Pa Flynt How many?
Larry Flynt Twenty four rooms, do you know who else has twenty four rooms?
Pa Flynt ]
[[w:President of the United States|The president?]
Larry Flynt ]
[[w:Hugh Hefner|Hugh Hefner]
Tributes Seek Allies in the Arena
Haymitch Abernathy Good news. At least half the tributes want you as allies.
Peeta Mellark They saw her shoot.
Haymitch Abernathy Well, sweetheart, you got your pick of the litter.
Katniss Everdeen I want Wiress and Beetee.
Peeta Mellark Johanna calls them "Nuts" and "Volts".
Haymitch Abernathy OK, good. Who else?
Katniss Everdeen Mags. All right, fine. Then no one.
[Peeta turns away in disapproval]
Haymitch Abernathy I'll tell them you're still making up your mind.
Different Priorities in Competition
Billy Hoyle A white man wants to win first, look good second. A black man wants to look good first, win second.
Inclusivity in Larry Flynt's Establishment
Larry Flynt Thank you all for coming. Welcome to my establishment, we welcome Christians in here too.
[''Walking past protesters protesting outside his strip club'']
Recruitment for a Major Job Opportunity
Tobias Beckett Heard about a job. Big shot gangster, putting together a crew.
Artistry in Controversial Photography
Larry Flynt Look, we're not running a flower shop here. We're selling the girl. So stop playing with all the props and pillows and flowers and just shoot the girl.
[''Frustrated at the stills photographer'']
Stills Photographer Let's go for the leg thing spread your legs a little wider.
[''To the model during a photo shoot'']
Larry Flynt There, that's exactly what we want, that's perfect a woman's vagina has just as much personality as her face.
[''Walks up to the model and spreads her legs even wider'']
Stills Photographer But you can't show the genitalia.
Larry Flynt Why not?
[''Disappointed, confused'']
Jimmy Flynt He's right. Legally, you can't show it.
Larry Flynt Shut up. Are you religious man?
[''To Jimmy'']
Stills Photographer Yeah.
Larry Flynt You believe God created man?
Stills Photographer Yeah.
Larry Flynt And God created woman?
Stills Photographer Yeah.
Larry Flynt Surely the same God created her vagina, and who are you to defy God? Just shoot it.
A Compliment on Basketball and Appearance
Billy Hoyle You're too pretty to play basketball, you know that? You got that Z in your fro! Hey man, what are you, the Black Zorro?
Navigating Unlikely Alliances in Zombieland
Columbus You know, Tallahassee and Columbus are, both uh...east.
Tallahassee So?
Columbus So, Tallahassee, you wanna stick together? At least - at least for a while?
Tallahassee Here's the deal, Columbus. Uh, I'm not easy to get along with, and I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch, so, uh, I'll get this relationship to about Texarkana.
Columbus Really? Yeah. You'll take me as far as Texarkana.
Tallahassee You're a peppy little spit fuck, aren't you?
Columbus You might wanna buckle up, you know for safety.
Tallahassee I can tell already, you are gonna get on my nerves.
A Clash of Perspectives in Corporate Change
Blow Dried Jerk Uh, Mr. Flynt? I don't wanna step on your toes, but things have changed since you were actively running the company. I mean, I look back at the stuff you did in the 70s, and it was, uh, sorta racy and crazy. But the country is different now. ] ].
[[w:Ronald Reagan|Reagan; [w:Political positions of Ronald Reagan|has rebuilt America and the moral majority is gaining power]
Larry Flynt You're fired.
Blow Dried Jerk Excuse me?
Larry Flynt You get the fuck out of my building. Doug, get him out of here. You blow-dried jerk motherfucker. Take him out of here and throw him in the incinerator, cut him to little pieces and feed him to the animals out there. Get out of here!
The Obscenity of Sex Versus War
Larry Flynt I think the real obscenity comes from raisin our youth to believe that sex is bad and ugly and dirty and yet it is heroic to go spill guts and blood in the most ghastly manner in the name of humanity. With all the taboos attached to sex, it's no wonder we have the problems we have. It's no wonder we're angry and violent and genocidal. But ask yourself the question. What is more obscene? Sex or war?
Judgment of Taste in the Courtroom
Larry Flynt Twenty-five years? All I'm guilty of is bad taste.
[''Incredulous after prison sentence'']