Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) - Quotes

Quotes about Guardians of the Galaxy: [[w:Manohla Dargis|Manohla Dargis] * ], in "Yee-Ha! Space Cowboy Rides to the Rescue" The New York Times (31 July 2014)]

Quotes about Guardians of the Galaxy: [[wit; [beauty; [sensibility; [John Wayne; [Harrison Ford; [w:Chris Pratt|Chris Pratt] Here, a pulse, ], ] and a real ] have been slipped into the fray, alongside the clockwork guffaws, kabooms and splats. Lifted by a cast of professional charmers and a “What, me worry?” vibe, Guardians of the Galaxy is one of those interstellar westerns about a motley group of appealing baddies who rise to the heroic occasion and ride to the rescue, on spaceships rather than Appaloosas. The ] role here — or, really, the 1970s ] one — belongs to ], an easygoing, comic performer who’s very good at putting up a persuasive cute-dumb front and then shifting into a slyer, more knowing register. Quill is a good and a sometimes bad guy who fights and jokes amid swirling, polychromatic smoke … He comes into possession of a pretty blue rock that everyone would risk death trying to get … --> … There are different ways to get lost in a movie, and while Guardians takes you down one after another crazy narrative turn, it also pulls you into — and, for the most part, keeps you in — a fully realized other world.

Howard the Duck: [Takes a drink] What do you let it lick you like that for? Gross. Yeah! But it burns going down.

Quill: What should we do next? Something good? Something bad? Bit of both?

Gamora: We'll follow your lead– Star-Lord.

Quill: Bit of both!

Gamora: Your wife and child shall rest well, knowing that you have avenged them.

Drax: Yes. Of course Ronan was only a puppet. It's really Thanos that I need to kill.

Ronan: [Horrified] You're mortal! How?!

Quill: You said it yourself, bitch. We're the Guardians of the Galaxy.

Ronan: What are you doing?

Quill: Dance-off, bro! You and me.

Quill: [offers Gamora to join; Gamora shakes her head "no"; aaaaaand back to dancing] Come on! Subtle. Take it back.

Ronan: What are you doing?

Quill: I'm DISTRACTING ya, ya big turd-blossom!

Korath: Star-Lord!

Quill: Finally!

Drax: I just wanted to tell you how grateful I am that you've accepted me despite my blunders. It is pleasing to once again have friends. You, Quill, are my friend.

Quill: Thanks.

Drax: This dumb tree, he is my friend.

Drax: And this green whore, she too is my–

Gamora: OH, YOU MUST STOP!

Nebula: GAMORA! Look at what you have done! You have always been weak! You stupid, traitorous--

Drax: Nobody talks to my friends like that.

Drax: I can barely see.

Drax: [Awed] When did you learn to do that?

Quill: [Groot smiles and nods] Pretty sure the answer is "I am Groot.

Rhomann Dey: He said that he's "an a-hole". But he's not, and I'm quoting him here, "100% a dick".

Nova Prime: Do you believe him?

Rhomann Dey: Well, I don't believe anyone is 100% a dick, ma'am–

Nova Prime: I mean, do you believe that he's here to help?

Rhomann Dey: – Yeah.

Quill: [The others give him an off look] I look around at us– and you know what I see? Losers. I mean, like, folks who have lost stuff. And we have, man, we have, all of us. Our homes. Our families. Normal lives. And usually life takes more than it gives, but not today. Today it's giving us something. It is giving us a chance.

Drax: To do what?

Quill: –To give a shit, for once, and not run away. I for one am not going to stand by and watch as Ronan wipes out billions of innocent lives.

Rocket: But Quill– What you're asking us to do...stopping Ronan– It's impossible. You're asking us to die.

Quill: – Yeah. I guess I am.

Gamora: [Stands up] Quill, I have lived most of my life surrounded by my enemies. I will be grateful to die among my friends.

Drax: [Stands up] You are an honorable man, Quill. I will fight beside you. And in the end, I will see my wife and daughter again.

Groot: [Stands up] I am Groot.

Rocket: [Resigned sigh; Stands up] Aww, what the hell? I don't got that long a lifespan anyway. Well, now I'm standing. You all happy? We're all standing up now. Bunch of jackasses, standing in a circle.

Gamora: We have to stop Ronan.

Rocket: How?!

Quill: I have a plan.

Rocket: You've got a plan?

Quill: Yes.

Rocket: First of all, you're copying me from when I said I had a plan.

Quill: No, I'm not! People say that all the time, it's not that unique of a thing to say.

Rocket: Secondly, I don't even believe you have a plan.

Quill: I have... part of a plan!

Drax: What percentage of a plan do you have?

Gamora: You don't get to ask questions after that nonsense you pulled on Knowhere!

Drax: I just saved Quill!

Quill: We've already established that you destroying the ship that I'm on is not saving me!

Drax: When did we establish that?

Quill: Like, just a few seconds ago!

Drax: I wasn't listening, I was thinking of something else.

Gamora: [Frustrated] Aaugh–

Rocket: [To Drax; To Quill] She's right, you don't get an opinion. What percentage?

Quill: I dunno. Twelve percent.

Rocket: [Breaks into raucous laughter] Twelve percent"?!

Quill: That's a fake laugh.

Rocket: IT'S REAL!

Quill: Totally fake!

Rocket: That is the most real, authentic, hysterical laugh of my entire life, because that is not a plan!

Gamora: It's barely a concept.

Quill: You're taking their side?!

Groot: I am Groot.

Rocket: So what, "It's better than eleven percent"? What the hell does that have to do with anything?!

Quill: [To Groot; Groot starts eating a leaf on his shoulder] Thank you, Groot. Thank you. See? Groot's the only one of you who has a clue.

Yondu: [hits Quill; hits Quill again] You betrayed me?! Stealing my money?!

Gamora: Stop it! Leave him alone!

Yondu: [enraged] When I picked you up as a kid, these boys wanted to eat you! They ain't never tasted Terran before! I saved your life!

Quill: Oh, will you shut up about that?! God! Twenty years you've been throwing that in my face! Like it's some great thing, "not eating me"! Normal people don't even THINK about eating someone else! Much less, that person having to be grateful for it! You abducted me, man. You stole me from my home and from my family.

Yondu: [slamming his chest] You don't give a damn about your Terra! You're scared because you're soft! IN HERE! HERE! RIGHT HERE!

Gamora: YONDU! Listen to me! Ronan has something called an Infinity Stone!

Yondu: I know what he's got, girl.

Gamora: Then you know we must get it back! He's gonna use it to wipe out Xandar. We have to warn them. Billions of people will perish.

Yondu: [turns to Quill; slaps Quill, the Ravagers laugh; whistles, commanding his arrow fly over to point at Quill's throat] Is that what she's been filling your head with, boy? Sentiment? Eating away your brain like maggots! That's it.

Gamora: NO!

Yondu: Sorry, boy. But a captain's gotta teach his men what happens to those what cross him.

Kraglin: [the others grunt in agreement] Captain's gotta teach stuff!

Quill: If you kill me now, you are saying goodbye to the biggest score you have ever seen.

Yondu: [smiles, turns back to Quill and faces him] The Stone? I hope you got something better than that. Because ain't nobody stealing from Ronan.

Quill: We got a ringer.

Yondu: Is that right?

Quill: She knows everything there is to know about Ronan. His ships, his army.

Gamora: He's vulnerable.

Quill: Hey, what do you say, Yondu, huh? Me and you, taking down a mark side-by-side, like the old days.

Yondu: Let him go! Oh! You always did have a scrote, boy! That's why I kept you on as a young'un.

Ravager Pilot: Captain, the shot was non-damaging.

Rocket: Attention, idiots! The lunatic on the top of this craft is holding a Hadron Enforcer. A weapon of my own design.

Yondu: What the hell?

Rocket: If you don't hand over our companions now, he's gonna tear your ship a new one. A very big new one.

Yondu: I ain't buyin it!

Rocket: [Quill and Gamora start to panic] I am giving you to the count of five. Five, four, three–

Quill: No, wait! Hold on! Rocket, it's me! For God's sake! We figured it out! We're fine!

Rocket: [Nonchalantly] Oh, hey, Quill. What's going on?

Ronan: [speaking to Thanos by hologram] The Orb is in my possession, as I promised.

Thanos: Bring it to me.

Ronan: [Ronan cracks the Orb open, exposing the Stone] Yes, that was our agreement. Bring you the Orb, and you will destroy Xandar for me. However, now that I know it contains an Infinity Stone, I wonder what use I have for you?

Thanos: Boy! I would reconsider your current course!

Korath: Master, you cannot! Thanos is the most powerful being in the universe!

Ronan: [Ronan seizes the Stone and, before its power can consume him, implants the Stone in his warhammer. Once in control, he faces Thanos; Thanos ends the communication] Not anymore. YOU CALL ME "BOY"?! I will unfurl one thousand years of Kree justice on Xandar AND BURN IT TO ITS CORE! Then, Thanos, I'm coming for you.

Nebula: After Xandar, you are going to kill my father?

Ronan: You dare to oppose me?

Nebula: No. You see what he has turned me into. You kill him, I will help you destroy a thousand planets.

Rocket: [to Drax] Blasted idiot. They're all idiots! Quill just got himself captured! None of this ever would have happened if you didn't try to single-handedly take on a FRICKIN ARMY!

Drax: You're right. I was a fool. All the anger, all the rage, was just to cover my loss.

Rocket: [mimics Drax; Groot gasps, enraged; to Groot] Oh, boo-hoo-hoo. "My wife and child are dead." Oh, I don't care if it's mean! Everybody's got dead people! That's no excuse to get everybody else dead along the way! Come on, Groot. Ronan has the stone. The only chance we got is to get to the other side of the universe as fast as we can and maybe, just maybe, we'll be able to live full lives before that whack-job ever gets there.

Groot: [stands up] I am Groot.

Rocket: Save them? How?

Groot: I am Groot.

Rocket: I know they're the only friends that we ever had, but there's an army of Ravagers around them. And there's only two of us!

Drax: [stands up next to Groot] Three.

Rocket: YOU'RE MAKING... ME... BEAT... UP... GRASS!!!

Gamora: Quill? What happened?

Quill: [Gamora sighs with frustration] I saw you out there. I don't know what came over me, but I couldn't let you die. I found something inside of myself. Something incredibly heroic. I mean, not to brag, but objectively...

Gamora: Where's the orb?

Quill: It's...well, they got the orb.

Gamora: [just then a door opens and Yondu's men enter] What?!

Kraglin: Welcome home, Peter.

Nebula: You are a disappointment, sister. Out of all our siblings, I hated you least.

Gamora: Nebula, please. If Ronan gets this stone, he'll kill us all.

Nebula: [Smiles cruelly] Not all of us. You will already be dead.

Rocket: [to Groot] I told you, you can't fit. Now, wait here. I'll be back.

Gamora: How could I think Tivan could contain whatever was within the Orb?

Rocket: [Altogether shocked and shaken] WHAT DO YOU STILL HAVE IT FOR?!

Quill: Well, what were we gonna do? Leave it in there?

Rocket: [Ignoring Quill] I can't believe you had that in your purse!

Quill: [Defensive] It's not a purse; it's a knapsack!

Gamora: We have to take this to the Nova Corps. There's a chance they can contain it.

Rocket: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! We're wanted by the Nova Corps!! Just give it to Ronan!

Quill: What, so he can destroy the galaxy?!

Rocket: What are you? Some saint, all of a sudden? What has the galaxy ever done for you? Why would you wanna save it?!

Quill: BECAUSE I'M ONE OF THE IDIOTS WHO LIVES IN IT!

Gamora: Peter, listen to me. We cannot allow the stone to fall into Ronan's hands. We have to go back to your ship and deliver it to Nova.

Quill: Right, right, okay. I think you're right. Or we could give it to somebody who's not going to arrest us, who's really nice for a whole lot of money. I think it's a really good balance between both of your points of view.

Gamora: [they see Ronan's ship approaching Knowhere] You're despicable. Dishonorable. FAITHLESS! Oh, no.

Drax: [with his knives raised; laughs] At last! I shall meet my foe, and destroy him!

Quill: You called Ronan?!

Yondu: [they start running off] Quill! Don't you move, boy! Don't you--! Get out of the way!

Drax: Ronan the Accuser!

Ronan: You are the one who transmitted the message?

Drax: You killed my wife. You killed my daughter!

Rocket: Blah, blah, blah. We're all very fascinated, whitey. But we'd like to get paid.

The Collector: How would you like to get paid?

Rocket: What do you think, fancy man? Units!

The Collector: Very well, then...

The Collector: Carina. Stand back.

Carina: [last words; enraged] I WILL NO LONGER BE YOUR SLAVE!

The Collector: NO!

Quill: [sees Tivan's museum destroyed] What the...

The Collector: [he uses a device to unlock and open the orb; he shows them the giant beings that use the Infinity Stones as weapons] Oh, my new friends. Before creation itself, there were six singularities. Then the universe exploded into existence, and the remnants of these systems were forged into concentrated ingots. Infinity Stones. These stones, it seems, can only be brandished by beings of extraordinary strength. Observe. These carriers can use the stone to mow down entire civilizations like wheat in a field.

Quill: There's a little pee coming out of me right now.

The Collector: [the orb is opened to reveal an Infinity Stone] Once, for a moment, a group was able to share the energy amongst themselves, but even they were quickly destroyed by it. Beautiful. Beyond compare.

The Collector: [he kisses her hand] Oh, my dear Gamora. How wonderful to meet in the flesh.

Gamora: [as the Collector notices Groot] Let's bypass the formalities, Tivan. We have what we discussed.

The Collector: What is that thing there?

Groot: [the Collector goes over to Groot] I am Groot.

The Collector: I never thought I'd meet a Groot. Sir, you must allow me to pay you now so that I may own your carcass. At the moment of your death, of course.

Groot: I am Groot.

Rocket: Why, so he could turn you into a frickin chair?

The Collector: [to Groot] That's your pet?

Rocket: [Rocket goes to grab his weapon and the Collector chuckles, Gamora intervenes] His what?!

Gamora: Tivan, we have been halfway around the galaxy, retrieving this orb.

The Collector: Very well, then. Let us see what you brought.

Quill: Whoa! Whoa! What are you doing?!

Drax: This vermin speaks of affairs he knows nothing about!

Rocket: That is true!

Drax: HE HAS NO RESPECT!

Rocket: THAT IS ALSO TRUE!

Quill: HOLD ON, HOLD ON!

Rocket: Keep callin me "vermin", tough guy! You just wanna laugh at me, like everyone else!

Quill: Rocket, you're drunk. All right? No one's laughing at you.

Rocket: [Crying] He thinks I'm some stupid thing! He does! Well, I didn't ask to get made! I didn't ask to be torn apart and put back together over and over, and turned into some– some little monster!

Quill: Rocket, no one's calling you a monster.

Rocket: [Points at Drax; Gamora; Draws his rifle at Drax] He called me "vermin"! She called me "rodent"! Let's see if you can laugh after five or six good shots through your FRICKIN FACE!

Quill: No, no, no, no! FOUR BILLION UNITS! Rocket! Come on, man! Hey, suck it up for one more lousy night and you're rich!

Rocket: [He finally lowers his rifle] Fine. But I can't promise when all this is over, I'm not gonna kill every last one of you jerks.

Quill: [turning to Drax and Gamora] See?! That's exactly why none of you have any friends! Five seconds after you meet somebody, you're already trying to kill them!

Drax: [leaves the bar] We have traveled halfway across the quadrants! And Ronan is no closer to being dead.

Quill: Drax!

Gamora: Let him go. We don't need him.

Gamora: [[warrior; [assassin; [dance] I'm a ], an ]. I do not ].

Quill: [[Footloose; [hero; [w:Kevin Bacon|Kevin Bacon] Really? Well, on my planet, we have a legend about people like you. It's called ]. And in it, a great ], named ], teaches an entire city full of people with sticks up their butts that, dancing, well, is the greatest thing there is.

Gamora: Who put the sticks up their butts?

Quill: What? No, that's just a–

Gamora: That is cruel.

Gamora: And Quill? Your ship is filthy.

Quill: [[Jackson Pollock] Oh, she has no idea. If I had a black light, this place would look like a ] painting.

Rocket: [Disgusted] You got issues, Quill.

Drax: [To Quill] You! Man who has lain with an A'askvarian!

Quill: [Miffed] It was just one time, man.

Quill: Well, he's got a plan. Right? Or is that another thing you made up?

Rocket: I have a plan, I have a plan!

Drax: Cease your yammering and relieve us from this irksome confinement.

Quill: Yeah, I'll have to agree with the walking thesaurus on that one.

Drax: [deadpan] Do not ever call me a thesaurus.

Quill: It's just a metaphor, dude.

Rocket: His people are completely literal, metaphors are gonna go over his head.

Drax: Nothing goes over my head. My reflexes are too fast. I would catch it.

Gamora: I'm gonna die surrounded by the biggest idiots in the galaxy.

Quill: Those are big guns.

Watchtower Guard: Prisoner, drop the device immediately and retreat to your cell, or we will open fire.

Groot: [grows taller; roaring] I AM GROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTT!!!

Watchtower Guard: Fire.

Ronan:: My government knows no shame. You Xandarians and your culture are a disease.

Korath: [Aims his rifle at Quill] Drop it!

Peter Quill: Uh, hey.

Korath: [Gives an order to his men in his native language, then speaks to Quill] Drop it, now!

Quill: [Dropping the orb; The Sakaaran soldiers start to poke him with their Necroblasters] Hey, okay. Cool, man. No problem. No problem. At all.

Korath: [Picks up the orb] How do you know about this?

Quill: I don't even know what that is. I'm just a junker, man. Just checkin stuff out.

Korath: You don't look like a junker; you're wearing Ravager garb.

Quill: [Aside, to a Sakaaran soldier; [w:Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles|Ninja Turtle] This is just an outfit, man. ], you better stop poking me!

Korath: WHAT IS YOUR NAME?!

Quill: My name is Peter Quill! Okay? Dude, just chill out!

Korath: MOVE!

Quill: Why?

Korath: Ronan may have questions for you.

Quill: [Stalling; Pause] Hey, you know what? There's another name you might know me by! Star-Lord.

Korath: [Confused] Who?

Quill: [Disappointed; Korath simply shrugs] Star-Lord, man! The legendary outlaw? Guys?

Korath: MOVE!

Quill: Oh, forget this.