Movie Review: ‘You Hurt My Feelings’

The latest collaboration between director Nicole Holofcener and lead Julia Louis-Dreyfus is another entertaining collection of neurotic characters focusing on their issues.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Beth in A24's 'You Hurt My Feelings.'

In theaters May 26th, ‘You Hurt My Feelings’ represents a reunion for director Nicole Holofcener and star Julia Louis-Dreyfus, and a welcome one at that.

In an era when adult dramas and comedies have a hard time finding space between giant franchise behemoths crowding the multiplex, it’s reassuring to know that ‘You Hurt My Feelings’ represents the latest reliable low-key laugh-grabber from Holofcener, who specializes in stories of characters obsessed with their emotional and life status, whose worlds are thrown for a loop by unexpected circumstances.

You Hurt My Feelings

R1 hr 33 minMay 26th, 2023

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What’s the story of ‘You Hurt My Feelings’?

The film charts the emotional rollercoaster of married couple Louis-Dreyfus’ Beth (a writer whose memoir was published to some acclaim and whose latest book, a work of fiction, is still in progress) and Don (Tobias Menzies), a therapist who is losing faith in his ability to counsel his increasingly dissatisfied patients and in his own appearance.

Their seemingly happy, if slightly rut-riding marriage is plunged into disarray when Beth overhears Don telling brother-in-law Mark (Arian Moayed) that he doesn’t really like her new novel after reading many drafts. Stunned, Beth begins to question whether he’s ever truly been honest with her, and how real she has been with others in her life, including sister Sarah (Michaela Watkins) and son Eliot (Owen Teague), an aspiring writer himself currently biding his time managing a New York cannabis store.

As the ripples of the unlikely drama spread out through both partners’ work and family groups, real truths start to swim to the surface of this seemingly happy relationship.

Jeannie Berlin as Georgia in A24's 'You Hurt My Feelings.'

Who else is in the movie?

Aside from the leads, Holofcener’s latest also features Jeannie Berlin as Beth and Sarah’s grouchy mother Georgia, Amber Tamblyn, David Cross, Zach Cherry and Sarah Steele among Don’s patients, plus Bryan Reynoso, Karolena Greenidge, Doug Moe, Lynnsey Lewis and Claudia Robinson.

(L to R) Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Beth and director Nicole Holofcener on the set of A24's 'You Hurt My Feelings.'

A welcome reunion

The biggest advantage that ‘Feelings’ has –– beyond Holofcener’s typically incisive, funny script and subtle direction –– is her welcome reunion with Louis-Dreyfus after 2013’s ‘Enough Said’. She may have some way to go to be a Holofcener collaborator on the scale of, say, Catherine Keener, but the two have clearly found a solid vibe.

As Beth, Louis-Dreyfus switches tracks from (mostly) contented wife and mother to puddle of neuroses, perfectly conveying the sort of nervy artistic character yearning for approval from those around them and saddled with a mother (Berlin’s Georgia is more of a standard character type but gives her layers) who is never quite satisfied. Louis-Dreyfus sells every moment of Beth’s journey, turning what could be a frustrating archetype into a relatable woman. She’s given more to do than, say, her turn as Jonah Hill’s overzealous Jewish mother in ‘You People’.

Tobias Menzies as Don in A24's 'You Hurt My Feelings.'

As Don, meanwhile, British actor Menzies is also great. Far from being a stock husband in a movie like this, he has his own inner life and a clutch of funny, grumpy therapy clients with their own issues (Cross and Tamblyn bring humorous real-life married couple energy to two of them) and is the perfect twitchy complement to Beth. It’s also entertaining how he’s the sort of therapist quick to offer advice to others about how to figure out their relationships but seemingly stymied by the mildest issue arising in his own.

And their marriage comes across as realistic and nuanced, rather than schticky, even when in the midst of their disagreement.

Yet while Beth and Don are the focus, the film shares the care and attention beyond them, building up Watkins’ Sarah and her frustrations as an interior designer, picking out ever more ridiculous/ugly lamps for a choosy client (Clara Wong’s Ali), and questioning whether she’d be better off ditching the job and finding something more meaningful. Moayed, meanwhile, Sarah’s schlubby actor husband, is dealing with his own career crisis. Mildly successful in movies, he’s now struggling with his latest job in the theater and beginning to wonder whether acting is something he should do at all. More normally found being much slicker and successful on ‘Succession’, Moayed is a great fourth pillar in the central story.

(L to R) Tobias Menzies as Don and Julia Louis-Dreyfus as Beth in A24's 'You Hurt My Feelings.'

Are there issues?

As is normal for Holofcener, the stakes are incredibly low-level, seen as a problem only really by the people involved. And there is a chance that will turn off some audiences –– is it really possible to truly empathize with wealthy (or at least comfortable) New Yorkers whining about someone not liking their latest work or feeling let down by their professional choices? Fortunately, the writer/director finds the humanity in these characters, and the various actors give you enough to make you care how their stories turn out.

Yet in a movie where there are so many well-drawn characters, it’s only really Eliot who suffers from a slightly undernourished take; it’s no fault of Teague, who offers a funny performance, but he really only has one opportunity to shine, in a minor breakdown in front of his parents about how his mother’s encouragement set him up to fail at life.

But those are relatively minor complaints in the effective new film from a writer/director whose keen sense of comedy and character are undimmed. It’s a pleasure to have new work from Holofcener, and something reliably entertaining for anyone who isn’t drawn to capes fluttering in the wind, or cars racing around the streets.

It might not be quite on the same level as ‘Enough Said’, or the Oscar-nominated, Melissa McCarthy-starring ‘Can You Ever Forgive Me?’, but ‘You Hurt My Feelings’ is a solid entry in Holofcener’s neuroses-laden character canon.

‘You Hurt My Feelings’ receives 7 out of 10 stars.