17 quotes
Questioning the Existence of the Film
Taglines
Movie? What movie?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Bad Movie Scenario Unfolds
Nick Rivers
Listen to me, Hillary. I'm not the first guy who fell in love with a woman that he met at a restaurant who turned out to be the daughter of a kidnapped scientist, only to lose her to her childhood lover who she last saw on a deserted island, who then turned out fifteen years later to be the leader of the French underground.
Hillary Flammond
I know. It all sounds like some bad movie.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Unspoken troubles and unexpected discoveries
Nick Rivers
Are you in some kind of trouble with the police?
Hillary Flammond
Some things are much better left unsaid.
Nick Rivers
Like what?
Hillary Flammond
Well, you know... sometimes when you blow your nose into a tissue and you put it in your purse, then a little while later you have to reach in there for your lipstick or something, and your hand gushes into it, and it goes all over...
Nick Rivers
Okay, okay, you're right, you're right. Some things are better left unsaid.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Struggles with Intimacy and Communication
Martin
Nick, I've tried everything: the embassy, the German government, the consulate. I even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It's no use, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Dealing with Life's Misfortunes Maturely
Deja Vu
Don't take it so hard Nick, life is filled with it's little miseries, each of us in his own way must learn to deal with adversity in a mature and adult fashion.
[Sneezes into hands, screams and jumps out a window]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
The Ongoing Struggle Against Oppression
Hillary Flammond
I'm needed here. For as long as a single man is forced to cower under the iron fist of oppression, as long as a child cries out in the night, or an actor can be elected president, we must continue the struggle.
Nick Rivers
No, Hillary. It is too dangerous for you in Germany, now.
Dr. Flammond
Yes, go with Nick. Don't worry about us. We will hear his music on the "Voice of America". We will hear it in the hearts of people, and in elevators everywhere. And as long as we do, we know we are not alone in our fight.
Nick Rivers
They're right, Hillary. And when we get to America...
Hillary Flammond
Who knows what will be then.
Nick Rivers
Everything will be fine.
Hillary Flammond
Things change, people change, hairstyles change...
Nick Rivers
I want you to be with me.
Hillary Flammond
Interest rates fluctuate. Who knows?
NIck Rivers
Don't you want to come with me? If you don't, say it now.
Hillary Flammond
Want! Want more than anything! Take me. Take me with you! Goodbye, Chocolate Mousse. I'll never forget you. Goodbye, Du Quois. Take care of yourself. Goodbye, Deja Vu. I will always remember you. And I'll miss you, most of all, Scarecrow.
[hugging her friends goodbye]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
General Streck Inquires About Sergeant Kruger
General Streck
What is the condition of Sergeant Kruger? Very well, let me know if there is any change in his condition. He's dead.
[on the phone; pause; Hangs up]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Cold and Its Effects
Nick Rivers
What's wrong with him?
Wagon Driver
Oh, he caught a cold last week and he's just a little hoarse.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Names and Their Unusual Meanings
Nick Rivers
Hillary. That's an unusual name.
Hillary Flammond
It's German. It means she whose bosoms defy gravity'.
Nick Rivers
Pleased to meet you. My name's Nick.
Hillary Flammond
Nick? What does that mean?
Nick Rivers
Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it while he was shaving.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Secret Not to be Shared
Taglines
Don't tell anyone.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
From the Creators of "Airplane!
Taglines
From the makers of the original "Airplane!" (not the Wright brothers)
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Tennis Preferences and Personal Biases Explored
Hillary Flammond
Who do you favor in the Virginia Slims tournament?
Blindman
In women's tennis, I always root against the heterosexual.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Misunderstanding Over Dropped Item
Agent Cedric
Wait. You dropped your phony dog poo.
Blindman
What phony dog poo?
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Urgency and Danger in a Secrecy Context
Dr Paul Flammond
Go quickly. If they find out you've seen this, your life will be worth less than a truck load of dead rats in a tampon factory.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Question About Age in Conversation
Nick Rivers
Ist der Tochter achtzehn bitten?
Martin
What's that mean?
Nick Rivers
Is your daughter eighteen?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Culinary Confusion in a Restaurant Setting
Nick Rivers
I really don't know any German.
[to the Waiter]
Hillary Flammond
That's all right. I know a little German. He's sitting over there. What do you recommend?
[pause; to the Waiter, in German]
Waiter
I recommend the pork bellies marinated in diced pig entrails or the roast swine knuckles poached with flaming hog balls.
[in German]
Nick Rivers
Anything's fine.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Escape in a Balloon During Presidency
Hillary Flammond
My uncle was born in America.
Nick Rivers
Oh, really?
Hillary Flammond
But he was one of the lucky ones. He managed to escape in a balloon during the ] presidency.
[[Jimmy Carter]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.