I Spy (2002) - Quotes

Taglines: Espionage with attitude.

Alexander Scott: Oh, my gosh.

Kelly Robinson: Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

Carlos: You called, Edna? You are a vision as always. Ah, Hello, Alex.

Alexander Scott: Hi, Carlos. How was Cuba?

Carlos: Es... adequate.

Kelly Robinson: What you doing hanging from the ceiling like that? What you doing?

Alexander Scott: No, don't walk in here.

Kelly Robinson: [''Walks into a infra red security system''] Let me tell you something man, you ain't gonna be telling me what to do all the time. I'm Kelly Robinson, don't talk to me like that. Oh, shit.

Kelly Robinson: He's a bad guy, right?

Alexander Scott: I don't know. People are flip-flopping so much I lost track.

Kelly Robinson: [''After jumping from a building onto a catering tent to escape from bad guys''] Hey! That wasn't so bad!

Alexander Scott: Yeah! Are your legs numb?

Alexander Scott: Is this my stuff?

BNS Equipment Technician: Oh, easy. This is Carlos stuff. This is yours.

Alexander Scott: Where's my monofilament phone descender? And I didn't get one of these exploding pagers. I don't see one of those.

BNS Equipment Technician: You got the micro GPS.

Alexander Scott: Micro?

BNS Equipment Technician: This is your spy-cam.

Alexander Scott: This is Carlos spy-cam, and this is my spy-cam? Look at the size of this thing! Size matters. But in the spy world, it's reversed. You want people to say, "Look how small and sexy and sleek this is." Not "How huge this is! Look at what he pulled out of his pants. It's huge!

Alexander Scott: Did you see that? That was a big explosion.

Kelly Robinson: Damn!

Kelly Robinson: I put this in my eye?

Alexander Scott: I got the camera in my eye.

Kelly Robinson: Hey, what's in that bag.

Alexander Scott: Spy stuff.

Hungarian Cop: [''In Hungarian''] Hands up! What's going on here?

Alexander Scott: [''In Hungurian about Kelly''] The black guy! The black guy mugged me!

Kelly Robinson: [''Being put into handcuffs''; ''Being put into police van''; [w:racial profiling|How come you just arresting the black man?!] I'd like to file a complaint! Wait! Why am I being arrested? Why am I the only one getting arrested? This is bullshit! He kicked me, too! He kicked me in my nuts! Why am I getting arrested if I got kicked in my nuts! ] My nuts was kicked!

Kelly Robinson: [they're running away after a mission gone wrong because of Kelly] You know, I was born semi-pyschic, and I had a bad hunch something was gonna happen in that room.

Alexander Scott: Then, why did you go into the room?

Kelly Robinson: I'm only semi-pyschic! I ain't Miss Cleo!

Alexander Scott: Is this my stuff?

BNS Equipment Technician: Oh, easy. This is Carlos stuff. This is yours.

Alexander Scott: Where's my monofilament phone descender? And I didn't get one of these exploding pagers. I don't see one of those.

BNS Equipment Technician: You got the micro GPS.

Alexander Scott: Micro?

BNS Equipment Technician: This is your spy-cam.

Alexander Scott: This is Carlos spy-cam, and this is my spy-cam? Look at the size of this thing! Size matters. But in the spy world, it's reversed. You want people to say, "Look how small and sexy and sleek this is." Not "How huge this is! Look at what he pulled out of his pants. It's huge!

Kelly Robinson: Kelly Robinson.

Alexander Scott: Are you going to be referring to yourself in the third person, the whole time? Because that can get a little irritating.

Rachel: There's one thing that will always make a man talk.

Alexander Scott: Cutting... my belt?

Kelly Robinson: Hey, what's this? It looks like a sock.

Alexander Scott: It's a secret spy mask, put it on.

Kelly Robinson: [''He puts it on''] Hey man, this is a sock!

Rachel: I'm with B.N.S.

Kelly Robinson: Yeah, what's B.N.S. stand for? Bitch that Needs some Slapping?

Vegas Ring Announcer: Introducing the undisputed champion of the world: Kelly Robinson.

Kelly Robinson: I'm 57 and 0 baby.

Kelly Robinson: Hey, I can see you, and me, and you, and... oh, I like this!

Kelly Robinson: [''To Alex''] Let me show you something a little Kelly Robinson style. Hold on, here we go!

Kelly Robinson: [''To Alex''] Hey, come on now. Hey, come on now. Let me at least see the goods.

Rachel: The switchblade is undetectable through radar, infra red, even the human eye.

Rachel: Don't tell anyone.

Alexander Scott: [''Looking over list''] This is a who's who of the international bad boys club.

Alexander Scott: What you're about to hear is a national secret.

Alexander Scott: [''To Kelly''] That's the type of thing we're gonna be doing on the mission.

Alexander Scott: [''In a sexually aggressive way, Rachel slams Alex against a wall and then down on a cot''; ''Rachel laughs''] Oh! I think you broke my spine. But in a good way.

Alexander Scott: This man is Arnold Gundars, premiere arms dealer. We believe he has the switchblade.

Alexander Scott: [''To Kelly''] It's like you're a double-agent! It's like you're working against me!

Alexander Scott: I'm going to need a couple of jars of jelly on the plane and two parachutes.