D2: The Mighty Ducks (1994) - Quotes

Taglines: The puck stops here! The Mighty Ducks are back.

Wolf "The Dentist" Stansson: Gunnar, you lost it for me.

Gunnar Stahl: You lost it for yourself.

Dwayne: Where I come from, we treat ladies with respect!

Connie: Thank you, Dwayne, but I'm no lady. I'm a DUCK!

Averman: [about Team Iceland] We can't make it. Iceland's bigger, stronger, faster, they got more facial hair.

Gordon: This isn't a hockey game. It's a circus.

Russ: [laughs] Hey, Goldberg! I bet if that puck was a cheeseburger, you'd stop it!

Averman: [to Gordon] Nice haircut. What, ya lose a bet?

Dwayne: This is more crowded than a truckload of goats.

Julie: Somebody better watch their hands.

Averman: Yecch. Somebody licked me!

Fulton: Ugh, I smell something.

Entire team: GOLDBERG!

Goldberg: It wasn't me!

Portman: No, it was me!

Gordon: I can't think of any fashion to make it clearer. You are a team. To win this thing, we're going to need to work as one. Now, as ONE–––skate!

Gordon: Everyone goes their own way, everyone falls down. Now get up and do it again!

Gordon: [Then he promises double dessert to the last player left standing] Alright, Rancher Dwayne. Go round me up some stray calf.

Tibbles: I know you athletes need your food, but let me interrupt you for a moment. Winning the Junior Goodwill Games is more than just a victory. It's a chance to be immortalized in a time-honored tradition.

Dwayne: Hey, that's us!

Tibbles: Today it's a cereal box. Tomorrow it's video games, action figures, lunch boxes. Perhaps they'll even make a movie about you. Stranger facts have happened. Now, just where everybody knows who you are, put away these old Duck jerseys because from now on you'll be wearing these!

Charlie: This stuff has Hendrix written all over it.

Gordon: They're our sponsors, Charlie.

Charlie: Then what? Why can't we be USA Ducks or at least keep our Duck colors?

Gordon: [The fact is, he explains, they aren't the Ducks anymore. They are a new team. Team USA] Charlie, it's business stuff.

Gordon: [Sees Portman for the first time] That guy's a teenager?

Portman: [Skating along, singing to music on his headphones, knocking Ducks players over as he does so] Don't you know that everything's on FIRE?

Tibbles: Uh, yeah, hormones.

Gordon: He's a goon!

Portman: [Knocks another player over and puts his arm around Dwayne; Dwayne shakes his head, Portman continues on; pushes another player over and tosses his stick to Julie] C'mon, Tex, sing it with me! "Everything's..." Here you go, sweetie!

Gordon: My kids don't play that kind of hockey.

Tibbles: I believe they're called "enforcers", Gordon. And when you play Iceland, you're gonna need him.

Dwayne: Yee-haw! How's everybody? Y'all ready to play some puck?

Jesse: [rest of the Ducks laugh] Hey, look, it's Hop-Along Gretzky!

Tibbles: That's Dwayne Robertson, from Austin. He's the best puck handler I've ever seen.

Gordon: You mean, for his age.

Tibbles: No, I don't.

Gordon: Haven't you guys been training in the off-season?

Averman: You know, I knew we forgot something.

Jan: For breakfast, my specialty: Jan's has-

Gordon and Charlie: -enpfeffer and eggs.

Jan: Ja.

Gordon: Thought I'd smelled something burning.

Jan: [referring to Charlie] I see you've met my new apprentice.

Charlie: Jan told me you did this job when you were my age.

Gordon: That's right, and I hope he pays you more than he paid me.

Charlie: You got paid?

Jan: [quickly] Eat everybody, before the hasenpfeffer gets cold.

Gordon: [to Jan] Hans couldn't make it?

Jan: Now don't get me started with that strudel-head. He went back to the old country for the summer, left me to run the shop all by myself. He wanted to see our mother. She loved him more, you know.