Hamlet 2 poster

Hamlet 2 Quotes

"One high school drama teacher is about to make a huge number 2."

R 2008 · 1h 32m
59
Audience
59
Audience
10 quotes
Embracing Consequences in a Challenging Situation
Cricket Feldstein You wanna hit me? I would love it if you hit me! I'm married to a Jew, I've got nothing to lose!
Timing and Personal Matters in Life
Dana Marschz It's getting late... and my wife is ovulating.
Unexpected Confidence Amidst Personal Struggles
Dana Marschz I'm having a herpes outbreak, right now - but you'd never know it. Thanks, Herpocol!
[in commercial]
Provocative Comments on Theater and Controversy
Cricket Feldstein Well, this play is gonna bitch-slap Broadway like a cheap hooker at a gangbang.
Dana Marschz Uh... yeah.
Cricket Feldstein Y'know, and those Bible-humping protesters can suck a bag of dicks, cause all I ended up doing was giving you free publicity.
Dana Marschz Yeah, and did you see my dressing room? It has a bidet!
Elisabeth Shue That was a sink.
Dana Marschz It was?
The Consequences of Poor Choices
Dana Marschz It's a slippery slope... beer, liquor, dope, coke, meth, chicks with dicks, then jail!
Defiance Against Authority in Theatre
Cricket Feldstein No one is shutting down this play. The Justice Department and the so-called Supreme Court can suck my balls.
Dana Marschz Why do they have to do this?
Cricket Feldstein My balls?
A Disturbing Expression of Frustration
Dana Marschz I feel like I've been raped....IN THE FACE!
Cultural Perspectives on Talent and Opportunity
Dana Marschz You can't let your ethnic narrow-mindedness stop your son from thriving in our culture.
Mr. Marquez I have to take exception to that characterization.
Dana Marschz Heywood's a bad boy. He's a gang banger. A deadbeat. But he also has a gift.
Mrs. Marquez Who is Heywood?
Dana Marschz Your son. Heywood Jablome.
Dana Marschz Oh. I just got that.
Nervousness Around Ethnic Groups Expressed
Epiphany Sellers I still get nervous around ethnics.
A Better Life Awaits Beyond Tucson
Dana Marschz Chuy, you're going to have a magical life. Because no matter where you go, it's always going to be better than Tucson.