Despicable Me 3 (2017) - Quotes

Bratt: [laughing; on speaker] Hello, Hollywood! I'm back and bigger than ever.

Bratt: [takes the Lucy's head disguise off him; laughs while the girls gasp; chuckles; Clive laughs] We're going to Hollywood! Now, that’s what I call acting. Let's go, Clive! We've got a giant robot waiting!

Gru: [opens the closet door and gasps; finds the real Lucy bound and gagged in the closet then removes the gag from her mouth] Huh? Lucy? But...

Lucy: [gasps for air] Bratt! He took the girls!

Gru: What?! No!

Gru: Dru! Dru!

Dru: [turns away from him] Go away! I don't wanna talk to you.

Gru: (No, listen.) Bratt has the girls!

Gru: Listen, brother, about what I just said...

Dru: No, I'm the one.

Gru: [sighs] I shouldn't have... I'm sorry.

Dru: Oh, I'm so sorry, Gru.

Lucy: Aw... Ooh, look out!

Gru: [sees a flying machine] What is that?

Lucy: [gasps as she finds Niko standing behind his mother, a woman, holding Niko's brother, a baby] Ugh, here we go. Niko...

Niko's mother: You! You refuse my son's engagement pig?!

Lucy: What?

Niko's mother: [spits at Margo, and the baby does the same, much to her shock as she hides behind Lucy] May you and your daughter die a slow death and be buried with onions!

Lucy: [Margo is surprised by how Lucy is defending her] Alright, lady, that's it! Nobody, nobody curses my daughter! You got that? Because if you mess with Margo, you mess with me! And I promise you do not want to mess with me! Do you understand me?!

Niko's mother: Yes, yes.

Lucy: [calmly; angrily; Niko's mother takes her son's hand, and they hurry off. Lucy then turns to Margo, thinking she's still upset with her; Margo hugs her tightly. Lucy is startled at first, but hugs her, too] Good. Now, get out! Look, Margo, I think we just need to--

Lucy: [sees Niko] Hello? Oh, hi.

Niko: Hello, mother of Margo. I am Niko. I present you with pig to confirm my engagement to your daughter.

Lucy: [laughs] Hey, what now?

Margo: What's going on? Go on.

Lucy: Uh, remember Little Boots?

Niko: [tries to kiss Margo] Hello, my schmoopsie-poo.

Margo: Whoa! Hey!

Lucy: [laughs] He seems to think you're engaged.

Margo: [as Niko kisses her hand] What? We're not engaged.

Margo: Um...

Lucy: What?

Margo: It's OK to tell them "No" sometimes, too, you know? Moms need to be tough.

Lucy: [imitates a pirate captain] Right. Tough. I can totally do that! Still figuring out this mom thing. Getting my sea legs, matey.

Lucy: So... what did you guys do today?

Gru and Dru: [lying] Nothing!

Scar-Faced Man: [On 'eye', he bends down toward Agnes' face] I'm telling you I saw one once. With my own eye!

Agnes: [waving her arms to halt the man; gasps; shocks and rages] Wait, wait, wait. You saw a for-real live unicorn?! What did it look like? What do you think? Did you pet it? Did it smell like candy? Was it FLUFYYYYYY?!

Scar-Faced Man: It was so fluffy; I thought I was gonna die!

Dru: So, brother, how are things going for you career-wise?

Gru: [laughs nervously] Great. So, so great. Crushing it.

Gru: [wailing] YAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH, THIS PIG HAS ISSUES!!!!!

Fritz: Please, come on in.

Gru: [screaming] Whoa-a, AAAAAAAAH!!

Lucy: Oh, this is so amazing. It's like the Sistine Chappell! But with pigs.

Dru: Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo, heh-heh-heh-heh, ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaa! MY BROTHEEEEEEER!!!!!!

Both: My brother!

Dru: Gru!

Gru: Dru!

Dru: [notices Lucy and dances with her] (he laughing and he takes off his hat and shown his blonde hair that Gru is uncomfortable) Eh… You must be the beautiful wife!

Lucy: [Dru twirls her around and catches her; laughs; tugs Dru's scarf] Beautiful? Oh! Stop it! Sweet talker.

Dru: [wraps his arm around Gru, with the other still holding Lucy; rubs Gru's head] How is my brother finding a wife like you when he is so bald? I'm joking!

Gru: Wait, what, it's true?! You never told me I had a brother, and you told me that Dad died of disappointment when I was born!

Marlena: Yeah. That was the agreement.

Gru: Agreement"? What are you talking about?!

Marlena: [sighs] Shortly after you and your brother were born, your father and I divorced. We each took one son to raise on our own and promised never to see each other again. Obviously, I got second pick.

Gru: I have a brother.

Gru: [runs over to Agnes after she sells the fluffy unicorn] Agnes, what are you doing? You sold your unicorn?

Agnes: Well, I just wanted to help since you don't have a job. I got 2 whole dollars for it!

Dave and Jerry: Aww...

Museum Director: [kisses Pompeux's cheeks] Monsieur Pompeux! So, what do we owe the presence of the world's foremost gem expert?

Pompeux: [The museum director and his friends gasp. Pompeux enters a room where the Dumont Diamond sits on a pedestal surrounded by lasers. Pompeux snaps his fingers causing the lasers to turn off, examines the diamond with a jeweler's loop, sniffs it with his nose, then licks it with his tongue] The chief of police sent me. He was censored that during the recent heist attempt, the Dumont Diamond was replaced with a phony. Ooh-la-la! You have been duped!

Museum Director: What? We have?

Pompeux: [in Bratt's voice] Yes. BY ME!

Museum Director: [A rubber mask of Pompeux's head gets tossed into the museum director's face. He removes it, then gasps; As he runs, a sixth dart strikes his butt, and he collapses on the floor. The costume of Pomepeux's body starts to shake as Bratt gets out of it.] What? What is…? Oh, no! Help!

Bratt: [speaks French, then laughs as he escapes] I've been a bad boy! Or should I say…

Officer: [while watching the minions run by] What are you doing? Intruders! Intruders!

Officer 1: There they are!

Officer 2: Stop!

Officer 1: Hey, you! Don’t move! Halt!

Officer 1: [while Officer 2 is panting] Call for backup!

Gru: Guys! Shh, shh, shh, shh! I don't think you heard me right! No, no, no, no, no, no! This does not mean that we're going back to being villains!

Minions: [disappointed] Awww...

Stuart: Ah? Pinyoof la komiko!

Gru: [[The Empire Strikes Back|freezing himself in carbonite] Okay, alright, I get it. Look, I know it's been a little tough lately, especially with Dr. Nefario accidentally ].

Gru: But our life of crime is over! Ugh. Mel! Mel, you're with me on this, right?

Mel: Ugh! Looka!

Mel: [the Minions all rouse up] MINIONS, NO LE PINYOOF! Pinyoof, pinyoof, pinyoof!

Gru: Guys, listen to me! Read my lips! Leso me lipo! Pomo doro la comquit!

Gru: [pulls out a Minions language book] What? What did I say? It's not "comquit"? Ah, okay. Pomo doro la kumquat!

Mel: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Pulisso kumquit parado. Lury para yo.

Gru: Don't take that tone with me! We're not going back to villainy!

Mel: Uh? No pirany?

Gru: [the Minions all blow raspberries at Gru] Yes! And I don't want to hear another word about it! Look! If you guys don't stop right now, there will be consequences!

Mel: Eh? Poro es me moro!

Gru: Hey, don't say anything you're going to regret!

Mel: [he and the other Minions leave] Ooh, no re paros! El es quita! Choperu!

Gru: [Bob angrily stomps on Mel's Gru hat and leaves with all the Minions... except for Dave and Jerry, who just walked into the room, unaware of what just happened] What, you quit? You're serious? Come on! Dave! Jerry! Good news, guys! You've just been promoted! You're in charge now! Huh? Not bad!

Dave and Jerry: [whoop excitingly as they tear off their Hawaiian costumes and begin rubbing their butts together] ROOBA, ROOBA, ROOBA, ROOBA!

Gru: Oh... GEESH!

Silas: Thank you for coming in such short notice. It is with great sadness that I must inform that as of today, I am retiring as head of the AVL.

Lucy: Oh, no!

Silas: [under his breath] Your new leader is coming directly from head office, effective immediately. She is the very gifted. The very ambitious, Miss Valerie da Vinci. As I look out over all your faces, I am fluttered with so many memories.

Valerie da Vinci: Oh, boy, this is a snooze fest! Blah, blah, blah, we understand, you're old, look, you're fat, you're done.

Silas: [grunts; gets shoved into the ejection hole] Ooh! Let me breathe in!

Valerie: [chuckles; clears her throat] Whew, broke a little sweat there. First order of business. WHICH ONE OF YOU LOSERS IS AGENT GRU?!

Bratt: Gru, did you actually think I was unconscious?

Gru: What?

Bratt: It's called acting, hoser. And clearly, I've still got it!

Gru: [''screaming''] OH! OW! AAH! OOH-AAAH! WHOA! WAAAAH, WHOAAAAA! Oh-ha-ha-ha-ho-ho! WAAAAA, WHOA, Oh! Ow! Aah!

Gru: [''wailing''] AH-HO, HO-HO-HO, HOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Brat: I'VE BEEN A BA-A-AD BOY! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Alpha Team Leader: Freeze! Don't move!

Bratt: Son of a Beta-max!

Bratt: Hello, Gru! How's your transition coming? You know, from world's worst villain to world's worst (heroic) agent?

Gru: Oh, that's hilarious, you should be on TV.

Gru: [pulls out his freeze ray] Oh, that's right. You were! But then you got cancelled!

Gru: [smacks the gun away; pulls out... a small water pistol; throws the water pistol at Bratt's face] What about that? What? Ugh! Girls!

A.V.L. Tech: Sir, the ship has been boarded by some kinda of... monster!

Silas Ramsbottom: [zooms in on the boat, revealing Bratt] Wait, that’s not a monster. That's a man wearing shoulder pads! There's only one supervillain whose fashion sense is quite that dated, Balthazar Bratt. Blast it, the Dumont Diamond is on that ship! I want every agent in the area on the scene immediately!

Lucy: We're already here! Agents Grucy are closing fast!

Gru: Yeah! Wait. What? What did you call us?

Lucy: Grucy! You know, Gru and Lucy mushed together. Try it.

Gru: Oh, I like it, but not a lot. I don't like it.

TV Show Host: The year was 1985, and the #1 hit show on TV was…

Young Balthazar Bratt: Evil Bratt!

TV Show Host: The show starred young Balthazar Bratt as a child, prodigy and criminal mastermind bent on world domination!

Military Officer: There he is! Get him!

Young Bratt: I've been a bad boy!

TV Show Host: Bratt was the biggest child actor of the 1980s, striking a chord with audiences all over the world.

Military Officer: There he is! Get him!

TV Show Host: [as Bratt kicks the military officials] But it all came to an end in Season 3, when…

Teenage Balthazar Bratt: [[The Brady Bunch] (imitating Peter Brady from ]) I've been a bad boy!

TV Show Host: The young star experienced an unexpected growth spurt.

Teenage Bratt: Boy? Boy?! AGGGGHHH!

TV Show Host: [[w:Hollywood, Los Angeles|Hollywood] The show was canceled. ] rejected him, and Bratt quickly plunged into a downward spiral, starting to actually believe he was the character he played on TV.

Teen Bratt: What are you looking at?!

TV Show Host: Leading us all to wonder… where is he now?

Bratt: You know what, Clive? Playing a villain on TV was fun, but being one in real life is even better! Heist music!

Clive: Here it comes!

Bratt: D'oh! What?! Clive, what are you doing?! How is that heist music?!

Clive: Sorry! My bad.

Bratt: [laughs evilly] Well, now that I have got the diamond, it's payback time. Oh, it is too bad Gru will not be around to try and stop me. Oh, wait! No, it is not! I hate that tweeb! And you, Hollywood! This time, I am canceling you! And all the losers who rejected me!

Bratt: Go get them, Bratt Pack!

Bratt: Gru? There’s two of you now?

Bratt: Gum one, gum all!

Bratt: This is not over, Gru! You hear me? This is not over!

Bratt: [repeated line] I have been a bad boy!

Dru: ['''Gru''': Ugh, I miss the minions.] Hehe, I’m okay.

Dru: ["hugging" Gru while jumping up and down; lightly punches Gru all over as Gru tries to stop him; does an impression of Gru is face] Oh, I love this guy! Look at him! But hair would make you better. Look at his face! Oh, he is so mad!

Dru: Face it, Gru. Villainy is in your blood!

Gru: Get ready, Bratt! You are about to be blasted back to the 80s!

Gru: Take it to the AVL and get out jobs back!

Gru: There is always a blind guy.