31 quotes
Convicts Challenge Authority in The Longest Yard
Convicts
] as Paul "Wrecking" Crewe
[[Adam Sandler]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Convict's Perspective on Life Challenges
Convicts
] as Big Tony
[[w:Joey Diaz|Joey Diaz]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Find Strength in Unity
Convicts
] as Deacon Moss
[[w:Michael Irvin|Michael Irvin]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Prison Guard Reflects on Authority and Control
Prison Staff
] as Guard Garner
[[w:Brian Bosworth|Brian Bosworth]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Real Football Challenge Against the Guards
Battle
Wow, no bullshit? Real football, against the guards?
Nate Scarborough
Full contact.
Battle
Captain Knauer is their quarterback?
Caretaker
Yup.
Battle
So I get to...tackle him?
Paul Crewe
Yeah, you can either tackle him or hit him over the head with that hammer.
[Pointing to Battle's crotch.]
Battle
I want to hurt him, not kill him.
[Grins]
Caretaker
Let's get out of here before that thing bites someone.
[To Crewe]
Paul
Okay, we'll see you and your pet iguana at practice.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Inmate Rating System Explained
Nate Scarborough
Hazen has a rating system for every con.
[accessing main computer]
Paul Crewe
What's three stars?
[sees the three-star rating on Big Tony Cobianco's file]
Nate
The more prone to violence that the inmate is, the more stars he gets.
Skitchy
Five stars is the max.
Caretaker
I didn't know that.
Skitchy
Yeah.
Caretaker
Let's see how many stars my maniacal ass got.
[Nate accesses file and sees Caretaker only had a 0.5 star rating]
Paul
Wow.
Caretaker
Half a star? That's gotta be a mistake. Check it again. Check it again.
Paul
You're about as maniacal as a boxful of kittens.
Caretaker
Come on, that's not funny, man. I'm gonna have to stab somebody or something. Get my rep up.
Paul
Why don't we have a maniacal pillow fight tonight. That could get it up some.
Skitchy
Yeah. We can sell it to pay-per-view. Superstar Versus Half-a-Star.
[overhears]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing teamwork despite challenging circumstances
Convicts
] as Miss Tucker
[[w:Tracy Morgan|Tracy Morgan]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Reflect on Their Situation
Convicts
] as Switowski
[[w:Bob Sapp|Bob Sapp]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Reflection on Life Behind Bars
Convicts
] as James "Caretaker" Farrell
[[Chris Rock]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authority and Control in Prison Environment
Prison Staff
] as Warden Rudolph Hazen
[[James Cromwell]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authority and Control in a Prison Setting
Prison Staff
] as Guard Dunham
[[w:Steve Austin|Steve Austin]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts' determination in challenging circumstances
Convicts
] as "Baby Face" Bob Rainwater
[[w:Steve Reevis|Steve Reevis]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convict's Perspective on Life and Choices
Convicts
] as "Cheeseburger" Eddy
[[w:Terry Crews|Terry Crews]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authority and Control in Prison Settings
Prison Staff
] as Cpt. Wilhem Knauer
[[w:William Fichtner|William Fichtner]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convict Reflects on Life's Challenges
Convicts
] as Joey "Battle" Battaglio
[[w:Bill Goldberg|Bill Goldberg]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Get Even When You Can't Escape
Tagline
If you can't get out, get even.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Reflect on Their Situation
Convicts
] as Earl Megget
[[w:Nelly|Nelly]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Trust and Neighborhood Changes in The Longest Yard
Deacon
This better be on the up and up.
Paul Crewe
I guarantee it.
Deacon
Then let's do this shit.
[shakes Crewe's hand]
Earl Meggett
There goes the neighborhood.
[team laughs]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Embracing resilience in challenging circumstances
Convicts
] as Doc "Skitchy" Rivers
[[w:Eddie Bunker|Eddie Bunker]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Rallying Cry Against Authority
Caretaker
Now who we gonna crush?!
Crowd
THE GUARDS!
Caretaker
Who we gonna kill?!
Crowd
THE GUARDS!
Caretaker
Who we gonna kiss?!
Brucie
THE GUARDS!
Caretaker
Gotcha.
[everyone mocks Brucie]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Facing the Past and Uniting for Change
Paul Crewe
Huddle up! Look, I'm sure you already know this, but I've never said it out loud. I did throw that game. I did it. I was in a bad way with some worse people. After I did it, I felt so shitty, I wish I would have just let them kill me instead. Now the warden wants to pin Caretaker's murder on me if I don't throw this game. So it looks like I'm going to get to know you guys a lot better because I ain't doing that twice in a lifetime. We got a little time left. We can still do this. I'm begging you. Put your hands in here. Okay, thank you. Who are we?
[team puts hands together with him]
Mean Machine Players
MEAN MACHINE!!!
[takes the field]
Turley
I'm glad you are back. Now I don't have to stab you.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Unite for a Common Purpose
Convicts
] as Plunky
[[w:Rob Schneider|Rob Schneider]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Discuss Life and Choices
Convicts
] as Brucie
[[w:Nicholas Turturro|Nicholas Turturro]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Authority and Discipline in Prison Life
Prison Staff
] as Sgt. Engleheart
[[w:Kevin Nash|Kevin Nash]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Determination Amidst Adversity on the Field
Nate Scarborough
Did it rain last night?
Skitchy
Not a drop.
Paul Crewe
Son of a bitch. Okay, guys, the warden is trying to break our spirit. He thinks we're just going to call it day, wait for the field to dry, make up for it tomorrow. You know what, who gives a shit? Three days until game-time, we can handle it. But I'll tell you something else, that old man flooding this field tells me something: the guy is scared. Scared of you; sick, degenerate convicts. And you know what? He should be. Because I got news for you. We're going to win this game.
[Under his breath; Faces team]
Nate Scarborough
Did he say "win"?
Paul
So, what's it going to be? We can either cancel practice today, go back to our cells, wait for tomorrow, or we can prepare for the greatest ass-kicking fiesta in the history of football. I'll leave it to you guys.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Reflect on Their Situation
Convicts
] as Unger
[[w:David Patrick Kelly|David Patrick Kelly]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Convicts Embrace Team Spirit in Adversity
Convicts
] as Turley
[[w:The Great Khali|Dalip Singh]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
A Humorous Incident in the Press Box
Switowski
...I think I made him shit himself.
[Sniffs]
Nate Scarborough
I think he just shit himself.
Sportswriters in press box
I think he just shit himself.
Guards team trainer
Good lord, this guy shit himself big time.
[Loading Durham on a cart]
Switowski
See, I told you I made him shit himself!
[Laughs]
Earl Meggett
Yo, I'll be sure to send those books to you in the hospital, pimp!
[To Durham]
Deacon
And some diapers!
[Laughing]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Teamwork Among Convicts in Challenging Circumstances
Convicts
] as Coach Nate Scarborough
[[Burt Reynolds]
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Football Team Recruitment in Prison
Inmate
Hey, yo, check out this fake Slim Shady, man.
Cheeseburger Eddy
I knew you couldn't resist my shit. I got the shakes that will make you quake, I got the fries that will cross your eyes, I got the burgers that will... I just got burgers.
[Crewe shrugs head]
Paul Crewe
I'm all right. Thank you. Just wanted to talk to you fellas about possibly joining the football team.
Deacon
The only game we'd play with you is "Slap the Point-Shaving White Boy Till He Cries Like a Baby-Back Bitch.
Cheeseburger Eddy
Baby-back bitch, baby-back bitch Baby-back bitch.
[makes a robot dance as his friends laugh]
Caretaker
That's a big-ass robot.
Paul
Yeah.
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
Facing Challenges with Conviction and Teamwork
Convicts
Lobo Sebastian as Torres
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.