Humorous remark about a sack lunch
Sack's Friends:
That's what we call a sack lunch! Num-num-num-num-num!
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Prepare for the upcoming chaos
Sack's Friends:
Are you ready to have the noise brought on you?
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Maryland's Unique Traditions: Crab Cakes and Football
Sack's Friends:
Crab cakes and football, that's what Maryland does!
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A Wish for Painful Consequences
Jeremy Grey:
I hope you flip your bike over and knock out your two front teeth, you selfish son-of-a-bitch!
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Feeling Like Jodie Foster in The Accused
Jeremy Grey:
I felt like Jodie Foster in The Accused
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Consequences of Actions in the Real World
Jeremy Grey:
This is the real world, lady! You can't just go shooting people on a whim!
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Nostalgia of an Imaginary Childhood Friend
Jeremy Grey:
I mean, I had an imaginary friend when I was a kid and his name was Shiloh. We used to play checkers with each other every day and bless his heart, Shiloh'd always let me win!
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A Colorful Compliment from a Wedding Crasher
Jeremy Grey:
You motor-boating son of a bitch, you old sailor you!
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Self-Identification of a Casanova
Jeremy Grey:
I'm a cocksman!
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Unexpected Attraction in a Social Setting
Jeremy Grey:
Proper girl in the hat just eye-fucked the shit out of me.
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The Versatility of Maple Syrup
Jeremy Grey:
I happen to know everything there is to know about maple syrup. I love maple syrup! I love it on pancakes, I love it on pizza! I love to take maple syrup and put a little bit in my hair when I've had a rough week. What do you think holds it up, slick?
Quotes sourced from Wikiquote (© Wikiquote contributors), licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0. Modified for formatting/length.
First Asian Experience Expressed
Jeremy Grey:
Give me a break! That was my first Asian!
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Unexpected Events in a Hotel Room
Jeremy Grey:
Yeah that, or it could have been the midnight rape, or the nude gay art show that took place in my room last night.
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Claiming the Gift of the Painting
Jeremy Grey:
The painting was a gift, Todd. I'm taking it with me.
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A Call for Restraint
Jeremy Grey:
Lock it up!
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The Joy of Humor in Relationships
Jeremy Grey:
It feels so good when he jokes.
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Embracing Imperfection in Relationships
Jeremy Grey:
I'm not perfect, but who are we kidding, neither are you. And you want to know what? I dig it.
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Confidence in Skills and Performance
Jeremy Grey:
I was first-team All-State. I can put the ball wherever I want to. I'll make it rain out here.
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Trauma Affects Enjoyment of Simple Pleasures
Jeremy Grey:
I'm a little too traumatized to enjoy a scone right now.
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Confronting Fear in Unexpected Situations
Jeremy Grey:
I don’t think that you’re appreciating the urgency here. Not only is she a virgin, she’s totally off the reservation. I’m terrified of this broad.
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Urgent Escape from Relationship Complications
Jeremy Grey:
Did you hear what I just said to you? Stage five? Virgin? Clinger? Let’s go, I’m gonna start the car, I’m serious, let’s go.
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A Painful Commitment to Team Spirit
Jeremy Grey:
You go have fun. I'm gonna go ice my balls and spit up blood, Team Player!
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Play Like a Champion Without Excuses
Jeremy Grey:
Rule number 76: no excuses. Play like a champion.
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A Statement on Personal Style Choices
Jeremy Grey:
I don't even wear a belt...beltless.
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Confidence in Dance Skills
Jeremy Grey:
Oh please! You and I both know I'm a phenomenal dancer!
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Advice on Controlling Emotions
John Beckwith:
You better lock it up.
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Embracing Reality Amidst Wedding Chaos
John Beckwith:
It's the first quarter of the big game and you wanna toss up a hail Mary? I'd like to be pimps from Oakland or cowboys from Arizona but it's not Halloween. Grow up, Peter Pan! Count Chocula! Look, we've been to a million weddings and you know what? We've rocked them all.
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Comment on Steroid Use in Sports
John Beckwith:
I think he's on steroids. It's like trying to cover a fucking race horse.
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Confusion About Quails
John Beckwith:
I don't even know what the fuck a quail is!
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Recognition of a notable presence
John Beckwith:
There he is, the big guy!
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