16 quotes
Airline Charges and Passenger Concerns
Flight Attendant
I'm sorry, sir, that's full. We're gonna have to gate-check those.
Dave
Are you gonna charge me 25 bucks a bag?
Flight Attendant
Of course not, sir. It's $25 for the first bag, and $40 for each additional bag.
Jeanette
I'm a little chilly, would you mind adjusting the vent?
[shivering in her seat]
Simon
But of course.
Brittany
Oh, you wrinkled my business magazine!
Simon
Heh, sorry.
Brittany
Guess I'll have to read this. She's pretty. Oh wait, that's me!
[pushes book aside revealing a magazine with herself on the cover]
Dave
All right, head count.
Theodore
BOO! You like my Jungle Monster costume? Eleanor made it for me.
[appears wearing a monster costume made out of a bag; roars until Dave removes the bag]
Eleanor
Yeah! Out of a barf bag!
Dave
Yeah, nice. Where's Alvin?
[tosses bag aside and does a head count]
Alvin
Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking: we're cleared for an on-time departure for Timbuktu. If Timbuktu is not for you, please alert the flight attendant by pressing your call button. (The passengers do so.)
[over intercom]
Dave
Alvin...
Alvin
Thank you for choosing Air Alvin, and uh... enjoy your flight!
[frantically]
Flight Attendant
Sir, please return to your seat, we're about to take off. (Alvin jumps off the food cart, accidentally pressing the release lever.)
Flight Attendant
Sit, now!
Alvin
Uh-oh.
Dave
But he--
Flight Attendant
Sit! (The cart rolls down the aisle.)
Dave
No, no, no! ALVIN!! (Alvin smiles nervously and the plane takes off, ending the film.)
[the cart crashes into Dave]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Lost Opportunities and Unexpected Apologies
Brittany
Now we'll never get to perform at the International Music Awards.
Eleanor
I guess now we're the losers.
[makes an 'L' with her fingers, putting it on top of her head, Brittany does the same]
Zoe
Jeanette... I don't know what to say. I guess I was just so obsessed with finding that treasure that I kind of... I lost it. And I'm...I'm really sorry. We both are.
[turns to Jeanette; sighs; holds up Dunlop]
Jeanette
Oh, well, apology accepted. Here... I want you to have this.
[looks at Zoe and smiles awkwardly; grabs the gold bracelet on her head that Simon (as Simone) gave her and holds it out to her]
Zoe
Really? Look, Dunlop, this is a new beginning for both of us.
[gasps; chuckles and grabs the gold bracelet and puts it on Dunlop's "head"; smiles at Jeanette]
Jeanette
I hope you don't mind. Simone... gave it to me.
[shocked but smiles awkwardly at Zoe again; not wanting to seem mean. Simon jumps off and walks up to her. Jeanette smiles nervously at him.; chuckles nervously]
Simon
Oh, n-no, I don't mind. Y-You know, Jeanette, even the most perfect gem cannot compare to your... beauty.
[barely able to make eye contact with her]
Alvin
Um, Dave?
Dave
Yes, Alvin?
Alvin
I just wanted to say, now that we're not all...you know... dead Sorry.... Sorry. Hm? Heh, Sorry I was acting like a child on the ship. And kind of maybe ruined our family vacation.
[coughs; chuckles]
Dave
Sometimes a racehorse needs a little room to run.
Alvin
Yes. Yeah. I like where your head's at. That is very wise, David.
[gives Dave a fist bump]
Ian
Sup? What, no love for Uncle Ian?
[holds out fist for a fist bump also but no one gives him one]
Brittany and Eleanor
You put us in cages!
Ian
Seriously? Are we still talking about that?! New subject: I saved Dave's life!
Theodore
Okay, but I'll be watching you, mister!
[looks at Ian through the spyglass]
Dave
Alvin, you still have that pocketknife I gave you?
[looks up at the sky, then back at Alvin]
Alvin
Knife? Oh, right! Sorry, I meant to give it back.
[chuckles; pulls it out of his jacket]
Dave
I want you to keep it.
Alvin
Really?
Dave
Maybe you can use it to signal that helicopter.
[points to the sky]
Ian
What? Hey!
[jumps up]
Eleanor
Hey!
Brittany
We're down here!
Dave
Hello!
Ian
It's me, Ian Hawke! Jett Records!
Ian
Guys, circle around!
Rescue crew guy in the Helicopter
Everything's okay! We got you, guys!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Balancing Fun and Safety on the Ship
Dave
Captain, I'm really sorry about what happened. Alvin, he's a kid. He's just trying to have some fun.
Captain Correlli
There's nothing wrong with fun. Our pelican makes sure that everybody on the ship has fun. In fact, in port, he circles the ship on a hang glider. It's really quite amusing. However, my number one priority is the passengers safety, so I simply cannot have Alvin put himself, or anyone else, at risk again.
Dave
Believe me, I understand.
Captain Correlli
If Alvin breaks any more of our rules, there will be consequences.
Dave
The last thing we want is anybody getting hurt.
Pelican Mascot
Excuse me.
[bumps into a waiter, causing him to spill steaming hot gravy on Dave's lap.]
Dave
Hot!
[gasps]
Waiter
Sorry.
Dave
Hot! Unbelievable. Gravy pants.
[heads outside and wipes himself off]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Tense Moment Among Friends
Alvin
Zoe!
Zoe
No, no. Not another step! Don't come any closer!
[holds the rope that's holding Jeanette]
Dave
Are you all right, Jeanette?
Jeanette
I'm pretty freaked out, and those earrings tasted awful! Blegh!
[spits out all the treasure from her mouth]
Alvin
Zoe, you don't have to do this!
Zoe
Oh, I don't? I spent ten years looking for this treasure. It's the whole reason why I came to this stinking island!
Alvin
You mean... you mean you didn't crash-land?
Zoe
They said that I was crazy and they said that this map was a fake! And now the treasure…is MINE!
[pulls out map]
Alvin
RUN!
Dave
Jeanette, come on! Come on! Run!
Zoe
No, you don't!
Alvin
Jeanette!
[looks back]
Jeanette
Oh, no, help!
[panicking]
Zoe
You're going back in that cave, and you are going to get me more treasure!
[pulling the rope to drag Jeanette to her]
Simon
JEANETTE!
Jeanette
Simone!
Simon
It's Simon!
[adjusting his glasses]
Dave
ALVIIIIIN!
Alvin
Hurry!
[turns to look at Dave, who throws him the aforementioned pocketknife. He jumps after it, catches it with one paw, flips it open and cuts the rope, causing Zoe to fall on her back.]
Dave
Come on, guys, go! Go, go! Come on, come on.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Dance Invitation Between Friends
Theodore
Um, Eleanor, would you care to dance?
Eleanor
I'd love to.
[sees Theodore and smiles at him]
Theodore
With me?
Eleanor
Yes, Theodore!
[throws her crutches; grabs onto Theodore's paws and starts dancing with him]
Brittany
I can't believe Jeanette's getting all the attention. I'm the pretty one. Jeanette's the smart one. You don't see me running around trying to be all smart, do you?
Alvin
I know. I'm the fun one. You're the pretty one!
Brittany
Yeah!
Alvin
Do you know how slippery that dirt is? This is ridiculous. Are you even listening to me? SIMON!
Brittany
Uh, Alvin? You're starting to sound like Dave.
Alvin
NO!!!!!
[shocked, eyes widen]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Hollywood Dreams and Bidding Wars
Ian
It's good to be back, huh?
Dave
Sure is.
Ian
Sold Zoe's story to Hollywood. Huge bidding war. Keira Knightley is interested. I'm thinking 50 Cent for me.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Squeaky Holiday Adventure Awaits
Taglines
This holiday, it's going to get squeaky.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Rocking the Boat Adventure
Taglines
They're going to rock the boat!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Moment of Sacrifice and Friendship
Dave
Let go!
Simone
I've been hit!
[falls dramatically]
Theodore
By Dave's necklace?
[tugs the necklace with his paws.]
Simone
Tell Jeanette I will watch over her... with angel wings.
[plays dead]
Theodore
Dave?
[picks up the candy necklace. Dave rolls onto his belly, and the two of them make eye contact; their mouths gradually curl into smiles]
Dave
Ha-ha, Theodore!
[picks up Theodore, overjoyed; Theodore hugs his shoulder]
Simone
Dave? Ha ha! Told you we'd find him!
[climbs a tree]
Dave
Simon!
Simone
It is Simone, but I am often confused for this Simon fellow. Perhaps we look alike?
[leans on the tree's branch]
Dave
Simone?
[confused]
Theodore
Ian!
[sees Ian comes out of the bush]
Ian
Hey, you found the chubby one.
Dave
Don't worry, Theodore. Nothing's gonna happen to you. Is it?
Theodore
What was that?!
[whimpers]
Ian
Uh, that's an active volcano.
Alvin
Okay, Brittany and I will build the deck. Eleanor, you need to start braiding ropes. Jeanette, find as many coconuts and mangoes as you can. Who knows how long we'll be out there.
Dave
What can I do to help?
[walks up behind them]
The Chipettes
Dave!
The Chipettes
You found us! Yay!
Brittany
We missed you so much!
Jeanette
I knew you would find us!
Dave
Eleanor! What happened?
Eleanor
Oh, nothing... just a little... zip-line accident.
Dave
A what?!
Eleanor
I'm fine. It only hurts when I try to explain it.
[picks up the crutch, smiling at Dave awkwardly]
Dave
Okay, you know what? Never mind. The important thing is you guys are safe. Alvin? Everything's gonna be okay. Hey, what is it?
[looks up to see Alvin, who, not looking too happy, can barely look at him. He drops Brittany and Jeanette down carefully and walks over to the barrel that Alvin is standing on.]
Alvin
I thought you'd never find us... that you weren't even looking...
[on the verge of tears]
Dave
Why wouldn't I look for you?
[confused]
Alvin
Because I'm such a pain in the...
Dave
Alvin.
[interrupting him, reassuringly]
Alvin
I know, you don't think I'm a pain.
Dave
No, you're a pain. But I'd come, no matter what.
The Chipettes
*sigh with happiness*
Simone
Arc de Triomphe, mayonnaise, Napoleon...
Ian
Ugh. I get it, Frenchie; you come from a rich history. Well, guess what? We're ALL gonna be history if we don't get out of here.
The Chipettes
Uncle Ian?!
[terrified]
Alvin
What's he doing here?
Dave
It's kind of a long story.
Theodore
Don't worry, he's cool.
Simone
Yes, for a pelican man.
Alvin
Oh yeah, nothing cooler than a grown man in a pelican suit.
Alvin
So, Dave, how are we gonna get out of here?
Dave
I don't know, Alvin, I think you've got this under control.
Alvin
Theodore, you and Eleanor are on rope duty. Dave and Ian, we need oars. Simone, you and Jeanette are in charge of food. And, Zoe...
[smiles]
Zoe
No, I know, I know. I'm gonna go and I'm gonna pack up my balls!
[walks away]
Dave
Who's that?
Alvin
Another long story.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Questioning the Source of a Bracelet
Brittany
Simon, I need to know where you found that gold bracelet.
Simon
What-wh-what gold bracelet?
Brittany
The one you gave to Jeanette.
Simon
What? Where do I gave Jeanette a bracelet?
[shocked]
Brittany
On your date.
Simon
Jeanette and I are DATING?!
[gasps; panicked]
Brittany
Okay, he's useless.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unspoken Desires Between Characters
Jeanette
W-what are you doing?
[Simone grabs her hand]
Simone
What I've wanted to do since the moment I laid my eyes all over on you.
[starts dancing with Jeanette]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unexpected Shuffleboard Activity Surprises Chipmunks
Dave
You're all lucky Captain Correlli has allowed you one more activity.
Alvin
Is it hang gliding, wakeboarding or bungee jumping?
Dave
Nope. Shuffleboard.
[shows them a section of the deck marked with a shuffleboard playing surface]
Chipmunks/Chipettes
AWW!
Alvin
Man!
Simon
By my calculations, it appears to be 10% shuffle, 90% board.
Jeanette
That's funny.
[giggles]
Simon
Oh, uh, Th-th-thanks. You really think so?
Alvin
You know, Dave, I think I'd prefer the plank.
Dave
Sorry, Alvin, but this is what you get to do. And I get to do something I haven't done in a loooong time: absolutely nothing.
[sits on a lounge chair and pulls out a magazine.]
Alvin
Brittany approaches her puck, adjusts her stance... looks over at me, quite annoyed, wonders to herself if I'm ever going to shut my mouth... Realizes I'm not and makes her move...
[commentating]
Alvin
And... OH! Oh, it's short! A costly error, ladies and gentlemen! That's going to haunt her for the rest of her career!
[cackles]
Brittany
You can make all the jokes you want, Alvin, but not even you can make this interesting.
[laughs mockingly]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Tension Among Friends on a Deserted Island
Alvin
We're alive! We're alive!
Brittany
Good, cause now I'm going to kill you!
Simon
Guys! Guys! Guys! Nobody is killing anybody okay? (Angrily Grits his teeth) No matter how much he deserves it.
Alvin
Thank you Si, Though I could've done without the passive aggression. (clears throat) Look, we've got nothing to worry about. Dave knows we're gone by now. He probably has the whole coast guard looking for us. Meantime, why don't we all just relax and have some donut?
Theodore
Did you guys want some? (All groan)
Theodore
Simon. Where are you going?
Simon
Who is this Simon you speak of?
[in French accent]
Theodore
You?
Simon
No, my name is not Simon. It is... Simone!
Theodore
That's pretty close to Simon.
Simone
And yet completely different. Would you care to join me on my adventure?
Theodore
What adventure?
Simone
The adventure called life!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Setting Boundaries in Fun and Responsibility
Dave
ALVIN!!!
[screams as the crowd covers their ears]
Dave
We talked about setting rules, Alvin.
Alvin
I'm sorry. I didn't know the agreement meant no fun!
Dave
You're allowed to have fun. When are you going to stop acting like a child?
Alvin
When are YOU going to stop treating me like a child?
Dave
I'll stop treating you like a child when you start acting like a grown-up.
Alvin
I'll start acting like a grown-up when you start--
Dave
Hey, girls, not now, please. Okay?
Chipettes
Aww.
Alvin
Lame.
Simon
Sorry, Dave.
Dave
I need to get ready for dinner with the captain.
Brittany
We're having dinner with the captain?
[gasps]
Dave
No, I am. You're staying here. I have to go apologize for everything Alvin did.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Disobedience in a Dangerous Situation
Alvin
Dave. I'm coming with you.
Dave
Absolutely not, it's too dangerous.
[looks at Alvin]
Alvin
Remember I said someday I may need to disobey you? Sorry, Dave, but I gotta disobey you.
Dave
Let's go.
[resignedly]
Zoe
You're not coming up until you have every last bit of that treasure!
[puts her close to the hole so she can fit in]
Jeanette
B-B-But the volcano's about to explode!
[stammering]
Zoe
Well, then I guess you better hurry, huh?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Betting Misunderstanding Among Friends
Simon
Alvin! Alvin!
Dave
Simon?
Simon
I wasn't betting. Honest.
[looks at Dave]
Guy in Suit
Your winnings, sir.
Better
Oh, busted!
Simon
I didn't sneak out. I mean, I did, but only to stop Alvin.
Dave
Right.
Ian
There they are, Captain.
Dave
Captain.
Alvin
Oh, what's he going to do? Make us walk the plank?
Theodore
There's a plank?
[gasps]
Dave
No, there's no plank. But if you guys disobey me one more time, you will be off the ship. And you'll miss the International Music Awards. Do you understand?
Eleanor
Yes, Dave.
Jeanette
Uh-huh.
Brittany
Absolutely.
Alvin
What if we need to disobey you?
Dave
And why would you need to do that?
Alvin
Well, let's say that you tell me to stay put. "Alvin, if you move from that chair, you're grounded!" But then, I happen to see pirates climbing up ropes, ever so stealthy, from the side of the ship. Now, it would be easy for me to take my trusty old Swiss Army knife and cut the ropes. But I have to stay put. Or do I?
Dave
Yes, Alvin, you do. And what are you doing with a pocket knife?
Alvin
What pocket knife are you referring to?
Dave
Come on, give it to me. You could cut yourself.
Alvin
So, I could have saved the whole ship from robbage and pilgering and you'd still ground me?
[hands it over]
Simon
Alvin, there's no such word as robbage. And it's pillaging. But he does have a point, Dave. There's got to be times when you trust us to take matters into your own hands.
[puts his paw on Alvin's shoulder.]
Dave
I trusted you tonight and look where that got me!
[sighs]
Alvin
That's probably just the hot gravy talking.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.