Black Dynamite Quotes

Black Dynamite Shh, mama, you gonna wake up the rest of the bitches.

Black Dynamite You can hit the sheets or the streets, it don’t make me no nevermind. Now that’s your bag, baby. You can go or you can come, can you dig it?

Black Dynamite Three inches to the left and they would have missed my black ass.

Black Dynamite Now that the man has our backs to the wall, I ain’t gonna let em hurt the kids.

Black Dynamite (firing missiles at an island from a helicopter) Take that, you dick-shrinkin island!

Bullhorn Oh, you's a corn-fed fool with a lot of muscle mass. But it's time for Bullhorn to get up in that ass!

Black Dynamite I know I was the best CIA agent the CIA ever had, but I thought I told you honkies from the CIA that Black Dynamite was out of the game!

Bullhorn You know he came around here about a week ago, with some cats that I had never seen before. Man I mean these cats looked mean! Meaner than two fat motherfuckers wrestling over pork chops and greens, can you dig it?

Black Dynamite (throws eyeballs at Fiendish Dr. Wu) You told him to keep an eye out for me.

Black Dynamite Tiny, get pimpin’ Jake out of my trunk, tell him, “the rest of my money by Wednesday or I’ll make him stick himself.”

Black Dynamite I’d like to take the credit but dig mama, there’s no “I” in “revolut” …in “team.”

Black Dynamite It may be bigger than you and it may be bigger than me, but it’s not bigger than you AND me; can you dig it?

Black Dynamite You diabolical dick shrinkin motherfuckers!

Black Dynamite Mama, you can bet yo sweet ass and half a titty whoever ordered the hit on you has already got the pigs in they back pocket.

Black Dynamite Excuse me, brothers.

Militant (Reading both his stage directions (what he is supposed to do) and dialogue (what he is supposed to say) at the same time): The Militants turn, startled! This is private. How'd you get in here?

Black Dynamite I walked in.

Militant So, you one of them sneaky brothers, huh? Or maybe you're an undercover pig. Or maybe you're just a federal hitman.

Black Dynamite If I was, you cats would already be dead. Now, let me speak to the man in charge.

Militant (still reading both) Sarcastically, I'm in charge.

Black Dynamite Haha! I threw that shit before I walked in the room!

Black Dynamite The worst thing about these dealers getting children addicted to this new smack, is that these children are ORPHANS…. And orphans don’t have parents.

Bullhorn Let everybody know and suckers be warned that this is the outcome when you mess with Bullhorn!

Gloria So you’re one of those Tom Slick brothers that think they can get by on good looks, a wink and a smile, huh?

Black Dynamite Tom Slick – no. But thank you for the compliment.

Black Dynamite Winks and smiles?

Gloria Yeah

Gloria Well what about the smile?

Black Dynamite I shoulda known you'd be behind this, Fiendish Dr. Wu. Your knowledge of scientific biological transmogrifications is only outmatched by your zest for Kung Fu treachery!

Bullhorn Man, them honkeys gonna be runnin for cover! when us brothas get—ge-- get-- (struggles to make a rhyme for "cover", then gives up) Hmm.

Black Dynamite (after Bullhorn is killed) Fiendish Dr. Wu, you done fucked up now!!

Black Dynamite (after killing a donut costume-wearing assassin) Donuts don’t wear alligator shoes.

O'Leary I’ve already taken the liberty of re-issuing your license to kill.

Gloria I hope you don’t think that means you can have some of this cookie because if I offered you some of this cookie, this cookie might kill you.

Honeybee Black Dynamite, I want to thank you for taking care of us when we was down and out, and didn't have no pimp.

Honeybee They replaced the chain on your nunchucks, and oiled the bearings.

Captain Yancy My God, men. Do you know what this means? Do you know whose brother... ? This ghetto is gonna be turned upside-down, I tell you, upside-down. The streets are gonna run crimson with the blood of the men responsible for his brother's death. Man I'm speaking of is a veritable one-man army. And if you get on his bad side, brother, you're done for. It's only a matter of time before he finds out. And when he does, no matter where he is, get ready, gentlemen, because hell's a-coming. Coming, coming, coming...

Rafelli That black son of a bitch! He killed my best dealer! I want Black Dynamite dead, and I want him dead now!

Creamed Corn Stick with me, baby, I'll have you fartin through silk.

Bullhorn Go get Chicago Wind before he disappears. I'll take care of this gorilla eatin goon here!

Honey Bee Black Dynamite, you ain't got to worry about Gloria. She gonna be safe in here. I been keeping the girls up on their kung fu like you told me to. Now, they find her up in here, we will fricassee they honky asses.

Gloria Dynamite, are you sure about this? Maybe we should call the police.

Black Dynamite No, Mama. You can bet your sweet ass and half a titty whoever put that hit on you already got the cops in their back pocket. You be cool, Mama. Bee here will keep you tight and out of sight. I'm gonna shake the tree from the roots and rake up the fruits, rip it up out of the ground, find out what's going down. Don't worry about tomorrow, Mama, because tonight-

Euphoria Dynamite’s gonna make it all right!

Black Dynamite Euphoria, shut the fuck up! I know that was you! I ain't even gotta look! I should send your ass back to Crenshaw Pete with his hot-ass coat hangers, bitch! Would you like that?!

Gloria Black Dynamite, I know that we just met, but somehow I feel that I can trust you. I'll be waiting here till you come to get me. Thank you for saving my life.

Black Dynamite You be cool, Little Mama. I'll be back before too long.

Black Dynamite Do you see where I'm coming from you jive motherfucker!

Black Dynamite Listen sucka. I’m blacker than the ace of spades and more militant than you and your whole damned army put together. And while you’re out there chanting at rallies and brow beating politicians, I’m taking out any money frontin’ sucker on a humble that gets in my way, so I'll tell you what. When your so-called Revolution starts, you call me and I'll be right down in front showing you how it's done. But until then, you need to SHUT THE FUCK UP when grown folks is talkin!

Black Dynamite Freeze, Turkeys!

O'Leary I see you haven't lost your tough, B.D.

Black Dynamite O'Leary? (uncocks handgun)

O'Leary The old pie in the windowsill trick. I can't believe I fell for that. That was the same trick you used in Nam to save my ass. B.D. took our fatigues and put them on two dead gooks. I remember we circled back and turned the tables.

Black Dynamite I guess you forgot about the time you and Bravo company left my black ass for dead, huh? But I remember. I remember everything. I remember Vietnam like it was yesterday. I remember that village in Tainan that we cut down. It was a massacre. All the dead Chinamen we left in our tracks. I remember the faces, the children. This one child I'll never forget. Poor little bastard was still alive. His little Chinese legs were blown clean off! Still see his little shins & feet hanging from the ceiling fan across the hut. He was charred from his head down to his little Chinese knees. He tried to get up, but he fell over when what was left of his right leg broke off. As he laid there, flat on his face, he looked up at me. His little Chinese eyes burned right into my stomach, deep into my soul. He said something to me in Chinese like, Boo coo sow!', sounded like some cartoon shit. But I understood it to be a question that he was asking me. And I don't have to know how to speak Chinese to know what that question was. Why, Black Dynamite? Why?

O'Leary We're a long way from Nam. Look at this place. It must have an eight-track player in every room. What's going on today is a smack problem of epic proportion. Corruption is running rampant and we don't know who to trust. We need you, Black Dynamite, now more than ever.

Black Dynamite I know I was the best CIA agent that the CIA ever had, but I thought I told you honkies from the CIA that Black Dynamite was out of the game.

O'Leary You're never out of the game.

Black Dynamite I've known you for a long time. And there's something you're not telling me.

O'Leary Okay. We heard about your brother's death. The last thing we need is you running through the streets creating a river of blood.

Black Dynamite Tell me who did it and I'll just leave a puddle.

O'Leary We don't know who killed Jimmy. But I do know this. You step out of line, friendship or not, and I'm gonna take you down. Because in case you forgot, when you left the agency, you relinquished your license to kill.

Black Dynamite Well, you do what you have to. Just don't get in my way.

Black Dynamite Who the hell’s interrupting my Kung Fu?!

Black Dynamite All right. What's wrong, Honey Bee? I've known you too long. Now, if something's bothering you, why don't you lay it on me?

Honey Bee Black Dynamite, I got to go to the hospital. It's my little nephew Bucky. He OD'd.

Black Dynamite Where is Bucky and what has he had?

Honey Bee It's that new drug on the street. All the kids are falling prey to it. What we gonna do, Black Dynamite?

Black Dynamite I know what I'm gonna do. (slaps his desk and stands up) I'm gonna fight. The only way I know how. Ever since I was a boy, all I knew was how to fight. Fight, fight, fight. And when I got tired, I would fight some more. And now that the Man has got our backs to the wall, I ain't gonna let him hurt the kids. I'm gonna take him down. I'm gonna take them all down.