Creative Title Ideas for Viral Videos
Leo:
If you put "cue kitten" in the title of your YouTube video, you're going to get 1,000,000 hits. And then I link that to my website and you can see my stand-up on my website. It's genius.
Ira: [[Megan Fox]
Why don't you call it, like, "] Blows Someone"? And then more people would Google that.
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Standup Comedy Boundaries and Creativity
Laura:
No cussing in your standup.
George:
That takes out half of my act.
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Confronting Uncomfortable Situations in Comedy
Mark:
Don't put me in this position where I have to fuck my way out of a corner!
Leo:
He'll do it too. I've seen him.
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Free Pass Lists and Unexpected Revelations
Clarke: [[Cameron Diaz; laughs, then looks at Laura]
So, you're going to kill ], eh? That girl is a menace to society, isn't she? Fuck her! What? She's on my free pass list. Who's on yours?
Laura:
George.
Clarke: [points at George]
This George?
George:
Look out.
Laura:
Yeah.
Clarke:
Oh, well. Then I just want Cameron dead. Over her dead body.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Heaven and Hell Perspectives on Death
Mark:
When my grandfather died, there was one candle next to his bed. And the candle started flickering. We all thought it was him going to Heaven, you know?
Leo:
You don't pass through fire to get to Heaven. I think he went to Hell.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Identity and Humor in Dialogue
George:
So, Ira Wright? That's not your real name. You're hiding some Judaism.
Ira:
I don't think I can hide that. My face is circumcised.
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The Uncertain Battle of Medicine and Disease
Dr. Lars:
It's too early to know who's winning the fight: the medicine or the disease.
George:
Did anybody ever tell you you have a scary accent?
Dr. Lars:
You are a very funny man. I enjoy your movies.
George:
And I enjoy all of your movies.
Pieter Vanhecke:
Matthias is een platte gast.
Dr. Lars: [''surprised'']
Which movies?
George: [[Bruce Willis]
The ones where you try to kill ].
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
James Taylor Expresses Frustration with Facebook
James Taylor:
Fuck Facebook!
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Frustration Over Missed Opportunity in Comedy
Leo Koenig:
You son of a bitch! Why didn't you tell me George Simmons wanted us to write jokes for him?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reflection on Life and Mortality
George Simmons: [[Die Hard (film)|Die Hard]
Are you mad that you died at the end of ]?
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Questioning the Effectiveness of Crude Humor
George Simmons:
Is your act just designed to make sure no girl will ever sleep with you again? All you fucking talk about is jacking off and farting. You think a girl's going to come up to afterward and be like, "Oh, would you just jack off for me and then fart in my face?" That's fucking insane. Do you want to get laid, ever?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
