Name: Splash
Genre: Fantasy, Comedy, Romance
Released: 1984-03-09
Duration: 110 min
Rating: 6.3
Cast: Tom Hanks, Daryl Hannah, Eugene Levy, John Candy, Dody Goodman

Splash

A Name Unspoken in Translation

Allen What is your name?

Madison It's hard to say in English.

Allen Then just say it in your language.

Madison All right. My name is...

[makes high-pitched squeals that shatter all the television screens]

Allen So, how about those Knicks?

[nervously to the clerks]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Walter Kornbluth's Self-Assessment of Friendliness

Walter Kornbluth I'm a really nice guy. If I had friends you could ask them.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Legacy of Marriage in Family History

Allen Bauer It just so happens I come from a very long line of married people.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Loneliness and the Search for Connection

Allen Bauer Do I expect too much out of life? I don't ask that much, do I? I mean, I don't ask to be famous, rich, or play center field for the New York Yankees, or anything. I just want to meet a woman. I want to meet a woman. And I wanna fall in love, and I want to get married, and I wanna have a kid, and I wanna go see him play a tooth in the school play. It's not much. But I'm kidding myself. This is never going to happen. I'm gonna grow old, and I'm... grow lonely, and I'm gonna die. And I'll be surrounded by a bunch of rotten fruit.

[depressed and intoxicated; ...]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Lost Potential and Unexpected Discoveries

Dr. Zidell What's happened to you? You were the brightest student in my class. True, emotionally you were twelve years old.

Kornbluth I was twelve years old.

Dr. Zidell That's right. And look what you've become, a schmuck.

Kornbluth There is a mermaid in New York City.

Dr. Zidell Oh, oh, sure, sure. You mean this-this-this naked girl? How come she's got legs?

Kornbluth She has legs out of the water, she has fins in the water. You taught me that, Dr. Zidell, don't you remember? You taught me all the legends.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Unexpected Circumstances and Language Proficiency

Allen Freddie, the woman learned how to speak English in a single afternoon.

Freddie She could probably speak English already. I think she was in shock from being arrested, you know?

Allen Well now, what about that, huh? What about a woman showing up naked in a public place, Freddie?

Freddie Well I'm in for it, of course.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Beach Island Transport Inquiry

Claude There's a guy down the beach that runs people out to the island.

Allen What's the name?

Claude The guy or the island?

Allen I'll find him.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Unconventional Love and Its Challenges

Allen I don't understand. All my life, I've been waiting for someone and when I find her, she's... she's a fish.

Freddie Nobody said love's perfect.

Allen Oh, Freddie, I don't expect it to be perfect! But for God's sake, it's usually human! Every day, people meet, they fall in love, every day! And look at what I got.

Freddie Look at what you got, huh? Yeah, let's look at what you got. Let's take a good look at what you got. People fall in love every day, huh? Is that what you said?

[angrily]

Allen Yeah.

Freddie Yeah? Well, that's a crock. It doesn't work that way. Look, do you at least realize how happy you were with her? That is, of course, when you weren't driving yourself crazy. Every day? Come on. Some people will never be that happy. I'll never be that happy! What am I talking to you for? You don't know anything. Mrs. Stimler!

[pause; leaves the office]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

A Confused Moment with Reporters and Friends

Freddie Allen, you all right?

Allen Yeah, get me outta here!

Freddie Is anyone here from Penthouse Magazine?

Reporters No.

Freddie Then we ain't talkin'.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Symbolism and Identity in Splash Scene

Freddie They published my letter. Here it is, "A lesbian no more". They published my letter.

[excitedly waves an issue of Penthouse magazine]

Stan Welcome to the ]. The statue is a gift from French citizens that has come to symbolize hope for naked women everywhere.

[[Statue of Liberty]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Half Wrong About Finding Love

Taglines Allen Bauer thought he'd never find the right woman... He was only half wrong!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Discovery of the Mermaid

Walter Kornbluth I was right. Behold, the mermaid!

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

The Science of Drinking and Body Weight

Freddie You see, drinking is a matter of algebraic ratio. How drunk you get is caused by the amount of alcohol you consume in relation to your total body weight. You see my point? It's not that you had too much to drink. You're just too skinny.

Freddie Bartender! Another round for my friend and I here!

Allen No, no, Freddie! I don't want to get drunk!

Freddie But you are drunk. You see, a sober person would have reached for the pretzels.

Bartender Is he gonna be up there all day?

Freddie I don't know.

Allen Ohh... I'm on the bar!

[coming to]

Freddie Oh, you're on the bar. Here, let me help you down.

Freddie Uh-oh, you fell.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Father's Call Requires Response

Allen Are there any messages?

Mrs. Stimler Oh, yes.

[goes back to working]

Allen And they are?

[pause]

Mrs. Stimler Huh? Oh, your father called. He wants you to call him back.

Allen Mrs. Stimler, our father passed away about five years ago. Do you remember?

[pauses]

Mrs. Stimler Right. Shall I get him for you?

[confused look]

Allen No, thank you.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Unrequited Love Leads to Departure

Allen You know by the time I got there, she was already gone.

Freddie Victoria left, huh?

Allen Yeah. You know why she left, Freddie? Because I didn't love her.

Freddie That bitch.

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Frustration Over Misunderstanding of Identity

Allen Bauer I am not a fish! How many times do I have to tell you people that? Now, will you just let me outta here? Please? Huh? People?

[while standing naked in a tank with wires trailing from his body]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

A Tense Encounter Between Two Characters

Claude Hey, Mr. Cornbeef?

Kornbluth Kornbluth!

Claude Whatcha lookin for down there? Buried treasure?

Kornbluth Wanna know what I'm lookin for? Boys? I'll tell ya. NONE OF YOUR GODDAMN BUSINESS!! THAT'S WHAT I'M LOOKIN FOR! Get outta my way!

[screams; dives off the ship into the water]

Claude That's pee down his air hose.

[laughs]

Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.

Splash

Tension Builds as Characters Face Confrontation

Allen All right, Madison, now this is getting scary. If you don't open this door, I'm going to break it down!

Madison No, Allen! Please!

Allen Madison!

Madison Allen, no!

[throws a towel over herself]

Allen All right, that's it!

Madison Hi.

Allen Hi. Is everything okay?

Madison Yeah.

Allen Why wouldn't you let me in?

Madison I was... shy.

Allen You were shy? After the cab, the elevator, and on top of the refrigerator, you were shy?

Madison I was shy.

Allen She was shy.

[to himself]

Splash

Understanding Secrets in Relationships

Madison You said whatever my secret was, you'd understand.

Allen Yeah...but...

Madison You thought at least I was a human being.

Splash

Unexpected Encounter at the Statue of Liberty

Taglines Two days ago, this girl showed up naked at the Statue of Liberty. For Allen Bauer, it was love at first sight. Now, everyone is chasing her... trying to prove she's a mermaid. From the first laugh, you'll be hooked.

Splash

Freddie Dismisses Mrs. Stimler's Message List

Freddie What are you looking at? You never saw a guy who slept with a fish before? Get back to work!

Mrs. Stimler Oh Mr. Bauer, you had a million messages. I wrote them down here. You got calls from CBS, NBC, ABC, AP, UPI, Time, Ted Turner, Newsweek, Marineland, Ripley's Believe it or Not, and Mrs. Paul.

[to Allen]

Freddie Not now, Mrs. Stimler. All right.

Splash

Harmless beachcomber or intrusive researcher?

Walter Kornbluth I suppose you're just some harmless beachcomber who happens to wear a tuxedo! How dare you try and horn in on someone else's research!

Splash

A Wedding's Unforeseen Emotional Turmoil

Wedding Guest Hey, Allen! Where's Victoria?

Allen She's not coming! What, do you want your money back?!

Guest Hey, Allen!

Allen She left me! She moved out and my life's shambles, all right? That's the news, you want the weather? Anywhere but the first three rows!

Splash

The Ideal Woman in Allen's Eyes

Taglines She was the woman of Allen's dreams. She had large dark eyes, a beautiful smile, and a great pair of fins.

Splash

Navigating First Impressions and Relationships

Allen I didn't even like you when I first met you.

Kornbluth Nobody likes me when they first meet me.

Madison Allen...

Kornbluth Move!

Splash Quotes

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