Mila KunisQuotes

Mona Sax: You don't want to make it out alive. You think that if he puts you out of your misery, that you will be with them again?

Max Payne: Yeah. I hope that's how it works.

Mona Sax: Drop it, shithead.

Max Payne: Just take it easy.

Mona Sax: Give me your backup piece with your left hand.

Max Payne: That's it.

Mona Sax: Kneel down.

Max Payne: What?

Mona Sax: Kneel the fuck down! We need to talk about my sister.

Jenny: Jill, you're making a mess!

Jill: Well, this stuff is pretty good. What's in it?

Wayne: The Szalinski brothers.

Lombardi: You don't have to leave, you know. You're more than welcome to stay. You'll be perfectly safe here.

Solara: Thank you. But this is something I have to do.

Lombardi: Where will you go?

Solara: [thoughtfully as she holds the sword] Home.

Solara: I want to come with you.

Eli: No, you don't.

Solara: ... I hate it here.

Eli: Then change it.

Eli: [Wakes up, grabs Solara's arm as she digs through his backpack] What are you doing?

Solara: I'm sorry, I thought you were asleep.

Eli: I wasn't asleep. Now, what are you doing?

Solara: I just wanted to see the book.

Eli: No one touches the book but me. You understand? Do you understand?

Solara: Yes, I understand.

Eli: Alright then, go to sleep.

Eli: You says you don't know how to read anyway, so it's no use to you.

Solara: Yeah. So teach me.

Eli: I walk by faith, not by sight.

Solara: What does that mean?

Eli: It means that you know something even if you don't know something.

Solara: That doesn't make any sense.

Eli: It doesn't have to make sense. It's faith. It's faith. It's the flower of light in the field of darkness that's giving me the strength to carry on, you understand?

Solara: Is that from your book?

Eli: [[Johnny Cash; [w:At Folsom Prison|At Folsom Prison] No, its uh...] Live "].

Solara: What?

Eli: [seeing the grave yard in the backyard of the homestead] We gotta go now.

Solara: They killed all these people.

Eli: Not just killed them. They ate them.

Solara: Her hands... her hands were shaking.

Eli: Too much human meat. Let's go!

Solara: Do you remember what it was like? I mean, in the world before?

Eli: People had more than they needed. We had no idea what was precious, what wasn't. We threw away things people kill each other for now.

Solara: You said I could come with you if I took you to the water!

Solara: I didn't think you would ever give up the book. I thought it was important to you.

Solara: Have you ever thought that maybe you were lost?

Peter Bretter: [Rachel has just walked in on him naked in his changing room; he covers himself with his free hand; holds up his phone; after a moment, Rachel bursts out laughing] I was just calling you. Um... wow.

Rachel Jansen: [keeps laughing; Peter grins sheepishly; she keeps laughing] Oh, Peter! ) I'm sorry.

Peter Bretter: Stop laughing. Can, can you please stop laughing?

Rachel Jansen: [walks towards him] I missed you.

Peter Bretter: [Rachel cuts him off with a passionate kiss] Um, I just wanted to tell you, I've been thinking a lot about...

Peter Bretter: Wow! You came... I- I can't believe that you came.

Rachel Jansen: Peter, this is... this is great. It was really funny, yeah.

Peter Bretter: [they laugh, then there is an awkward pause] Thank you. You know what? I didn't realize that it was a comedy and then, someone told me that, and it just, like opened the whole thing up! How long are you in town for?

Rachel Jansen: Open-ended.

Peter Bretter: Oh! Wow. Bold.

Rachel Jansen: [smiles] Yeah, you know... I'm kinda checking out some schools.

Peter Bretter: [smiles] Congratulations.

Rachel Jansen: Yeah, maybe. [pause You never called.

Peter Bretter: [pause; he and Rachel laugh] You told me not to... and I listened. Wasn't easy...I might have called once and hung up, from a private number.

Dwayne: I don't understand what there is to think about.

Rachel Jansen: Because, D, he...

Dwayne: She licked the tip. That doesn't count.

Rachel Jansen: Of course it counts! He...

Dwayne: He what? He refused a blowjob from his ex-girlfriend mid-blowjob! Do you know what that's like for a man?! It's called blue balls, Rachel. This guy is like Gandhi, but better. He likes puppets! I love puppets.

Rachel Jansen: Listen to me, Peter. I was a mess, too. I understand that, okay? But it does not excuse you acting like a complete asshole!

Peter Bretter: Rachel, look, I know that I fucked things up for a minute, but I am not like every other asshole!

Rachel Jansen: You should not be with anybody, right now. Anybody.

Peter Bretter: I know... I know that there is something here. I know I wasn't wrong about that. And yes, it's only been four days, but I know you feel it, too.

Rachel Jansen: [quietly] I need you to leave. Do not write me, do not call me, do not email me. Peter, I need you to go.

Peter Bretter: [pause, nods] I won't bother you anymore...I'm sorry.

Sarah Marshall: [after she, Peter and Rachel have each had a lot of wine] So... just so we're clear, and so that I can kinda hone in on your, your central thesis of the night, wade through all the bullshit, you're telling me you think you have the right to just fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime? That's what you're saying?

Aldous Snow: [spills his cranberry juice over the Tommy Bahama shirt Sarah bought him, and doesn't notice; notices the spill and laughs; laughing] Yes! That's right, there it is! Not so eloquently as you just put it, sweetheart, but... Ultimately, that is... Oh, no! Not the shirt! Take my eyes, but not the shirt! Mmm, yeah, that's pretty much what I believe, Sarah.

Sarah Marshall: When you're done making jokes, are you gonna get a napkin?!

Aldous Snow: D'you know what, I think I've improved it, actually! Against all odds, I think I deserve a design award!

Sarah Marshall: [quietly and angrily] Just please get some seltzer water.

Aldous Snow: [Matthew rushes over and tries vigorously to clean off Aldous' shirt, while Aldous tries to fend him off; Rachel laughs] Um, garcon, could we get some...

Matthew Van Der Wyk: I saw it from farther away. Okay, just lean back for a sec. Let me...

Aldous: [Matthew reluctantly backs off as a waitress brings dessert] No, it's all right, it's not there. You're very diligent, and I appreciate it, but, let go of the glass now, you're gonna have to walk away, bless you.

Peter Brenner: [in mock reaction to the dessert] Oh me, oh my, call the doctor.

Rachel Jansen: [they both laugh; Rachel feeds Peter some of her dessert.] Oh, good!

Peter Bretter: I love Hawaii.

Rachel Jansen: [laughs] It's good, huh?

Sarah Marshall: Yeah, it's nice, but I think, for like a week, tops. Any more than that, and I know I'd go crazy, because I think that Hawaii is a place to escape for people who can't deal with the real world.

Rachel Jansen: [she feeds Peter another bite of dessert, then grabs his face and kisses him.] Yeah, you know, there's so few personal shoppers and pet therapists. Gosh, it's such a hard life. I like living here.

Rachel Jansen: Wow, we’re really going up to the edge of this, huh?

Peter Bretter: Look.

Rachel Jansen: Wow, this is really beautiful. All right, so now that your show’s done, are you gonna finish the Dracula musical?

Peter Bretter: It’s not that was, you know. Sarah always thought it was crazy and...

Peter Bretter: I just don't feel like doing anything.

Rachel Jansen: Why?

Peter Bretter: Cause my heart is broken, and I can't imagine doing anything right now. It's probably the same reason... you don't go back to school, you know? Maybe it's good we got hurt like that, you know? don't know about you, but it makes me feel impervious to pain.

Rachel Jansen: Yeah. Kind of like there's nothing left to be afraid of.

Peter Bretter: Yeah. No, exactly.

Rachel Jansen: Right.

Peter Bretter: We could leap off this rock, and it won't hurt us as had as they did.

Rachel Jansen: So, jump then.

Peter Bretter: No, I meant that, like as a metaphor, you know?

Rachel Jansen: No. Just do it. You'll be fine. Jump.

Peter Bretter: Oh, god. Oh, god. I made her kill yourself. You must be crazy.

Rachel Jansen: So, are you gonna jump, or what.

Peter Bretter: No.

Rachel Jansen: Come on, Peter! I can see vagina from here. I can see hoo-ha.

Peter Bretter: I mean, I'll jump!

Rachel Jansen: Chicken, come on.

Peter Bretter: [while hanging from a cliff] So what should I do? I should just let go?

Rachel Jansen: No, no, no, no, no. If you fall straight down, you'll probably hit a rock and kill yourself!

Peter Bretter: Totally. So what do I do?!

Rachel Jansen: Why don't you just press your feet up against the rock, and like, shoot yourself off!

Peter Bretter: What, like a frog?!

Rachel Jansen: I don't know, Peter- just get off the fucking rock!

Peter Bretter: [pause] Here I go! One!

Rachel Jansen: Two!

Peter Bretter: [pause] Two! Two and a half-

Rachel Jansen: Jump!

Peter Bretter: [jumps, falls awkwardly, but safely, into the sea near Rachel] Three!

Rachel Jansen: Oh, my god. Oh, my god. Oh, my god. You saw right?

Peter Bretter: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw it.

Rachel Jansen: I was there I witnessed it.

Peter Bretter: [smiling] Thanks.

Rachel Jansen: Where's your wife, sir?

Darald Braden: She is in bed.

Peter Brenner: How are things going with the lady?

Darald Braden: [[The Da Vinci Code; pause] Not awesome. She's complicated- like ], you know, but- harder to... crack. But life is full of lessons, you learn something new every day, so... wonder what I'm going to learn... tomorrow? Well! Good night!

Rachel Jansen: Good night, sir.

Peter Bretter: Night, sir.

Darald Braden: Off to find the mythical clitoris!

Rachel Jansen: [Peter snickers into his drink] So! Peter, were you able to get that crying lady out of your room? Cause, I could send someone up, if you want.

Peter Bretter: Oh, you could?

Rachel Jansen: Yeah.

Peter Bretter: That's very funny. It is.

Rachel Jansen: Well, listen. The Sarah Marshall Show sucks. Who cares?

Peter Bretter: [awkward pause] I do the music for that program.

Rachel Jansen: Well, did I mention that the music rocks?

Peter Bretter: [chuckles; mimics a line from the show; imitates one of his 'tones' and he and Rachel both laugh] That's very sweet of you. That's very sweet of you to say. You don't have to say that, though. It's not music. There's no melody, it's just tones. Just dark, ominous tones. "The Masturbating Dog-Killer is on the loose again! He'll kill the owner, but at least the dogs are happy!

Peter Bretter: [answering the phone after he has been sobbing on his balcony] Hello?

Rachel Jansen: Peter?

Peter Bretter: Sarah?

Rachel Jansen: No, it's Rachel Jansen, from the front desk.

Peter Bretter: [making an effort to control his voice] Hey.

Rachel Jansen: Hey, what's going on up there? I'm getting complaints about a woman, crying hysterically?

Peter Bretter: [his voice begins to break again] Yeah, you know what, and I hear her too, and it sounds like she's having such a hard time. I think it's coming from the floor above me.

Rachel Jansen: You're on the top floor.

Peter Bretter: [pause] I'll try and keep it down.

Rachel Jansen: Are you okay?

Peter Bretter: Yeah, you have a nice night.

Rachel Jansen: [she hangs up. Cut to Peter curled up on his floor, sobbing just as loudly.] Okay.

Rachel Jansen: Welcome to Turtle Bay. What can I do for you?

Peter Bretter: [smiles weakly] I'm checking in. My name's Bretter. Peter Bretter. But actually, I don't have a reservation. Just thought I'd... take my chances.

Rachel Jansen: [she looks through the registrar] Oh! Wow. Bold! We are all booked up, but we do have the Kapua Suite available.

Peter Bretter: Um, okay. How much is that?

Rachel Jansen: $6,000 a night.

Peter Bretter: Wow.

Rachel Jansen: Beautiful views.

Peter Bretter: [he looks around; he jumps as he looks out the window and sees Sarah walking by] I can imagine... that's a little bit out of my price range. Sorry. That's a shame. This is such a beautiful... ( hotel.

Rachel Jansen: [laughs] Oh, yeah, it's Sarah Marshall from Crime Scene. People are excited that she's here.

Peter Bretter: She's my ex-girlfriend. We broke up three weeks ago.

Rachel Jansen: Oh. I'm sorry, sir.

Peter Bretter: Okay, like, this is fine, right?

Rachel Jansen: Sir?

Peter Bretter: [looks over his shoulder and sees Sarah entering the lobby] It's totally fine. Okay, there she is. Did she see me?

Rachel Jansen: Uh-huh.

Peter Bretter: Is she coming over here?

Rachel Jansen: Yup.

Peter Bretter: I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt.

Rachel Jansen: [Peter opens the top two buttons of the shirt and looks at her for approval] Fair enough. Why don't you try unbuttoning it? Button it back up.

Sarah Marshall: Peter?

Peter Bretter: Hey. Hi.

Sarah Marshall: What are you doing here?

Peter Bretter: [chuckles hysterically] I came here to murder you.

Sarah: Really, what are you doing here?

Peter Brenner: I have been having a tough time, you know, back in L.A. Uh, but then, I came here, and here you are. I just think that's too crazy to...

Aldous Snow: [enters the lobby; slaps Sarah's rear and kisses her forehead, catching her off-guard; holds up a black flip-flop; to Rachel] Hey there, little sex object! I've lost a shoe Have you seen it anywhere? It's like this one, but obviously it's, um opposite of um, excuse me, Misses? I've lost a shoe. It's like this one. It's like, this one's fellow. Sort of like the exact opposite of this one, in fact.

Rachel Jansen: Uh-huh?

Aldous Snow: Not like, an evil version, but just, you know, a shoe, like this, but for the other foot, otherwise I'd have to...

Sarah Marshall: Aldous, this is Peter.

Aldous Snow: [shakes hands with Peter and shoulder-bumps him] Hey! Alright, Peter! Nice to meet you, mate. Aldous. Good to meet you, man.

Sarah Marshall: My ex-boyfriend.

Aldous Snow: Oh, right! Hey, I'm Aldous Snow.

Peter Bretter: I know who you are. Yeah, you're very, very famous.

Aldous Snow: Yeah, I am, I am... for my sins. So, are you, um, staying here as well?

Peter Bretter: I'm not, as a matter...

Rachel Jansen: [to Peter] I'm sorry. Excuse me, Mr. Bretter, Ms. Marshall. But, we were, um, able to book the Kapua suite for you, sir, for four nights.

Peter Bretter: You were?

Rachel Jansen: [smiles and nods] Yes, sir.

Peter Bretter: Marvelous!

Aldous Snow: Perfect! Perfect amount of time. Listen, if you want to have dinner with us one of those nights, you're very...

Sarah Marshall: Aldous!

Peter Bretter: No. No, that's very gentlemanly of you, but, uh, you two enjoy your trip, and, uh, I'll be just fine on my own in my Kapua Suite.

Aldous Snow: Alright, Peter.

Sarah Marshall: Have a good trip, Pete.

Aldous Snow: [he and Sarah walk away; to Sarah] I like your shirt. It's colorful. Bye, ta-ta! I was wearing two shoes this morning, wasn't I?

Peter Bretter: [to Rachel] Bye, now. Thank you. Thank you for bailing me out like that, but I still can't afford that room.

Rachel Jansen: [hands him a key] Nobody can. It's for, like, Oprah, or like, Celine Dion. Really, it's not a big deal. So, you can stay in the suite, but since you're not technically a guest, you have to clean up after yourself. Otherwise, here is your room key, and enjoy your stay!

Peter Bretter: Why are you doing this for me?

Rachel Jansen: She's here with some guy already? Kind of messed up.

Peter Bretter: Yeah, right?! Thank you.

Rachel Jansen: Really, it's not a big deal. Go, go enjoy yourself!

Peter Bretter: [tries to read her nametag] Rachel...

Rachel Jansen: Jansen.

Peter Bretter: Jansen. I mean, a thousand times, thank you! You know what I mean? I...

Rachel Jansen: Go. Go enjoy yourself!

Amy Mitchell: [crowd cheers; crowd cheers louder; crowd cheers] First of all, I just wanna say this, that I think that we, as moms, do way too much stuff. And if I'm elected, I promise you we are gonna do way less. Right? Less PTA meetings, less luncheons, less fuckin bake sales, just less bullshit! Wait, wait, wait, wait. And I think that our kids need a break, too, you guys. Come on, now, school starts way too fucking early, okay? God, and they have way too much homework. I mean, our kids don't even have time to be kids anymore, am I right? And what is up with these five standardized tests a week? We should not be teaching our kids how to be good test-takers. We should be teaching them how to be good people! What is a standardized test? So, if you're a mom who's overworked, overstressed, or if you're just a mom who wants to do less...then just vote for me.

Amy Mitchell: [sighs; mouthing; wailing] I'm Amy Mitchell, and I'm a mom. I had my first kid when I was 20 years old, and I've been running late ever since. My days are filled with dropping the kids at school... Love you. ...then racing to work where I have meeting, after meeting, after meeting. I usually end up eating a shitty lunch at my desk, and I try to work out once a week. Why do I suck at Zumba? Most days, I race back to school for the kids plays, and poetry readings and class projects...which I'm always late for. Sorry. And then there's PTA meetings, and volunteering and parent-teacher conferences. Jesus, Miss Wiggins fuckin hates me. At least once a day, I feel like the worst mom in the world, and I cry in my car. Then I shuttle the kids to piano lessons and soccer games and dance classes and doctors appointments, before my daily trip to the grocery store. Ugh. This chick seems like she's got it all figured out. But I feel like I'm screwing up all the time. Still, I love being a mom.

Jupiter Jones: Actually, you know what, I'm feeling a little over-dressed, so if you have something I can change into. By myself. While I'm awake.

Jupiter Jones: Technically speaking, I'm an alien, and from the perspective of Immigration, an illegal one. My parents met at the University in Saint Petersburg, where he taught Astrophysics and she taught Applied Mathematics. My mother fell in love with him when she found him almost frozen to death on the bank of the Neva, staring at the stars. The problem with astrology? Total bullshit.

Jamie Rellis: [sees posters for "The Ugly Truth" on a wall; [w:Katherine Heigl|Katherine Heigl] I really have to stop buying into this bullshit Hollywood cliche of true love. Shut up, ], you stupid, little liar!

Jamie Rellis: [Everybody boos him; Everybody cheers him] Everybody, this is Dylan. He's from L.A. He's the reason I can afford all this beer!

Jamie Rellis: [face; legs; nose] I have the perfect body for Photoshop. This gets more angular, these get longer and this gets way more Christian.

Jamie Rellis: Are you trying to dig your way to China?

Chief Geraldine Scott: What the hell was that?

Blanc: Road to Damascus. Scales fell from my eyes.

Chief Scott: So what? Facts, schmacts? You believe in God and all this mishegoss is real?

Blanc: No, no. God is a fiction. My revelation came from…from Father Jud. His example to have grace. Grace for my enemy. Grace for the broken. Grace for those who…deserve it the least, but who need it the most. For the guilty.